History of Tom Jones, a Foundling by Henry Fielding

Chapter xiii.

1959 words | Chapter 281

A dialogue between Jones and Partridge. The honest lovers of liberty will, we doubt not, pardon that long digression into which we were led at the close of the last chapter, to prevent our history from being applied to the use of the most pernicious doctrine which priestcraft had ever the wickedness or the impudence to preach. We will now proceed with Mr Jones, who, when the storm was over, took leave of his Egyptian majesty, after many thanks for his courteous behaviour and kind entertainment, and set out for Coventry; to which place (for it was still dark) a gypsy was ordered to conduct him. Jones having, by reason of his deviation, travelled eleven miles instead of six, and most of those through very execrable roads, where no expedition could have been made in quest of a midwife, did not arrive at Coventry till near twelve. Nor could he possibly get again into the saddle till past two; for post-horses were now not easy to get; nor were the hostler or post-boy in half so great a hurry as himself, but chose rather to imitate the tranquil disposition of Partridge; who, being denied the nourishment of sleep, took all opportunities to supply its place with every other kind of nourishment, and was never better pleased than when he arrived at an inn, nor ever more dissatisfied than when he was again forced to leave it. Jones now travelled post; we will follow him, therefore, according to our custom, and to the rules of Longinus, in the same manner. From Coventry he arrived at Daventry, from Daventry at Stratford, and from Stratford at Dunstable, whither he came the next day a little after noon, and within a few hours after Sophia had left it; and though he was obliged to stay here longer than he wished, while a smith, with great deliberation, shoed the post-horse he was to ride, he doubted not but to overtake his Sophia before she should set out from St Albans; at which place he concluded, and very reasonably, that his lordship would stop and dine. And had he been right in this conjecture, he most probably would have overtaken his angel at the aforesaid place; but unluckily my lord had appointed a dinner to be prepared for him at his own house in London, and, in order to enable him to reach that place in proper time, he had ordered a relay of horses to meet him at St Albans. When Jones therefore arrived there, he was informed that the coach-and-six had set out two hours before. If fresh post-horses had been now ready, as they were not, it seemed so apparently impossible to overtake the coach before it reached London, that Partridge thought he had now a proper opportunity to remind his friend of a matter which he seemed entirely to have forgotten; what this was the reader will guess, when we inform him that Jones had eat nothing more than one poached egg since he had left the alehouse where he had first met the guide returning from Sophia; for with the gypsies he had feasted only his understanding. The landlord so entirely agreed with the opinion of Mr Partridge, that he no sooner heard the latter desire his friend to stay and dine, than he very readily put in his word, and retracting his promise before given of furnishing the horses immediately, he assured Mr Jones he would lose no time in bespeaking a dinner, which, he said, could be got ready sooner than it was possible to get the horses up from grass, and to prepare them for their journey by a feed of corn. Jones was at length prevailed on, chiefly by the latter argument of the landlord; and now a joint of mutton was put down to the fire. While this was preparing, Partridge, being admitted into the same apartment with his friend or master, began to harangue in the following manner. “Certainly, sir, if ever man deserved a young lady, you deserve young Madam Western; for what a vast quantity of love must a man have, to be able to live upon it without any other food, as you do? I am positive I have eat thirty times as much within these last twenty-four hours as your honour, and yet I am almost famished; for nothing makes a man so hungry as travelling, especially in this cold raw weather. And yet I can't tell how it is, but your honour is seemingly in perfect good health, and you never looked better nor fresher in your life. It must be certainly love that you live upon.” “And a very rich diet too, Partridge,” answered Jones. “But did not fortune send me an excellent dainty yesterday? Dost thou imagine I cannot live more than twenty-four hours on this dear pocket-book?” “Undoubtedly,” cries Partridge, “there is enough in that pocket-book to purchase many a good meal. Fortune sent it to your honour very opportunely for present use, as your honour's money must be almost out by this time.” “What do you mean?” answered Jones; “I hope you don't imagine that I should be dishonest enough, even if it belonged to any other person, besides Miss Western----” “Dishonest!” replied Partridge, “heaven forbid I should wrong your honour so much! but where's the dishonesty in borrowing a little for present spending, since you will be so well able to pay the lady hereafter? No, indeed, I would have your honour pay it again, as soon as it is convenient, by all means; but where can be the harm in making use of it now you want it? Indeed, if it belonged to a poor body, it would be another thing; but