Complete Original Short Stories of Guy De Maupassant by Guy de Maupassant
episode or other occurs in the neighborhood, the disreputable story dies
74143 words | Chapter 9
a natural death when it reaches the threshold of the house. The father
and mother may, perhaps, exchange a few words on the subject when alone
together some evening, but they speak in hushed tones—for even walls
have ears. The father says, with bated breath:
“You've heard of that terrible affair in the Rivoil family?”
And the mother answers:
“Who would have dreamed of such a thing? It's dreadful.”
The children suspected nothing, and arrive in their turn at years of
discretion with eyes and mind blindfolded, ignorant of the real side of
life, not knowing that people do not think as they speak, and do not
speak as they act; or aware that they should live at war, or at all
events, in a state of armed peace, with the rest of mankind; not
suspecting the fact that the simple are always deceived, the sincere
made sport of, the good maltreated.
Some go on till the day of their death in this blind probity and loyalty
and honor, so pure-minded that nothing can open their eyes.
Others, undeceived, but without fully understanding, make mistakes, are
dismayed, and become desperate, believing themselves the playthings of a
cruel fate, the wretched victims of adverse circumstances, and
exceptionally wicked men.
The Savignols married their daughter Bertha at the age of eighteen. She
wedded a young Parisian, George Baron by name, who had dealings on the
Stock Exchange. He was handsome, well-mannered, and apparently all that
could be desired. But in the depths of his heart he somewhat despised
his old-fashioned parents-in-law, whom he spoke of among his intimates
as “my dear old fossils.”
He belonged to a good family, and the girl was rich. They settled down
in Paris.
She became one of those provincial Parisians whose name is legion. She
remained in complete ignorance of the great city, of its social side,
its pleasures and its customs—just as she remained ignorant also of
life, its perfidy and its mysteries.
Devoted to her house, she knew scarcely anything beyond her own street;
and when she ventured into another part of Paris it seemed to her that
she had accomplished a long and arduous journey into some unknown,
unexplored city. She would then say to her husband in the evening:
“I have been through the boulevards to-day.”
Two or three times a year her husband took her to the theatre. These
were events the remembrance of which never grew dim; they provided
subjects of conversation for long afterward.
Sometimes three months afterward she would suddenly burst into laughter,
and exclaim:
“Do you remember that actor dressed up as a general, who crowed like a
cock?”
Her friends were limited to two families related to her own. She spoke
of them as “the Martinets” and “the Michelins.”
Her husband lived as he pleased, coming home when it suited him
—sometimes not until dawn—alleging business, but not putting himself out
overmuch to account for his movements, well aware that no suspicion
would ever enter his wife's guileless soul.
But one morning she received an anonymous letter.
She was thunderstruck—too simple-minded to understand the infamy of
unsigned information and to despise the letter, the writer of which
declared himself inspired by interest in her happiness, hatred of evil,
and love of truth.
This missive told her that her husband had had for two years past, a
sweetheart, a young widow named Madame Rosset, with whom he spent all
his evenings.
Bertha knew neither how to dissemble her grief nor how to spy on her
husband. When he came in for lunch she threw the letter down before him,
burst into tears, and fled to her room.
He had time to take in the situation and to prepare his reply. He
knocked at his wife's door. She opened it at once, but dared not look at
him. He smiled, sat down, drew her to his knee, and in a tone of light
raillery began:
“My dear child, as a matter of fact, I have a friend named Madame
Rosset, whom I have known for the last ten years, and of whom I have a
very high opinion. I may add that I know scores of other people whose
names I have never mentioned to you, seeing that you do not care for
society, or fresh acquaintances, or functions of any sort. But, to make
short work of such vile accusations as this, I want you to put on your
things after lunch, and we'll go together and call on this lady, who
will very soon become a friend of yours, too, I am quite sure.”
She embraced her husband warmly, and, moved by that feminine spirit of
curiosity which will not be lulled once it is aroused, consented to go
and see this unknown widow, of whom she was, in spite of everything,
just the least bit jealous. She felt instinctively that to know a danger
is to be already armed against it.
She entered a small, tastefully furnished flat on the fourth floor of an
attractive house. After waiting five minutes in a drawing-room rendered
somewhat dark by its many curtains and hangings, a door opened, and a
very dark, short, rather plump young woman appeared, surprised and
smiling.
George introduced them:
“My wife—Madame Julie Rosset.”
The young widow uttered a half-suppressed cry of astonishment and joy,
and ran forward with hands outstretched. She had not hoped, she said, to
have this pleasure, knowing that Madame Baron never saw any one, but she
was delighted to make her acquaintance. She was so fond of George (she
said “George” in a familiar, sisterly sort of way) that, she had been
most anxious to know his young wife and to make friends with her, too.
By the end of a month the two new friends were inseparable. They saw
each other every day, sometimes twice a day, and dined together every
evening, sometimes at one house, sometimes at the other. George no
longer deserted his home, no longer talked of pressing business. He
adored his own fireside, he said.
When, after a time, a flat in the house where Madame Rosset lived became
vacant Madame Baron hastened to take it, in order to be near her friend
and spend even more time with her than hitherto.
And for two whole years their friendship was without a cloud, a
friendship of heart and mind—absolute, tender, devoted. Bertha could
hardly speak without bringing in Julie's name. To her Madame Rosset
represented perfection.
She was utterly happy, calm and contented.
But Madame Rosset fell ill. Bertha hardly left her side. She spent her
nights with her, distracted with grief; even her husband seemed
inconsolable.
One morning the doctor, after leaving the invalid's bedside, took George
and his wife aside, and told them that he considered Julie's condition
very grave.
As soon as he had gone the grief-stricken husband and wife sat down
opposite each other and gave way to tears. That night they both sat up
with the patient. Bertha tenderly kissed her friend from time to time,
while George stood at the foot of the bed, his eyes gazing steadfastly
on the invalid's face.
The next day she was worse.
But toward evening she declared she felt better, and insisted that her
friends should go back to their own apartment to dinner.
They were sitting sadly in the dining-room, scarcely even attempting to
eat, when the maid gave George a note. He opened it, turned pale as
death, and, rising from the table, said to his wife in a constrained
voice:
“Wait for me. I must leave you a moment. I shall be back in ten minutes.
Don't go away on any account.”
And he hurried to his room to get his hat.
Bertha waited for him, a prey to fresh anxiety. But, docile in
everything, she would not go back to her friend till he returned.
At length, as he did not reappear, it occurred to her to visit his room
and see if he had taken his gloves. This would show whether or not he
had had a call to make.
She saw them at the first glance. Beside them lay a crumpled paper,
evidently thrown down in haste.
She recognized it at once as the note George had received.
And a burning temptation, the first that had ever assailed her urged her
to read it and discover the cause of her husband's abrupt departure. Her
rebellious conscience protested but a devouring and fearful curiosity
prevailed. She seized the paper, smoothed it out, recognized the
tremulous, penciled writing as Julie's, and read:
“Come alone and kiss me, my poor dear. I am dying.”
At first she did not understand, the idea of Julie's death being her
uppermost thought. But all at once the true meaning of what she read
burst in a flash upon her; this penciled note threw a lurid light upon
her whole existence, revealed the whole infamous truth, all the
treachery and perfidy of which she had been the victim. She understood
the long years of deceit, the way in which she had been made their
puppet. She saw them again, sitting side by side in the evening, reading
by lamplight out of the same book, glancing at each other at the end of
each page.
And her poor, indignant, suffering, bleeding heart was cast into the
depths of a despair which knew no bounds.
Footsteps drew near; she fled, and shut herself in her own room.
Presently her husband called her:
“Come quickly! Madame Rosset is dying.”
Bertha appeared at her door, and with trembling lips replied:
“Go back to her alone; she does not need me.”
He looked at her stupidly, dazed with grief, and repeated:
“Come at once! She's dying, I tell you!”
Bertha answered:
“You would rather it were I.”
Then at last he understood, and returned alone to the dying woman's
bedside.
He mourned her openly, shamelessly, indifferent to the sorrow of the
wife who no longer spoke to him, no longer looked at him; who passed her
life in solitude, hedged round with disgust, with indignant anger, and
praying night and day to God.
They still lived in the same house, however, and sat opposite each other
at table, in silence and despair.
Gradually his sorrow grew less acute; but she did not forgive him.
And so their life went on, hard and bitter for them both.
For a whole year they remained as complete strangers to each other as if
they had never met. Bertha nearly lost her reason.
At last one morning she went out very early, and returned about eight
o'clock bearing in her hands an enormous bouquet of white roses. And she
sent word to her husband that she wanted to speak to him. He came-
anxious and uneasy.
“We are going out together,” she said. “Please carry these flowers; they
are too heavy for me.”
A carriage took them to the gate of the cemetery, where they alighted.
Then, her eyes filling with tears, she said to George:
“Take me to her grave.”
He trembled, and could not understand her motive; but he led the way,
still carrying the flowers. At last he stopped before a white marble
slab, to which he pointed without a word.
She took the bouquet from him, and, kneeling down, placed it on the
grave. Then she offered up a silent, heartfelt prayer.
Behind her stood her husband, overcome by recollections of the past.
She rose, and held out her hands to him.
“If you wish it, we will be friends,” she said.
IN THE SPRING
With the first day of spring, when the awakening earth puts on its
garment of green, and the warm, fragrant air fans our faces and fills
our lungs and appears even to penetrate to our hearts, we experience a
vague, undefined longing for freedom, for happiness, a desire to run, to
wander aimlessly, to breathe in the spring. The previous winter having
been unusually severe, this spring feeling was like a form of
intoxication in May, as if there were an overabundant supply of sap.
One morning on waking I saw from my window the blue sky glowing in the
sun above the neighboring houses. The canaries hanging in the windows
were singing loudly, and so were the servants on every floor; a cheerful
noise rose up from the streets, and I went out, my spirits as bright as
the day, to go—I did not exactly know where. Everybody I met seemed to
be smiling; an air of happiness appeared to pervade everything in the
warm light of returning spring. One might almost have said that a breeze
of love was blowing through the city, and the sight of the young women
whom I saw in the streets in their morning toilets, in the depths of
whose eyes there lurked a hidden tenderness, and who walked with languid
grace, filled my heart with agitation.
Without knowing how or why, I found myself on the banks of the Seine.
Steamboats were starting for Suresnes, and suddenly I was seized by an
unconquerable desire to take a walk through the woods. The deck of the
Mouche was covered with passengers, for the sun in early spring draws
one out of the house, in spite of themselves, and everybody moves about,
goes and comes and talks to his neighbor.
I had a girl neighbor; a little work-girl, no doubt, who possessed the
true Parisian charm: a little head, with light curly hair, which looked
like a shimmer of light as it danced in the wind, came down to her ears,
and descended to the nape of her neck, where it became such fine, light-
colored clown that one could scarcely see it, but felt an irresistible
desire to shower kisses on it.
Under my persistent gaze, she turned her head toward me, and then
immediately looked down, while a slight crease at the side of her mouth,
that was ready to break out into a smile, also showed a fine, silky,
pale down which the sun was gilding a little.
The calm river grew wider; the atmosphere was warm and perfectly still,
but a murmur of life seemed to fill all space.
My neighbor raised her eyes again, and this time, as I was still looking
at her, she smiled decidedly. She was charming, and in her passing
glance I saw a thousand things, which I had hitherto been ignorant of,
for I perceived unknown depths, all the charm of tenderness, all the
poetry which we dream of, all the happiness which we are continually in
search of. I felt an insane longing to open my arms and to carry her off
somewhere, so as to whisper the sweet music of words of love into her
ears.
I was just about to address her when somebody touched me on the
shoulder, and as I turned round in some surprise, I saw an ordinary-
looking man, who was neither young nor old, and who gazed at me sadly.
“I should like to speak to you,” he said.
I made a grimace, which he no doubt saw, for he added:
“It is a matter of importance.”
I got up, therefore, and followed him to the other end of the boat and
then he said:
“Monsieur, when winter comes, with its cold, wet and snowy weather, your
doctor says to you constantly: 'Keep your feet warm, guard against
chills, colds, bronchitis, rheumatism and pleurisy.'
“Then you are very careful, you wear flannel, a heavy greatcoat and
thick shoes, but all this does not prevent you from passing two months
in bed. But when spring returns, with its leaves and flowers, its warm,
soft breezes and its smell of the fields, all of which causes you vague
disquiet and causeless emotion, nobody says to you:
“'Monsieur, beware of love! It is lying in ambush everywhere; it is
watching for you at every corner; all its snares are laid, all its
weapons are sharpened, all its guiles are prepared! Beware of love!
Beware of love! It is more dangerous than brandy, bronchitis or
pleurisy! It never forgives and makes everybody commit irreparable
follies.'
“Yes, monsieur, I say that the French Government ought to put large
public notices on the walls, with these words: 'Return of spring. French
citizens, beware of love!' just as they put: 'Beware of paint:
“However, as the government will not do this, I must supply its place,
and I say to you: 'Beware of love!' for it is just going to seize you,
and it is my duty to inform you of it, just as in Russia they inform any
one that his nose is frozen.”
I was much astonished at this individual, and assuming a dignified
manner, I said:
“Really, monsieur, you appear to me to be interfering in a matter which
is no concern of yours.”
He made an abrupt movement and replied:
“Ah! monsieur, monsieur! If I see that a man is in danger of being
drowned at a dangerous spot, ought I to let him perish? So just listen
to my story and you will see why I ventured to speak to you like this.
“It was about this time last year that it occurred. But, first of all, I
must tell you that I am a clerk in the Admiralty, where our chiefs, the
commissioners, take their gold lace as quill-driving officials
seriously, and treat us like forecastle men on board a ship. Well, from
my office I could see a small bit of blue sky and the swallows, and I
felt inclined to dance among my portfolios.
“My yearning for freedom grew so intense that, in spite of my
repugnance, I went to see my chief, a short, bad-tempered man, who was
always in a rage. When I told him that I was not well, he looked at me
and said: 'I do not believe it, monsieur, but be off with you! Do you
think that any office can go on with clerks like you?' I started at once
and went down the Seine. It was a day like this, and I took the Mouche,
to go as far as Saint Cloud. Ah! what a good thing it would have been if
my chief had refused me permission to leave the office that day!
“I seemed to myself to expand in the sun. I loved everything—the
steamer, the river, the trees, the houses and my fellow-passengers. I
felt inclined to kiss something, no matter what; it was love, laying its
snare. Presently, at the Trocadero, a girl, with a small parcel in her
hand, came on board and sat down opposite me. She was decidedly pretty,
but it is surprising, monsieur, how much prettier women seem to us when
the day is fine at the beginning of the spring. Then they have an
intoxicating charm, something quite peculiar about them. It is just like
drinking wine after cheese.
“I looked at her and she also looked at me, but only occasionally, as
that girl did at you, just now; but at last, by dint of looking at each
other constantly, it seemed to me that we knew each other well enough to
enter into conversation, and I spoke to her and she replied. She was
decidedly pretty and nice and she intoxicated me, monsieur!
“She got out at Saint-Cloud, and I followed her. She went and delivered
her parcel, and when she returned the boat had just started. I walked by
her side, and the warmth of the 'air made us both sigh. 'It would be
very nice in the woods,' I said. 'Indeed, it would!' she replied. 'Shall
we go there for a walk, mademoiselie?'
“She gave me a quick upward look, as if to see exactly what I was like,
and then, after a little hesitation, she accepted my proposal, and soon
we were there, walking side by side. Under the foliage, which was still
rather scanty, the tall, thick, bright green grass was inundated by the
sun, and the air was full of insects that were also making love to one
another, and birds were singing in all directions. My companion began to
jump and to run, intoxicated by the air and the smell of the country,
and I ran and jumped, following her example. How silly we are at times,
monsieur!
“Then she sang unrestrainedly a thousand things, opera airs and the song
of Musette! The song of Musette! How poetical it seemed to me, then! I
almost cried over it. Ah! Those silly songs make us lose our heads; and,
believe me, never marry a woman who sings in the country, especially if
she sings the song of Musette!
“She soon grew tired, and sat down on a grassy slope, and I sat at her
feet and took her hands, her little hands, that were so marked with the
needle, and that filled me with emotion. I said to myself:
“'These are the sacred marks of toil.' Oh! monsieur, do you know what
those sacred marks of toil mean? They mean all the gossip of the
workroom, the whispered scandal, the mind soiled by all the filth that
is talked; they mean lost chastity, foolish chatter, all the
wretchedness of their everyday life, all the narrowness of ideas which
belongs to women of the lower orders, combined to their fullest extent
in the girl whose fingers bear the sacred marks of toil.
“Then we looked into each other's eyes for a long while. Oh! what power
a woman's eye has! How it agitates us, how it invades our very being,
takes possession of us, and dominates us! How profound it seems, how
full of infinite promises! People call that looking into each other's
souls! Oh! monsieur, what humbug! If we could see into each other's
souls, we should be more careful of what we did. However, I was
captivated and was crazy about her and tried to take her into my arms,
but she said: 'Paws off!'. Then I knelt down and opened my heart to her
and poured out all the affection that was suffocating me. She seemed
surprised at my change of manner and gave me a sidelong glance, as if to
say, 'Ah! so that is the way women make a fool of you, old fellow! Very
well, we will see.'
“In love, monsieur, we are always novices, and women artful dealers.
“No doubt I could have had her, and I saw my own stupidity later, but
what I wanted was not a woman's person, it was love, it was the ideal. I
was sentimental, when I ought to have been using my time to a better
purpose.
“As soon as she had had enough of my declarations of affection, she got
up, and we returned to Saint-Cloud, and I did not leave her until we got
to Paris; but she had looked so sad as we were returning, that at last I
asked her what was the matter. 'I am thinking,' she replied, 'that this
has been one of those days of which we have but few in life.' My heart
beat so that it felt as if it would break my ribs.
“I saw her on the following Sunday, and the next Sunday, and every
Sunday. I took her to Bougival, Saint-Germain, Maisons-Lafitte, Poissy;
to every suburban resort of lovers.
“The little jade, in turn, pretended to love me, until, at last, I
altogether lost my head, and three months later I married her.
“What can you expect, monsieur, when a man is a clerk, living alone,
without any relations, or any one to advise him? One says to one's self:
'How sweet life would be with a wife!'
“And so one gets married and she calls you names from morning till
night, understands nothing, knows nothing, chatters continually, sings
the song of Musette at the, top of her voice (oh! that song of Musette,
how tired one gets of it!); quarrels with the charcoal dealer, tells the
janitor all her domestic details, confides all the secrets of her
bedroom to the neighbor's servant, discusses her husband with the
tradespeople and has her head so stuffed with stupid stories, with
idiotic superstitions, with extraordinary ideas and monstrous
prejudices, that I—for what I have said applies more particularly to
myself—shed tears of discouragement every time I talk to her.”
He stopped, as he was rather out of breath and very much moved, and I
looked at him, for I felt pity for this poor, artless devil, and I was
just going to give him some sort of answer, when the boat stopped. We
were at Saint-Cloud.
The little woman who had so taken my fancy rose from her seat in order
to land. She passed close to me, and gave me a sidelong glance and a
furtive smile, one of those smiles that drive you wild. Then she jumped
on the landing-stage. I sprang forward to follow her, but my neighbor
laid hold of my arm. I shook myself loose, however, whereupon he seized
the skirt of my coat and pulled me back, exclaiming: “You shall not go!
you shall not go!” in such a loud voice that everybody turned round and
laughed, and I remained standing motionless and furious, but without
venturing to face scandal and ridicule, and the steamboat started.
The little woman on the landing-stage looked at me as I went off with an
air of disappointment, while my persecutor rubbed his hands and
whispered to me:
“You must acknowledge that I have done you a great service.”
A QUEER NIGHT IN PARIS
Mattre Saval, notary at Vernon, was passionately fond of music. Although
still young he was already bald; he was always carefully shaven, was
somewhat corpulent as was suitable, and wore a gold pince-nez instead of
spectacles. He was active, gallant and cheerful and was considered quite
an artist in Vernon. He played the piano and the violin, and gave
musicals where the new operas were interpreted.
He had even what is called a bit of a voice; nothing but a bit, very
little bit of a voice; but he managed it with so much taste that cries
of “Bravo!” “Exquisite!” “Surprising!” “Adorable!” issued from every
throat as soon as he had murmured the last note.
He subscribed to a music publishing house in Paris, and they sent him
the latest music, and from time to time he sent invitations after this
fashion to the elite of the town:
“You are invited to be present on Monday evening at the house of M.
Saval, notary, Vernon, at the first rendering of 'Sais.'”
A few officers, gifted with good voices, formed the chorus. Two or three
lady amateurs also sang. The notary filled the part of leader of the
orchestra with so much correctness that the bandmaster of the 190th
regiment of the line said of him, one day, at the Cafe de l'Europe.
“Oh! M. Saval is a master. It is a great pity that he did not adopt the
career of an artist.”
When his name was mentioned in a drawing-room, there was always somebody
found to declare: “He is not an amateur; he is an artist, a genuine
artist.”
And two or three persons repeated, in a tone of profound conviction:
“Oh! yes, a genuine artist,” laying particular stress on the word
“genuine.”
Every time that a new work was interpreted at a big Parisian theatre M.
Saval paid a visit to the capital.
Now, last year, according to his custom, he went to hear Henri VIII. He
then took the express which arrives in Paris at 4:30 P.M., intending to
return by the 12:35 A.M. train, so as not to have to sleep at a hotel.
He had put on evening dress, a black coat and white tie, which he
concealed under his overcoat with the collar turned up.
As soon as he set foot on the Rue d'Amsterdam, he felt himself in quite
jovial mood. He said to himself:
“Decidedly, the air of Paris does not resemble any other air. It has in
it something indescribably stimulating, exciting, intoxicating, which
fills you with a strange longing to dance about and to do many other
things. As soon as I arrive here, it seems to me, all of a sudden, that
I have taken a bottle of champagne. What a life one can lead in this
city in the midst of artists! Happy are the elect, the great men who
make themselves a reputation in such a city! What an existence is
theirs!”
And he made plans; he would have liked to know some of these celebrated
men, to talk about them in Vernon, and to spend an evening with them
from time to time in Paris.
But suddenly an idea struck him. He had heard allusions to little cafes
in the outer boulevards at which well-known painters, men of letters,
and even musicians gathered, and he proceeded to go up to Montmartre at
a slow pace.
He had two hours before him. He wanted to look about him. He passed in
front of taverns frequented by belated bohemians, gazing at the
different faces, seeking to discover the artists. Finally, he came to
the sign of “The Dead Rat,” and, allured by the name, he entered.
Five or six women, with their elbows resting on the marble tables, were
talking in low tones about their love affairs, the quarrels of Lucie and
Hortense, and the scoundrelism of Octave. They were no longer young,
were too fat or too thin, tired out, used up. You could see that they
were almost bald; and they drank beer like men.
M. Saval sat down at some distance from them and waited, for the hour
for taking absinthe was at hand.
A tall young man soon came in and took a seat beside him. The landlady
called him M. “Romantin.” The notary quivered. Was this the Romantin who
had taken a medal at the last Salon?
The young man made a sign to the waiter.
“You will bring up my dinner at once, and then carry to my new studio,
15 Boulevard de Clichy, thirty bottles of beer, and the ham I ordered
this morning. We are going to have a housewarming.”
M. Saval immediately ordered dinner. Then, he took off his overcoat, so
that his dress suit and his white tie could be seen. His neighbor did
not seem to notice him. He had taken up a newspaper, and was reading it.
M. Saval glanced sideways at him, burning with the desire to speak to
him.
Two young men entered, in red vests and with peaked beards, in the
fashion of Henry III. They sat down opposite Romantin.
The first of the pair said:
“Is it for this evening?”
Romantin pressed his hand.
“I believe you, old chap, and everyone will be there. I have Bonnat,
Guillemet, Gervex, Beraud, Hebert, Duez, Clairin, and Jean-Paul Laurens.
It will be a stunning affair! And women, too! Wait till you see! Every
actress without exception—of course I mean, you know, all those who have
nothing to do this evening.”
The landlord of the establishment came across.
“Do you often have this housewarming?”
The painter replied:
“I believe you, every three months, each quarter.”
M. Saval could not restrain himself any longer, and in a hesitating
voice said:
“I beg your pardon for intruding on you, monsieur, but I heard your name
mentioned, and I would be very glad to know if you really are M.
Romantin, whose work in the last Salon I have so much admired?”
The painter answered:
“I am the very person, monsieur.”
The notary then paid the artist a very well-turned compliment, showing
that he was a man of culture.
The painter, gratified, thanked him politely in reply.
Then they chattered. Romantin returned to the subject of his house-
warming, going into details as to the magnificence of the forthcoming
entertainment.
M. Saval questioned him as to all the men he was going to receive,
adding:
“It would be an extraordinary piece of good fortune for a stranger to
meet at one time so many celebrities assembled in the studio of an
artist of your rank.”
Romantin, vanquished, replied:
“If it would be agreeable to you, come.”
M. Saval accepted the invitation with enthusiasm, reflecting:
“I shall have time enough to see Henri VIII.”
Both of them had finished their meal. The notary insisted on paying the
two bills, wishing to repay his neighbor's civilities. He also paid for
the drinks of the young fellows in red velvet; then he left the
establishment with the painter.
They stopped in front of a very long, low house, the first story having
the appearance of an interminable conservatory. Six studios stood in a
row with their fronts facing the boulevards.
Romantin was the first to enter, and, ascending the stairs, he opened a
door, and lighted a match and then a candle.
They found themselves in an immense apartment, the furniture of which
consisted of three chairs, two easels, and a few sketches standing on
the ground along the walls. M. Saval remained standing at the door
somewhat astonished.
The painter remarked:
“Here you are! we've got to the spot; but everything has yet to be
done.”
Then, examining the high, bare apartment, its ceiling disappearing in
the darkness, he said:
“We might make a great deal out of this studio.”
He walked round it, surveying it with the utmost attention, then went
on:
“I know someone who might easily give a helping hand. Women are
incomparable for hanging drapery. But I sent her to the country for to-
day in order to get her off my hands this evening. It is not that she
bores me, but she is too much lacking in the ways of good society. It
would be embarrassing to my guests.”
He reflected for a few seconds, and then added:
“She is a good girl, but not easy to deal with. If she knew that I was
holding a reception, she would tear out my eyes.”
M. Saval had not even moved; he did not understand.
The artist came over to him.
“Since I have invited you, you will assist me about something.”
The notary said emphatically:
“Make any use of me you please. I am at your disposal.”
Romantin took off his jacket.
“Well, citizen, to work!' We are first going to clean up.”
