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War and Peace by graf Leo Tolstoy

CHAPTER XII

844 words  |  Chapter 221

For a long time that night Princess Mary sat by the open window of her room hearing the sound of the peasants’ voices that reached her from the village, but it was not of them she was thinking. She felt that she could not understand them however much she might think about them. She thought only of one thing, her sorrow, which, after the break caused by cares for the present, seemed already to belong to the past. Now she could remember it and weep or pray. After sunset the wind had dropped. The night was calm and fresh. Toward midnight the voices began to subside, a cock crowed, the full moon began to show from behind the lime trees, a fresh white dewy mist began to rise, and stillness reigned over the village and the house. Pictures of the near past—her father’s illness and last moments—rose one after another to her memory. With mournful pleasure she now lingered over these images, repelling with horror only the last one, the picture of his death, which she felt she could not contemplate even in imagination at this still and mystic hour of night. And these pictures presented themselves to her so clearly and in such detail that they seemed now present, now past, and now future. She vividly recalled the moment when he had his first stroke and was being dragged along by his armpits through the garden at Bald Hills, muttering something with his helpless tongue, twitching his gray eyebrows and looking uneasily and timidly at her. “Even then he wanted to tell me what he told me the day he died,” she thought. “He had always thought what he said then.” And she recalled in all its detail the night at Bald Hills before he had the last stroke, when with a foreboding of disaster she had remained at home against his will. She had not slept and had stolen downstairs on tiptoe, and going to the door of the conservatory where he slept that night had listened at the door. In a suffering and weary voice he was saying something to Tíkhon, speaking of the Crimea and its warm nights and of the Empress. Evidently he had wanted to talk. “And why didn’t he call me? Why didn’t he let me be there instead of Tíkhon?” Princess Mary had thought and thought again now. “Now he will never tell anyone what he had in his soul. Never will that moment return for him or for me when he might have said all he longed to say, and not Tíkhon but I might have heard and understood him. Why didn’t I enter the room?” she thought. “Perhaps he would then have said to me what he said the day he died. While talking to Tíkhon he asked about me twice. He wanted to see me, and I was standing close by, outside the door. It was sad and painful for him to talk to Tíkhon who did not understand him. I remember how he began speaking to him about Lise as if she were alive—he had forgotten she was dead—and Tíkhon reminded him that she was no more, and he shouted, ‘Fool!’ He was greatly depressed. From behind the door I heard how he lay down on his bed groaning and loudly exclaimed, ‘My God!’ Why didn’t I go in then? What could he have done to me? What could I have lost? And perhaps he would then have been comforted and would have said that word to me.” And Princess Mary uttered aloud the caressing word he had said to her on the day of his death. “Dear-est!” she repeated, and began sobbing, with tears that relieved her soul. She now saw his face before her. And not the face she had known ever since she could remember and had always seen at a distance, but the timid, feeble face she had seen for the first time quite closely, with all its wrinkles and details, when she stooped near to his mouth to catch what he said. “Dear-est!” she repeated again. “What was he thinking when he uttered that word? What is he thinking now?” This question suddenly presented itself to her, and in answer she saw him before her with the expression that was on his face as he lay in his coffin with his chin bound up with a white handkerchief. And the horror that had seized her when she touched him and convinced herself that that was not he, but something mysterious and horrible, seized her again. She tried to think of something else and to pray, but could do neither. With wide-open eyes she gazed at the moonlight and the shadows, expecting every moment to see his dead face, and she felt that the silence brooding over the house and within it held her fast. “Dunyásha,” she whispered. “Dunyásha!” she screamed wildly, and tearing herself out of this silence she ran to the servants’ quarters to meet her old nurse and the maidservants who came running toward her.
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Chapters