so great a lady, to be sure, can never want it, especially now as she is along with a lord, who, it can't be doubted, will let her have whatever she hath need of. Besides, if she should want a little, she can't want the whole, therefore I would give her a little; but I would be hanged before I mentioned the having found it at first, and before I got some money of my own; for London, I have heard, is the very worst of places to be in without money. Indeed, if I had not known to whom it belonged, I might have thought it was the devil's money, and have been afraid to use it; but as you know otherwise, and came honestly by it, it would be an affront to fortune to part with it all again, at the very time when you want it most; you can hardly expect she should ever do you such another good turn; for _fortuna nunquam perpetuo est bona_. You will do as you please, notwithstanding all I say; but for my part, I would be hanged before I mentioned a word of the matter.” “By what I can see, Partridge,” cries Jones, “hanging is a matter _non longe alienum a Scaevolae studiis_.” “You should say _alienus_,” says Partridge,--“I remember the passage; it is an example under _communis, alienus, immunis, variis casibus serviunt_.” “If you do remember it,” cries Jones, “I find you don't understand it; but I tell thee, friend, in plain English, that he who finds another's property, and wilfully detains it from the known owner, deserves, _in foro conscientiae_, to be hanged, no less than if he had stolen it. And as for this very identical bill, which is the property of my angel, and was once in her dear possession, I will not deliver it into any hands but her own, upon any consideration whatever, no, though I was as hungry as thou art, and had no other means to satisfy my craving appetite; this I hope to do before I sleep; but if it should happen otherwise, I charge thee, if thou would'st not incur my displeasure for ever, not to shock me any more by the bare mention of such detestable baseness.” “I should not have mentioned it now,” cries Partridge, “if it had appeared so to me; for I'm sure I scorn any wickedness as much as another; but perhaps you know better; and yet I might have imagined that I should not have lived so many years, and have taught school so long, without being able to distinguish between _fas et nefas_; but it seems we are all to live and learn. I remember my old schoolmaster, who was a prodigious great scholar, used often to say, _Polly matete cry town is my daskalon_. The English of which, he told us, was, That a child may sometimes teach his grandmother to suck eggs. I have lived to a fine purpose, truly, if I am to be taught my grammar at this time of day. Perhaps, young gentleman, you may change your opinion, if you live to my years: for I remember I thought myself as wise when I was a stripling of one or two and twenty as I am now. I am sure I always taught _alienus_, and my master read it so before me.” There were not many instances in which Partridge could provoke Jones, nor were there many in which Partridge himself could have been hurried out of his respect. Unluckily, however, they had both hit on one of these. We have already seen Partridge could not bear to have his learning attacked, nor could Jones bear some passage or other in the foregoing speech. And now, looking upon his companion with a contemptuous and disdainful air (a thing not usual with him), he cried, “Partridge, I see thou art a conceited old fool, and I wish thou art not likewise an old rogue. Indeed, if I was as well convinced of the latter as I am of the former, thou should'st travel no farther in my company.” The sage pedagogue was contented with the vent which he had already given to his indignation; and, as the vulgar phrase is, immediately drew in his horns. He said, he was sorry he had uttered anything which might give offence, for that he had never intended it; but _Nemo omnibus horis sapit_. As Jones had the vices of a warm disposition, he was entirely free from those of a cold one; and if his friends must have confest his temper to have been a little too easily ruffled, his enemies must at the same time have confest, that it as soon subsided; nor did it at all resemble the sea, whose swelling is more violent and dangerous after a storm is over than while the storm itself subsists. He instantly accepted the submission of Partridge, shook him by the hand, and with the most benign aspect imaginable, said twenty kind things, and at the same time very severely condemned himself, though not half so severely as he will most probably be condemned by many of our good readers. Partridge was now highly comforted, as his fears of having offended were at once abolished, and his pride completely satisfied by Jones having owned himself in the wrong, which submission he instantly applied to what had principally nettled him, and repeated in a muttering voice, “To be sure, sir, your knowledge may be superior to mine in some things; but as to the grammar, I think I may challenge any man living. I think, at least, I have that at my finger's end.” If anything could add to the satisfaction which the poor man now enjoyed, he received this addition by the arrival of an excellent shoulder of mutton, that at this instant came smoaking to the table. On which, having both plentifully feasted, they again mounted their horses, and set forward for London.