He went to the back of the easel, on which there was a canvas
representing a cat, and seized a very worn-out broom.
“I say! Just brush up while I look after the lighting.”
M. Saval took the broom, inspected it, and then began to sweep the floor
very awkwardly, raising a whirlwind of dust.
Romantin, disgusted, stopped him: “Deuce take it! you don't know how to
sweep the floor! Look at me!”
And he began to roll before him a heap of grayish sweepings, as if he
had done nothing else all his life. Then, he gave bark the broom to the
notary, who imitated him.
In five minutes, such a cloud of dust filled the studio that Rormantin
asked:
“Where are you? I can't see you any longer.”
M. Saval, who was coughing, came near to him. The painter said:
“How would you set about making a chandelier?”
The other, surprised, asked:
“What chandelier?”
“Why, a chandelier to light the room—a chandelier with wax-candles.”
The notary did not understand.
He answered: “I don't know.”
The painter began to jump about, cracking his fingers.
“Well, monseigneur, I have found out a way.”
Then he went on more calmly:
“Have you got five francs about you?”
M. Saval replied:
“Why, yes.”
The artist said: “Well! you'll go out and buy for me five francs' worth
of wax-candles while I go and see the cooper.”
And he pushed the notary in his evening coat into the street. At the end
of five minutes, they had returned, one of them with the wax-candles and
the other with the hoop of a cask. Then Romantin plunged his hand into a
cupboard, and drew forth twenty empty bottles, which he fixed in the
form of a crown around the hoop.
He then went downstairs to borrow a ladder from the janitress, after
having explained that he had made interest with the old woman by
painting the portrait of her cat, exhibited on the easel.
When he returned with the ladder, he said to M. Saval:
“Are you active?”
The other, without understanding, answered:
“Why, yes.”
“Well, you just climb up there, and fasten this chandelier for me to the
ring of the ceiling. Then, you put a wax-candle in each bottle, and
light it. I tell you I have a genius for lighting up. But off with your
coat, damn it! You are just like a Jeames.”
The door was opened brusquely. A woman appeared, her eyes flashing, and
remained standing on the threshold.
Romantin gazed at her with a look of terror.
She waited some seconds, crossing her arms over her breast, and then in
a shrill, vibrating, exasperated voice said:
“Ha! you dirty scoundrel, is this the way you leave me?”
Romantin made no reply. She went on:
“Ha! you scoundrel! You did a nice thing in parking me off to the
country. You'll soon see the way I'll settle your jollification. Yes,
I'm going to receive your friends.”
She grew warmer.
“I'm going to slap their faces with the bottles and the wax-candles——”
Romantin said in a soft tone:
“Mathilde——”
But she did not pay any attention to him; she went on:
“Wait a little, my fine fellow! wait a little!”
Romantin went over to her, and tried to take her by the hands.
“Mathilde——”
But she was now fairly under way; and on she went, emptying the vials of
her wrath with strong words and reproaches. They flowed out of her mouth
like, a stream sweeping a heap of filth along with it. The words pouring
forth seemed struggling for exit. She stuttered, stammered, yelled,
suddenly recovering her voice to cast forth an insult or a curse.
He seized her hands without her having noticed it. She did not seem to
see anything, so taken up was she in scolding and relieving her
feelings. And suddenly she began to weep. The tears flowed from her
eyes, but this did not stop her complaints. But her words were uttered
in a screaming falsetto voice with tears in it and interrupted by sobs.
She commenced afresh twice or three times, till she stopped as if
something were choking her, and at last she ceased with a regular flood
of tears.
Then he clasped her in his arms and kissed her hair, affected himself.
“Mathilde, my little Mathilde, listen. You must be reasonable. You know,
if I give a supper-party to my friends, it is to thank these gentlemen
for the medal I got at the Salon. I cannot receive women. You ought to
understand that. It is not the same with artists as with other people.”
She stammered, in the midst of her tears:
“Why didn't you tell me this?”
He replied:
“It was in order not to annoy you, not to give you pain. Listen, I'm
going to see you home. You will be very sensible, very nice; you will
remain quietly waiting for me in bed, and I'll come back as soon as it's
over.”
She murmured:
“Yes, but you will not begin over again?”
“No, I swear to you!”
He turned towards M. Saval, who had at last hooked on the chandelier:
“My dear friend, I am coming back in five minutes. If anyone arrives in
my absence, do the honors for me, will you not?”
And he carried off Mathilde, who kept drying her eyes with her
handkerchief as she went along.
Left to himself, M. Saval succeeded in putting everything around him in
order. Then he lighted the wax-candles, and waited.
He waited for a quarter of an hour, half an hour, an hour. Romantin did
not return. Then, suddenly there was a dreadful noise on the stairs, a
song shouted out in chorus by twenty mouths and a regular march like
that of a Prussian regiment. The whole house was shaken by the steady
tramp of feet. The door flew open, and a motley throng appeared—men and
women in file, two and two holding each other by the arm and stamping
their heels on the ground to mark time, advanced into the studio like a
snake uncoiling itself. They howled:
“Come, and let us all be merry, Pretty maids and soldiers gay!”
M. Saval, thunderstruck, remained standing in evening dress under the
chandelier. The procession of revellers caught sight of him, and uttered
a shout:
“A Jeames! A Jeames!”
And they began whirling round him, surrounding him with a circle of
vociferations. Then they took each other by the hand and went dancing
about madly.
He attempted to explain:
“Messieurs—messieurs—mesdames——”
But they did not listen to him. They whirled about, they jumped, they
brawled.
At last, the dancing ceased. M. Saval said:
“Gentlemen——”
A tall young fellow, fair-haired and bearded to the nose, interrupted
him:
“What's your name, my friend?”
The notary, quite scared, said:
“I am M. Saval.”
A voice exclaimed:
“You mean Baptiste.”
A woman said:
“Let the poor waiter alone! You'll end by making him get angry. He's
paid to wait on us, and not to be laughed at by us.”
Then, M. Saval noticed that each guest had brought his own provisions.
One held a bottle of wine, and the other a pie. This one had a loaf of
bread, and one a ham.
The tall, fair young fellow placed in his hands an enormous sausage, and
gave orders:
“Here, go and arrange the sideboard in the corner over there. Put the
bottles at the left and the provisions at the right.”
Saval, getting quite distracted, exclaimed: “But, messieurs, I am a
notary!”
There was a moment's silence and then a wild outburst of laughter. One
suspicious gentleman asked:
“How came you to be here?”
He explained, telling about his project of going to the opera, his
departure from Vernon, his arrival in Paris, and the way in which he had
spent the evening.
They sat around him to listen to him; they greeted him with words of
applause, and called him Scheherazade.
Romantin did not return. Other guests arrived. M. Saval was presented to
them so that he might begin his story over again. He declined; they
forced him to relate it. They seated and tied him on one of three chairs
between two women who kept constantly filling his glass. He drank; he
laughed; he talked; he sang, too. He tried to waltz with his chair, and
fell on the ground.
From that moment, he forgot everything. It seemed to him, however, that
they undressed him, put him to bed, and that he was nauseated.
When he awoke, it was broad daylight, and he lay stretched with his feet
against a cupboard, in a strange bed.
An old woman with a broom in her hand was glaring angrily at him. At
last, she said:
“Clear out, you blackguard! Clear out! What right has anyone to get
drunk like this?”
He sat up in bed, feeling very ill at ease. He asked:
“Where am I?”
“Where are you, you dirty scamp? You are drunk. Take your rotten carcass
out of here as quick as you can—and lose no time about it!”
He wanted to get up. He found that he was in no condition to do so. His
clothes had disappeared. He blurted out:
“Madame, I——Then he remembered. What was he to do? He asked:
“Did Monsieur Romantin come back?”
The doorkeeper shouted:
“Will you take your dirty carcass out of this, so that he at any rate
may not catch you here?”
M. Saval said, in a state of confusion:
“I haven't got my clothes; they have been taken away from me.”
He had to wait, to explain his situation, give notice to his friends,
and borrow some money to buy clothes. He did not leave Paris till
evening. And when people talk about music to him in his beautiful
drawing-room in Vernon, he declares with an air of authority that
painting is a very inferior art.
ORIGINAL SHORT STORIES, Vol. 6.
GUY DE MAUPASSANT ORIGINAL SHORT STORIES Translated by ALBERT M. C.
McMASTER, B.A. A. E. HENDERSON, B.A. MME. QUESADA and Others
VOLUME VI.
THAT COSTLY RIDE
The household lived frugally on the meager income derived from the
husband's insignificant appointments. Two children had been born of the
marriage, and the earlier condition of the strictest economy had become
one of quiet, concealed, shamefaced misery, the poverty of a noble
family—which in spite of misfortune never forgets its rank.
Hector de Gribelin had been educated in the provinces, under the
paternal roof, by an aged priest. His people were not rich, but they
managed to live and to keep up appearances.
At twenty years of age they tried to find him a position, and he entered
the Ministry of Marine as a clerk at sixty pounds a year. He foundered
on the rock of life like all those who have not been early prepared for
its rude struggles, who look at life through a mist, who do not know how
to protect themselves, whose special aptitudes and faculties have not
been developed from childhood, whose early training has not developed
the rough energy needed for the battle of life or furnished them with
tool or weapon.
His first three years of office work were a martyrdom.
He had, however, renewed the acquaintance of a few friends of his family
—elderly people, far behind the times, and poor like himself, who lived
in aristocratic streets, the gloomy thoroughfares of the Faubourg Saint-
Germain; and he had created a social circle for himself.
Strangers to modern life, humble yet proud, these needy aristocrats
lived in the upper stories of sleepy, old-world houses. From top to
bottom of their dwellings the tenants were titled, but money seemed just
as scarce on the ground floor as in the attics.
Their eternal prejudices, absorption in their rank, anxiety lest they
should lose caste, filled the minds and thoughts of these families once
so brilliant, now ruined by the idleness of the men of the family.
Hector de Gribelin met in this circle a young girl as well born and as
poor as himself and married her.
They had two children in four years.
For four years more the husband and wife, harassed by poverty, knew no
other distraction than the Sunday walk in the Champs-Elysees and a few
evenings at the theatre (amounting in all to one or two in the course of
the winter) which they owed to free passes presented by some comrade or
other.
But in the spring of the following year some overtime work was entrusted
to Hector de Gribelin by his chief, for which he received the large sum
of three hundred francs.
The day he brought the money home he said to his wife:
“My dear Henrietta, we must indulge in some sort of festivity—say an
outing for the children.”
And after a long discussion it was decided that they should go and lunch
one day in the country.
“Well,” cried Hector, “once will not break us, so we'll hire a wagonette
for you, the children and the maid. And I'll have a saddle horse; the
exercise will do me good.”
The whole week long they talked of nothing but the projected excursion.
Every evening, on his return from the office, Hector caught up his elder
son, put him astride his leg, and, making him bounce up and down as hard
as he could, said:
“That's how daddy will gallop next Sunday.”
And the youngster amused himself all day long by bestriding chairs,
dragging them round the room and shouting:
“This is daddy on horseback!”
The servant herself gazed at her master with awestruck eyes as she
thought of him riding alongside the carriage, and at meal-times she
listened with all her ears while he spoke of riding and recounted the
exploits of his youth, when he lived at home with his father. Oh, he had
learned in a good school, and once he felt his steed between his legs he
feared nothing—nothing whatever!
Rubbing his hands, he repeated gaily to his wife:
“If only they would give me a restive animal I should be all the better
pleased. You'll see how well I can ride; and if you like we'll come back
by the Champs-Elysees just as all the people are returning from the
Bois. As we shall make a good appearance, I shouldn't at all object to
meeting some one from the ministry. That is all that is necessary to
insure the respect of one's chiefs.”
On the day appointed the carriage and the riding horse arrived at the
same moment before the door. Hector went down immediately to examine his
mount. He had had straps sewn to his trousers and flourished in his hand
a whip he had bought the evening before.
He raised the horse's legs and felt them one after another, passed his
hand over the animal's neck, flank and hocks, opened his mouth, examined
his teeth, declared his age; and then, the whole household having
collected round him, he delivered a discourse on the horse in general
and the specimen before him in particular, pronouncing the latter
excellent in every respect.
When the rest of the party had taken their seats in the carriage he
examined the saddle-girth; then, putting his foot in the stirrup, he
sprang to the saddle. The animal began to curvet and nearly threw his
rider.
Hector, not altogether at his ease, tried to soothe him:
“Come, come, good horse, gently now!”
Then, when the horse had recovered his equanimity and the rider his
nerve, the latter asked:
“Are you ready?”
The occupants of the carriage replied with one voice:
“Yes.”
“Forward!” he commanded.
And the cavalcade set out.
All looks were centered on him. He trotted in the English style, rising
unnecessarily high in the saddle; looking at times as if he were
mounting into space. Sometimes he seemed on the point of falling forward
on the horse's mane; his eyes were fixed, his face drawn, his cheeks
pale.
His wife, holding one of the children on her knees, and the servant, who
was carrying the other, continually cried out:
“Look at papa! look at papa!”
And the two boys, intoxicated by the motion of the carriage, by their
delight and by the keen air, uttered shrill cries. The horse, frightened
by the noise they made, started off at a gallop, and while Hector was
trying to control his steed his hat fell off, and the driver had to get
down and pick it up. When the equestrian had recovered it he called to
his wife from a distance:
“Don't let the children shout like that! They'll make the horse bolt!”
They lunched on the grass in the Vesinet woods, having brought
provisions with them in the carriage.
Although the driver was looking after the three horses, Hector rose
every minute to see if his own lacked anything; he patted him on the
neck and fed him with bread, cakes and sugar.
“He's an unequal trotter,” he declared. “He certainly shook me up a
little at first, but, as you saw, I soon got used to it. He knows his
master now and won't give any more trouble.”
As had been decided, they returned by the Champs-Elysees.
That spacious thoroughfare literally swarmed with vehicles of every
kind, and on the sidewalks the pedestrians were so numerous that they
looked like two indeterminate black ribbons unfurling their length from
the Arc de Triomphe to the Place de la Concorde. A flood of sunlight
played on this gay scene, making the varnish of the carriages, the steel
of the harness and the handles of the carriage doors shine with dazzling
brilliancy.
An intoxication of life and motion seemed to have invaded this
assemblage of human beings, carriages and horses. In the distance the
outlines of the Obelisk could be discerned in a cloud of golden vapor.
As soon as Hector's horse had passed the Arc de Triomphe he became
suddenly imbued with fresh energy, and, realizing that his stable was
not far off, began to trot rapidly through the maze of wheels, despite
all his rider's efforts to restrain him.
The carriage was now far behind. When the horse arrived opposite the
Palais de l'Industrie he saw a clear field before him, and, turning to
the right, set off at a gallop.
An old woman wearing an apron was crossing the road in leisurely
fashion. She happened to be just in Hector's way as he arrived on the
scene riding at full speed. Powerless to control his mount, he shouted
at the top of his voice:
“Hi! Look out there! Hi!”
She must have been deaf, for she continued peacefully on her way until
the awful moment when, struck by the horse's chest as by a locomotive
under full steam, she rolled ten paces off, turning three somersaults on
the way.
Voices yelled:
“Stop him!”
Hector, frantic with terror, clung to the horse's mane and shouted:
“Help! help!”
A terrible jolt hurled him, as if shot from a gun, over his horse's ears
and cast him into the arms of a policeman who was running up to stop
him.
In the space of a second a furious, gesticulating, vociferating group
had gathered round him. An old gentleman with a white mustache, wearing
a large round decoration, seemed particularly exasperated. He repeated:
“Confound it! When a man is as awkward as all that he should remain at
home and not come killing people in the streets, if he doesn't know how
to handle a horse.”
Four men arrived on the scene, carrying the old woman. She appeared to
be dead. Her skin was like parchment, her cap on one side and she was
covered with dust.
“Take her to a druggist's,” ordered the old gentleman, “and let us go to
the commissary of police.”
Hector started on his way with a policeman on either side of him, a
third was leading his horse. A crowd followed them—and suddenly the
wagonette appeared in sight. His wife alighted in consternation, the
servant lost her head, the children whimpered. He explained that he
would soon be at home, that he had knocked a woman down and that there
was not much the matter. And his family, distracted with anxiety, went
on their way.
When they arrived before the commissary the explanation took place in
few words. He gave his name—Hector de Gribelin, employed at the Ministry
of Marine; and then they awaited news of the injured woman. A policeman
who had been sent to obtain information returned, saying that she had
recovered consciousness, but was complaining of frightful internal pain.
She was a charwoman, sixty-five years of age, named Madame Simon.
When he heard that she was not dead Hector regained hope and promised to
defray her doctor's bill. Then he hastened to the druggist's. The door
way was thronged; the injured woman, huddled in an armchair, was
groaning. Her arms hung at her sides, her face was drawn. Two doctors
were still engaged in examining her. No bones were broken, but they
feared some internal lesion.
Hector addressed her:
“Do you suffer much?”
“Oh, yes!”
“Where is the pain?”
“I feel as if my stomach were on fire.”
A doctor approached.
“Are you the gentleman who caused the accident?”
“I am.”
“This woman ought to be sent to a home. I know one where they would take
her at six francs a day. Would you like me to send her there?”
Hector was delighted at the idea, thanked him and returned home much
relieved.
His wife, dissolved in tears, was awaiting him. He reassured her.
“It's all right. This Madame Simon is better already and will be quite
well in two or three days. I have sent her to a home. It's all right.”
When he left his office the next day he went to inquire for Madame
Simon. He found her eating rich soup with an air of great satisfaction.
“Well?” said he.
“Oh, sir,” she replied, “I'm just the same. I feel sort of crushed—not a
bit better.”
The doctor declared they must wait and see; some complication or other
might arise.
Hector waited three days, then he returned. The old woman, fresh-faced
and clear-eyed, began to whine when she saw him:
“I can't move, sir; I can't move a bit. I shall be like this for the
rest of my days.”
A shudder passed through Hector's frame. He asked for the doctor, who
merely shrugged his shoulders and said:
“What can I do? I can't tell what's wrong with her. She shrieks when
they try to raise her. They can't even move her chair from one place to
another without her uttering the most distressing cries. I am bound to
believe what she tells me; I can't look into her inside. So long as I
have no chance of seeing her walk I am not justified in supposing her to
be telling lies about herself.”
The old woman listened, motionless, a malicious gleam in her eyes.
A week passed, then a fortnight, then a month. Madame Simon did not
leave her armchair. She ate from morning to night, grew fat, chatted
gaily with the other patients and seemed to enjoy her immobility as if
it were the rest to which she was entitled after fifty years of going up
and down stairs, of turning mattresses, of carrying coal from one story
to another, of sweeping and dusting.
Hector, at his wits' end, came to see her every day. Every day he found
her calm and serene, declaring:
“I can't move, sir; I shall never be able to move again.”
Every evening Madame de Gribelin, devoured with anxiety, said:
“How is Madame Simon?”
And every time he replied with a resignation born of despair:
“Just the same; no change whatever.”
They dismissed the servant, whose wages they could no longer afford.
They economized more rigidly than ever. The whole of the extra pay had
been swallowed up.
Then Hector summoned four noted doctors, who met in consultation over
the old woman. She let them examine her, feel her, sound her, watching
them the while with a cunning eye.
“We must make her walk,” said one.
“But, sirs, I can't!” she cried. “I can't move!”
Then they took hold of her, raised her and dragged her a short distance,
but she slipped from their grasp and fell to the floor, groaning and
giving vent to such heartrending cries that they carried her back to her
seat with infinite care and precaution.
They pronounced a guarded opinion—agreeing, however, that work was an
impossibility to her.
And when Hector brought this news to his wife she sank on a chair,
murmuring:
“It would be better to bring her here; it would cost us less.”
He started in amazement.
“Here? In our own house? How can you think of such a thing?”
But she, resigned now to anything, replied with tears in her eyes:
“But what can we do, my love? It's not my fault!”
USELESS BEAUTY I
About half-past five one afternoon at the end of June when the sun was
shining warm and bright into the large courtyard, a very elegant
victoria with two beautiful black horses drew up in front of the
mansion.
The Comtesse de Mascaret came down the steps just as her husband, who
was coming home, appeared in the carriage entrance. He stopped for a few
moments to look at his wife and turned rather pale. The countess was
very beautiful, graceful and distinguished looking, with her long oval
face, her complexion like yellow ivory, her large gray eyes and her
black hair; and she got into her carriage without looking at him,
without even seeming to have noticed him, with such a particularly high-
bred air, that the furious jealousy by which he had been devoured for so
long again gnawed at his heart. He went up to her and said: “You are
going for a drive?”
She merely replied disdainfully: “You see I am!”
“In the Bois de Boulogne?”
“Most probably.”
“May I come with you?”
“The carriage belongs to you.”
Without being surprised at the tone in which she answered him, he got in
and sat down by his wife's side and said: “Bois de Boulogne.” The
footman jumped up beside the coachman, and the horses as usual pranced
and tossed their heads until they were in the street. Husband and wife
sat side by side without speaking. He was thinking how to begin a
conversation, but she maintained such an obstinately hard look that he
did not venture to make the attempt. At last, however, he cunningly,
accidentally as it were, touched the countess' gloved hand with his own,
but she drew her arm away with a movement which was so expressive of
disgust that he remained thoughtful, in spite of his usual authoritative
and despotic character, and he said: “Gabrielle!”
“What do you want?”
“I think you are looking adorable.”
She did not reply, but remained lying back in the carriage, looking like
an irritated queen. By that time they were driving up the Champs
Elysees, toward the Arc de Triomphe. That immense monument, at the end
of the long avenue, raised its colossal arch against the red sky and the
sun seemed to be descending on it, showering fiery dust on it from the
sky.
The stream of carriages, with dashes of sunlight reflected in the silver
trappings of the harness and the glass of the lamps, flowed on in a
double current toward the town and toward the Bois, and the Comte de
Mascaret continued: “My dear Gabrielle!”
Unable to control herself any longer, she replied in an exasperated
voice: “Oh! do leave me in peace, pray! I am not even allowed to have my
carriage to myself now.” He pretended not to hear her and continued:
“You never have looked so pretty as you do to-day.”
Her patience had come to an end, and she replied with irrepressible
anger: “You are wrong to notice it, for I swear to you that I will never
have anything to do with you in that way again.”
The count was decidedly stupefied and upset, and, his violent nature
gaining the upper hand, he exclaimed: “What do you mean by that?” in a
tone that betrayed rather the brutal master than the lover. She replied
in a low voice, so that the servants might not hear amid the deafening
noise of the wheels: “Ah! What do I mean by that? What do I mean by
that? Now I recognize you again! Do you want me to tell everything?”
“Yes.”
“Everything that has weighed on my heart since I have been the victim of
your terrible selfishness?”
He had grown red with surprise and anger and he growled between his
closed teeth: “Yes, tell me everything.”
He was a tall, broad-shouldered man, with a big red beard, a handsome
man, a nobleman, a man of the world, who passed as a perfect husband and
an excellent father, and now, for the first time since they had started,
she turned toward him and looked him full in the face: “Ah! You will
hear some disagreeable things, but you must know that I am prepared for
everything, that I fear nothing, and you less than any one to-day.”
He also was looking into her eyes and was already shaking with rage as
he said in a low voice: “You are mad.”
“No, but I will no longer be the victim of the hateful penalty of
maternity, which you have inflicted on me for eleven years! I wish to
take my place in society as I have the right to do, as all women have
the right to do.”
He suddenly grew pale again and stammered: “I do not understand you.”
“Oh! yes; you understand me well enough. It is now three months since I
had my last child, and as I am still very beautiful, and as, in spite of
all your efforts you cannot spoil my figure, as you just now perceived,
when you saw me on the doorstep, you think it is time that I should
think of having another child.”
“But you are talking nonsense!”
“No, I am not, I am thirty, and I have had seven children, and we have
been married eleven years, and you hope that this will go on for ten
years longer, after which you will leave off being jealous.”
He seized her arm and squeezed it, saying: “I will not allow you to talk
to me like that much longer.”
“And I shall talk to you till the end, until I have finished all I have
to say to you, and if you try to prevent me, I shall raise my voice so
that the two servants, who are on the box, may hear. I only allowed you
to come with me for that object, for I have these witnesses who will
oblige you to listen to me and to contain yourself, so now pay attention
to what I say. I have always felt an antipathy to you, and I have always
let you see it, for I have never lied, monsieur. You married me in spite
of myself; you forced my parents, who were in embarrassed circumstances,
to give me to you, because you were rich, and they obliged me to marry
you in spite of my tears.
“So you bought me, and as soon as I was in your power, as soon as I had
become your companion, ready to attach myself to you, to forget your
coercive and threatening proceedings, in order that I might only
remember that I ought to be a devoted wife and to love you as much as it
might be possible for me to love you, you became jealous, you, as no man
has ever been before, with the base, ignoble jealousy of a spy, which
was as degrading to you as it was to me. I had not been married eight
months when you suspected me of every perfidiousness, and you even told
me so. What a disgrace! And as you could not prevent me from being
beautiful and from pleasing people, from being called in drawing-rooms
and also in the newspapers one of the most beautiful women in Paris, you
tried everything you could think of to keep admirers from me, and you
hit upon the abominable idea of making me spend my life in a constant
state of motherhood, until the time should come when I should disgust
every man. Oh, do not deny it. I did not understand it for some time,
but then I guessed it. You even boasted about it to your sister, who
told me of it, for she is fond of me and was disgusted at your boorish
coarseness.
“Ah! Remember how you have behaved in the past! How for eleven years you
have compelled me to give up all society and simply be a mother to your
children. And then you would grow disgusted with me and I was sent into
the country, the family chateau, among fields and meadows. And when I
reappeared, fresh, pretty and unspoiled, still seductive and constantly
surrounded by admirers, hoping that at last I should live a little more
like a rich young society woman, you were seized with jealousy again,
and you began once more to persecute me with that infamous and hateful
desire from which you are suffering at this moment by my side. And it is
not the desire of possessing me—for I should never have refused myself
to you, but it is the wish to make me unsightly.
“And then that abominable and mysterious thing occurred which I was a
long time in understanding (but I grew sharp by dint of watching your
thoughts and actions): You attached yourself to your children with all
the security which they gave you while I bore them. You felt affection
for them, with all your aversion to me, and in spite of your ignoble
fears, which were momentarily allayed by your pleasure in seeing me lose
my symmetry.