1. Chapter 1 2. CHAPTER XXVIII 3. CHAPTER XXI 4. CHAPTER XIX 5. CHAPTER XVI 6. CHAPTER XXII 7. CHAPTER XXVI 8. CHAPTER XIII 9. CHAPTER XXII 10. CHAPTER XXIII 11. CHAPTER XXXIX 12. CHAPTER XXXIV 13. CHAPTER XVI 14. CHAPTER XIX 15. CHAPTER XIX 16. CHAPTER XX 17. CHAPTER XVI 18. CHAPTER XII 19. CHAPTER I 20. CHAPTER II 21. CHAPTER III 22. CHAPTER IV 23. CHAPTER V 24. CHAPTER VI 25. CHAPTER VII 26. CHAPTER VIII 27. CHAPTER IX 28. CHAPTER X 29. CHAPTER XI 30. CHAPTER XII 31. CHAPTER XIII 32. CHAPTER XIV 33. CHAPTER XV 34. CHAPTER XVI 35. CHAPTER XVII 36. CHAPTER XVIII 37. CHAPTER XIX 38. CHAPTER XX 39. CHAPTER XXI 40. CHAPTER XXII 41. CHAPTER XXIII 42. CHAPTER XXIV 43. CHAPTER XXV 44. CHAPTER XXVI 45. CHAPTER XXVII 46. CHAPTER XXVIII 47. CHAPTER I 48. CHAPTER II 49. CHAPTER III 50. CHAPTER IV 51. CHAPTER V 52. CHAPTER VI 53. CHAPTER VII 54. CHAPTER VIII 55. CHAPTER IX 56. CHAPTER X 57. CHAPTER XI 58. CHAPTER XII 59. CHAPTER XIII 60. CHAPTER XIV 61. CHAPTER XV 62. CHAPTER XVI 63. CHAPTER XVII 64. CHAPTER XVIII 65. CHAPTER XIX 66. CHAPTER XX 67. CHAPTER XXI 68. CHAPTER I 69. CHAPTER II 70. CHAPTER III 71. CHAPTER IV 72. CHAPTER V 73. CHAPTER VI 74. CHAPTER VII 75. CHAPTER VIII 76. CHAPTER IX 77. CHAPTER X 78. CHAPTER XI 79. CHAPTER XII 80. CHAPTER XIII 81. CHAPTER XIV 82. CHAPTER XV 83. CHAPTER XVI 84. CHAPTER XVII 85. CHAPTER XVIII 86. CHAPTER XIX 87. CHAPTER I 88. CHAPTER II 89. CHAPTER III 90. CHAPTER IV 91. CHAPTER V 92. CHAPTER VI 93. CHAPTER VII 94. CHAPTER VIII 95. CHAPTER IX 96. CHAPTER X 97. CHAPTER XI 98. CHAPTER XII 99. CHAPTER XIII 100. CHAPTER XIV 101. CHAPTER XV 102. CHAPTER XVI 103. CHAPTER I 104. CHAPTER II 105. CHAPTER III 106. 1. Discretion, the keeping of the secrets of the Order. 2. Obedience to 107. CHAPTER IV 108. CHAPTER V 109. CHAPTER VI 110. CHAPTER VII 111. CHAPTER VIII 112. CHAPTER IX 113. CHAPTER X 114. CHAPTER XI 115. CHAPTER XII 116. CHAPTER XIII 117. CHAPTER XIV 118. CHAPTER XV 119. CHAPTER XVI 120. CHAPTER XVII 121. CHAPTER XVIII 122. CHAPTER XIX 123. CHAPTER XX 124. CHAPTER XXI 125. CHAPTER XXII 126. CHAPTER I 127. CHAPTER II 128. CHAPTER III 129. CHAPTER IV 130. CHAPTER V 131. CHAPTER VI 132. CHAPTER VII 133. CHAPTER VIII 134. CHAPTER IX 135. CHAPTER X 136. CHAPTER XI 137. CHAPTER XII 138. CHAPTER XIII 139. CHAPTER XIV 140. CHAPTER XV 141. CHAPTER XVI 142. CHAPTER XVII 143. CHAPTER XVIII 144. CHAPTER XIX 145. CHAPTER XX 146. CHAPTER XXI 147. CHAPTER XXII 148. CHAPTER XXIII 149. CHAPTER XXIV 150. CHAPTER XXV 151. CHAPTER XXVI 152. CHAPTER I 153. CHAPTER II 154. CHAPTER III 155. CHAPTER IV 156. CHAPTER V 157. CHAPTER VI 158. CHAPTER VII 159. CHAPTER VIII 160. CHAPTER IX 161. CHAPTER X 162. CHAPTER XI 163. CHAPTER XII 164. CHAPTER XIII 165. CHAPTER I 166. CHAPTER II 167. CHAPTER III 168. CHAPTER IV 169. CHAPTER V 170. CHAPTER VI 171. CHAPTER VII 172. CHAPTER VIII 173. CHAPTER IX 174. CHAPTER X 175. CHAPTER XI 176. CHAPTER XII 177. CHAPTER XIII 178. CHAPTER XIV 179. CHAPTER XV 180. CHAPTER XVI 181. CHAPTER XVII 182. CHAPTER XVIII 183. CHAPTER XIX 184. CHAPTER XX 185. CHAPTER XXI 186. CHAPTER XXII 187. CHAPTER I 188. CHAPTER II 189. CHAPTER III 190. CHAPTER IV 191. CHAPTER V 192. CHAPTER VI 193. CHAPTER VII 194. CHAPTER VIII 195. CHAPTER IX 196. CHAPTER X 