Chapters

1. Chapter 1 2. BOOK I -- CONTAINING AS MUCH OF THE BIRTH OF THE FOUNDLING AS IS 3. Chapter i -- The introduction to the work, or bill of fare to the 4. Chapter ii -- A short description of squire Allworthy, and a fuller 5. Chapter iii -- An odd accident which befel Mr Allworthy at his return 6. Chapter iv -- The reader's neck brought into danger by a description; 7. Chapter v -- Containing a few common matters, with a very uncommon 8. Chapter vi -- Mrs Deborah is introduced into the parish with a 9. Chapter vii -- Containing such grave matter, that the reader cannot 10. Chapter viii -- A dialogue between Mesdames Bridget and Deborah; 11. Chapter x -- The hospitality of Allworthy; with a short sketch of the 12. Chapter xi -- Containing many rules, and some examples, concerning 13. Chapter xii -- Containing what the reader may, perhaps, expect to find 14. Chapter xiii -- Which concludes the first book; with an instance of 15. BOOK II -- CONTAINING SCENES OF MATRIMONIAL FELICITY IN DIFFERENT 16. Chapter i -- Showing what kind of a history this is; what it is like, 17. Chapter ii -- Religious cautions against showing too much favour to 18. Chapter iii -- The description of a domestic government founded upon 19. Chapter iv -- Containing one of the most bloody battles, or rather 20. Chapter v -- Containing much matter to exercise the judgment and 21. Chapter vi -- The trial of Partridge, the schoolmaster, for 22. Chapter vii -- A short sketch of that felicity which prudent couples 23. Chapter viii -- A receipt to regain the lost affections of a wife, 24. Chapter ix -- A proof of the infallibility of the foregoing receipt, 25. BOOK III -- CONTAINING THE MOST MEMORABLE TRANSACTIONS WHICH PASSED IN 26. Chapter ii -- The heroe of this great history appears with very bad 27. Chapter iii -- The character of Mr Square the philosopher, and of Mr 28. Chapter iv. 29. Chapter v. -- The opinions of the divine and the philosopher 30. Chapter vi -- Containing a better reason still for the 31. Chapter vii -- In which the author himself makes his appearance on the 32. Chapter viii -- A childish incident, in which, however, is seen a 33. Chapter ix -- Containing an incident of a more heinous kind, with the 34. Chapter x -- In which Master Blifil and Jones appear in different 35. Chapter ii -- A short hint of what we can do in the sublime, and a 36. Chapter iii -- Wherein the history goes back to commemorate a trifling 37. Chapter iv -- Containing such very deep and grave matters, that some 38. Chapter vi -- An apology for the insensibility of Mr Jones to all the 39. Chapter viii -- A battle sung by the muse in the Homerican style, and 40. Chapter x -- A story told by Mr Supple, the curate. The penetration of 41. Chapter xi -- The narrow escape of Molly Seagrim, with some 42. Chapter xii -- Containing much clearer matters; but which flowed from 43. Chapter xiii -- A dreadful accident which befel Sophia. The gallant 44. Chapter xiv -- The arrival of a surgeon.