“Oh! how often have I noticed that joy in you! I have seen it in your
eyes and guessed it. You loved your children as victories, and not
because they were of your own blood. They were victories over me, over
my youth, over my beauty, over my charms, over the compliments which
were paid me and over those that were whispered around me without being
paid to me personally. And you are proud of them, you make a parade of
them, you take them out for drives in your break in the Bois de Boulogne
and you give them donkey rides at Montmorency. You take them to
theatrical matinees so that you may be seen in the midst of them, so
that the people may say: 'What a kind father' and that it may be
repeated——”
He had seized her wrist with savage brutality, and he squeezed it so
violently that she was quiet and nearly cried out with the pain and he
said to her in a whisper:
“I love my children, do you hear? What you have just told me is
disgraceful in a mother. But you belong to me; I am master—your master—I
can exact from you what I like and when I like—and I have the law-on my
side.”
He was trying to crush her fingers in the strong grip of his large,
muscular hand, and she, livid with pain, tried in vain to free them from
that vise which was crushing them. The agony made her breathe hard and
the tears came into her eyes. “You see that I am the master and the
stronger,” he said. When he somewhat loosened his grip, she asked him:
“Do you think that I am a religious woman?”
He was surprised and stammered “Yes.”
“Do you think that I could lie if I swore to the truth of anything to
you before an altar on which Christ's body is?”
“No.”
“Will you go with me to some church?”
“What for?”
“You shall see. Will you?”
“If you absolutely wish it, yes.”
She raised her voice and said: “Philippe!” And the coachman, bending
down a little, without taking his eyes from his horses, seemed to turn
his ear alone toward his mistress, who continued: “Drive to St.
Philippe-du-Roule.” And the victoria, which had reached the entrance of
the Bois de Boulogne returned to Paris.
Husband and wife did not exchange a word further during the drive, and
when the carriage stopped before the church Madame de Mascaret jumped
out and entered it, followed by the count, a few yards distant. She
went, without stopping, as far as the choir-screen, and falling on her
knees at a chair, she buried her face in her hands. She prayed for a
long time, and he, standing behind her could see that she was crying.
She wept noiselessly, as women weep when they are in great, poignant
grief. There was a kind of undulation in her body, which ended in a
little sob, which was hidden and stifled by her fingers.
But the Comte de Mascaret thought that the situation was lasting too
long, and he touched her on the shoulder. That contact recalled her to
herself, as if she had been burned, and getting up, she looked straight
into his eyes. “This is what I have to say to you. I am afraid of
nothing, whatever you may do to me. You may kill me if you like. One of
your children is not yours, and one only; that I swear to you before
God, who hears me here. That was the only revenge that was possible for
me in return for all your abominable masculine tyrannies, in return for
the penal servitude of childbearing to which you have condemned me. Who
was my lover? That you never will know! You may suspect every one, but
you never will find out. I gave myself to him, without love and without
pleasure, only for the sake of betraying you, and he also made me a
mother. Which is the child? That also you never will know. I have seven;
try to find out! I intended to tell you this later, for one has not
avenged oneself on a man by deceiving him, unless he knows it. You have
driven me to confess it today. I have now finished.”
She hurried through the church toward the open door, expecting to hear
behind her the quick step: of her husband whom she had defied and to be
knocked to the ground by a blow of his fist, but she heard nothing and
reached her carriage. She jumped into it at a bound, overwhelmed with
anguish and breathless with fear. So she called out to the coachman:
“Home!” and the horses set off at a quick trot.
II
The Comtesse de Mascaret was waiting in her room for dinner time as a
criminal sentenced to death awaits the hour of his execution. What was
her husband going to do? Had he come home? Despotic, passionate, ready
for any violence as he was, what was he meditating, what had he made up
his mind to do? There was no sound in the house, and every moment she
looked at the clock. Her lady's maid had come and dressed her for the
evening and had then left the room again. Eight o'clock struck and
almost at the same moment there were two knocks at the door, and the
butler came in and announced dinner.
“Has the count come in?”
“Yes, Madame la Comtesse. He is in the diningroom.”
For a little moment she felt inclined to arm herself with a small
revolver which she had bought some time before, foreseeing the tragedy
which was being rehearsed in her heart. But she remembered that all the
children would be there, and she took nothing except a bottle of
smelling salts. He rose somewhat ceremoniously from his chair. They
exchanged a slight bow and sat down. The three boys with their tutor,
Abbe Martin, were on her right and the three girls, with Miss Smith,
their English governess, were on her left. The youngest child, who was
only three months old, remained upstairs with his nurse.
The abbe said grace as usual when there was no company, for the children
did not come down to dinner when guests were present. Then they began
dinner. The countess, suffering from emotion, which she had not
calculated upon, remained with her eyes cast down, while the count
scrutinized now the three boys and now the three girls with an
uncertain, unhappy expression, which travelled from one to the other.
Suddenly pushing his wineglass from him, it broke, and the wine was
spilt on the tablecloth, and at the slight noise caused by this little
accident the countess started up from her chair; and for the first time
they looked at each other. Then, in spite of themselves, in spite of the
irritation of their nerves caused by every glance, they continued to
exchange looks, rapid as pistol shots.
The abbe, who felt that there was some cause for embarrassment which he
could not divine, attempted to begin a conversation and tried various
subjects, but his useless efforts gave rise to no ideas and did not
bring out a word. The countess, with feminine tact and obeying her
instincts of a woman of the world, attempted to answer him two or three
times, but in vain. She could not find words, in the perplexity of her
mind, and her own voice almost frightened her in the silence of the
large room, where nothing was heard except the slight sound of plates
and knives and forks.
Suddenly her husband said to her, bending forward: “Here, amid your
children, will you swear to me that what you told me just now is true?”
The hatred which was fermenting in her veins suddenly roused her, and
replying to that question with the same firmness with which she had
replied to his looks, she raised both her hands, the right pointing
toward the boys and the left toward the girls, and said in a firm,
resolute voice and without any hesitation: “On the head of my children,
I swear that I have told you the truth.”
He got up and throwing his table napkin on the table with a movement of
exasperation, he turned round and flung his chair against the wall, and
then went out without another word, while she, uttering a deep sigh, as
if after a first victory, went on in a calm voice: “You must not pay any
attention to what your father has just said, my darlings; he was very
much upset a short time ago, but he will be all right again in a few
days.”
Then she talked with the abbe and Miss Smith and had tender, pretty
words for all her children, those sweet, tender mother's ways which
unfold little hearts.
When dinner was over she went into the drawing-room, all her children
following her. She made the elder ones chatter, and when their bedtime
came she kissed them for a long time and then went alone into her room.
She waited, for she had no doubt that the count would come, and she made
up her mind then, as her children were not with her, to protect herself
as a woman of the world as she would protect her life, and in the pocket
of her dress she put the little loaded revolver which she had bought a
few days previously. The hours went by, the hours struck, and every
sound was hushed in the house. Only the cabs, continued to rumble
through the streets, but their noise was only heard vaguely through the
shuttered and curtained windows.
She waited, full of nervous energy, without any fear of him now, ready
for anything, and almost triumphant, for she had found means of
torturing him continually during every moment of his life.
But the first gleam of dawn came in through the fringe at the bottom of
her curtain without his having come into her room, and then she awoke to
the fact, with much amazement, that he was not coming. Having locked and
bolted her door, for greater security, she went to bed at last and
remained there, with her eyes open, thinking and barely understanding it
all, without being able to guess what he was going to do.
When her maid brought her tea she at the same time handed her a letter
from her husband. He told her that he was going to undertake a longish
journey and in a postscript added that his lawyer would provide her with
any sums of money she might require for all her expenses.
III
It was at the opera, between two acts of “Robert the Devil.” In the
stalls the men were standing up, with their hats on, their waistcoats
cut very low so as to show a large amount of white shirt front, in which
gold and jewelled studs glistened, and were looking at the boxes full of
ladies in low dresses covered with diamonds and pearls, who were
expanding like flowers in that illuminated hothouse, where the beauty of
their faces and the whiteness of their shoulders seemed to bloom in
order to be gazed at, amid the sound of the music and of human voices.
Two friends, with their backs to the orchestra, were scanning those rows
of elegance, that exhibition of real or false charms, of jewels, of
luxury and of pretension which displayed itself in all parts of the
Grand Theatre, and one of them, Roger de Salnis, said to his companion,
Bernard Grandin:
“Just look how beautiful the Comtesse de Mascaret still is.”
The older man in turn looked through his opera glasses at a tall lady in
a box opposite. She appeared to be still very young, and her striking
beauty seemed to attract all eyes in every corner of the house. Her pale
complexion, of an ivory tint, gave her the appearance of a statue, while
a small diamond coronet glistened on her black hair like a streak of
light.
When he had looked at her for some time, Bernard Grandin replied with a
jocular accent of sincere conviction: “You may well call her beautiful!”
“How old do you think she is?”
“Wait a moment. I can tell you exactly, for I have known her since she
was a child and I saw her make her debut into society when she was quite
a girl. She is—she is—thirty—thirty-six.”
“Impossible!”
“I am sure of it.”
“She looks twenty-five.”
“She has had seven children.”
“It is incredible.”
“And what is more, they are all seven alive, as she is a very good
mother. I occasionally go to the house, which is a very quiet and
pleasant one, where one may see the phenomenon of the family in the
midst of society.”
“How very strange! And have there never been any reports about her?”
“Never.”
“But what about her husband? He is peculiar, is he not?”
“Yes and no. Very likely there has been a little drama between them, one
of those little domestic dramas which one suspects, never finds out
exactly, but guesses at pretty closely.”
“What is it?”
“I do not know anything about it. Mascaret leads a very fast life now,
after being a model husband. As long as he remained a good spouse he had
a shocking temper, was crabbed and easily took offence, but since he has
been leading his present wild life he has become quite different, But
one might surmise that he has some trouble, a worm gnawing somewhere,
for he has aged very much.”
Thereupon the two friends talked philosophically for some minutes about
the secret, unknowable troubles which differences of character or
perhaps physical antipathies, which were not perceived at first, give
rise to in families, and then Roger de Salnis, who was still looking at
Madame de Mascaret through his opera glasses, said: “It is almost
incredible that that woman can have had seven children!”
“Yes, in eleven years; after which, when she was thirty, she refused to
have any more, in order to take her place in society, which she seems
likely to do for many years.”
“Poor women!”
“Why do you pity them?”
“Why? Ah! my dear fellow, just consider! Eleven years in a condition of
motherhood for such a woman! What a hell! All her youth, all her beauty,
every hope of success, every poetical ideal of a brilliant life
sacrificed to that abominable law of reproduction which turns the normal
woman into a mere machine for bringing children into the world.”
“What would you have? It is only Nature!”
“Yes, but I say that Nature is our enemy, that we must always fight
against Nature, for she is continually bringing us back to an animal
state. You may be sure that God has not put anything on this earth that
is clean, pretty, elegant or accessory to our ideal; the human brain has
done it. It is man who has introduced a little grace, beauty, unknown
charm and mystery into creation by singing about it, interpreting it, by
admiring it as a poet, idealizing it as an artist and by explaining it
through science, doubtless making mistakes, but finding ingenious
reasons, hidden grace and beauty, unknown charm and mystery in the
various phenomena of Nature. God created only coarse beings, full of the
germs of disease, who, after a few years of bestial enjoyment, grow old
and infirm, with all the ugliness and all the want of power of human
decrepitude. He seems to have made them only in order that they may
reproduce their species in an ignoble manner and then die like ephemeral
insects. I said reproduce their species in an ignoble manner and I
adhere to that expression. What is there as a matter of fact more
ignoble and more repugnant than that act of reproduction of living
beings, against which all delicate minds always have revolted and always
will revolt? Since all the organs which have been invented by this
economical and malicious Creator serve two purposes, why did He not
choose another method of performing that sacred mission, which is the
noblest and the most exalted of all human functions? The mouth, which
nourishes the body by means of material food, also diffuses abroad
speech and thought. Our flesh renews itself of its own accord, while we
are thinking about it. The olfactory organs, through which the vital air
reaches the lungs, communicate all the perfumes of the world to the
brain: the smell of flowers, of woods, of trees, of the sea. The ear,
which enables us to communicate with our fellow men, has also allowed us
to invent music, to create dreams, happiness, infinite and even physical
pleasure by means of sound! But one might say that the cynical and
cunning Creator wished to prohibit man from ever ennobling and
idealizing his intercourse with women. Nevertheless man has found love,
which is not a bad reply to that sly Deity, and he has adorned it with
so much poetry that woman often forgets the sensual part of it. Those
among us who are unable to deceive themselves have invented vice and
refined debauchery, which is another way of laughing at God and paying
homage, immodest homage, to beauty.
“But the normal man begets children just like an animal coupled with
another by law.
“Look at that woman! Is it not abominable to think that such a jewel,
such a pearl, born to be beautiful, admired, feted and adored, has spent
eleven years of her life in providing heirs for the Comte de Mascaret?”
Bernard Grandin replied with a laugh: “There is a great deal of truth in
all that, but very few people would understand you.”
Salnis became more and more animated. “Do you know how I picture God
myself?” he said. “As an enormous, creative organ beyond our ken, who
scatters millions of worlds into space, just as one single fish would
deposit its spawn in the sea. He creates because it is His function as
God to do so, but He does not know what He is doing and is stupidly
prolific in His work and is ignorant of the combinations of all kinds
which are produced by His scattered germs. The human mind is a lucky
little local, passing accident which was totally unforeseen, and
condemned to disappear with this earth and to recommence perhaps here or
elsewhere the same or different with fresh combinations of eternally new
beginnings. We owe it to this little lapse of intelligence on His part
that we are very uncomfortable in this world which was not made for us,
which had not been prepared to receive us, to lodge and feed us or to
satisfy reflecting beings, and we owe it to Him also that we have to
struggle without ceasing against what are still called the designs of
Providence, when we are really refined and civilized beings.”
Grandin, who was listening to him attentively as he had long known the
surprising outbursts of his imagination, asked him: “Then you believe
that human thought is the spontaneous product of blind divine
generation?”
“Naturally! A fortuitous function of the nerve centres of our brain,
like the unforeseen chemical action due to new mixtures and similar also
to a charge of electricity, caused by friction or the unexpected
proximity of some substance, similar to all phenomena caused by the
infinite and fruitful fermentation of living matter.
“But, my dear fellow, the truth of this must be evident to any one who
looks about him. If the human mind, ordained by an omniscient Creator,
had been intended to be what it has become, exacting, inquiring,
agitated, tormented—so different from mere animal thought and
resignation—would the world which was created to receive the beings
which we now are have been this unpleasant little park for small game,
this salad patch, this wooded, rocky and spherical kitchen garden where
your improvident Providence had destined us to live naked, in caves or
under trees, nourished on the flesh of slaughtered animals, our
brethren, or on raw vegetables nourished by the sun and the rain?
“But it is sufficient to reflect for a moment, in order to understand
that this world was not made for such creatures as we are. Thought,
which is developed by a miracle in the nerves of the cells in our brain,
powerless, ignorant and confused as it is, and as it will always remain,
makes all of us who are intellectual beings eternal and wretched exiles
on earth.
“Look at this earth, as God has given it to those who inhabit it. Is it
not visibly and solely made, planted and covered with forests for the
sake of animals? What is there for us? Nothing. And for them,
everything, and they have nothing to do but to eat or go hunting and eat
each other, according to their instincts, for God never foresaw
gentleness and peaceable manners; He only foresaw the death of creatures
which were bent on destroying and devouring each other. Are not the
quail, the pigeon and the partridge the natural prey of the hawk? the
sheep, the stag and the ox that of the great flesh-eating animals,
rather than meat to be fattened and served up to us with truffles, which
have been unearthed by pigs for our special benefit?
“As to ourselves, the more civilized, intellectual and refined we are,
the more we ought to conquer and subdue that animal instinct, which
represents the will of God in us. And so, in order to mitigate our lot
as brutes, we have discovered and made everything, beginning with
houses, then exquisite food, sauces, sweetmeats, pastry, drink, stuffs,
clothes, ornaments, beds, mattresses, carriages, railways and
innumerable machines, besides arts and sciences, writing and poetry.
Every ideal comes from us as do all the amenities of life, in order to
make our existence as simple reproducers, for which divine Providence
solely intended us, less monotonous and less hard.
“Look at this theatre. Is there not here a human world created by us,
unforeseen and unknown to eternal fate, intelligible to our minds alone,
a sensual and intellectual distraction, which has been invented solely
by and for that discontented and restless little animal, man?
“Look at that woman, Madame de Mascaret. God intended her to live in a
cave, naked or wrapped up in the skins of wild animals. But is she not
better as she is? But, speaking of her, does any one know why and how
her brute of a husband, having such a companion by his side, and
especially after having been boorish enough to make her a mother seven
times, has suddenly left her, to run after bad women?”
Grandin replied: “Oh! my dear fellow, this is probably the only reason.
He found that raising a family was becoming too expensive, and from
reasons of domestic economy he has arrived at the same principles which
you lay down as a philosopher.”
Just then the curtain rose for the third act, and they turned round,
took off their hats and sat down.
IV
The Comte and Comtesse Mascaret were sitting side by side in the
carriage which was taking them home from the Opera, without speaking but
suddenly the husband said to his wife: “Gabrielle!”
“What do you want?”
“Don't you think that this has lasted long enough?”
“What?”
“The horrible punishment to which you have condemned me for the last six
years?”
“What do you want? I cannot help it.”
“Then tell me which of them it is.”
“Never.”
“Think that I can no longer see my children or feel them round me,
without having my heart burdened with this doubt. Tell me which of them
it is, and I swear that I will forgive you and treat it like the
others.”
“I have not the right to do so.”
“Do you not see that I can no longer endure this life, this thought
which is wearing me out, or this question which I am constantly asking
myself, this question which tortures me each time I look at them? It is
driving me mad.”
“Then you have suffered a great deal?” she said.
“Terribly. Should I, without that, have accepted the horror of living by
your side, and the still greater horror of feeling and knowing that
there is one among them whom I cannot recognize and who prevents me from
loving the others?”
“Then you have really suffered very much?” she repeated.
And he replied in a constrained and sorrowful voice:
“Yes, for do I not tell you every day that it is intolerable torture to
me? Should I have remained in that house, near you and them, if I did
not love them? Oh! You have behaved abominably toward me. All the
affection of my heart I have bestowed upon my children, and that you
know. I am for them a father of the olden time, as I was for you a
husband of one of the families of old, for by instinct I have remained a
natural man, a man of former days. Yes, I will confess it, you have made
me terribly jealous, because you are a woman of another race, of another
soul, with other requirements. Oh! I shall never forget the things you
said to me, but from that day I troubled myself no more about you. I did
not kill you, because then I should have had no means on earth of ever
discovering which of our—of your children is not mine. I have waited,
but I have suffered more than you would believe, for I can no longer
venture to love them, except, perhaps, the two eldest; I no longer
venture to look at them, to call them to me, to kiss them; I cannot take
them on my knee without asking myself, 'Can it be this one?' I have been
correct in my behavior toward you for six years, and even kind and
complaisant. Tell me the truth, and I swear that I will do nothing
unkind.”
He thought, in spite of the darkness of the carriage, that he could
perceive that she was moved, and feeling certain that she was going to
speak at last, he said: “I beg you, I beseech you to tell me” he said.
“I have been more guilty than you think perhaps,” she replied, “but I
could no longer endure that life of continual motherhood, and I had only
one means of driving you from me. I lied before God and I lied, with my
hand raised to my children's head, for I never have wronged you.”
He seized her arm in the darkness, and squeezing it as he had done on
that terrible day of their drive in the Bois de Boulogne, he stammered:
“Is that true?”
“It is true.”
But, wild with grief, he said with a groan: “I shall have fresh doubts
that will never end! When did you lie, the last time or now? How am I to
believe you at present? How can one believe a woman after that? I shall
never again know what I am to think. I would rather you had said to me,
'It is Jacques or it is Jeanne.'”
The carriage drove into the courtyard of the house and when it had drawn
up in front of the steps the count alighted first, as usual, and offered
his wife his arm to mount the stairs. As soon as they reached the first
floor he said: “May I speak to you for a few moments longer?” And she
replied, “I am quite willing.”
They went into a small drawing-room and a footman, in some surprise,
lighted the wax candles. As soon as he had left the room and they were
alone the count continued: “How am I to know the truth? I have begged
you a thousand times to speak, but you have remained dumb, impenetrable,
inflexible, inexorable, and now to-day you tell me that you have been
lying. For six years you have actually allowed me to believe such a
thing! No, you are lying now, I do not know why, but out of pity for me,
perhaps?”
She replied in a sincere and convincing manner: “If I had not done so, I
should have had four more children in the last six years!”
“Can a mother speak like that?”
“Oh!” she replied, “I do not feel that I am the mother of children who
never have been born; it is enough for me to be the mother of those that
I have and to love them with all my heart. I am a woman of the civilized
world, monsieur—we all are—and we are no longer, and we refuse to be,
mere females to restock the earth.”
She got up, but he seized her hands. “Only one word, Gabrielle. Tell me
the truth!”
“I have just told you. I never have dishonored you.”
He looked her full in the face, and how beautiful she was, with her gray
eyes, like the cold sky. In her dark hair sparkled the diamond coronet,
like a radiance. He suddenly felt, felt by a kind of intuition, that
this grand creature was not merely a being destined to perpetuate the
race, but the strange and mysterious product of all our complicated
desires which have been accumulating in us for centuries but which have
been turned aside from their primitive and divine object and have
wandered after a mystic, imperfectly perceived and intangible beauty.
There are some women like that, who blossom only for our dreams, adorned
with every poetical attribute of civilization, with that ideal luxury,
coquetry and esthetic charm which surround woman, a living statue that
brightens our life.
Her husband remained standing before her, stupefied at his tardy and
obscure discovery, confusedly hitting on the cause of his former
jealousy and understanding it all very imperfectly, and at last he said:
“I believe you, for I feel at this moment that you are not lying, and
before I really thought that you were.”
She put out her hand to him: “We are friends then?”
He took her hand and kissed it and replied: “We are friends. Thank you,
Gabrielle.”
Then he went out, still looking at her, and surprised that she was still
so beautiful and feeling a strange emotion arising in him.
THE FATHER I
He was a clerk in the Bureau of Public Education and lived at
Batignolles. He took the omnibus to Paris every morning and always sat
opposite a girl, with whom he fell in love.
She was employed in a shop and went in at the same time every day. She
was a little brunette, one of those girls whose eyes are so dark that
they look like black spots, on a complexion like ivory. He always saw
her coming at the corner of the same street, and she generally had to
run to catch the heavy vehicle, and sprang upon the steps before the
horses had quite stopped. Then she got inside, out of breath, and,
sitting down, looked round her.
The first time that he saw her, Francois Tessier liked the face. One
sometimes meets a woman whom one longs to clasp in one's arms without
even knowing her. That girl seemed to respond to some chord in his
being, to that sort of ideal of love which one cherishes in the depths
of the heart, without knowing it.
He looked at her intently, not meaning to be rude, and she became
embarrassed and blushed. He noticed it, and tried to turn away his eyes;
but he involuntarily fixed them upon her again every moment, although he
tried to look in another direction; and, in a few days, they seemed to
know each other without having spoken. He gave up his place to her when
the omnibus was full, and got outside, though he was very sorry to do
it. By this time she had got so far as to greet him with a little smile;
and, although she always dropped her eyes under his looks, which she
felt were too ardent, yet she did not appear offended at being looked at
in such a manner.
They ended by speaking. A kind of rapid friendship had become
established between them, a daily freemasonry of half an hour, and that
was certainly one of the most charming half hours in his life to him. He
thought of her all the rest of the day, saw her image continually during
the long office hours. He was haunted and bewitched by that floating and
yet tenacious recollection which the form of a beloved woman leaves in
us, and it seemed to him that if he could win that little person it
would be maddening happiness to him, almost above human realization.
Every morning she now shook hands with him, and he preserved the sense
of that touch and the recollection of the gentle pressure of her little
fingers until the next day, and he almost fancied that he preserved the
imprint on his palm. He anxiously waited for this short omnibus ride,
while Sundays seemed to him heartbreaking days. However, there was no
doubt that she loved him, for one Saturday, in spring, she promised to
go and lunch with him at Maisons-Laffitte the next day.
II
She was at the railway station first, which surprised him, but she said:
“Before going, I want to speak to you. We have twenty minutes, and that
is more than I shall take for what I have to say.”
She trembled as she hung on his arm, and looked down, her cheeks pale,
as she continued: “I do not want you to be deceived in me, and I shall
not go there with you, unless you promise, unless you swear—not to
do—not to do anything—that is at all improper.”
She had suddenly become as red as a poppy, and said no more. He did not
know what to reply, for he was happy and disappointed at the same time.
He should love her less, certainly, if he knew that her conduct was
light, but then it would be so charming, so delicious to have a little
flirtation.
As he did not say anything, she began to speak again in an agitated
voice and with tears in her eyes. “If you do not promise to respect me
altogether, I shall return home.” And so he squeezed her arm tenderly
and replied: “I promise, you shall only do what you like.” She appeared
relieved in mind, and asked, with a smile: “Do you really mean it?” And
he looked into her eyes and replied: “I swear it” “Now you may take the
tickets,” she said.
During the journey they could hardly speak, as the carriage was full,
and when they reached Maisons-Laffite they went toward the Seine. The
sun, which shone full on the river, on the leaves and the grass, seemed
to be reflected in their hearts, and they went, hand in hand, along the
bank, looking at the shoals of little fish swimming near the bank, and
they walked on, brimming over with happiness, as if they were walking on
air.
At last she said: “How foolish you must think me!”
“Why?” he asked. “To come out like this, all alone with you.”
“Certainly not; it is quite natural.” “No, no; it is not natural for me
—because I do not wish to commit a fault, and yet this is how girls
fall. But if you only knew how wretched it is, every day the same thing,
every day in the month and every month in the year. I live quite alone
with mamma, and as she has had a great deal of trouble, she is not very
cheerful. I do the best I can, and try to laugh in spite of everything,
but I do not always succeed. But, all the same, it was wrong in me to
come, though you, at any rate, will not be sorry.”
By way of an answer, he kissed her ardently on the ear that was nearest
him, but she moved from him with an abrupt movement, and, getting
suddenly angry, exclaimed: “Oh! Monsieur Francois, after what you swore
to me!” And they went back to Maisons-Laffitte.
They had lunch at the Petit-Havre, a low house, buried under four
enormous poplar trees, by the side of the river. The air, the heat, the
weak white wine and the sensation of being so close together made them
silent; their faces were flushed and they had a feeling of oppression;
but, after the coffee, they regained their high spirits, and, having
crossed the Seine, started off along the bank, toward the village of La
Frette. Suddenly he asked: “What-is your name?”
“Louise.”