197. CHAPTER XI 198. CHAPTER XII 199. CHAPTER XIII 200. CHAPTER XIV 201. CHAPTER XV 202. CHAPTER XVI 203. CHAPTER XVII 204. CHAPTER XVIII 205. CHAPTER XIX 206. CHAPTER XX 207. CHAPTER XXI 208. CHAPTER XXII 209. CHAPTER XXIII 210. CHAPTER I 211. CHAPTER II 212. CHAPTER III 213. CHAPTER IV 214. CHAPTER V 215. CHAPTER VI 216. CHAPTER VII 217. CHAPTER VIII 218. CHAPTER IX 219. CHAPTER X 220. CHAPTER XI 221. CHAPTER XII 222. CHAPTER XIII 223. CHAPTER XIV 224. CHAPTER XV 225. CHAPTER XVI 226. CHAPTER XVII 227. CHAPTER XVIII 228. CHAPTER XIX 229. CHAPTER XX 230. CHAPTER XXI 231. CHAPTER XXII 232. CHAPTER XXIII 233. CHAPTER XXIV 234. CHAPTER XXV 235. CHAPTER XXVI 236. CHAPTER XXVII 237. CHAPTER XXVIII 238. CHAPTER XXIX 239. CHAPTER XXX 240. CHAPTER XXXI 241. CHAPTER XXXII 242. CHAPTER XXXIII 243. CHAPTER XXXIV 244. CHAPTER XXXV 245. CHAPTER XXXVI 246. CHAPTER XXXVII 247. CHAPTER XXXVIII 248. CHAPTER XXXIX 249. CHAPTER I 250. CHAPTER II 251. CHAPTER III 252. CHAPTER IV 253. CHAPTER V 254. CHAPTER VI 255. CHAPTER VII 256. CHAPTER VIII 257. CHAPTER IX 258. CHAPTER X 259. CHAPTER XI 260. CHAPTER XII 261. CHAPTER XIII 262. CHAPTER XIV 263. CHAPTER XV 264. CHAPTER XVI 265. CHAPTER XVII 266. CHAPTER XVIII 267. CHAPTER XIX 268. CHAPTER XX 269. CHAPTER XXI 270. CHAPTER XXII 271. CHAPTER XXIII 272. CHAPTER XXIV 273. CHAPTER XXV 274. CHAPTER XXVI 275. CHAPTER XXVII 276. CHAPTER XXVIII 277. CHAPTER XXIX 278. CHAPTER XXX 279. CHAPTER XXXI 280. CHAPTER XXXII 281. CHAPTER XXXIII 282. CHAPTER XXXIV 283. CHAPTER I 284. CHAPTER II 285. CHAPTER III 286. CHAPTER IV 287. CHAPTER V 288. CHAPTER VI 289. CHAPTER VII 290. CHAPTER VIII 291. CHAPTER IX 292. CHAPTER X 293. CHAPTER XI 294. CHAPTER XII 295. CHAPTER XIII 296. CHAPTER XIV 297. CHAPTER XV 298. CHAPTER XVI 299. CHAPTER I 300. CHAPTER II 301. CHAPTER III 302. CHAPTER IV 303. CHAPTER V 304. CHAPTER VI 305. CHAPTER VII 306. CHAPTER VIII 307. CHAPTER IX 308. CHAPTER X 309. CHAPTER XI 310. CHAPTER XII 311. CHAPTER XIII 312. CHAPTER XIV 313. CHAPTER XV 314. CHAPTER XVI 315. CHAPTER XVII 316. CHAPTER XVIII 317. CHAPTER XIX 318. CHAPTER I 319. CHAPTER II 320. CHAPTER III 321. CHAPTER IV 322. CHAPTER V 323. CHAPTER VI 324. CHAPTER VII 325. CHAPTER VIII 326. CHAPTER IX 327. CHAPTER X 328. CHAPTER XI 329. CHAPTER XII 330. CHAPTER XIII 331. CHAPTER XIV 332. CHAPTER XV 333. CHAPTER XVI 334. CHAPTER XVII 335. CHAPTER XVIII 336. CHAPTER XIX 337. CHAPTER I 338. CHAPTER II 339. CHAPTER III 340. CHAPTER IV 341. CHAPTER V 342. CHAPTER VI 343. CHAPTER VII 344. CHAPTER VIII 345. CHAPTER IX 346. CHAPTER X 347. CHAPTER XI 348. CHAPTER XII 349. CHAPTER XIII 350. CHAPTER XIV 351. CHAPTER XV 352. CHAPTER XVI 353. CHAPTER XVII 354. CHAPTER XVIII 355. CHAPTER XIX 356. CHAPTER XX 357. CHAPTER I 358. CHAPTER II 359. CHAPTER III 360. CHAPTER IV 361. CHAPTER V 362. CHAPTER VI 363. CHAPTER VII 364. CHAPTER VIII 365. CHAPTER IX 366. CHAPTER X 367. CHAPTER XI 368. CHAPTER XII 369. CHAPTER XIII 370. CHAPTER XIV 371. CHAPTER XV 372. CHAPTER XVI 373. CHAPTER I 374. CHAPTER II 375. CHAPTER III 376. CHAPTER IV 377. CHAPTER V 378. CHAPTER VI 379. CHAPTER VII 380. CHAPTER VIII 381. CHAPTER IX 382. CHAPTER X 383. CHAPTER XI 384. CHAPTER XII

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