--His operations, and a long 45. BOOK V -- CONTAINING A PORTION OF TIME SOMEWHAT LONGER THAN HALF A 46. Chapter i -- Of the SERIOUS in writing, and for what purpose it is 47. Chapter ii -- In which Mr Jones receives many friendly visits during 48. Chapter iii -- Which all who have no heart will think to contain much 49. Chapter iv -- A little chapter, in which is contained a little 50. Chapter vi -- By comparing which with the former, the reader may 51. Chapter ix -- Which, among other things, may serve as a comment on 52. Chapter x -- Showing the truth of many observations of Ovid, and of 53. Chapter xi -- In which a simile in Mr Pope's period of a mile 54. Chapter xii -- In which is seen a more moving spectacle than all the 55. Chapter ii -- The character of Mrs Western. Her great learning and 56. Chapter v -- In which is related what passed between Sophia and her 57. Chapter vi -- Containing a dialogue between Sophia and Mrs Honour, 58. Chapter vii -- A picture of formal courtship in miniature, as it 59. Chapter xi -- A short chapter; but which contains sufficient matter to 60. Chapter xiii -- The behaviour of Sophia on the present occasion; which 61. Chapter xiv -- A short chapter, containing a short dialogue between 62. Chapter ii -- Containing a conversation which Mr Jones had with 63. Chapter vii -- A strange resolution of Sophia, and a more strange 64. Chapter viii -- Containing scenes of altercation, of no very uncommon 65. Chapter ix -- The wise demeanour of Mr Western in the character of a 66. Chapter x -- Containing several matters, natural enough perhaps, but 67. Chapter xiii -- Containing the great address of the landlady, the 68. Chapter xiv -- A most dreadful chapter indeed; and which few readers 69. Chapter i -- A wonderful long chapter concerning the marvellous; being 70. Chapter iv -- In which is introduced one of the pleasantest barbers 71. Chapter vi -- In which more of the talents of Mr Benjamin will appear, 72. Chapter vii -- Containing better reasons than any which have yet 73. Chapter viii -- Jones arrives at Gloucester, and goes to the Bell; the 74. Chapter ix -- Containing several dialogues between Jones and 75. Chapter x -- In which our travellers meet with a very extraordinary 76. Chapter xi -- In which the Man of the Hill begins to relate his 77. Chapter xv -- A brief history of Europe; and a curious discourse 78. Chapter i -- Of those who lawfully may, and of those who may not, 79. Chapter ii -- Containing a very surprizing adventure indeed, which Mr 80. Chapter iii -- The arrival of Mr Jones with his lady at the inn; with 81. Chapter iv -- In which the arrival of a man of war puts a final end to 82. Chapter v -- An apology for all heroes who have good stomachs, with a 83. Chapter vi -- A friendly conversation in the kitchen, which had a very 84. Chapter vii -- Containing a fuller account of Mrs Waters, and by what 85. Chapter i -- Containing instructions very necessary to be perused by 86. Chapter ii -- Containing the arrival of an Irish gentleman, with very 87. Chapter iii -- A dialogue between the landlady and Susan the 88. Chapter iv -- Containing infallible nostrums for procuring universal 89. Chapter v -- Showing who the amiable lady, and her unamiable maid, 90. Chapter vi -- Containing, among other things, the ingenuity of 91. Chapter vii -- In which are concluded the adventures that happened at 92. Chapter ii -- The adventures which Sophia met with after her leaving 93. Chapter iii -- A very short chapter, in