“Louise,” he repeated and said nothing more.
The girl picked daisies and made them into a great bunch, while he sang
vigorously, as unrestrained as a colt that has been turned into a
meadow. On their left a vine-covered slope followed the river. Francois
stopped motionless with astonishment: “Oh, look there!” he said.
The vines had come to an end, and the whole slope was covered with lilac
bushes in flower. It was a purple wood! A kind of great carpet of
flowers stretched over the earth, reaching as far as the village, more
than two miles off. She also stood, surprised and delighted, and
murmured: “Oh! how pretty!” And, crossing a meadow, they ran toward that
curious low hill, which, every year, furnishes all the lilac that is
drawn through Paris on the carts of the flower venders.
There was a narrow path beneath the trees, so they took it, and when
they came to a small clearing, sat down.
Swarms of flies were buzzing around them and making a continuous, gentle
sound, and the sun, the bright sun of a perfectly still day, shone over
the bright slopes and from that forest of blossoms a powerful fragrance
was borne toward them, a breath of perfume, the breath of the flowers.
A church clock struck in the distance, and they embraced gently, then,
without the knowledge of anything but that kiss, lay down on the grass.
But she soon came to herself with the feeling of a great misfortune, and
began to cry and sob with grief, with her face buried in her hands.
He tried to console her, but she wanted to start to return and to go
home immediately; and she kept saying, as she walked along quickly:
“Good heavens! good heavens!”
He said to her: “Louise! Louise! Please let us stop here.” But now her
cheeks were red and her eyes hollow, and, as soon as they got to the
railway station in Paris, she left him without even saying good-by. III
When he met her in the omnibus, next day, she appeared to him to be
changed and thinner, and she said to him: “I want to speak to you; we
will get down at the Boulevard.”
As soon as they were on the pavement, she said:
“We must bid each other good-by; I cannot meet you again.” “But why?” he
asked. “Because I cannot; I have been culpable, and I will not be so
again.”
Then he implored her, tortured by his love, but she replied firmly: “No,
I cannot, I cannot.” He, however, only grew all the more excited and
promised to marry her, but she said again: “No,” and left him.
For a week he did not see her. He could not manage to meet her, and, as
he did not know her address, he thought that he had lost her altogether.
On the ninth day, however, there was a ring at his bell, and when he
opened the door, she was there. She threw herself into his arms and did
not resist any longer, and for three months they were close friends. He
was beginning to grow tired of her, when she whispered something to him,
and then he had one idea and wish: to break with her at any price. As,
however, he could not do that, not knowing how to begin, or what to say,
full of anxiety through fear of the consequences of his rash
indiscretion, he took a decisive step: one night he changed his lodgings
and disappeared.
The blow was so heavy that she did not look, for the man who had
abandoned her, but threw herself at her mother's knees and confessed her
misfortune, and, some months after, gave birth to a boy. IV
Years passed, and Francois Tessier grew old, without there having been
any alteration in his life. He led the dull, monotonous life of an
office clerk, without hope and without expectation. Every day he got up
at the same time, went through the same streets, went through the same
door, past the same porter, went into the same office, sat in the same
chair, and did the same work. He was alone in the world, alone during
the day in the midst of his different colleagues, and alone at night in
his bachelor's lodgings, and he laid by a hundred francs a month against
old age.
Every Sunday he went to the Champs-Elysees, to watch the elegant people,
the carriages and the pretty women, and the next day he used to say to
one of his colleagues: “The return of the carriages from the Bois du
Boulogne was very brilliant yesterday.” One fine Sunday morning,
however, he went into the Parc Monceau, where the mothers and nurses,
sitting on the sides of the walks, watched the children playing, and
suddenly Francois Tessier started. A woman passed by, holding two
children by the hand, a little boy of about ten and a little girl of
four. It was she!
He walked another hundred yards anti then fell into a chair, choking
with emotion. She had not recognized him, and so he came back, wishing
to see her again. She was sitting down now, and the boy was standing by
her side very quietly, while the little girl was making sand castles. It
was she, it was certainly she, but she had the reserved appearance of a
lady, was dressed simply, and looked self-possessed and dignified. He
looked at her from a distance, for he did not venture to go near; but
the little boy raised his head, and Francois Tessier felt himself
tremble. It was his own son, there could be no doubt of that. And, as he
looked at him, he thought he could recognize himself as he appeared in
an old photograph taken years ago. He remained hidden behind a tree,
waiting for her to go that he might follow her.
He did not sleep that night. The idea of the child especially tormented
him. His son! Oh, if he could only have known, have been sure! But what
could he have done? However, he went to the house where she lived and
asked about her. He was told that a neighbor, an honorable man of strict
morals, had been touched by her distress and had married her; he knew
the fault she had committed and had married her, and had even recognized
the child, his, Francois Tessier's child, as his own.
He returned to the Parc Monceau every Sunday, for then he always saw
her, and each time he was seized with a mad, an irresistible longing to
take his son into his arms, to cover him with kisses and to steal him,
to carry him off.
He suffered horribly in his wretched isolation as an old bachelor, with
nobody to care for him, and he also suffered atrocious mental torture,
torn by paternal tenderness springing from remorse, longing and jealousy
and from that need of loving one's own children which nature has
implanted in all. At last he determined to make a despairing attempt,
and, going up to her, as she entered the park, he said, standing in the
middle of the path, pale and with trembling lips: “You do not recognize
me.” She raised her eyes, looked at him, uttered an exclamation of
horror, of terror, and, taking the two children by the hand, she rushed
away, dragging them after her, while he went home and wept inconsolably.
Months passed without his seeing her again, but he suffered, day and
night, for he was a prey to his paternal love. He would gladly have
died, if he could only have kissed his son; he would have committed
murder, performed any task, braved any danger, ventured anything. He
wrote to her, but she did not reply, and, after writing her some twenty
letters, he saw that there was no hope of altering her determination,
and then he formed the desperate resolution of writing to her husband,
being quite prepared to receive a bullet from a revolver, if need be.
His letter only consisted of a few lines, as follows:
“Monsieur: You must have a perfect horror of my name, but I am so
wretched, so overcome by misery that my only hope is in you, and,
therefore, I venture to request you to grant me an interview of only
five minutes.
“I have the honor, etc.”
The next day he received the reply:
“Monsieur: I shall expect you to-morrow, Tuesday, at five o'clock.”
As he went up the staircase, Francois Tessier's heart beat so violently
that he had to stop several times. There was a dull and violent thumping
noise in his breast, as of some animal galloping; and he could breathe
only with difficulty, and had to hold on to the banisters, in order not
to fall.
He rang the bell on the third floor, and when a maid servant had opened
the door, he asked: “Does Monsieur Flamel live here?” “Yes, monsieur.
Kindly come in.”
He was shown into the drawing-room; he was alone, and waited, feeling
bewildered, as in the midst of a catastrophe, until a door opened, and a
man came in. He was tall, serious and rather stout, and wore a black
frock coat, and pointed to a chair with his hand. Francois Tessier sat
down, and then said, with choking breath: “Monsieur—monsieur—I do not
know whether you know my name—whether you know——”
Monsieur Flamel interrupted him. “You need not tell it me, monsieur, I
know it. My wife has spoken to me about you.” He spoke in the dignified
tone of voice of a good man who wishes to be severe, and with the
commonplace stateliness of an honorable man, and Francois Tessier
continued:
“Well, monsieur, I want to say this: I am dying of grief, of remorse, of
shame, and I would like once, only once to kiss the child.”
Monsieur Flamel got up and rang the bell, and when the servant came in,
he said: “Will you bring Louis here?” When she had gone out, they
remained face to face, without speaking, as they had nothing more to say
to one another, and waited. Then, suddenly, a little boy of ten rushed
into the room and ran up to the man whom he believed to be his father,
but he stopped when he saw the stranger, and Monsieur Flamel kissed him
and said: “Now, go and kiss that gentleman, my dear.” And the child went
up to the stranger and looked at him.
Francois Tessier had risen. He let his hat fall, and was ready to fall
himself as he looked at his son, while Monsieur Flamel had turned away,
from a feeling of delicacy, and was looking out of the window.
The child waited in surprise; but he picked up the hat and gave it to
the stranger. Then Francois, taking the child up in his arms, began to
kiss him wildly all over his face; on his eyes, his cheeks, his mouth,
his hair; and the youngster, frightened at the shower of kisses, tried
to avoid them, turned away his head, and pushed away the man's face with
his little hands. But suddenly Francois Tessier put him down and cried:
“Good-by! good-by!” And he rushed out of the room as if he had been a
thief.
MY UNCLE SOSTHENES
Some people are Freethinkers from sheer stupidity. My Uncle Sosthenes
was one of these. Some people are often religious for the same reason.
The very sight of a priest threw my uncle into a violent rage. He would
shake his fist and make grimaces at him, and would then touch a piece of
iron when the priest's back was turned, forgetting that the latter
action showed a belief after all, the belief in the evil eye. Now, when
beliefs are unreasonable, one should have all or none at all. I myself
am a Freethinker; I revolt at all dogmas, but feel no anger toward
places of worship, be they Catholic, Apostolic, Roman, Protestant,
Greek, Russian, Buddhist, Jewish, or Mohammedan.
My uncle was a Freemason, and I used to declare that they are stupider
than old women devotees. That is my opinion, and I maintain it; if we
must have any religion at all, the old one is good enough for me.
What is their object? Mutual help to be obtained by tickling the palms
of each other's hands. I see no harm in it, for they put into practice
the Christian precept: “Do unto others as ye would they should do unto
you.” The only difference consists in the tickling, but it does not seem
worth while to make such a fuss about lending a poor devil half a crown.
To all my arguments my uncle's reply used to be:
“We are raising up a religion against a religion; Free Thought will kill
clericalism. Freemasonry is the stronghold, of those who are demolishing
all deities.”
“Very well, my dear uncle,” I would reply—in my heart I felt inclined to
say, “You old idiot! it is just that which I am blaming you for. Instead
of destroying, you are organizing competition; it is only a case of
lowering prices. And then, if you admitted only Freethinkers among you,
I could understand it, but you admit anybody. You have a number of
Catholics among you, even the leaders of the party. Pius IX is said to
have been one of you before he became pope. If you call a society with
such an organization a bulwark against clericalism, I think it is an
extremely weak one.”
“My dear boy,” my uncle would reply, with a wink, “we are most to be
dreaded in politics; slowly and surely we are everywhere undermining the
monarchical spirit.”
Then I broke out: “Yes, you are very clever! If you tell me that
Freemasonry is an election machine, I will grant it. I will never deny
that it is used as a machine to control candidates of all shades; if you
say that it is only used to hoodwink people, to drill them to go to the
polls as soldiers are sent under fire, I agree with you; if you declare
that it is indispensable to all political ambitions because it changes
all its members into electoral agents, I should say to you: 'That is as
clear as the sun.' But when you tell me that it serves to undermine the
monarchical spirit, I can only laugh in your face.
“Just consider that gigantic and secret democratic association which had
Prince Napoleon for its grand master under the Empire; which has the
Crown Prince for its grand master in Germany, the Czar's brother in
Russia, and to which the Prince of Wales and King Humbert, and nearly
all the crowned heads of the globe belong.”
“You are quite right,” my uncle said; “but all these persons are serving
our projects without guessing it.”
I felt inclined to tell him he was talking a pack of nonsense.
It was, however, indeed a sight to see my uncle when he had a Freemason
to dinner.
On meeting they shook hands in a manner that was irresistibly funny; one
could see that they were going through a series of secret, mysterious
signs.
Then my uncle would take his friend into a corner to tell him something
important, and at dinner they had a peculiar way of looking at each
other, and of drinking to each other, in a manner as if to say: “We know
all about it, don't we?”
And to think that there are millions on the face of the globe who are
amused at such monkey tricks! I would sooner be a Jesuit.
Now, in our town there really was an old Jesuit who was my uncle's
detestation. Every time he met him, or if he only saw him at a distance,
he used to say: “Get away, you toad.” And then, taking my arm, he would
whisper to me:
“See here, that fellow will play me a trick some day or other, I feel
sure of it.”
My uncle spoke quite truly, and this was how it happened, and through my
fault.
It was close on Holy Week, and my uncle made up his mind to give a
dinner on Good Friday, a real dinner, with his favorite chitterlings and
black puddings. I resisted as much as I could, and said:
“I shall eat meat on that day, but at home, quite by myself. Your
manifestation, as you call it, is an idiotic idea. Why should you
manifest? What does it matter to you if people do not eat any meat?”
But my uncle would not be persuaded. He asked three of his friends to
dine with him at one of the best restaurants in the town, and as he was
going to pay the bill I had certainly, after all, no scruples about
manifesting.
At four o'clock we took a conspicuous place in the most frequented
restaurant in the town, and my uncle ordered dinner in a loud voice for
six o'clock.
We sat down punctually, and at ten o'clock we had not yet finished. Five
of us had drunk eighteen bottles of choice, still wine and four of
champagne. Then my uncle proposed what he was in the habit of calling
“the archbishop's circuit.” Each man put six small glasses in front of
him, each of them filled with a different liqueur, and they had all to
be emptied at one gulp, one after another, while one of the waiters
counted twenty. It was very stupid, but my uncle thought it was very
suitable to the occasion.
At eleven o'clock he was as drunk as a fly. So we had to take him home
in a cab and put him to bed, and one could easily foresee that his anti-
clerical demonstration would end in a terrible fit of indigestion.
As I was going back to my lodgings, being rather drunk myself, with a
cheerful drunkenness, a Machiavellian idea struck me which satisfied all
my sceptical instincts.
I arranged my necktie, put on a look of great distress, and went and,
rang loudly at the old Jesuit's door. As he was deaf he made me wait a
longish while, but at length appeared at his window in a cotton nightcap
and asked what I wanted.
I shouted out at the top of my voice:
“Make haste, reverend sir, and open the door; a poor, despairing, sick
man is in need of your spiritual ministrations.”
The good, kind man put on his trousers as quickly as he could, and came
down without his cassock. I told him in a breathless voice that my
uncle, the Freethinker, had been taken suddenly ill, and fearing it was
going to be something serious, he had been seized with a sudden dread of
death, and wished to see the priest and talk to him; to have his advice
and comfort, to make his peace with the Church, and to confess, so as to
be able to cross the dreaded threshold at peace with himself; and I
added in a mocking tone:
“At any rate, he wishes it, and if it does him no good it can do him no
harm.”
The old Jesuit, who was startled, delighted, and almost trembling, said
to me:
“Wait a moment, my son; I will come with you.” But I replied: “Pardon
me, reverend father, if I do not go with you; but my convictions will
not allow me to do so. I even refused to come and fetch you, so I beg
you not to say that you have seen me, but to declare that you had a
presentiment—a sort of revelation of his illness.”
The priest consented and went off quickly; knocked at my uncle's door,
and was soon let in; and I saw the black cassock disappear within that
stronghold of Free Thought.
I hid under a neighboring gateway to wait results. Had he been well, my
uncle would have half-murdered the Jesuit, but I knew that he would
scarcely be able to move an arm, and I asked myself gleefully what sort
of a scene would take place between these antagonists, what disputes,
what arguments, what a hubbub, and what would be the issue of the
situation, which my uncle's indignation would render still more tragic?
I laughed till my sides ached, and said half aloud: “Oh, what a joke,
what a joke!”
Meanwhile it was getting very cold, and I noticed that the Jesuit stayed
a long time, and I thought: “They are having an argument, I suppose.”
One, two, three hours passed, and still the reverend father did not come
out. What had happened? Had my uncle died in a fit when he saw him, or
had he killed the cassocked gentleman? Perhaps they had mutually
devoured each other? This last supposition appeared very unlikely, for I
fancied that my uncle was quite incapable of swallowing a grain more
nourishment at that moment.
At last the day broke.
I was very uneasy, and, not venturing to go into the house myself, went
to one of my friends who lived opposite. I woke him up, explained
matters to him, much to his amusement and astonishment, and took
possession of his window.
At nine o'clock he relieved me, and I got a little sleep. At two o'clock
I, in my turn, replaced him. We were utterly astonished.
At six o'clock the Jesuit left, with a very happy and satisfied look on
his face, and we saw him go away with a quiet step.
Then, timid and ashamed, I went and knocked at the door of my uncle's
house; and when the servant opened it I did not dare to ask her any
questions, but went upstairs without saying a word.
My uncle was lying, pale and exhausted, with weary, sorrowful eyes and
heavy arms, on his bed. A little religious picture was fastened to one
of the bed curtains with a pin.
“Why, uncle,” I said, “in bed still? Are you not well?”
He replied in a feeble voice:
“Oh, my dear boy, I have been very ill, nearly dead.”
“How was that, uncle?”
“I don't know; it was most surprising. But what is stranger still is
that the Jesuit priest who has just left—you know, that excellent man
whom I have made such fun of—had a divine revelation of my state, and
came to see me.”
I was seized with an almost uncontrollable desire to laugh, and with
difficulty said: “Oh, really!”
“Yes, he came. He heard a voice telling him to get up and come to me,
because I was going to die. I was a revelation.”
I pretended to sneeze, so as not to burst out laughing; I felt inclined
to roll on the ground with amusement.
In about a minute I managed to say indignantly:
“And you received him, uncle? You, a Freethinker, a Freemason? You did
not have him thrown out of doors?”
He seemed confused, and stammered:
“Listen a moment, it is so astonishing—so astonishing and providential!
He also spoke to me about my father; it seems he knew him formerly.”
“Your father, uncle? But that is no reason for receiving a Jesuit.”
“I know that, but I was very ill, and he looked after me most devotedly
all night long. He was perfect; no doubt he saved my life; those men all
know a little of medicine.”
“Oh! he looked after you all night? But you said just now that he had
only been gone a very short time.”
“That is quite true; I kept him to breakfast after all his kindness. He
had it at a table by my bedside while I drank a cup of tea.”
“And he ate meat?”
My uncle looked vexed, as if I had said something very uncalled for, and
then added:
“Don't joke, Gaston; such things are out of place at times. He has shown
me more devotion than many a relation would have done, and I expect to
have his convictions respected.”
This rather upset me, but I answered, nevertheless: “Very well, uncle;
and what did you do after breakfast?”
“We played a game of bezique, and then he repeated his breviary while I
read a little book which he happened to have in his pocket, and which
was not by any means badly written.”
“A religious book, uncle?”
“Yes, and no, or, rather—no. It is the history of their missions in
Central Africa, and is rather a book of travels and adventures. What
these men have done is very grand.”
I began to feel that matters were going badly, so I got up. “Well, good-
by, uncle,” I said, “I see you are going to give up Freemasonry for
religion; you are a renegade.”
He was still rather confused, and stammered:
“Well, but religion is a sort of Freemasonry.”
“When is your Jesuit coming back?” I asked.
“I don't—I don't know exactly; to-morrow, perhaps; but it is not
certain.”
I went out, altogether overwhelmed.
My joke turned out very badly for me! My uncle became thoroughly
converted, and if that had been all I should not have cared so much.
Clerical or Freemason, to me it is all the same; six of one and half a
dozen of the other; but the worst of it is that he has just made his
will—yes, made his will—and he has disinherited me in favor of that
rascally Jesuit!
THE BARONESS
“Come with me,” said my friend Boisrene, “you will see some very
interesting bric-a-brac and works of art there.”
He conducted me to the first floor of an elegant house in one of the big
streets of Paris. We were welcomed by a very pleasing man, with
excellent manners, who led us from room to room, showing us rare things,
the price of which he mentioned carelessly. Large sums, ten, twenty,
thirty, fifty thousand francs, dropped from his lips with such grace and
ease that one could not doubt that this gentleman-merchant had millions
shut up in his safe.
I had known him by reputation for a long time. Very bright, clever,
intelligent, he acted as intermediary in all sorts of transactions. He
kept in touch with all the richest art amateurs in Paris, and even of
Europe and America, knowing their tastes and preferences; he apprised
them by letter, or by wire if they lived in a distant city, as soon as
he knew of some work of art which might suit them.
Men of the best society had had recourse to him in times of difficulty,
either to find money for gambling, or to pay off a debt, or to sell a
picture, a family jewel, or a tapestry.
It was said that he never refused his services when he saw a chance of
gain.
Boisrene seemed very intimate with this strange merchant. They must have
worked together in many a deal. I observed the man with great interest.
He was tall, thin, bald, and very elegant. His soft, insinuating voice
had a peculiar, tempting charm which seemed to give the objects a
special value. When he held anything in his hands, he turned it round
and round, looking at it with such skill, refinement, and sympathy that
the object seemed immediately to be beautiful and transformed by his
look and touch. And its value increased in one's estimation, after the
object had passed from the showcase into his hands.
“And your Crucifix,” said Boisrene, “that beautiful Renaissance Crucifix
which you showed me last year?”
The man smiled and answered:
“It has been sold, and in a very peculiar manner. There is a real
Parisian story for you! Would you like to hear it?”
“With pleasure.”
“Do you know the Baroness Samoris?”
“Yes and no. I have seen her once, but I know what she is!”
“You know—everything?”
“Yes.”
“Would you mind telling me, so that I can see whether you are not
mistaken?”
“Certainly. Mme. Samoris is a woman of the world who has a daughter,
without anyone having known her husband. At any rate, she is received in
a certain tolerant, or blind society. She goes to church and devoutly
partakes of Communion, so that everyone may know it, and she never
compromises herself. She expects her daughter to marry well. Is that
correct?”
“Yes, but I will complete your information. She is a woman who makes
herself respected by her admirers in spite of everything. That is a rare
quality, for in this manner she can get what she wishes from a man. The
man whom she has chosen without his suspecting it courts her for a long
time, longs for her timidly, wins her with astonishment and possesses
her with consideration. He does not notice that he is paying, she is so
tactful; and she maintains her relations on such a footing of reserve
and dignity that he would slap the first man who dared doubt her in the
least. And all this in the best of faith.
“Several times I have been able to render little services to this woman.
She has no secrets from me.
“Toward the beginning of January she came to me in order to borrow
thirty thousand francs. Naturally, I did not lend them to her; but, as I
wished to oblige her, I told her to explain her situation to me
completely, so that I might see whether there was not something I could
do for her.
“She told me her troubles in such cautious language that she could not
have spoken more delicately of her child's first communion. I finally
managed to understand that times were hard, and that she was penniless.
“The commercial crisis, political unrest, rumors of war, had made money
scarce even in the hands of her clients. And then, of course, she was
very particular.
“She would associate only with a man in the best of society, who could
strengthen her reputation as well as help her financially. A reveller,
no matter how rich, would have compromised her forever, and would have
made the marriage of her daughter quite doubtful.
“She had to maintain her household expenses and continue to entertain,
in order not to lose the opportunity of finding, among her numerous
visitors, the discreet and distinguished friend for whom she was
waiting, and whom she would choose.
“I showed her that my thirty thousand francs would have but little
likelihood of returning to me; for, after spending them all, she would
have to find at least sixty thousand more, in a lump, to pay me back.
“She seemed very disheartened when she heard this. I did not know just
what to do, when an idea, a really fine idea, struck me.
“I had just bought this Renaissance Crucifix which I showed you, an
admirable piece of workmanship, one of the finest of its land that I
have ever seen.
“'My dear friend,' I said to her, 'I am going to send you that piece of
ivory. You will invent some ingenious, touching, poetic story, anything
that you wish, to explain your desire for parting with it. It is, of
course, a family heirloom left you by your father.
“'I myself will send you amateurs, or will bring them to you. The rest
concerns you. Before they come I will drop you a line about their
position, both social and financial. This Crucifix is worth fifty
thousand francs; but I will let it go for thirty thousand. The
difference will belong to you.'
“She considered the matter seriously for several minutes, and then
answered: 'Yes, it is, perhaps, a good idea. I thank you very-much.'
“The next day I sent her my Crucifix, and the same evening the Baron de
Saint-Hospital.
“For three months I sent her my best clients, from a business point of
view. But I heard nothing more from her.
“One day I received a visit from a foreigner who spoke very little
French. I decided to introduce him personally to the baroness, in order
to see how she was getting along.
“A footman in black livery received us and ushered us into a quiet
little parlor, furnished with taste, where we waited for several
minutes. She appeared, charming as usual, extended her hand to me and
invited us to be seated; and when I had explained the reason of my
visit, she rang.
“The footman appeared.
“'See if Mlle. Isabelle can let us go into her oratory.' The young girl
herself brought the answer. She was about fifteen years of age, modest
and good to look upon in the sweet freshness of her youth. She wished to
conduct us herself to her chapel.
“It was a kind of religious boudoir where a silver lamp was burning
before the Crucifix, my Crucifix, on a background of black velvet. The
setting was charming and very clever. The child crossed herself and then
said:
“'Look, gentlemen. Isn't it beautiful?'
“I took the object, examined it and declared it to be remarkable. The
foreigner also examined it, but he seemed much more interested in the
two women than in the crucifix.
“A delicate odor of incense, flowers and perfume pervaded the whole
house. One felt at home there. This really was a comfortable home, where
one would have liked to linger.
“When we had returned to the parlor I delicately broached the subject of
the price. Mme. Samoris, lowering her eyes, asked fifty thousand francs.
“Then she added: 'If you wish to see it again, monsieur, I very seldom
go out before three o'clock; and I can be found at home every day.'
“In the street the stranger asked me for some details about the
baroness, whom he had found charming. But I did not hear anything more
from either of them.
“Three months passed by.
“One morning, hardly two weeks ago, she came here at about lunch time,
and, placing a roll of bills in my hand, said: 'My dear, you are an
angel! Here are fifty thousand francs; I am buying your crucifix, and I
am paying twenty thousand francs more for it than the price agreed upon,
on condition that you always—always send your clients to me—for it is
still for sale.'”
MOTHER AND SON
A party of men were chatting in the smoking room after dinner. We were
talking of unexpected legacies, strange inheritances. Then M. le
Brument, who was sometimes called “the illustrious judge” and at other
times “the illustrious lawyer,” went and stood with his back to the
fire.
“I have,” said he, “to search for an heir who disappeared under
peculiarly distressing circumstances. It is one of those simple and
terrible dramas of ordinary life, a thing which possibly happens every
day, and which is nevertheless one of the most dreadful things I know.
Here are the facts:
“Nearly six months ago I was called to the bedside of a dying woman. She
said to me:
“'Monsieur, I want to intrust to you the most delicate, the most
difficult, and the most wearisome mission that can be conceived. Be good
enough to notice my will, which is there on the table. A sum of five
thousand francs is left to you as a fee if you do not succeed, and of a
hundred thousand francs if you do succeed. I want you to find my son
after my death.'
“She asked me to assist her to sit up in bed, in order that she might
talk with greater ease, for her voice, broken and gasping, was whistling
in her throat.
“It was a very wealthy establishment. The luxurious apartment, of an
elegant simplicity, was upholstered with materials as thick as walls,
with a soft inviting surface.
“The dying woman continued:
“'You are the first to hear my horrible story. I will try to have
strength enough to finish it. You must know all, in order that you, whom
I know to be a kind-hearted man as well as a man of the world, may have
a sincere desire to aid me with all your power.
“'Listen to me:
“'Before my marriage, I loved a young man, whose suit was rejected by my
family because he was not rich enough. Not long afterward, I married a
man of great wealth. I married him through ignorance, through obedience,
through indifference, as young girls do marry.
“'I had a child, a boy. My husband died in the course of a few years.
“'He whom I had loved had married, in his turn. When he saw that I was a
widow, he was crushed by grief at knowing he was not free. He came to
see me; he wept and sobbed so bitterly, that it was enough to break my
heart. He came to see me at first as a friend. Perhaps I ought not to
have received him. What could I do? I was alone, so sad, so solitary, so
hopeless! And I loved him still. What sufferings we women have sometimes
to endure!
“'I had only him in the world, my parents being dead. He came
frequently; he spent whole evenings with me. I should not have let him
come so often, seeing that he was married. But I had not enough will-
power to prevent him from coming.
“'How can I tell it?—he became my lover. How did this come about? Can I
explain it? Can any one explain such things? Do you think it could be
otherwise when two human beings are drawn to each other by the
irresistible force of mutual affection? Do you believe, monsieur, that
it is always in our power to resist, that we can keep up the struggle
forever, and refuse to yield to the prayers, the supplications, the
tears, the frenzied words, the appeals on bended knees, the transports
of passion, with which we are pursued by the man we adore, whom we want
to gratify even in his slightest wishes, whom we desire to crown with
every possible happiness, and whom, if we are to be guided by a worldly
code of honor, we must drive to despair? What strength would it not
require? What a renunciation of happiness? what self-denial? and even
what virtuous selfishness?
“'In short, monsieur, I was his mistress; and I was happy. I became—and
this was my greatest weakness and my greatest piece of cowardice-I
became his wife's friend.
“'We brought up my son together; we made a man of him, a thorough man,
intelligent, full of sense and resolution, of large and generous ideas.
The boy reached the age of seventeen.
“'He, the young man, was fond of my—my lover, almost as fond of him as I
was myself, for he had been equally cherished and cared for by both of
us. He used to call him his 'dear friend,' and respected him immensely,
having never received from him anything but wise counsels and an example
of integrity, honor, and probity. He looked upon him as an old loyal and
devoted comrade of his mother, as a sort of moral father, guardian,
protector—how am I to describe it?
“'Perhaps the reason why he never asked any questions was that he had
been accustomed from his earliest years to see this man in my house, at
my side, and at his side, always concerned about us both.
“'One evening the three of us were to dine together—this was my chief
amusement—and I waited for the two men, asking myself which of them
would be the first to arrive. The door opened; it was my old friend. I
went toward him, with outstretched arms; and he pressed my lips in a
long, delicious kiss.
“'All of a sudden, a slight sound, a faint rustling, that mysterious
sensation which indicates the presence of another person, made us start
and turn round abruptly. Jean, my son, stood there, livid, staring at
us.
“'There was a moment of atrocious confusion. I drew back, holding out my
hand toward my son as if in supplication; but I could not see him. He
had gone.
“'We remained facing each other—my lover and I—crushed, unable to utter
a word. I sank into an armchair, and I felt a desire, a vague, powerful
desire, to flee, to go out into the night, and to disappear forever.
Then convulsive sobs rose in my throat, and I wept, shaken with spasms,
my heart breaking, all my nerves writhing with the horrible sensation of
an irreparable misfortune, and with that dreadful sense of shame which,
in such moments as this, fills a mother's heart.
“'He looked at me in a terrified manner, not venturing to approach, to
speak to me, or to touch me, for fear of the boy's return. At last he
said:
“'I am going to follow him-to talk to him—to explain matters to him. In
short, I must see him and let him know——”
“'And he hurried away.
“'I waited—waited in a distracted frame of mind, trembling at the least
sound, starting with fear and with some unutterably strange and
intolerable emotion at every slight crackling of the fire in the grate.
“'I waited an hour, two hours, feeling my heart swell with a dread I had
never before experienced, such anguish that I would not wish the
greatest criminal to endure ten minutes of such misery. Where was my
son? What was he doing?
“'About midnight, a messenger brought me a note from my lover. I still
know its contents by heart:
“'Has your son returned? I did not find him. I am down here. I do not
want to go up at this hour.”
“'I wrote in pencil on the same slip of paper:
“'Jean has not returned. You must find him.”
“'And I remained all night in the armchair, waiting for him.
“'I felt as if I were going mad. I longed to run wildly about, to roll
on the ground. And yet I did not even stir, but kept waiting hour after
hour. What was going to happen? I tried to imagine, to guess. But I
could form no conception, in spite of my efforts, in spite of the
tortures of my soul!
“'And now I feared that they might meet. What would they do in that
case? What would my son do? My mind was torn with fearful doubts, with
terrible suppositions.
“'You can understand my feelings, can you not, monsieur? “'My
chambermaid, who knew nothing, who understood nothing, came into the
room every moment, believing, naturally, that I had lost my reason. I
sent her away with a word or a movement of the hand. She went for the
doctor, who found me in the throes of a nervous attack.
“'I was put to bed. I had brain fever.
“'When I regained consciousness, after a long illness, I saw beside my
bed my—lover—alone.
“'I exclaimed:
“'My son? Where is my son?
“'He made no reply. I stammered:
“'Dead-dead. Has he committed suicide?
“'No, no, I swear it. But we have not found him in spite of all my
efforts.
“'Then, becoming suddenly exasperated and even indignant—for women are
subject to such outbursts of unaccountable and unreasoning anger—I said:
“'I forbid you to come near me or to see me again unless you find him.
Go away!
“He did go away.
“'I have never seen one or the other of them since, monsieur, and thus I
have lived for the last twenty years.
“'Can you imagine what all this meant to me? Can you understand this
monstrous punishment, this slow, perpetual laceration of a mother's
heart, this abominable, endless waiting? Endless, did I say? No; it is
about to end, for I am dying. I am dying without ever again seeing
either of them—either one or the other!
“'He—the man I loved—has written to me every day for the last twenty
years; and I—I have never consented to see him, even for one second; for
I had a strange feeling that, if he were to come back here, my son would
make his appearance at the same moment. Oh! my son! my son! Is he dead?
Is he living? Where is he hiding? Over there, perhaps, beyond the great
ocean, in some country so far away that even its very name is unknown to
me! Does he ever think of me? Ah! if he only knew! How cruel one's
children are! Did he understand to what frightful suffering he condemned
me, into what depths of despair, into what tortures, he cast me while I
was still in the prime of life, leaving me to suffer until this moment,
when I am about to die—me, his mother, who loved him with all the
intensity of a mother's love? Oh! isn't it cruel, cruel?
“'You will tell him all this, monsieur—will you not? You will repeat to
him my last words:
“'My child, my dear, dear child, be less harsh toward poor women! Life
is already brutal and savage enough in its dealings with them. My dear
son, think of what the existence of your poor mother has been ever since
the day you left her. My dear child, forgive her, and love her, now that
she is dead, for she has had to endure the most frightful penance ever
inflicted on a woman.”
“She gasped for breath, trembling, as if she had addressed the last
words to her son and as if he stood by her bedside.
“Then she added:
“'You will tell him also, monsieur, that I never again saw-the other.'
“Once more she ceased speaking, then, in a broken voice, she said:
“'Leave me now, I beg of you. I want to die all alone, since they are
not with me.'”
Maitre Le Brument added:
“And I left the house, monsieurs, crying like a fool, so bitterly,
indeed, that my coachman turned round to stare at me.
“And to think that, every day, dramas like this are being enacted all
around us!
“I have not found the son—that son—well, say what you like about him,
but I call him that criminal son!”
THE HAND
All were crowding around M. Bermutier, the judge, who was giving his
opinion about the Saint-Cloud mystery. For a month this in explicable
crime had been the talk of Paris. Nobody could make head or tail of it.
M. Bermutier, standing with his back to the fireplace, was talking,
citing the evidence, discussing the various theories, but arriving at no
conclusion.
Some women had risen, in order to get nearer to him, and were standing
with their eyes fastened on the clean-shaven face of the judge, who was
saying such weighty things. They, were shaking and trembling, moved by
fear and curiosity, and by the eager and insatiable desire for the
horrible, which haunts the soul of every woman. One of them, paler than
the others, said during a pause:
“It's terrible. It verges on the supernatural. The truth will never be
known.”
The judge turned to her:
“True, madame, it is likely that the actual facts will never be
discovered. As for the word 'supernatural' which you have just used, it
has nothing to do with the matter. We are in the presence of a very
cleverly conceived and executed crime, so well enshrouded in mystery
that we cannot disentangle it from the involved circumstances which
surround it. But once I had to take charge of an affair in which the
uncanny seemed to play a part. In fact, the case became so confused that
it had to be given up.”
Several women exclaimed at once:
“Oh! Tell us about it!”
M. Bermutier smiled in a dignified manner, as a judge should, and went
on:
“Do not think, however, that I, for one minute, ascribed anything in the
case to supernatural influences. I believe only in normal causes. But
if, instead of using the word 'supernatural' to express what we do not
understand, we were simply to make use of the word 'inexplicable,' it
would be much better. At any rate, in the affair of which I am about to
tell you, it is especially the surrounding, preliminary circumstances
which impressed me. Here are the facts:
“I was, at that time, a judge at Ajaccio, a little white city on the
edge of a bay which is surrounded by high mountains.
“The majority of the cases which came up before me concerned vendettas.
There are some that are superb, dramatic, ferocious, heroic. We find
there the most beautiful causes for revenge of which one could dream,
enmities hundreds of years old, quieted for a time but never
extinguished; abominable stratagems, murders becoming massacres and
almost deeds of glory. For two years I heard of nothing but the price of
blood, of this terrible Corsican prejudice which compels revenge for
insults meted out to the offending person and all his descendants and
relatives. I had seen old men, children, cousins murdered; my head was
full of these stories.
“One day I learned that an Englishman had just hired a little villa at
the end of the bay for several years. He had brought with him a French
servant, whom he had engaged on the way at Marseilles.
“Soon this peculiar person, living alone, only going out to hunt and
fish, aroused a widespread interest. He never spoke to any one, never
went to the town, and every morning he would practice for an hour or so
with his revolver and rifle.
“Legends were built up around him. It was said that he was some high
personage, fleeing from his fatherland for political reasons; then it
was affirmed that he was in hiding after having committed some
abominable crime. Some particularly horrible circumstances were even
mentioned.
“In my judicial position I thought it necessary to get some information
about this man, but it was impossible to learn anything. He called
himself Sir John Rowell.
“I therefore had to be satisfied with watching him as closely as I
could, but I could see nothing suspicious about his actions.
“However, as rumors about him were growing and becoming more widespread,
I decided to try to see this stranger myself, and I began to hunt
regularly in the neighborhood of his grounds.
“For a long time I watched without finding an opportunity. At last it
came to me in the shape of a partridge which I shot and killed right in
front of the Englishman. My dog fetched it for me, but, taking the bird,
I went at once to Sir John Rowell and, begging his pardon, asked him to
accept it.
“He was a big man, with red hair and beard, very tall, very broad, a
kind of calm and polite Hercules. He had nothing of the so-called
British stiffness, and in a broad English accent he thanked me warmly
for my attention. At the end of a month we had had five or six
conversations.
“One night, at last, as I was passing before his door, I saw him in the
garden, seated astride a chair, smoking his pipe. I bowed and he invited
me to come in and have a glass of beer. I needed no urging.
“He received me with the most punctilious English courtesy, sang the
praises of France and of Corsica, and declared that he was quite in love
with this country.
“Then, with great caution and under the guise of a vivid interest, I
asked him a few questions about his life and his plans. He answered
without embarrassment, telling me that he had travelled a great deal in
Africa, in the Indies, in America. He added, laughing:
“'I have had many adventures.'
“Then I turned the conversation on hunting, and he gave me the most
curious details on hunting the hippopotamus, the tiger, the elephant and
even the gorilla.
“I said:
“'Are all these animals dangerous?'
“He smiled:
“'Oh, no! Man is the worst.'
“And he laughed a good broad laugh, the wholesome laugh of a contented
Englishman.
“'I have also frequently been man-hunting.'
“Then he began to talk about weapons, and he invited me to come in and
see different makes of guns.
“His parlor was draped in black, black silk embroidered in gold. Big
yellow flowers, as brilliant as fire, were worked on the dark material.
“He said:
“'It is a Japanese material.'
“But in the middle of the widest panel a strange thing attracted my
attention. A black object stood out against a square of red velvet. I
went up to it; it was a hand, a human hand. Not the clean white hand of
a skeleton, but a dried black hand, with yellow nails, the muscles
exposed and traces of old blood on the bones, which were cut off as
clean as though it had been chopped off with an axe, near the middle of
the forearm.
“Around the wrist, an enormous iron chain, riveted and soldered to this
unclean member, fastened it to the wall by a ring, strong enough to hold
an elephant in leash.
“I asked:
“'What is that?'
“The Englishman answered quietly:
“'That is my best enemy. It comes from America, too. The bones were
severed by a sword and the skin cut off with a sharp stone and dried in
the sun for a week.'
“I touched these human remains, which must have belonged to a giant. The
uncommonly long fingers were attached by enormous tendons which still
had pieces of skin hanging to them in places. This hand was terrible to
see; it made one think of some savage vengeance.
“I said:
“'This man must have been very strong.'
“The Englishman answered quietly:
“'Yes, but I was stronger than he. I put on this chain to hold him.'
“I thought that he was joking. I said:
“'This chain is useless now, the hand won't run away.'
“Sir John Rowell answered seriously:
“'It always wants to go away. This chain is needed.'
“I glanced at him quickly, questioning his face, and I asked myself:
“'Is he an insane man or a practical joker?'
“But his face remained inscrutable, calm and friendly. I turned to other
subjects, and admired his rifles.
“However, I noticed that he kept three loaded revolvers in the room, as
though constantly in fear of some attack.
“I paid him several calls. Then I did not go any more. People had become
used to his presence; everybody had lost interest in him.
“A whole year rolled by. One morning, toward the end of November, my
servant awoke me and announced that Sir John Rowell had been murdered
during the night.
“Half an hour later I entered the Englishman's house, together with the
police commissioner and the captain of the gendarmes. The servant,
bewildered and in despair, was crying before the door. At first I
suspected this man, but he was innocent.
“The guilty party could never be found.
“On entering Sir John's parlor, I noticed the body, stretched out on its
back, in the middle of the room.
“His vest was torn, the sleeve of his jacket had been pulled off,
everything pointed to, a violent struggle.
“The Englishman had been strangled! His face was black, swollen and
frightful, and seemed to express a terrible fear. He held something
between his teeth, and his neck, pierced by five or six holes which
looked as though they had been made by some iron instrument, was covered
with blood.
“A physician joined us. He examined the finger marks on the neck for a
long time and then made this strange announcement:
“'It looks as though he had been strangled by a skeleton.'
“A cold chill seemed to run down my back, and I looked over to where I
had formerly seen the terrible hand. It was no longer there. The chain
was hanging down, broken.
“I bent over the dead man and, in his contracted mouth, I found one of
the fingers of this vanished hand, cut—or rather sawed off by the teeth
down to the second knuckle.
“Then the investigation began. Nothing could be discovered. No door,
window or piece of furniture had been forced. The two watch dogs had not
been aroused from their sleep.
“Here, in a few words, is the testimony of the servant:
“For a month his master had seemed excited. He had received many
letters, which he would immediately burn.
“Often, in a fit of passion which approached madness, he had taken a
switch and struck wildly at this dried hand riveted to the wall, and
which had disappeared, no one knows how, at the very hour of the crime.
“He would go to bed very late and carefully lock himself in. He always
kept weapons within reach. Often at night he would talk loudly, as
though he were quarrelling with some one.
“That night, somehow, he had made no noise, and it was only on going to
open the windows that the servant had found Sir John murdered. He
suspected no one.
“I communicated what I knew of the dead man to the judges and public
officials. Throughout the whole island a minute investigation was
carried on. Nothing could be found out.
“One night, about three months after the crime, I had a terrible
nightmare. I seemed to see the horrible hand running over my curtains
and walls like an immense scorpion or spider. Three times I awoke, three
times I went to sleep again; three times I saw the hideous object
galloping round my room and moving its fingers like legs.
“The following day the hand was brought me, found in the cemetery, on
the grave of Sir John Rowell, who had been buried there because we had
been unable to find his family. The first finger was missing.
“Ladies, there is my story. I know nothing more.”
The women, deeply stirred, were pale and trembling. One of them
exclaimed:
“But that is neither a climax nor an explanation! We will be unable to
sleep unless you give us your opinion of what had occurred.”
The judge smiled severely:
“Oh! Ladies, I shall certainly spoil your terrible dreams. I simply
believe that the legitimate owner of the hand was not dead, that he came
to get it with his remaining one. But I don't know how. It was a kind of
vendetta.”
One of the women murmured:
“No, it can't be that.”
And the judge, still smiling, said:
“Didn't I tell you that my explanation would not satisfy you?”
A TRESS OF HAIR
The walls of the cell were bare and white washed. A narrow grated
window, placed so high that one could not reach it, lighted this
sinister little room. The mad inmate, seated on a straw chair, looked at
us with a fixed, vacant and haunted expression. He was very thin, with
hollow cheeks and hair almost white, which one guessed might have turned
gray in a few months. His clothes appeared to be too large for his
shrunken limbs, his sunken chest and empty paunch. One felt that this
man's mind was destroyed, eaten by his thoughts, by one thought, just as
a fruit is eaten by a worm. His craze, his idea was there in his brain,
insistent, harassing, destructive. It wasted his frame little by little.
It—the invisible, impalpable, intangible, immaterial idea—was mining his
health, drinking his blood, snuffing out his life.
What a mystery was this man, being killed by an ideal! He aroused
sorrow, fear and pity, this madman. What strange, tremendous and deadly
thoughts dwelt within this forehead which they creased with deep
wrinkles which were never still?
“He has terrible attacks of rage,” said the doctor to me. “His is one of
the most peculiar cases I have ever seen. He has seizures of erotic and
macaberesque madness. He is a sort of necrophile. He has kept a journal
in which he sets forth his disease with the utmost clearness. In it you
can, as it were, put your finger on it. If it would interest you, you
may go over this document.”
I followed the doctor into his office, where he handed me this wretched
man's diary, saying: “Read it and tell me what you think of it.” I read
as follows:
“Until the age of thirty-two I lived peacefully, without knowing love.
Life appeared very simple, very pleasant and very easy. I was rich. I
enjoyed so many things that I had no passion for anything in particular.
It was good to be alive! I awoke happy every morning and did those
things that pleased me during the day and went to bed at night
contented, in the expectation of a peaceful tomorrow and a future
without anxiety.
“I had had a few flirtations without my heart being touched by any true
passion or wounded by any of the sensations of true love. It is good to
live like that. It is better to love, but it is terrible. And yet those
who love in the ordinary way must experience ardent happiness, though
less than mine possibly, for love came to me in a remarkable manner.
“As I was wealthy, I bought all kinds of old furniture and old
curiosities, and I often thought of the unknown hands that had touched
these objects, of the eyes that had admired them, of the hearts that had
loved them; for one does love things! I sometimes remained hours and
hours looking at a little watch of the last century. It was so tiny, so
pretty with its enamel and gold chasing. And it kept time as on the day
when a woman first bought it, enraptured at owning this dainty trinket.
It had not ceased to vibrate, to live its mechanical life, and it had
kept up its regular tick-tock since the last century. Who had first worn
it on her bosom amid the warmth of her clothing, the heart of the watch
beating beside the heart of the woman? What hand had held it in its warm
fingers, had turned it over and then wiped the enamelled shepherds on
the case to remove the slight moisture from her fingers? What eyes had
watched the hands on its ornamental face for the expected, the beloved,
the sacred hour?
“How I wished I had known her, seen her, the woman who had selected this
exquisite and rare object! She is dead! I am possessed with a longing
for women of former days. I love, from afar, all those who have loved.
The story of those dead and gone loves fills my heart with regrets. Oh,
the beauty, the smiles, the youthful caresses, the hopes! Should not all
that be eternal?
“How I have wept whole nights-thinking of those poor women of former
days, so beautiful, so loving, so sweet, whose arms were extended in an
embrace, and who now are dead! A kiss is immortal! It goes from lips to
lips, from century to century, from age to age. Men receive them, give
them and die.
“The past attracts me, the present terrifies me because the future means
death. I regret all that has gone by. I mourn all who have lived; I
should like to check time, to stop the clock. But time goes, it goes, it
passes, it takes from me each second a little of myself for the
annihilation of to-morrow. And I shall never live again.
“Farewell, ye women of yesterday. I love you!
“But I am not to be pitied. I found her, the one I was waiting for, and
through her I enjoyed inestimable pleasure.
“I was sauntering in Paris on a bright, sunny morning, with a happy
heart and a high step, looking in at the shop windows with the vague
interest of an idler. All at once I noticed in the shop of a dealer in
antiques a piece of Italian furniture of the seventeenth century. It was
very handsome, very rare. I set it down as being the work of a Venetian
artist named Vitelli, who was celebrated in his day.
“I went on my way.
“Why did the remembrance of that piece of furniture haunt me with such
insistence that I retraced my steps? I again stopped before the shop, in
order to take another look at it, and I felt that it tempted me.
“What a singular thing temptation is! One gazes at an object, and,
little by little, it charms you, it disturbs you, it fills your thoughts
as a woman's face might do. The enchantment of it penetrates your being,
a strange enchantment of form, color and appearance of an inanimate
object. And one loves it, one desires it, one wishes to have it. A
longing to own it takes possession of you, gently at first, as though it
were timid, but growing, becoming intense, irresistible.
“And the dealers seem to guess, from your ardent gaze, your secret and
increasing longing.
“I bought this piece of furniture and had it sent home at once. I placed
it in my room.
“Oh, I am sorry for those who do not know the honeymoon of the collector
with the antique he has just purchased. One looks at it tenderly and
passes one's hand over it as if it were human flesh; one comes back to
it every moment, one is always thinking of it, wherever one goes,
whatever one does. The dear recollection of it pursues you in the
street, in society, everywhere; and when you return home at night,
before taking off your gloves or your hat; you go and look at it with
the tenderness of a lover.
“Truly, for eight days I worshipped this piece of furniture. I opened
its doors and pulled out the drawers every few moments. I handled it
with rapture, with all the intense joy of possession.
“But one evening I surmised, while I was feeling the thickness of one of
the panels, that there must be a secret drawer in it: My heart began to
beat, and I spent the night trying to discover this secret cavity.
“I succeeded on the following day by driving a knife into a slit in the
wood. A panel slid back and I saw, spread out on a piece of black
velvet, a magnificent tress of hair.
“Yes, a woman's hair, an immense coil of fair hair, almost red, which
must have been cut off close to the head, tied with a golden cord.
“I stood amazed, trembling, confused. An almost imperceptible perfume,
so ancient that it seemed to be the spirit of a perfume, issued from
this mysterious drawer and this remarkable relic.
“I lifted it gently, almost reverently, and took it out of its hiding
place. It at once unwound in a golden shower that reached to the floor,
dense but light; soft and gleaming like the tail of a comet.
“A strange emotion filled me. What was this? When, how, why had this
hair been shut up in this drawer? What adventure, what tragedy did this
souvenir conceal? Who had cut it off? A lover on a day of farewell, a
husband on a day of revenge, or the one whose head it had graced on the
day of despair?
“Was it as she was about to take the veil that they had cast thither
that love dowry as a pledge to the world of the living? Was it when they
were going to nail down the coffin of the beautiful young corpse that
the one who had adored her had cut off her tresses, the only thing that
he could retain of her, the only living part of her body that would not
suffer decay, the only thing he could still love, and caress, and kiss
in his paroxysms of grief?
“Was it not strange that this tress should have remained as it was in
life, when not an atom of the body on which it grew was in existence?
“It fell over my fingers, tickled the skin with a singular caress, the
caress of a dead woman. It affected me so that I felt as though I should
weep.
“I held it in my hands for a long time, then it seemed as if it
disturbed me, as though something of the soul had remained in it. And I
put it back on the velvet, rusty from age, and pushed in the drawer,
closed the doors of the antique cabinet and went out for a walk to
meditate.
“I walked along, filled with sadness and also with unrest, that unrest
that one feels when in love. I felt as though I must have lived before,
as though I must have known this woman.
“And Villon's lines came to my mind like a sob:
Tell me where, and in what place Is Flora, the beautiful Roman,
Hipparchia and Thais Who was her cousin-german?
Echo answers in the breeze O'er river and lake that blows, Their beauty
was above all praise, But where are last year's snows?
The queen, white as lilies, Who sang as sing the birds, Bertha
Broadfoot, Beatrice, Alice, Ermengarde, princess of Maine, And Joan, the
good Lorraine, Burned by the English at Rouen, Where are they, Virgin
Queen? And where are last year's snows?
“When I got home again I felt an irresistible longing to see my singular
treasure, and I took it out and, as I touched it, I felt a shiver go all
through me.
“For some days, however, I was in my ordinary condition, although the
thought of that tress of hair was always present to my mind.
“Whenever I came into the house I had to see it and take it in my,
hands. I turned the key of the cabinet with the same hesitation that one
opens the door leading to one's beloved, for in my hands and my heart I
felt a confused, singular, constant sensual longing to plunge my hands
in the enchanting golden flood of those dead tresses.
“Then, after I had finished caressing it and had locked the cabinet I
felt as if it were a living thing, shut up in there, imprisoned; and I
longed to see it again. I felt again the imperious desire to take it in
my hands, to touch it, to even feel uncomfortable at the cold, slippery,
irritating, bewildering contact.
“I lived thus for a month or two, I forget how long. It obsessed me,
haunted me. I was happy and tormented by turns, as when one falls in
love, and after the first vows have been exchanged.
“I shut myself in the room with it to feel it on my skin, to bury my
lips in it, to kiss it. I wound it round my face, covered my eyes with
the golden flood so as to see the day gleam through its gold.
“I loved it! Yes, I loved it. I could not be without it nor pass an hour
without looking at it.
“And I waited—I waited—for what? I do not know—For her!