which however is a sun, a 94. Chapter vi -- In which the mistake of the landlord throws Sophia into 95. Chapter viii -- A dreadful alarm in the inn, with the arrival of an 96. Chapter ix -- The morning introduced in some pretty writing. A 97. Chapter x -- Containing a hint or two concerning virtue, and a few 98. Chapter i -- Showing what is to be deemed plagiarism in a modern 99. Chapter ii -- In which, though the squire doth not find his daughter, 100. Chapter iii -- The departure of Jones from Upton, with what passed 101. Chapter v -- Containing more adventures which Mr Jones and his 102. Chapter vi -- From which it may be inferred that the best things are 103. Chapter vii -- Containing a remark or two of our own and many more of 104. Chapter viii -- In which fortune seems to have been in a better humour 105. Chapter xi -- The disasters which befel Jones on his departure for 106. Chapter xii -- Relates that Mr Jones continued his journey, contrary 107. Chapter xiv -- What happened to Mr Jones in his journey from St 108. Chapter iii -- A project of Mrs Fitzpatrick, and her visit to Lady 109. Chapter v -- An adventure which happened to Mr Jones at his lodgings, 110. Chapter vi -- What arrived while the company were at breakfast, with 111. Chapter viii -- Containing a scene of distress, which will appear very 112. Chapter ix -- Which treats of matters of a very different kind from 113. Chapter x -- A chapter which, though short, may draw tears from some 114. Chapter i -- An essay to prove that an author will write the better 115. Chapter ii -- Containing letters and other matters which attend 116. Chapter iv -- Which we hope will be very attentively perused by young 117. Chapter vi -- Containing a scene which we doubt not will affect all 118. Chapter viii -- What passed between Jones and old Mr Nightingale; with 119. Chapter iv -- By which it will appear how dangerous an advocate a lady 120. Chapter v -- Containing some matters which may affect, and others 121. Chapter x -- Consisting partly of facts, and partly of observations 122. Chapter ii -- A whimsical adventure which befel the squire, with the 123. Chapter v -- In which Jones receives a letter from Sophia, and goes to 124. Chapter vii -- In which Mr Western pays a visit to his sister, in 125. Chapter iii -- The arrival of Mr Western, with some matters concerning 126. Chapter iii -- Allworthy visits old Nightingale; with a strange 127. Chapter xii -- Approaching still nearer to the end. 128. BOOK I. 129. Chapter i. 130. Chapter ii. 131. Chapter iii. 132. Chapter iv. 133. Chapter v. 134. Chapter vi. 135. Chapter vii. 136. Chapter viii. 137. Chapter ix. 138. Chapter x. 139. Chapter xi. 140. Chapter xii. 141. Chapter xiii. 142. BOOK II. 143. Chapter i. 144. Chapter ii. 145. Chapter iii. 146. Chapter iv. 147. Chapter v. 148. Chapter vi. 149. Chapter vii. 150. Chapter viii. 151. Chapter ix. 152. BOOK III. 153. Chapter i. 154. Chapter ii. 155. Chapter iii. 156. Chapter iv. 157. Chapter v. 158. Chapter vi. 159. Chapter vii. 160. Chapter viii. 161. Chapter ix. 162. Chapter x. 163. BOOK IV. 164. Chapter i. 165. Chapter ii. 166. Chapter iii. 167. Chapter iv. 168. Chapter v. 169. Chapter vi. 170. Chapter vii. 171. Chapter viii. 172. Chapter ix. 173. Chapter