“One night I woke up suddenly, feeling as though I were not alone in my
room.
“I was alone, nevertheless, but I could not go to sleep again, and, as I
was tossing about feverishly, I got up to look at the golden tress. It
seemed softer than usual, more life-like. Do the dead come back? I
almost lost consciousness as I kissed it. I took it back with me to bed
and pressed it to my lips as if it were my sweetheart.
“Do the dead come back? She came back. Yes, I saw her; I held her in my
arms, just as she was in life, tall, fair and round. She came back every
evening—the dead woman, the beautiful, adorable, mysterious unknown.
“My happiness was so great that I could not conceal it. No lover ever
tasted such intense, terrible enjoyment. I loved her so well that I
could not be separated from her. I took her with me always and
everywhere. I walked about the town with her as if she were my wife, and
took her to the theatre, always to a private box. But they saw her—they
guessed—they arrested me. They put me in prison like a criminal. They
took her. Oh, misery!”
Here the manuscript stopped. And as I suddenly raised my astonished eyes
to the doctor a terrific cry, a howl of impotent rage and of exasperated
longing resounded through the asylum.
“Listen,” said the doctor. “We have to douse the obscene madman with
water five times a day. Sergeant Bertrand was the only one who was in
love with the dead.”
Filled with astonishment, horror and pity, I stammered out:
“But—that tress—did it really exist?”
The doctor rose, opened a cabinet full of phials and instruments and
tossed over a long tress of fair hair which flew toward me like a golden
bird.
I shivered at feeling its soft, light touch on my hands. And I sat
there, my heart beating with disgust and desire, disgust as at the
contact of anything accessory to a crime and desire as at the temptation
of some infamous and mysterious thing.
The doctor said as he shrugged his shoulders:
“The mind of man is capable of anything.”
ON THE RIVER
I rented a little country house last summer on the banks of the Seine,
several leagues from Paris, and went out there to sleep every evening.
After a few days I made the acquaintance of one of my neighbors, a man
between thirty and forty, who certainly was the most curious specimen I
ever met. He was an old boating man, and crazy about boating. He was
always beside the water, on the water, or in the water. He must have
been born in a boat, and he will certainly die in a boat at the last.
One evening as we were walking along the banks of the Seine I asked him
to tell me some stories about his life on the water. The good man at
once became animated, his whole expression changed, he became eloquent,
almost poetical. There was in his heart one great passion, an absorbing,
irresistible passion-the river.
Ah, he said to me, how many memories I have, connected with that river
that you see flowing beside us! You people who live in streets know
nothing about the river. But listen to a fisherman as he mentions the
word. To him it is a mysterious thing, profound, unknown, a land of
mirages and phantasmagoria, where one sees by night things that do not
exist, hears sounds that one does not recognize, trembles without
knowing why, as in passing through a cemetery—and it is, in fact, the
most sinister of cemeteries, one in which one has no tomb.
The land seems limited to the river boatman, and on dark nights, when
there is no moon, the river seems limitless. A sailor has not the same
feeling for the sea. It is often remorseless and cruel, it is true; but
it shrieks, it roars, it is honest, the great sea; while the river is
silent and perfidious. It does not speak, it flows along without a
sound; and this eternal motion of flowing water is more terrible to me
than the high waves of the ocean.
Dreamers maintain that the sea hides in its bosom vast tracts of blue
where those who are drowned roam among the big fishes, amid strange
forests and crystal grottoes. The river has only black depths where one
rots in the slime. It is beautiful, however, when it sparkles in the
light of the rising sun and gently laps its banks covered with
whispering reeds.
The poet says, speaking of the ocean,
“O waves, what mournful tragedies ye know —Deep waves, the dread of
kneeling mothers' hearts! Ye tell them to each other as ye roll On
flowing tide, and this it is that gives The sad despairing tones unto
your voice As on ye roll at eve by mounting tide.”
Well, I think that the stories whispered by the slender reeds, with
their little soft voices, must be more sinister than the lugubrious
tragedies told by the roaring of the waves.
But as you have asked for some of my recollections, I will tell you of a
singular adventure that happened to me ten years ago.
I was living, as I am now, in Mother Lafon's house, and one of my
closest friends, Louis Bernet who has now given up boating, his low
shoes and his bare neck, to go into the Supreme Court, was living in the
village of C., two leagues further down the river. We dined together
every day, sometimes at his house, sometimes at mine.
One evening as I was coming home along and was pretty tired, rowing with
difficulty my big boat, a twelve-footer, which I always took out at
night, I stopped a few moments to draw breath near the reed-covered
point yonder, about two hundred metres from the railway bridge.
It was a magnificent night, the moon shone brightly, the river gleamed,
the air was calm and soft. This peacefulness tempted me. I thought to
myself that it would be pleasant to smoke a pipe in this spot. I took up
my anchor and cast it into the river.
The boat floated downstream with the current, to the end of the chain,
and then stopped, and I seated myself in the stern on my sheepskin and
made myself as comfortable as possible. There was not a sound to be
heard, except that I occasionally thought I could perceive an almost
imperceptible lapping of the water against the bank, and I noticed
taller groups of reeds which assumed strange shapes and seemed, at
times, to move.
The river was perfectly calm, but I felt myself affected by the unusual
silence that surrounded me. All the creatures, frogs and toads, those
nocturnal singers of the marsh, were silent.
Suddenly a frog croaked to my right, and close beside me. I shuddered.
It ceased, and I heard nothing more, and resolved to smoke, to soothe my
mind. But, although I was a noted colorer of pipes, I could not smoke;
at the second draw I was nauseated, and gave up trying. I began to sing.
The sound of my voice was distressing to me. So I lay still, but
presently the slight motion of the boat disturbed me. It seemed to me as
if she were making huge lurches, from bank to bank of the river,
touching each bank alternately. Then I felt as though an invisible
force, or being, were drawing her to the surface of the water and
lifting her out, to let her fall again. I was tossed about as in a
tempest. I heard noises around me. I sprang to my feet with a single
bound. The water was glistening, all was calm.
I saw that my nerves were somewhat shaky, and I resolved to leave the
spot. I pulled the anchor chain, the boat began to move; then I felt a
resistance. I pulled harder, the anchor did not come up; it had caught
on something at the bottom of the river and I could not raise it. I
began pulling again, but all in vain. Then, with my oars, I turned the
boat with its head up stream to change the position of the anchor. It
was no use, it was still caught. I flew into a rage and shook the chain
furiously. Nothing budged. I sat down, disheartened, and began to
reflect on my situation. I could not dream of breaking this chain, or
detaching it from the boat, for it was massive and was riveted at the
bows to a piece of wood as thick as my arm. However, as the weather was
so fine I thought that it probably would not be long before some
fisherman came to my aid. My ill-luck had quieted me. I sat down and was
able, at length, to smoke my pipe. I had a bottle of rum; I drank two or
three glasses, and was able to laugh at the situation. It was very warm;
so that, if need be, I could sleep out under the stars without any great
harm.
All at once there was a little knock at the side of the boat. I gave a
start, and a cold sweat broke out all over me. The noise was, doubtless,
caused by some piece of wood borne along by the current, but that was
enough, and I again became a prey to a strange nervous agitation. I
seized the chain and tensed my muscles in a desperate effort. The anchor
held firm. I sat down again, exhausted.
The river had slowly become enveloped in a thick white fog which lay
close to the water, so that when I stood up I could see neither the
river, nor my feet, nor my boat; but could perceive only the tops of the
reeds, and farther off in the distance the plain, lying white in the
moonlight, with big black patches rising up from it towards the sky,
which were formed by groups of Italian poplars. I was as if buried to
the waist in a cloud of cotton of singular whiteness, and all sorts of
strange fancies came into my mind. I thought that someone was trying to
climb into my boat which I could no longer distinguish, and that the
river, hidden by the thick fog, was full of strange creatures which were
swimming all around me. I felt horribly uncomfortable, my forehead felt
as if it had a tight band round it, my heart beat so that it almost
suffocated me, and, almost beside myself, I thought of swimming away
from the place. But then, again, the very idea made me tremble with
fear. I saw myself, lost, going by guesswork in this heavy fog,
struggling about amid the grasses and reeds which I could not escape, my
breath rattling with fear, neither seeing the bank, nor finding my boat;
and it seemed as if I would feel myself dragged down by the feet to the
bottom of these black waters.
In fact, as I should have had to ascend the stream at least five hundred
metres before finding a spot free from grasses and rushes where I could
land, there were nine chances to one that I could not find my way in the
fog and that I should drown, no matter how well I could swim.
I tried to reason with myself. My will made me resolve not to be afraid,
but there was something in me besides my will, and that other thing was
afraid. I asked myself what there was to be afraid of. My brave “ego”
ridiculed my coward “ego,” and never did I realize, as on that day, the
existence in us of two rival personalities, one desiring a thing, the
other resisting, and each winning the day in turn.
This stupid, inexplicable fear increased, and became terror. I remained
motionless, my eyes staring, my ears on the stretch with expectation. Of
what? I did not know, but it must be something terrible. I believe if it
had occurred to a fish to jump out of the water, as often happens,
nothing more would have been required to make me fall over, stiff and
unconscious.
However, by a violent effort I succeeded in becoming almost rational
again. I took up my bottle of rum and took several pulls. Then an idea
came to me, and I began to shout with all my might towards all the
points of the compass in succession. When my throat was absolutely
paralyzed I listened. A dog was howling, at a great distance.
I drank some more rum and stretched myself out at the bottom of the
boat. I remained there about an hour, perhaps two, not sleeping, my eyes
wide open, with nightmares all about me. I did not dare to rise, and yet
I intensely longed to do so. I delayed it from moment to moment. I said
to myself: “Come, get up!” and I was afraid to move. At last I raised
myself with infinite caution as though my life depended on the slightest
sound that I might make; and looked over the edge of the boat. I was
dazzled by the most marvellous, the most astonishing sight that it is
possible to see. It was one of those phantasmagoria of fairyland, one of
those sights described by travellers on their return from distant lands,
whom we listen to without believing.
The fog which, two hours before, had floated on the water, had gradually
cleared off and massed on the banks, leaving the river absolutely clear;
while it formed on either bank an uninterrupted wall six or seven metres
high, which shone in the moonlight with the dazzling brilliance of snow.
One saw nothing but the river gleaming with light between these two
white mountains; and high above my head sailed the great full moon, in
the midst of a bluish, milky sky.
All the creatures in the water were awake. The frogs croaked furiously,
while every few moments I heard, first to the right and then to the
left, the abrupt, monotonous and mournful metallic note of the
bullfrogs. Strange to say, I was no longer afraid. I was in the midst of
such an unusual landscape that the most remarkable things would not have
astonished me.
How long this lasted I do not know, for I ended by falling asleep. When
I opened my eyes the moon had gone down and the sky was full of clouds.
The water lapped mournfully, the wind was blowing, it was pitch dark. I
drank the rest of the rum, then listened, while I trembled, to the
rustling of the reeds and the foreboding sound of the river. I tried to
see, but could not distinguish my boat, nor even my hands, which I held
up close to my eyes.
Little by little, however, the blackness became less intense. All at
once I thought I noticed a shadow gliding past, quite near me. I
shouted, a voice replied; it was a fisherman. I called him; he came near
and I told him of my ill-luck. He rowed his boat alongside of mine and,
together, we pulled at the anchor chain. The anchor did not move. Day
came, gloomy gray, rainy and cold, one of those days that bring one
sorrows and misfortunes. I saw another boat. We hailed it. The man on
board of her joined his efforts to ours, and gradually the anchor
yielded. It rose, but slowly, slowly, loaded down by a considerable
weight. At length we perceived a black mass and we drew it on board. It
was the corpse of an old women with a big stone round her neck.
THE CRIPPLE
The following adventure happened to me about 1882. I had just taken the
train and settled down in a corner, hoping that I should be left alone,
when the door suddenly opened again and I heard a voice say: “Take care,
monsieur, we are just at a crossing; the step is very high.”
Another voice answered: “That's all right, Laurent, I have a firm hold
on the handle.”
Then a head appeared, and two hands seized the leather straps hanging on
either side of the door and slowly pulled up an enormous body, whose
feet striking on the step, sounded like two canes. When the man had
hoisted his torso into the compartment I noticed, at the loose edge of
his trousers, the end of a wooden leg, which was soon followed by its
mate. A head appeared behind this traveller and asked; “Are you all
right, monsieur?”
“Yes, my boy.”
“Then here are your packages and crutches.”
And a servant, who looked like an old soldier, climbed in, carrying in
his arms a stack of bundles wrapped in black and yellow papers and
carefully tied; he placed one after the other in the net over his
master's head. Then he said: “There, monsieur, that is all. There are
five of them—the candy, the doll the drum, the gun, and the pate de
foies gras.”
“Very well, my boy.”
“Thank you, Laurent; good health!”
The man closed the door and walked away, and I looked at my neighbor. He
was about thirty-five, although his hair was almost white; he wore the
ribbon of the Legion of Honor; he had a heavy mustache and was quite
stout, with the stoutness of a strong and active man who is kept
motionless on account of some infirmity. He wiped his brow, sighed, and,
looking me full in the face, he asked: “Does smoking annoy you,
monsieur?”
“No, monsieur.”
Surely I knew that eye, that voice, that face. But when and where had I
seen them? I had certainly met that man, spoken to him, shaken his hand.
That was a long, long time ago. It was lost in the haze wherein the mind
seems to feel around blindly for memories and pursues them like fleeing
phantoms without being able to seize them. He, too, was observing me,
staring me out of countenance, with the persistence of a man who
remembers slightly but not completely. Our eyes, embarrassed by this
persistent contact, turned away; then, after a few minutes, drawn
together again by the obscure and tenacious will of working memory, they
met once more, and I said: “Monsieur, instead of staring at each other
for an hour or so, would it not be better to try to discover where we
have known each other?”
My neighbor answered graciously: “You are quite right, monsieur.”
I named myself: “I am Henri Bonclair, a magistrate.”
He hesitated for a few minutes; then, with the vague look and voice
which accompany great mental tension, he said: “Oh, I remember
perfectly. I met you twelve years ago, before the war, at the Poincels!”
“Yes, monsieur. Ah! Ah! You are Lieutenant Revaliere?”
“Yes. I was Captain Revaliere even up to the time when I lost my feet
—both of them together from one cannon ball.”
Now that we knew each other's identity we looked at each other again. I
remembered perfectly the handsome, slender youth who led the cotillons
with such frenzied agility and gracefulness that he had been nicknamed
“the fury.” Going back into the dim, distant past, I recalled a story
which I had heard and forgotten, one of those stories to which one
listens but forgets, and which leave but a faint impression upon the
memory.
There was something about love in it. Little by little the shadows
cleared up, and the face of a young girl appeared before my eyes. Then
her name struck me with the force of an explosion: Mademoiselle de
Mandel. I remembered everything now. It was indeed a love story, but
quite commonplace. The young girl loved this young man, and when I had
met them there was already talk of the approaching wedding. The youth
seemed to be very much in love, very happy.
I raised my eye to the net, where all the packages which had been
brought in by the servant were trembling from the motion of the train,
and the voice of the servant came back to me, as if he had just finished
speaking. He had said: “There, monsieur, that is all. There are five of
them: the candy, the doll, the drum, the gun, and the pate de foies
gras.”
Then, in a second, a whole romance unfolded itself in my head. It was
like all those which I had already read, where the young lady married
notwithstanding the catastrophe, whether physical or financial;
therefore, this officer who had been maimed in the war had returned,
after the campaign, to the young girl who had given him her promise, and
she had kept her word.
I considered that very beautiful, but simple, just as one, considers
simple all devotions and climaxes in books or in plays. It always seems,
when one reads or listens to these stories of magnanimity, that one
could sacrifice one's self with enthusiastic pleasure and overwhelming
joy. But the following day, when an unfortunate friend comes to borrow
some money, there is a strange revulsion of feeling.
But, suddenly, another supposition, less poetic and more realistic,
replaced the first one. Perhaps he had married before the war, before
this frightful accident, and she, in despair and resignation, had been
forced to receive, care for, cheer, and support this husband, who had
departed, a handsome man, and had returned without his feet, a frightful
wreck, forced into immobility, powerless anger, and fatal obesity.
Was he happy or in torture? I was seized with an irresistible desire to
know his story, or, at least, the principal points, which would permit
me to guess that which he could not or would not tell me. Still thinking
the matter over, I began talking to him. We had exchanged a few
commonplace words; and I raised my eyes to the net, and thought: “He
must have three children: the bonbons are for his wife, the doll for his
little girl, the drum and the gun for his sons, and this pate de foies
gras for himself.”
Suddenly I asked him: “Are you a father, monsieur?”
He answered: “No, monsieur.”
I suddenly felt confused, as if I had been guilty of some breach of
etiquette, and I continued: “I beg your pardon. I had thought that you
were when I heard your servant speaking about the toys. One listens and
draws conclusions unconsciously.”
He smiled and then murmured: “No, I am not even married. I am still at
the preliminary stage.”
I pretended suddenly to remember, and said:
“Oh! that's true! When I knew you, you were engaged to Mademoiselle de
Mandel, I believe.”
“Yes, monsieur, your memory is excellent.”
I grew very bold and added: “I also seem to remember hearing that
Mademoiselle de Mandel married Monsieur—Monsieur—”
He calmly mentioned the name: “Monsieur de Fleurel.”
“Yes, that's it! I remember it was on that occasion that I heard of your
wound.”
I looked him full in the face, and he blushed. His full face, which was
already red from the oversupply of blood, turned crimson. He answered
quickly, with a sudden ardor of a man who is pleading a cause which is
lost in his mind and in his heart, but which he does not wish to admit.
“It is wrong, monsieur, to couple my name with that of Madame de
Fleurel. When I returned from the war-without my feet, alas! I never
would have permitted her to become my wife. Was it possible? When one
marries, monsieur, it is not in order to parade one's generosity; it is
in order to live every day, every hour, every minute, every second
beside a man; and if this man is disfigured, as I am, it is a death
sentence to marry him! Oh, I understand, I admire all sacrifices and
devotions when they have a limit, but I do not admit that a woman should
give up her whole life, all joy, all her dreams, in order to satisfy the
admiration of the gallery. When I hear, on the floor of my room, the
tapping of my wooden legs and of my crutches, I grow angry enough to
strangle my servant. Do you think that I would permit a woman to do what
I myself am unable to tolerate? And, then, do you think that my stumps
are pretty?”
He was silent. What could I say? He certainly was right. Could I blame
her, hold her in contempt, even say that she was wrong? No. However, the
end which conformed to the rule, to the truth, did not satisfy my poetic
appetite. These heroic deeds demand a beautiful sacrifice, which seemed
to be lacking, and I felt a certain disappointment. I suddenly asked:
“Has Madame de Fleurel any children?”
“Yes, one girl and two boys. It is for them that I am bringing these
toys. She and her husband are very kind to me.”
The train was going up the incline to Saint-Germain. It passed through
the tunnels, entered the station, and stopped. I was about to offer my
arm to the wounded officer, in order to help him descend, when two hands
were stretched up to him through the open door.
“Hello! my dear Revaliere!”
“Ah! Hello, Fleurel!”
Standing behind the man, the woman, still beautiful, was smiling and
waving her hands to him. A little girl, standing beside her, was jumping
for joy, and two young boys were eagerly watching the drum and the gun,
which were passing from the car into their father's hands.
When the cripple was on the ground, all the children kissed him. Then
they set off, the little girl holding in her hand the small varnished
rung of a crutch, just as she might walk beside her big friend and hold
his thumb.
A STROLL
When Old Man Leras, bookkeeper for Messieurs Labuze and Company, left
the store, he stood for a minute bewildered at the glory of the setting
sun. He had worked all day in the yellow light of a small jet of gas,
far in the back of the store, on a narrow court, as deep as a well. The
little room where he had been spending his days for forty years was so
dark that even in the middle of summer one could hardly see without
gaslight from eleven until three.
It was always damp and cold, and from this hole on which his window
opened came the musty odor of a sewer.
For forty years Monsieur Leras had been arriving every morning in this
prison at eight o'clock, and he would remain there until seven at night,
bending over his books, writing with the industry of a good clerk.
He was now making three thousand francs a year, having started at
fifteen hundred. He had remained a bachelor, as his means did not allow
him the luxury of a wife, and as he had never enjoyed anything, he
desired nothing. From time to time, however, tired of this continuous
and monotonous work, he formed a platonic wish: “Gad! If I only had an
income of fifteen thousand francs, I would take life easy.”
He had never taken life easy, as he had never had anything but his
monthly salary. His life had been uneventful, without emotions, without
hopes. The faculty of dreaming with which every one is blessed had never
developed in the mediocrity of his ambitions.
When he was twenty-one he entered the employ of Messieurs Labuze and
Company. And he had never left them.
In 1856 he had lost his father and then his mother in 1859. Since then
the only incident in his life was when he moved, in 1868, because his
landlord had tried to raise his rent.
Every day his alarm clock, with a frightful noise of rattling chains,
made him spring out of bed at 6 o'clock precisely.
Twice, however, this piece of mechanism had been out of order—once in
1866 and again in 1874; he had never been able to find out the reason
why. He would dress, make his bed, sweep his room, dust his chair and
the top of his bureau. All this took him an hour and a half.
Then he would go out, buy a roll at the Lahure Bakery, in which he had
seen eleven different owners without the name ever changing, and he
would eat this roll on the way to the office.
His entire existence had been spent in the narrow, dark office, which
was still decorated with the same wall paper. He had entered there as a
young man, as assistant to Monsieur Brument, and with the desire to
replace him.
He had taken his place and wished for nothing more.
The whole harvest of memories which other men reap in their span of
years, the unexpected events, sweet or tragic loves, adventurous
journeys, all the occurrences of a free existence, all these things had
remained unknown to him.
Days, weeks, months, seasons, years, all were alike to him. He got up
every day at the same hour, started out, arrived at the office, ate
luncheon, went away, had dinner and went to bed without ever
interrupting the regular monotony of similar actions, deeds and
thoughts.
Formerly he used to look at his blond mustache and wavy hair in the
little round mirror left by his predecessor. Now, every evening before
leaving, he would look at his white mustache and bald head in the same
mirror. Forty years had rolled by, long and rapid, dreary as a day of
sadness and as similar as the hours of a sleepless night. Forty years of
which nothing remained, not even a memory, not even a misfortune, since
the death of his parents. Nothing.
That day Monsieur Leras stood by the door, dazzled at the brilliancy of
the setting sun; and instead of returning home he decided to take a
little stroll before dinner, a thing which happened to him four or five
times a year.
He reached the boulevards, where people were streaming along under the
green trees. It was a spring evening, one of those first warm and
pleasant evenings which fill the heart with the joy of life.
Monsieur Leras went along with his mincing old man's step; he was going
along with joy in his heart, at peace with the world. He reached the
Champs-Elysees, and he continued to walk, enlivened by the sight of the
young people trotting along.
The whole sky was aflame; the Arc de Triomphe stood out against the
brilliant background of the horizon, like a giant surrounded by fire. As
he approached the immense monument, the old bookkeeper noticed that he
was hungry, and he went into a wine dealer's for dinner.
The meal was served in front of the store, on the sidewalk. It consisted
of some mutton, salad and asparagus. It was the best dinner that
Monsieur Leras had had in a long time. He washed down his cheese with a
small bottle of burgundy, had his after-dinner cup of coffee, a thing
which he rarely took, and finally a little pony of brandy.
When he had paid he felt quite youthful, even a little moved. And he
said to himself: “What a fine evening! I will continue my stroll as far
as the entrance to the Bois de Boulogne. It will do me good.” He set
out. An old tune which one of his neighbors used to sing kept returning
to his mind. He kept on humming it over and over again. A hot, still
night had fallen over Paris. Monsieur Leras walked along the Avenue du
Bois de Boulogne and watched the cabs drive by. They kept coming with
their shining lights, one behind the other, giving him a glimpse of the
couples inside, the women in their light dresses and the men dressed in
black.
It was one long procession of lovers, riding under the warm, starlit
sky. They kept on coming in rapid succession. They passed by in the
carriages, silent, side by side, lost in their dreams, in the emotion of
desire, in the anticipation of the approaching embrace. The warm shadows
seemed to be full of floating kisses. A sensation of tenderness filled
the air. All these carriages full of tender couples, all these people
intoxicated with the same idea, with the same thought, seemed to give
out a disturbing, subtle emanation.
At last Monsieur Leras grew a little tired of walking, and he sat down
on a bench to watch these carriages pass by with their burdens of love.
Almost immediately a woman walked up to him and sat down beside him.
“Good-evening, papa,” she said.
He answered: “Madame, you are mistaken.”
She slipped her arm through his, saying: “Come along, now; don't be
foolish. Listen——”
He arose and walked away, with sadness in his heart. A few yards away
another woman walked up to him and asked: “Won't you sit down beside
me?” He said: “What makes you take up this life?”
She stood before him and in an altered, hoarse, angry voice exclaimed:
“Well, it isn't for the fun of it, anyhow!”
He insisted in a gentle voice: “Then what makes you?”
She grumbled: “I've got to live! Foolish question!” And she walked away,
humming.
Monsieur Leras stood there bewildered. Other women were passing near
him, speaking to him and calling to him. He felt as though he were
enveloped in darkness by something disagreeable.
He sat down again on a bench. The carriages were still rolling by. He
thought: “I should have done better not to come here; I feel all upset.”
He began to think of all this venal or passionate love, of all these
kisses, sold or given, which were passing by in front of him. Love! He
scarcely knew it. In his lifetime he had only known two or three women,
his means forcing him to live a quiet life, and he looked back at the
life which he had led, so different from everybody else, so dreary, so
mournful, so empty.
Some people are really unfortunate. And suddenly, as though a veil had
been torn from his eyes, he perceived the infinite misery, the monotony
of his existence: the past, present and future misery; his last day
similar to his first one, with nothing before him, behind him or about
him, nothing in his heart or any place.
The stream of carriages was still going by. In the rapid passage of the
open carriage he still saw the two silent, loving creatures. It seemed
to him that the whole of humanity was flowing on before him, intoxicated
with joy, pleasure and happiness. He alone was looking on. To-morrow he
would again be alone, always alone, more so than any one else. He stood
up, took a few steps, and suddenly he felt as tired as though he had
taken a long journey on foot, and he sat down on the next bench.
What was he waiting for? What was he hoping for? Nothing. He was
thinking of how pleasant it must be in old age to return home and find
the little children. It is pleasant to grow old when one is surrounded
by those beings who owe their life to you, who love you, who caress you,
who tell you charming and foolish little things which warm your heart
and console you for everything.
And, thinking of his empty room, clean and sad, where no one but himself
ever entered, a feeling of distress filled his soul; and the place
seemed to him more mournful even than his little office. Nobody ever
came there; no one ever spoke in it. It was dead, silent, without the
echo of a human voice. It seems as though walls retain something of the
people who live within them, something of their manner, face and voice.
The very houses inhabited by happy families are gayer than the dwellings
of the unhappy. His room was as barren of memories as his life. And the
thought of returning to this place, all alone, of getting into his bed,
of again repeating all the duties and actions of every evening, this
thought terrified him. As though to escape farther from this sinister
home, and from the time when he would have to return to it, he arose and
walked along a path to a wooded corner, where he sat down on the grass.
About him, above him, everywhere, he heard a continuous, tremendous,
confused rumble, composed of countless and different noises, a vague and
throbbing pulsation of life: the life breath of Paris, breathing like a
giant.
The sun was already high and shed a flood of light on the Bois de
Boulogne. A few carriages were beginning to drive about and people were
appearing on horseback.
A couple was walking through a deserted alley.
Suddenly the young woman raised her eyes and saw something brown in the
branches. Surprised and anxious, she raised her hand, exclaiming: “Look!
what is that?”
Then she shrieked and fell into the arms of her companion, who was
forced to lay her on the ground.
The policeman who had been called cut down an old man who had hung
himself with his suspenders.
Examination showed that he had died the evening before. Papers found on
him showed that he was a bookkeeper for Messieurs Labuze and Company and
that his name was Leras.
His death was attributed to suicide, the cause of which could not be
suspected. Perhaps a sudden access of madness!
ALEXANDRE
At four o'clock that day, as on every other day, Alexandre rolled the
three-wheeled chair for cripples up to the door of the little house;
then, in obedience to the doctor's orders, he would push his old and
infirm mistress about until six o'clock.
When he had placed the light vehicle against the step, just at the place
where the old lady could most easily enter it, he went into the house;
and soon a furious, hoarse old soldier's voice was heard cursing inside
the house: it issued from the master, the retired ex-captain of
infantry, Joseph Maramballe.
Then could be heard the noise of doors being slammed, chairs being
pushed about, and hasty footsteps; then nothing more. After a few
seconds, Alexandre reappeared on the threshold, supporting with all his
strength Madame Maramballe, who was exhausted from the exertion of
descending the stairs. When she was at last settled in the rolling
chair, Alexandre passed behind it, grasped the handle, and set out
toward the river.
Thus they crossed the little town every day amid the respectful
greeting, of all. These bows were perhaps meant as much for the servant
as for the mistress, for if she was loved and esteemed by all, this old
trooper, with his long, white, patriarchal beard, was considered a model
domestic.
The July sun was beating down unmercifully on the street, bathing the
low houses in its crude and burning light. Dogs were sleeping on the
sidewalk in the shade of the houses, and Alexandre, a little out of
breath, hastened his footsteps in order sooner to arrive at the avenue
which leads to the water.
Madame Maramballe was already slumbering under her white parasol, the
point of which sometimes grazed along the man's impassive face. As soon
as they had reached the Allee des Tilleuls, she awoke in the shade of
the trees, and she said in a kindly voice: “Go more slowly, my poor boy;
you will kill yourself in this heat.”
Along this path, completely covered by arched linden trees, the Mavettek
flowed in its winding bed bordered by willows.
The gurgling of the eddies and the splashing of the little waves against
the rocks lent to the walk the charming music of babbling water and the
freshness of damp air. Madame Maramballe inhaled with deep delight the
humid charm of this spot and then murmured: “Ah! I feel better now! But
he wasn't in a good humor to-day.”
Alexandre answered: “No, madame.”
For thirty-five years he had been in the service of this couple, first
as officer's orderly, then as simple valet who did not wish to leave his
masters; and for the last six years, every afternoon, he had been
wheeling his mistress about through the narrow streets of the town. From
this long and devoted service, and then from this daily tete-a-tete, a
kind of familiarity arose between the old lady and the devoted servant,
affectionate on her part, deferential on his.
They talked over the affairs of the house exactly as if they were
equals. Their principal subject of conversation and of worry was the bad
disposition of the captain, soured by a long career which had begun with
promise, run along without promotion, end ended without glory.
Madame Maramballe continued: “He certainly was not in a good humor
today. This happens too often since he has left the service.”
And Alexandre, with a sigh, completed his mistress's thoughts, “Oh,
madame might say that it happens every day and that it also happened
before leaving the army.”
“That is true. But the poor man has been so unfortunate. He began with a
brave deed, which obtained for him the Legion of Honor at the age of
twenty; and then from twenty to fifty he was not able to rise higher
than captain, whereas at the beginning he expected to retire with at
least the rank of colonel.”
“Madame might also admit that it was his fault. If he had not always
been as cutting as a whip, his superiors would have loved and protected
him better. Harshness is of no use; one should try to please if one
wishes to advance. As far as his treatment of us is concerned, it is
also our fault, since we are willing to remain with him, but with others
it's different.”
Madame Maramballe was thinking. Oh, for how many years had she thus been
thinking of the brutality of her husband, whom she had married long ago
because he was a handsome officer, decorated quite young, and full of
promise, so they said! What mistakes one makes in life!
She murmured: “Let us stop a while, my poor Alexandre, and you rest on
that bench:”
It was a little worm-eaten bench, placed at a turn in the alley. Every
time they came in this direction Alexandre was accustomed to making a
short pause on this seat.
He sat down and with a proud and familiar gesture he took his beautiful
white beard in his hand, and, closing his, fingers over it, ran them
down to the point, which he held for a minute at the pit of his stomach,
as if once more to verify the length of this growth.
Madame Maramballe continued: “I married him; it is only just and natural
that I should bear his injustice; but what I do not understand is why
you also should have supported it, my good Alexandre!”
He merely shrugged his shoulders and answered: “Oh! I—madame.”
She added: “Really. I have often wondered. When I married him you were
his orderly and you could hardly do otherwise than endure him. But why
did you remain with us, who pay you so little and who treat you so
badly, when you could have done as every one else does, settle down,
marry, have a family?”
He answered: “Oh, madame! with me it's different.”
Then he was silent; but he kept pulling his beard as if he were ringing
a bell within him, as if he were trying to pull it out, and he rolled
his eyes like a man who is greatly embarrassed.
Madame Maramballe was following her own train of thought: “You are not a
peasant. You have an education—”
He interrupted her proudly: “I studied surveying, madame.”
“Then why did you stay with us, and blast your prospects?”
He stammered: “That's it! that's it! it's the fault of my dispositton.”
“How so, of your disposition?”
“Yes, when I become attached to a person I become attached to him,
that's all.”
She began to laugh: “You are not going to try to tell me that
Maramballe's sweet disposition caused you to become attached to him for
life.”
He was fidgeting about on his bench visibly embarrassed, and he muttered
behind his long beard:
“It was not he, it was you!”
The old lady, who had a sweet face, with a snowy line of curly white
hair between her forehead and her bonnet, turned around in her chair and
observed her servant with a surprised look, exclaiming: “I, my poor
Alexandre! How so?”
He began to look up in the air, then to one side, then toward the
distance, turning his head as do timid people when forced to admit
shameful secrets. At last he exclaimed, with the courage of a trooper
who is ordered to the line of fire: “You see, it's this way—the first
time I brought a letter to mademoiselle from the lieutenant,
mademoiselle gave me a franc and a smile, and that settled it.”
Not understanding well, she questioned him “Explain yourself.”
Then he cried out, like a malefactor who is admitting a fatal crime: “I
had a sentiment for madame! There!”
She answered nothing, stopped looking at him, hung her head, and
thought. She was good, full of justice, gentleness, reason, and
tenderness. In a second she saw the immense devotion of this poor
creature, who had given up everything in order to live beside her,
without saying anything. And she felt as if she could cry. Then, with a
sad but not angry expression, she said: “Let us return home.”
He rose and began to push the wheeled chair.
As they approached the village they saw Captain Maramballe coming toward
them. As soon as he joined them he asked his wife, with a visible desire
of getting angry: “What have we for dinner?”
“Some chicken with flageolets.”
He lost his temper: “Chicken! chicken! always chicken! By all that's
holy, I've had enough chicken! Have you no ideas in your head, that you
make me eat chicken every day?”
She answered, in a resigned tone: “But, my dear, you know that the
doctor has ordered it for you. It's the best thing for your stomach. If
your stomach were well, I could give you many things which I do not dare
set before you now.”
Then, exasperated, he planted himself in front of Alexandre, exclaiming:
“Well, if my stomach is out of order it's the fault of that brute. For
thirty-five years he has been poisoning me with his abominable cooking.”
Madame Maramballe suddenly turned about completely, in order to see the
old domestic. Their eyes met, and in this single glance they both said
“Thank you!” to each other.
THE LOG
The drawing-room was small, full of heavy draperies and discreetly
fragrant. A large fire burned in the grate and a solitary lamp at one
end of the mantelpiece threw a soft light on the two persons who were
talking.
She, the mistress of the house, was an old lady with white hair, but one
of those old ladies whose unwrinkled skin is as smooth as the finest
paper, and scented, impregnated with perfume, with the delicate essences
which she had used in her bath for so many years.
He was a very old friend, who had never married, a constant friend, a
companion in the journey of life, but nothing more.
They had not spoken for about a minute, and were both looking at the
fire, dreaming of no matter what, in one of those moments of friendly
silence between people who have no need to be constantly talking in
order to be happy together, when suddenly a large log, a stump covered
with burning roots, fell out. It fell over the firedogs into the
drawing-room and rolled on to the carpet, scattering great sparks around
it. The old lady, with a little scream, sprang to her feet to run away,
while he kicked the log back on to the hearth and stamped out all the
burning sparks with his boots.
When the disaster was remedied, there was a strong smell of burning,
and, sitting down opposite to his friend, the man looked at her with a
smile and said, as he pointed to the log:
“That is the reason why I never married.”
She looked at him in astonishment, with the inquisitive gaze of women
who wish to know everything, that eye which women have who are no longer
very young,—in which a complex, and often roguish, curiosity is
reflected, and she asked:
“How so?”
“Oh, it is a long story,” he replied; “a rather sad and unpleasant
story.
“My old friends were often surprised at the coldness which suddenly
sprang up between one of my best friends whose Christian name was
Julien, and myself. They could not understand how two such intimate and
inseparable friends, as we had been, could suddenly become almost
strangers to one another, and I will tell you the reason of it.
“He and I used to live together at one time. We were never apart, and
the friendship that united us seemed so strong that nothing could break
it.
“One evening when he came home, he told me that he was going to get
married, and it gave me a shock as if he had robbed me or betrayed me.
When a man's friend marries, it is all over between them. The jealous
affection of a woman, that suspicious, uneasy and carnal affection, will
not tolerate the sturdy and frank attachment, that attachment of the
mind, of the heart, and that mutual confidence which exists between two
men.
“You see, however great the love may be that unites them a man and a
woman are always strangers in mind and intellect; they remain
belligerents, they belong to different races. There must always be a
conqueror and a conquered, a master and a slave; now the one, now the
other—they are never two equals. They press each other's hands, those
hands trembling with amorous passion; but they never press them with a
long, strong, loyal pressure, with that pressure which seems to open
hearts and to lay them bare in a burst of sincere, strong, manly
affection. Philosophers of old, instead of marrying, and procreating as
a consolation for their old age children, who would abandon them, sought
for a good, reliable friend, and grew old with him in that communion of
thought which can only exist between men.
“Well, my friend Julien married. His wife was pretty, charming, a
little, curly-haired blonde, plump and lively, who seemed to worship
him. At first I went but rarely to their house, feeling myself de trop.
But, somehow, they attracted me to their home; they were constantly
inviting me, and seemed very fond of me. Consequently, by degrees, I
allowed myself to be allured by the charm of their life. I often dined
with them, and frequently, when I returned home at night, thought that I
would do as he had done, and get married, as my empty house now seemed
very dull.
“They appeared to be very much in love, and were never apart.
“Well, one evening Julien wrote and asked me to go to dinner, and I
naturally went.
“'My dear fellow,' he said, 'I must go out directly afterward on
business, and I shall not be back until eleven o'clock; but I shall be
back at eleven precisely, and I reckon on you to keep Bertha company.'
“The young woman smiled.
“'It was my idea,' she said, 'to send for you.'
“I held out my hand to her.
“'You are as nice as ever, I said, and I felt a long, friendly pressure
of my fingers, but I paid no attention to it; so we sat down to dinner,
and at eight o'clock Julien went out.
“As soon as he had gone, a kind of strange embarrassment immediately
seemed to arise between his wife and me. We had never been alone
together yet, and in spite of our daily increasing intimacy, this tete-
a-tete placed us in a new position. At first I spoke vaguely of those
indifferent matters with which one fills up an embarrassing silence, but
she did not reply, and remained opposite to me with her head down in an
undecided manner, as if she were thinking over some difficult subject,
and as I was at a loss for small talk, I held my tongue. It is
surprising how hard it is at times to find anything to say.
“And then also I felt something in the air, something I could not
express, one of those mysterious premonitions that warn one of another
person's secret intentions in regard to yourself, whether they be good
or evil.
“That painful silence lasted some time, and then Bertha said to me:
“'Will you kindly put a log on the fire for it is going out.'
“So I opened the box where the wood was kept, which was placed just
where yours is, took out the largest log and put it on top of the
others, which were three parts burned, and then silence again reigned in
the room.
“In a few minutes the log was burning so brightly that it scorched our
faces, and the young woman raised her eyes to mine—eyes that had a
strange look to me.
“'It is too hot now,' she said; 'let us go and sit on the sofa over
there.'
“So we went and sat on the sofa, and then she said suddenly, looking me
full in the face:
“'What would you do if a woman were to tell you that she was in love
with you?'
“'Upon my word,' I replied, very much at a loss for an answer, 'I cannot
foresee such a case; but it would depend very much upon the woman.'
“She gave a hard, nervous, vibrating laugh; one of those false laughs
which seem as if they must break thin glass, and then she added: 'Men
are never either venturesome or spiteful.' And, after a moment's
silence, she continued: 'Have you ever been in love, Monsieur Paul?' I
was obliged to acknowledge that I certainly had, and she asked me to
tell her all about it. Whereupon I made up some story or other. She
listened to me attentively, with frequent signs of disapproval and
contempt, and then suddenly she said:
“'No, you understand nothing about the subject. It seems to me that real
love must unsettle the mind, upset the nerves and distract the head;
that it must—how shall I express it?—be dangerous, even terrible, almost
criminal and sacrilegious; that it must be a kind of treason; I mean to
say that it is bound to break laws, fraternal bonds, sacred obligations;
when love is tranquil, easy, lawful and without dangers, is it really
love?'
“I did not know what answer to give her, and I made this philosophical
reflection to myself: 'Oh! female brain, here; indeed, you show
yourself!'
“While speaking, she had assumed a demure saintly air; and, resting on
the cushions, she stretched herself out at full length, with her head on
my shoulder, and her dress pulled up a little so as to show her red
stockings, which the firelight made look still brighter. In a minute or
two she continued:
“'I suppose I have frightened you?' I protested against such a notion,
and she leaned against my breast altogether, and without looking at me,
she said: 'If I were to tell you that I love you, what would you do?'
“And before I could think of an answer, she had thrown her arms around
my neck, had quickly drawn my head down, and put her lips to mine.
“Oh! My dear friend, I can tell you that I did not feel at all happy!
What! deceive Julien? become the lover of this little, silly, wrong-
headed, deceitful woman, who was, no doubt, terribly sensual, and whom
her husband no longer satisfied.
“To betray him continually, to deceive him, to play at being in love
merely because I was attracted by forbidden fruit, by the danger
incurred and the friendship betrayed! No, that did not suit me, but what
was I to do? To imitate Joseph would be acting a very stupid and,
moreover, difficult part, for this woman was enchanting in her perfidy,
inflamed by audacity, palpitating and excited. Let the man who has never
felt on his lips the warm kiss of a woman who is ready to give herself
to him throw the first stone at me.
“Well, a minute more—you understand what I mean? A minute more, and—I
should have been—no, she would have been!—I beg your pardon, he would
have been—when a loud noise made us both jump up. The log had fallen
into the room, knocking over the fire irons and the fender, and on to
the carpet, which it had scorched, and had rolled under an armchair,
which it would certainly set alight.
“I jumped up like a madman, and, as I was replacing on the fire that log
which had saved me, the door opened hastily, and Julien came in.
“'I am free,' he said, with evident pleasure. 'The business was over two
hours sooner than I expected!'
“Yes, my dear friend, without that log, I should have been caught in the
very act, and you know what the consequences would have been!
“You may be sure that I took good care never to be found in a similar
situation again, never, never. Soon afterward I saw that Julien was
giving me the 'cold shoulder,' as they say. His wife was evidently
undermining our friendship. By degrees he got rid of me, and we have
altogether ceased to meet.
“I never married, which ought not to surprise you, I think.”
JULIE ROMAIN
Two years ago this spring I was making a walking tour along the shore of
the Mediterranean. Is there anything more pleasant than to meditate
while walking at a good pace along a highway? One walks in the sunlight,
through the caressing breeze, at the foot of the mountains, along the
coast of the sea. And one dreams! What a flood of illusions, loves,
adventures pass through a pedestrian's mind during a two hours' march!
What a crowd of confused and joyous hopes enter into you with the mild,
light air! You drink them in with the breeze, and they awaken in your
heart a longing for happiness which increases with the hun ger induced
by walking. The fleeting, charming ideas fly and sing like birds.
I was following that long road which goes from Saint Raphael to Italy,
or, rather, that long, splendid panoramic highway which seems made for
the representation of all the love-poems of earth. And I thought that
from Cannes, where one poses, to Monaco, where one gambles, people come
to this spot of the earth for hardly any other purpose than to get
embroiled or to throw away money on chance games, displaying under this
delicious sky and in this garden of roses and oranges all base vanities
and foolish pretensions and vile lusts, showing up the human mind such
as it is, servile, ignorant, arrogant and full of cupidity.
Suddenly I saw some villas in one of those ravishing bays that one meets
at every turn of the mountain; there were only four or five fronting the
sea at the foot of the mountains, and behind them a wild fir wood slopes
into two great valleys, that were untraversed by roads. I stopped short
before one of these chalets, it was so pretty: a small white house with
brown trimmings, overrun with rambler roses up to the top.
The garden was a mass of flowers, of all colors and all kinds, mixed in
a coquettish, well-planned disorder. The lawn was full of them, big pots
flanked each side of every step of the porch, pink or yellow clusters
framed each window, and the terrace with the stone balustrade, which
enclosed this pretty little dwelling, had a garland of enormous red
bells, like drops of blood. Behind the house I saw a long avenue of
orange trees in blossom, which went up to the foot of the mountain.
Over the door appeared the name, “Villa d'Antan,” in small gold letters.
I asked myself what poet or what fairy was living there, what inspired,
solitary being had discovered this spot and created this dream house,
which seemed to nestle in a nosegay.
A workman was breaking stones up the street, and I went to him to ask
the name of the proprietor of this jewel.
“It is Madame Julie Romain,” he replied.
Julie Romain! In my childhood, long ago, I had heard them speak of this
great actress, the rival of Rachel.
No woman ever was more applauded and more loved—especially more loved!
What duets and suicides on her account and what sensational adventures!
How old was this seductive woman now? Sixty, seventy, seventy-five!
Julie Romain here, in this house! The woman who had been adored by the
greatest musician and the most exquisite poet of our land! I still
remember the sensation (I was then twelve years of age) which her flight
to Sicily with the latter, after her rupture with the former, caused
throughout France.
She had left one evening, after a premiere, where the audience had
applauded her for a whole half hour, and had recalled her eleven times
in succession. She had gone away with the poet, in a post-chaise, as was
the fashion then; they had crossed the sea, to love each other in that
antique island, the daughter of Greece, in that immense orange wood
which surrounds Palermo, and which is called the “Shell of Gold.”
People told of their ascension of Mount Etna and how they had leaned
over the immense crater, arm in arm, cheek to cheek, as if to throw
themselves into the very abyss.
Now he was dead, that maker of verses so touching and so profound that
they turned, the heads of a whole generation, so subtle and so
mysterious that they opened a new world to the younger poets.
The other one also was dead—the deserted one, who had attained through
her musical periods that are alive in the memories of all, periods of
triumph and of despair, intoxicating triumph and heartrending despair.
And she was there, in that house veiled by flowers.
I did not hesitate, but rang the bell.
A small servant answered, a boy of eighteen with awkward mien and clumsy
hands. I wrote in pencil on my card a gallant compliment to the actress,
begging her to receive me. Perhaps, if she knew my name, she would open
her door to me.
The little valet took it in, and then came back, asking me to follow
him. He led me to a neat and decorous salon, furnished in the Louis-
Philippe style, with stiff and heavy furniture, from which a little maid
of sixteen, slender but not pretty, took off the covers in my honor.
Then I was left alone.
On the walls hung three portraits, that of the actress in one of her
roles, that of the poet in his close-fitting greatcoat and the ruffled
shirt then in style, and that of the musician seated at a piano.
She, blond, charming, but affected, according to the fashion of her day,
was smiling, with her pretty mouth and blue eyes; the painting was
careful, fine, elegant, but lifeless.
Those faces seemed to be already looking upon posterity.
The whole place had the air of a bygone time, of days that were done and
men who had vanished.
A door opened and a little woman entered, old, very old, very small,
with white hair and white eyebrows, a veritable white mouse, and as
quick and furtive of movement.
She held out her hand to me, saying in a voice still fresh, sonorous and
vibrant:
“Thank you, monsieur. How kind it is of the men of to-day to remember
the women of yesterday! Sit down.”
I told her that her house had attracted me, that I had inquired for the
proprietor's name, and that, on learning it, I could not resist the
desire to ring her bell.
“This gives me all the more pleasure, monsieur,” she replied, “as it is
the first time that such a thing has happened. When I received your
card, with the gracious note, I trembled as if an old friend who had
disappeared for twenty years had been announced to me. I am like a dead
body, whom no one remembers, of whom no one will think until the day
when I shall actually die; then the newspapers will mention Julie Romain
for three days, relating anecdotes and details of my life, reviving
memories, and praising me greatly. Then all will be over with me.”
After a few moments of silence, she continued:
“And this will not be so very long now. In a few months, in a few days,
nothing will remain but a little skeleton of this little woman who is
now alive.”
She raised her eyes toward her portrait, which smiled down upon this
caricature of herself; then she looked at those of the two men, the
disdainful poet and the inspired musician, who seemed to say: “What does
this ruin want of us?”
An indefinable, poignant, irresistible sadness overwhelmed my heart, the
sadness of existences that have had their day, but who are still
debating with their memories, like a person drowning in deep water.
From my seat I could see on the highroad the handsome carriages that
were whirling from Nice to Monaco; inside them I saw young, pretty, rich
and happy women and smiling, satisfied men. Following my eye, she
understood my thought and murmured with a smile of resignation:
“One cannot both be and have been.”
“How beautiful life must have been for you!” I said.
She heaved a great sigh.
“Beautiful and sweet! And for that reason I regret it so much.”
I saw that she was disposed to talk of herself, so I began to question
her, gently and discreetly, as one might touch bruised flesh.
She spoke of her successes, her intoxications and her friends, of her
whole triumphant existence.
“Was it on the stage that you found your most intense joys, your true
happiness?” I asked.
“Oh, no!” she replied quickly.
I smiled; then, raising her eyes to the two portraits, she said, with a
sad glance:
“It was with them.”
“Which one?” I could not help asking.
“Both. I even confuse them up a little now in my old woman's memory, and
then I feel remorse.”
“Then, madame, your acknowledgment is not to them, but to Love itself.
They were merely its interpreters.”
“That is possible. But what interpreters!”
“Are you sure that you have not been, or that you might not have been,
loved as well or better by a simple man, but not a great man, who would
have offered to you his whole life and heart, all his thoughts, all his
days, his whole being, while these gave you two redoubtable rivals,
Music and Poetry?”
“No, monsieur, no!” she exclaimed emphatically, with that still youthful
voice, which caused the soul to vibrate. “Another one might perhaps have
loved me more, but he would not have loved me as these did. Ah! those
two sang to me of the music of love as no one else in the world could
have sung of it. How they intoxicated me! Could any other man express
what they knew so well how to express in tones and in words? Is it
enough merely to love if one cannot put all the poetry and all the music
of heaven and earth into love? And they knew how to make a woman
delirious with songs and with words. Yes, perhaps there was more of
illusion than of reality in our passion; but these illusions lift you
into the clouds, while realities always leave you trailing in the dust.
If others have loved me more, through these two I have understood, felt
and worshipped love.”
Suddenly she began to weep.
She wept silently, shedding tears of despair.
I pretended not to see, looking off into the distance. She resumed,
after a few minutes:
“You see, monsieur, with nearly every one the heart ages with the body.
But this has not happened with me. My body is sixty-nine years old,
while my poor heart is only twenty. And that is the reason why I live
all alone, with my flowers and my dreams.”
There was a long silence between us. She grew calmer and continued,
smiling:
“How you would laugh at me, if you knew, if you knew how I pass my
evenings, when the weather is fine. I am ashamed and I pity myself at
the same time.”
Beg as I might, she would not tell me what she did. Then I rose to
leave.
“Already!” she exclaimed.
And as I said that I wished to dine at Monte Carlo, she asked timidly:
“Will you not dine with me? It would give me a great deal of pleasure.”
I accepted at once. She rang, delighted, and after giving some orders to
the little maid she took me over her house.
A kind of glass-enclosed veranda, filled with shrubs, opened into the
dining-room, revealing at the farther end the long avenue of orange
trees extending to the foot of the mountain. A low seat, hidden by
plants, indicated that the old actress often came there to sit down.
Then we went into the garden, to look at the flowers. Evening fell
softly, one of those calm, moist evenings when the earth breathes forth
all her perfumes. Daylight was almost gone when we sat down at table.
The dinner was good and it lasted a long time, and we became intimate
friends, she and I, when she understood what a profound sympathy she had
aroused in my heart. She had taken two thimblefuls of wine, as the
phrase goes, and had grown more confiding and expansive.
“Come, let us look at the moon,” she said. “I adore the good moon. She
has been the witness of my most intense joys. It seems to me that all my
memories are there, and that I need only look at her to bring them all
back to me. And even—some times—in the evening—I offer to myself a
pretty play—yes, pretty—if you only knew! But no, you would laugh at me.
I cannot—I dare not—no, no—really—no.”