x. 174. Chapter xi. 175. Chapter xii. 176. Chapter xiii. 177. Chapter xiv. 178. BOOK V. 179. Chapter i. 180. Chapter ii. 181. Chapter iii. 182. Chapter iv. 183. Chapter v. 184. Chapter vi. 185. Chapter vii. 186. Chapter viii. 187. Chapter ix. 188. Chapter x. 189. Chapter xi. 190. Chapter xii. 191. BOOK VI. 192. Chapter i. 193. Chapter ii. 194. Chapter iii. 195. Chapter iv. 196. Chapter v. 197. Chapter vi. 198. Chapter vii. 199. Chapter viii. 200. Chapter ix. 201. Chapter x. 202. Chapter xi. 203. Chapter xii. 204. Chapter xiii. 205. Chapter xiv. 206. BOOK VII. 207. Chapter i. 208. Chapter ii. 209. Chapter iii. 210. Chapter iv. 211. Chapter v. 212. Chapter vi. 213. Chapter vii. 214. Chapter viii. 215. Chapter ix. 216. Chapter x. 217. Chapter xi. 218. Chapter xii. 219. Chapter xiii. 220. Chapter xiv. 221. Chapter xv. 222. BOOK VIII. 223. Chapter i. 224. Chapter ii. 225. Chapter iii. 226. Chapter iv. 227. Chapter v. 228. Chapter vi. 229. Chapter vii. 230. Chapter viii. 231. Chapter ix. 232. Chapter x. 233. Chapter xi. 234. 1657. My father was one of those whom they call gentlemen farmers. He 235. Chapter xii. 236. Chapter xiii. 237. Chapter xiv. 238. Chapter xv. 239. BOOK IX. 240. Chapter i. 241. Chapter ii. 242. Chapter iii. 243. Chapter iv. 244. Chapter v. 245. Chapter vi. 246. Chapter vii. 247. BOOK X. 248. Chapter i. 249. Chapter ii. 250. Chapter iii. 251. Chapter iv. 252. Chapter v. 253. Chapter vi. 254. Chapter vii. 255. Chapter viii. 256. Chapter ix. 257. BOOK XI. 258. Chapter i. 259. Chapter ii. 260. Chapter iii. 261. Chapter iv. 262. Chapter v. 263. Chapter vi. 264. Chapter vii. 265. Chapter viii. 266. Chapter ix. 267. Chapter x. 268. BOOK XII. 269. Chapter i. 270. Chapter ii. 271. Chapter iii. 272. Chapter iv. 273. Chapter v. 274. Chapter vi. 275. Chapter vii. 276. Chapter viii. 277. Chapter ix. 278. Chapter x. 279. Chapter xi. 280. Chapter xii. 281. Chapter xiii. 282. Chapter xiv. 283. BOOK XIII. 284. Chapter i. 285. Chapter ii. 286. Chapter iii. 287. Chapter iv. 288. Chapter v. 289. Chapter vi. 290. Chapter vii. 291. Chapter viii. 292. Chapter ix. 293. Chapter x. 294. Chapter xi. 295. Chapter xii. 296. BOOK XIV. 297. Chapter i. 298. Chapter ii. 299. Chapter iii. 300. introduction, began the following speech:--“I am very sorry, sir, to 301. Chapter iv. 302. Chapter v. 303. Chapter vi. 304. Chapter vii. 305. Chapter viii. 306. Chapter ix. 307. Chapter x. 308. BOOK XV. 309. Chapter i. 310. Chapter ii. 311. Chapter iii. 312. Chapter iv. 313. Chapter v. 314. Chapter vi. 315. Chapter vii. 316. Chapter viii. 317. Chapter ix. 318. Chapter x. 319. Chapter xi. 320. Chapter xii. 321. BOOK XVI. 322. Chapter i. 323. Chapter ii. 324. Chapter iii. 325. Chapter iv. 326. Chapter v. 327. Chapter vi. 328. Chapter vii. 329. Chapter viii. 330. Chapter ix. 331. Chapter x. 332. BOOK XVII. 333. Chapter i. 334. Chapter ii. 335. Chapter iii. 336. Chapter iv. 337. Chapter v. 338. Chapter vi. 339. Chapter vii. 340. Chapter viii. 341. Chapter ix. 342. BOOK XVIII. 343. Chapter i. 344. Chapter ii. 345. Chapter iii. 346. Chapter iv. 347. Chapter v. 348. Chapter vi. 349. Chapter vii. 350. Chapter viii. 351. Chapter ix. 352. Chapter x. 353. Chapter xi. 354. Chapter xii.

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