I implored her to tell me what it was.
“Come, now! come, tell me; I promise you that I will not laugh. I swear
it to you—come, now!”
She hesitated. I took her hands—those poor little hands, so thin and so
cold!—and I kissed them one after the other, several times, as her
lovers had once kissed them. She was moved and hesitated.
“You promise me not to laugh?”
“Yes, I swear it to you.”
“Well, then, come.”
She rose, and as the little domestic, awkward in his green livery,
removed the chair behind her, she whispered quickly a few words into his
ear.
“Yes, madame, at once,” he replied.
She took my arm and led me to the veranda.
The avenue of oranges was really splendid to see. The full moon made a
narrow path of silver, a long bright line, which fell on the yellow
sand, between the round, opaque crowns of the dark trees.
As these trees were in bloom, their strong, sweet perfume filled the
night, and swarming among their dark foliage I saw thousands of
fireflies, which looked like seeds fallen from the stars.
“Oh, what a setting for a love scene!” I exclaimed.
She smiled.
“Is it not true? Is it not true? You will see!”
And she made me sit down beside her.
“This is what makes one long for more life. But you hardly think of
these things, you men of to-day. You are speculators, merchants and men
of affairs.
“You no longer even know how to talk to us. When I say 'you,' I mean
young men in general. Love has been turned into a liaison which very
often begins with an unpaid dressmaker's bill. If you think the bill is
dearer than the woman, you disappear; but if you hold the woman more
highly, you pay it. Nice morals—and a nice kind of love!”
She took my hand.
“Look!”
I looked, astonished and delighted. Down there at the end of the avenue,
in the moonlight, were two young people, with their arms around each
other's waist. They were walking along, interlaced, charming, with
short, little steps, crossing the flakes of light; which illuminated
them momentarily, and then sinking back into the shadow. The youth was
dressed in a suit of white satin, such as men wore in the eighteenth
century, and had on a hat with an ostrich plume. The girl was arrayed in
a gown with panniers, and the high, powdered coiffure of the handsome
dames of the time of the Regency.
They stopped a hundred paces from us, and standing in the middle of the
avenue, they kissed each other with graceful gestures.
Suddenly I recognized the two little servants. Then one of those
dreadful fits of laughter that convulse you made me writhe in my chair.
But I did not laugh aloud. I resisted, convulsed and feeling almost ill,
as a man whose leg is cut off resists the impulse to cry out.
As the young pair turned toward the farther end of the avenue they again
became delightful. They went farther and farther away, finally
disappearing as a dream disappears. I no longer saw them. The avenue
seemed a sad place.
I took my leave at once, so as not to see them again, for I guessed that
this little play would last a long time, awakening, as it did, a whole
past of love and of stage scenery; the artificial past, deceitful and
seductive, false but charming, which still stirred the heart of this
amorous old comedienne.
THE RONDOLI SISTERS I
I set out to see Italy thoroughly on two occasions, and each time I was
stopped at the frontier and could not get any further. So I do not know
Italy, said my friend, Charles Jouvent. And yet my two attempts gave me
a charming idea of the manners of that beautiful country. Some time,
however, I must visit its cities, as well as the museums and works of
art with which it abounds. I will make another attempt to penetrate into
the interior, which I have not yet succeeded in doing.
You don't understand me, so I will explain: In the spring of 1874 I was
seized with an irresistible desire to see Venice, Florence, Rome and
Naples. I am, as you know, not a great traveller; it appears to me a
useless and fatiguing business. Nights spent in a train, the disturbed
slumbers of the railway carriage, with the attendant headache, and
stiffness in every limb, the sudden waking in that rolling box, the
unwashed feeling, with your eyes and hair full of dust, the smell of the
coal on which one's lungs feed, those bad dinners in the draughty
refreshment rooms are, according to my ideas, a horrible way of
beginning a pleasure trip.
After this introduction, we have the miseries of the hotel; of some
great hotel full of people, and yet so empty; the strange room and the
doubtful bed!
I am most particular about my bed; it is the sanctuary of life. We
entrust our almost naked and fatigued bodies to it so that they may be
reanimated by reposing between soft sheets and feathers.
There we find the most delightful hours of our existence, the hours of
love and of sleep. The bed is sacred, and should be respected, venerated
and loved by us as the best and most delightful of our earthly
possessions.
I cannot lift up the sheets of a hotel bed without a shudder of disgust.
Who has occupied it the night before? Perhaps dirty, revolting people
have slept in it. I begin, then, to think of all the horrible people
with whom one rubs shoulders every day, people with suspicious-looking
skin which makes one think of the feet and all the rest! I call to mind
those who carry about with them the sickening smell of garlic or of
humanity. I think of those who are deformed and unhealthy, of the
perspiration emanating from the sick, of everything that is ugly and
filthy in man.
And all this, perhaps, in the bed in which I am about to sleep! The mere
idea of it makes me feel ill as I get into it.
And then the hotel dinners—those dreary table d'hote dinners in the
midst of all sorts of extraordinary people, or else those terrible
solitary dinners at a small table in a restaurant, feebly lighted by a
wretched composite candle under a shade.
Again, those terribly dull evenings in some unknown town! Do you know
anything more wretched than the approach of dusk on such an occasion?
One goes about as if almost in a dream, looking at faces that one never
has seen before and never will see again; listening to people talking
about matters which are quite indifferent to you in a language that
perhaps you do not understand. You have a terrible feeling, almost as if
you were lost, and you continue to walk on so as not to be obliged to
return to the hotel, where you would feel more lost still because you
are at home, in a home which belongs to anyone who can pay for it; and
at last you sink into a chair of some well-lighted cafe, whose gilding
and lights oppress you a thousand times more than the shadows in the
streets. Then you feel so abominably lonely sitting in front of the
glass of flat bock beer that a kind of madness seizes you, the longing
to go somewhere or other, no matter where, as long as you need not
remain in front of that marble table amid those dazzling lights.
And then, suddenly, you are aware that you are really alone in the
world, always and everywhere, and that in places which we know, the
familiar jostlings give us the illusion only of human fraternity. At
such moments of self-abandonment and sombre isolation in distant cities
one thinks broadly, clearly and profoundly. Then one suddenly sees the
whole of life outside the vision of eternal hope, apart from the
deceptions of our innate habits, and of our expectations of happiness,
which we indulge in dreams never to be realized.
It is only by going a long distance from home that we can fully
understand how short-lived and empty everything near at hand is; by
searching for the unknown, we perceive how commonplace and evanescent
everything is; only by wandering over the face of the earth can we
understand how small the world is, and how very much alike it is
everywhere.
How well I know, and how I hate and almost fear, those haphazard walks
through unknown streets; and this was the reason why, as nothing would
induce me to undertake a tour in Italy by myself, I made up my mind to
accompany my friend Paul Pavilly.
You know Paul, and how he idealizes women. To him the earth is habitable
only because they are there; the sun gives light and is warm because it
shines upon them; the air is soft and balmy because it blows upon their
skin and ruffles the soft hair on their temples; and the moon is
charming because it makes them dream and imparts a languorous charm to
love. Every act and action of Paul's has woman for its motive; all his
thoughts, all his efforts and hopes are centered in them.
When I mentioned Italy to Paul he at first absolutely refused to leave
Paris. I, however, began to tell him of the adventures I had on my
travels. I assured him that all Italian women are charming, and I made
him hope for the most refined pleasures at Naples, thanks to certain
letters of introduction which I had; and so at last he allowed himself
to be persuaded.
II
We took the express one Thursday evening, Paul and I. Hardly anyone goes
south at that time of the year, so that we had the carriages to
ourselves, and both of us were in a bad temper on leaving Paris, sorry
for having yielded to the temptation of this journey, and regretting
Marly, the Seine, and our lazy boating excursions, and all those
pleasures in and near Paris which are so dear to every true Parisian.
As soon as the train started Paul stuck himself in his corner, and said,
“It is most idiotic to go all that distance,” and as it was too late for
him to change his mind then, I said, “Well, you should not have come.”
He made no answer, and I felt very much inclined to laugh when I saw how
furious he looked. He is certainly always rather like a squirrel, but
then every one of us has retained the type of some animal or other as
the mark of his primitive origin. How many people have jaws like a
bulldog, or heads like goats, rabbits, foxes, horses, or oxen. Paul is a
squirrel turned into a man. He has its bright, quick eyes, its hair, its
pointed nose, its small, fine, supple, active body, and a certain
mysterious resemblance in his general bearing; in fact, a similarity of
movement, of gesture, and of bearing which might almost be taken for a
recollection.
At last we both went to sleep with that uncomfortable slumber of the
railway carriage, which is interrupted by horrible cramps in the arms
and neck, and by the sudden stoppages of the train.
We woke up as we were passing along the Rhone. Soon the continued noise
of crickets came in through the windows, that cry which seems to be the
voice of the warm earth, the song of Provence; and seemed to instill
into our looks, our breasts, and our souls the light and happy feeling
of the south, that odor of the parched earth, of the stony and light
soil of the olive with its gray-green foliage.
When the train stopped again a railway guard ran along the train calling
out “Valence” in a sonorous voice, with an accent that again gave us a
taste of that Provence which the shrill note of the crickets had already
imparted to us.
Nothing fresh happened till we got to Marseilles, where we alighted for
breakfast, but when we returned to our carriage we found a woman
installed there.
Paul, with a delighted glance at me, gave his short mustache a
mechanical twirl, and passed his fingers through his, hair, which had
become slightly out of order with the night's journey. Then he sat down
opposite the newcomer.
Whenever I happen to see a striking new face, either in travelling or in
society, I always have the strongest inclination to find out what
character, mind, and intellectual capacities are hidden beneath those
features.
She was a young and pretty woman, certainly a native of the south of
France, with splendid eyes, beautiful wavy black hair, which was so
thick and long that it seemed almost too heavy for her head. She was
dressed with a certain southern bad taste which made her look a little
vulgar. Her regular features had none of the grace and finish of the
refined races, of that slight delicacy which members of the aristocracy
inherit from their birth, and which is the hereditary mark of thinner
blood.
Her bracelets were too big to be of gold; she wore earrings with large
white stones that were certainly not diamonds, and she belonged
unmistakably to the People. One surmised that she would talk too loud,
and shout on every occasion with exaggerated gestures.
When the train started she remained motionless in her place, in the
attitude of a woman who was indignant, without even looking at us.
Paul began to talk to me, evidently with an eye to effect, trying to
attract her attention, as shopkeepers expose their choice wares to catch
the notice of passersby.
She, however, did not appear to be paying the least attention.
“Toulon! Ten minutes to wait! Refreshment room!” the porters shouted.
Paul motioned to me to get out, and as soon as we had done so, he said:
“I wonder who on earth she can be?”
I began to laugh. “I am sure I don't know, and I don't in the least
care.”
He was quite excited.
“She is an uncommonly fresh and pretty girl. What eyes she has, and how
cross she looks. She must have been dreadfully worried, for she takes no
notice of anything.”
“You will have all your trouble for nothing,” I growled.
He began to lose his temper.
“I am not taking any trouble, my dear fellow. I think her an extremely
pretty woman, that is all. If one could only speak to her! But I don't
know how to begin. Cannot you give me an idea? Can't you guess who she
is?”
“Upon my word, I cannot. However, I should rather think she is some
strolling actress who is going to rejoin her company after a love
adventure.”
He seemed quite upset, as if I had said something insulting.
“What makes you think that? On the contrary, I think she looks most
respectable.”
“Just look at her bracelets,” I said, “her earrings and her whole dress.
I should not be the least surprised if she were a dancer or a circus
rider, but most likely a dancer. Her whole style smacks very much of the
theatre.”
He evidently did not like the idea.
“She is much too young, I am sure; why, she is hardly twenty.”
“Well,” I replied, “there are many things which one can do before one is
twenty; dancing and elocution are among them.”
“Take your seats for Nice, Vintimiglia,” the guards and porters called.
We got in; our fellow passenger was eating an orange, and certainly she
did not do it elegantly. She had spread her pocket-handkerchief on her
knees, and the way in which she tore off the peel and opened her mouth
to put in the pieces, and then spat the pips out of the window, showed
that her training had been decidedly vulgar.
She seemed, also, more put out than ever, and swallowed the fruit with
an exceedingly comic air of rage.
Paul devoured her with his eyes, and tried to attract her attention and
excite her curiosity; but in spite of his talk, and of the manner in
which he brought in well-known names, she did not pay the least
attention to him.
After passing Frejus and St. Raphael, the train passed through a
veritable garden, a paradise of roses, and groves of oranges and lemons
covered with fruits and flowers at the same time. That delightful coast
from Marseilles to Genoa is a kingdom of perfumes in a home of flowers.
June is the time to see it in all its beauty, when in every narrow
valley and on every slope, the most exquisite flowers are growing
luxuriantly. And the roses! fields, hedges, groves of roses. They climb
up the walls, blossom on the roofs, hang from the trees, peep out from
among the bushes; they are white, red, yellow, large and small, single,
with a simple self-colored dress, or full and heavy in brilliant
toilettes.
Their breath makes the air heavy and relaxing, and the still more
penetrating odor of the orange blossoms sweetens the atmosphere till it
might almost be called the refinement of odor.
The shore, with its brown rocks, was bathed by the motionless
Mediterranean. The hot summer sun stretched like a fiery cloth over the
mountains, over the long expanses of sand, and over the motionless,
apparently solid blue sea. The train went on through the tunnels, along
the slopes, above the water, on straight, wall-like viaducts, and a
soft, vague, saltish smell, a smell of drying seaweed, mingled at times
with the strong, heavy perfume of the flowers.
But Paul neither saw, looked at, nor smelled anything, for our fellow
traveller engrossed all his attention.
When we reached Cannes, as he wished to speak to me he signed to me to
get out, and as soon as I did so, he took me by the arm.
“Do you know, she is really charming. Just look at her eyes; and I never
saw anything like her hair.”
“Don't excite yourself,” I replied, “or else address her, if you have
any intentions that way. She does not look unapproachable; I fancy,
although she appear to be a little bit grumpy.”
“Why don't you speak to her?” he said.
“I don't know what to say, for I am always terribly stupid at first; I
can never make advances to a woman in the street. I follow them, go
round and round them, and quite close to them, but never know what to
say at first. I only once tried to enter into conversation with a woman
in that way. As I clearly saw that she was waiting for me to make
overtures, and as I felt bound to say something, I stammered out, 'I
hope you are quite well, madame?' She laughed in my face, and I made my
escape.”
I promised Paul to do all I could to bring about a conversation, and
when we had taken our places again, I politely asked our neighbor:
“Have you any objection to the smell of tobacco, madame?”
She merely replied, “Non capisco.”
So she was an Italian! I felt an absurd inclination to laugh. As Paul
did not understand a word of that language, I was obliged to act as his
interpreter, so I said in Italian:
“I asked you, madame, whether you had any objection to tobacco smoke?”
With an angry look she replied, “Che mi fa!”
She had neither turned her head nor looked at me, and I really did not
know whether to take this “What do I care” for an authorization, a
refusal, a real sign of indifference, or for a mere “Let me alone.”
“Madame,” I replied, “if you mind the smell of tobacco in the least—”
She again said, “Mica,” in a tone which seemed to mean, “I wish to
goodness you would leave me alone!” It was, however, a kind of
permission, so I said to Paul:
“You may smoke.”
He looked at me in that curious sort of way that people have when they
try to understand others who are talking in a strange language before
them, and asked me:
“What did you say to her?”
“I asked whether we might smoke, and she said we might do whatever we
liked.”
Whereupon I lighted my cigar.
“Did she say anything more?”
“If you had counted her words you would have noticed that she used
exactly six, two of which gave me to understand that she knew no French,
so four remained, and much can be said in four words.”
Paul seemed quite unhappy, disappointed, and at sea, so to speak.
But suddenly the Italian asked me, in that tone of discontent which
seemed habitual to her, “Do you know at what time we shall get to
Genoa?”
“At eleven o'clock,” I replied. Then after a moment I went on:
“My friend and I are also going to Genoa, and if we can be of any
service to you, we shall be very happy, as you are quite alone.” But she
interrupted with such a “Mica!” that I did not venture on another word.
“What did she say?” Paul asked.
“She said she thought you were charming.”
But he was in no humor for joking, and begged me dryly not to make fun
of him; so I translated her question and my polite offer, which had been
so rudely rejected.
Then he really became as restless as a caged squirrel.
“If we only knew,” he said, “what hotel she was going to, we would go to
the same. Try to find out so as to have another opportunity to make her
talk.”
It was not particularly easy, and I did not know what pretext to invent,
desirous as I was to make the acquaintance of this unapproachable
person.
We passed Nice, Monaco, Mentone, and the train stopped at the frontier
for the examination of luggage.
Although I hate those ill-bred people who breakfast and dine in railway-
carriages, I went and bought a quantity of good things to make one last
attack on her by their means. I felt sure that this girl must,
ordinarily, be by no means inaccessible. Something had put her out and
made her irritable, but very little would suffice, a mere word or some
agreeable offer, to decide her and vanquish her.
We started again, and we three were still alone. I spread my eatables on
the seat. I cut up the fowl, put the slices of ham neatly on a piece of
paper, and then carefully laid out our dessert, strawberries, plums,
cherries and cakes, close to the girl.
When she saw that we were about to eat she took a piece of chocolate and
two little crisp cakes out of her pocket and began to munch them.
“Ask her to have some of ours,” Paul said in a whisper.
“That is exactly what I wish to do, but it is rather a difficult
matter.”
As she, however, glanced from time to time at our provisions, I felt
sure that she would still be hungry when she had finished what she had
with her; so, as soon as her frugal meal was over, I said to her:
“It would be very kind of you if you would take some of this fruit.”
Again she said “Mica!” but less crossly than before.
“Well, then,” I said, “may I offer you a little wine? I see you have not
drunk anything. It is Italian wine, and as we are now in your own
country, we should be very pleased to see such a pretty Italian mouth
accept the offer of its French neighbors.”
She shook her head slightly, evidently wishing to refuse, but very
desirous of accepting, and her mica this time was almost polite. I took
the flask, which was covered with straw in the Italian fashion, and
filling the glass, I offered it to her.
“Please drink it,” I said, “to bid us welcome to your country.”
She took the glass with her usual look, and emptied it at a draught,
like a woman consumed with thirst, and then gave it back to me without
even saying “Thank you.”
I then offered her the cherries. “Please take some,” I said; “we shall
be so glad if you will.”
Out of her corner she looked at all the fruit spread out beside her, and
said so rapidly that I could scarcely follow her: “A me non piacciono ne
le ciriegie ne le susine; amo soltano le fragole.”
“What does she say?” Paul asked.
“That she does riot care for cherries or plums, but only for
strawberries.”
I put a newspaper full of wild strawberries on her lap, and she ate them
quickly, tossing them into her mouth from some distance in a coquettish
and charming manner.
When she had finished the little red heap, which soon disappeared under
the rapid action of her hands, I asked her:
“What may I offer you now?”
“I will take a little chicken,” she replied.
She certainly devoured half of it, tearing it to pieces with the rapid
movements of her jaws like some carnivorous animal. Then she made up her
mind to have some cherries, which she “did not like,” and then some
plums, then some little cakes. Then she said, “I have had enough,” and
sat back in her corner.
I was much amused, and tried to make her eat more, insisting, in fact,
till she suddenly flew into a rage, and flung such a furious mica at me,
that I would no longer run the risk of spoiling her digestion.
I turned to my friend. “My poor Paul,” I said, “I am afraid we have had
our trouble for nothing.”
The night came on, one of those hot summer nights which extend their
warm shade over the burning and exhausted earth. Here and there, in the
distance, by the sea, on capes and promontories, bright stars, which I
was, at times, almost inclined to confound with lighthouses, began to
shine on the dark horizon:
The scent of the orange trees became more penetrating, and we breathed
with delight, distending our lungs to inhale it more deeply. The balmy
air was soft, delicious, almost divine.
Suddenly I noticed something like a shower of stars under the dense
shade of the trees along the line, where it was quite dark. It might
have been taken for drops of light, leaping, flying, playing and running
among the leaves, or for small stars fallen from the skies in order to
have an excursion on the earth; but they were only fireflies dancing a
strange fiery ballet in the perfumed air.
One of them happened to come into our carriage, and shed its
intermittent light, which seemed to be extinguished one moment and to be
burning the next. I covered the carriage-lamp with its blue shade and
watched the strange fly careering about in its fiery flight. Suddenly it
settled on the dark hair of our neighbor, who was half dozing after
dinner. Paul seemed delighted, with his eyes fixed on the bright,
sparkling spot, which looked like a living jewel on the forehead of the
sleeping woman.
The Italian woke up about eleven o'clock, with the bright insect still
in her hair. When I saw her move, I said: “We are just getting to Genoa,
madame,” and she murmured, without answering me, as if possessed by some
obstinate and embarrassing thought:
“What am I going to do, I wonder?”
And then she suddenly asked:
“Would you like me to come with you?”
I was so taken aback that I really did not understand her.
“With us? How do you mean?”
She repeated, looking more and more furious:
“Would you like me to be your guide now, as soon as we get out of the
train?”
“I am quite willing; but where do you want to go.”
She shrugged her shoulders with an air of supreme indifference.
“Wherever you like; what does it matter to me?” She repeated her “Che mi
fa” twice.
“But we are going to the hotel.”
“Very well, let us all go to the hotel,” she said, in a contemptuous
voice.
I turned to Paul, and said:
“She wishes to know whether we should like her to come with us.”
My friend's utter surprise restored my self-possession. He stammered:
“With us? Where to? What for? How?”
“I don't know, but she made this strange proposal to me in a most
irritated voice. I told her that we were going to the hotel, and she
said: 'Very well, let us all go there!' I suppose she is without a
penny. She certainly has a very strange way of making acquaintances.”
Paul, who 'was very much excited, exclaimed:
“I am quite agreeable. Tell her that we will go wherever she likes.”
Then, after a moment's hesitation, he said uneasily:
“We must know, however, with whom she wishes to go—with you or with me?”
I turned to the Italian, who did not even seem to be listening to us,
and said:
“We shall be very happy to have you with us, but my friend wishes to
know whether you will take my arm or his?”
She opened her black eyes wide with vague surprise, and said, “Che ni
fa?”
I was obliged to explain myself. “In Italy, I believe, when a man looks
after a woman, fulfils all her wishes, and satisfies all her caprices,
he is called a patito. Which of us two will you take for your patito?”
Without the slightest hesitation she replied:
“You!”
I turned to Paul. “You see, my friend, she chooses me; you have no
chance.”
“All the better for you,” he replied in a rage. Then, after thinking for
a few moments, he went on:
“Do you really care about taking this creature with you? She will spoil
our journey. What are we to do with this woman, who looks like I don't
know what? They will not take us in at any decent hotel.”
I, however, just began to find the Italian much nicer than I had thought
her at first, and I was now very desirous to take her with us. The idea
delighted me.
I replied, “My dear fellow, we have accepted, and it is too late to
recede. You were the first to advise me to say 'Yes.'”
“It is very stupid,” he growled, “but do as you please.”
The train whistled, slackened speed, and we ran into the station.
I got out of the carriage, and offered my new companion my hand. She
jumped out lightly, and I gave her my arm, which she took with an air of
seeming repugnance. As soon as we had claimed our luggage we set off
into the town, Paul walking in utter silence.
“To what hotel shall we go?” I asked him. “It may be difficult to get
into the City of Paris with a woman, especially with this Italian.”
Paul interrupted me. “Yes, with an Italian who looks more like a dancer
than a duchess. However, that is no business of mine. Do just as you
please.”
I was in a state of perplexity. I had written to the City of Paris to
retain our rooms, and now I did not know what to do.
Two commissionaires followed us with our luggage. I continued: “You
might as well go on first, and say that we are coming; and give the
landlord to understand that I have a—a friend with me and that we should
like rooms quite by themselves for us three, so as not to be brought in
contact with other travellers. He will understand, and we will decide
according to his answer.”
But Paul growled, “Thank you, such commissions and such parts do not
suit me, by any means. I did not come here to select your apartments or
to minister to your pleasures.”
But I was urgent: “Look here, don't be angry. It is surely far better to
go to a good hotel than to a bad one, and it is not difficult to ask the
landlord for three separate bedrooms and a dining-room.”
I put a stress on three, and that decided him.
He went on first, and I saw him go into a large hotel while I remained
on the other side of the street, with my fair Italian, who did not say a
word, and followed the porters with the luggage.
Paul came back at last, looking as dissatisfied as my companion.
“That is settled,” he said, “and they will take us in; but here are only
two bedrooms. You must settle it as you can.”
I followed him, rather ashamed of going in with such a strange
companion.
There were two bedrooms separated by a small sitting-room. I ordered a
cold supper, and then I turned to the Italian with a perplexed look.
“We have only been able to get two rooms, so you must choose which you
like.”
She replied with her eternal “Che mi fa!” I thereupon took up her little
black wooden trunk, such as servants use, and took it into the room on
the right, which I had chosen for her. A bit of paper was fastened to
the box, on which was written, Mademoiselle Francesca Rondoli, Genoa.
“Your name is Francesca?” I asked, and she nodded her head, without
replying.
“We shall have supper directly,” I continued. “Meanwhile, I dare say you
would like to arrange your toilette a little?”
She answered with a 'mica', a word which she employed just as frequently
as 'Che me fa', but I went on: “It is always pleasant after a journey.”
Then I suddenly remembered that she had not, perhaps, the necessary
requisites, for she appeared to me in a very singular position, as if
she had just escaped from some disagreeable adventure, and I brought her
my dressing-case.
I put out all the little instruments for cleanliness and comfort which
it contained: a nail-brush, a new toothbrush—I always carry a selection
of them about with me—my nail-scissors, a nail-file, and sponges. I
uncorked a bottle of eau de cologne, one of lavender-water, and a little
bottle of new-mown hay, so that she might have a choice. Then I opened
my powder-box, and put out the powder-puff, placed my fine towels over
the water-jug, and a piece of new soap near the basin.
She watched my movements with a look of annoyance in her wide-open eyes,
without appearing either astonished or pleased at my forethought.
“Here is all that you require,” I then said; “I will tell you when
supper is ready.”
When I returned to the sitting-room I found that Paul had shut himself
in the other room, so I sat down to wait.
A waiter went to and fro, bringing plates and glasses. He laid the table
slowly, then put a cold chicken on it, and told me that all was ready.
I knocked gently at Mademoiselle Rondoli's door. “Come in,” she said,
and when I did so I was struck by a strong, heavy smell of perfumes, as
if I were in a hairdresser's shop.
The Italian was sitting on her trunk in an attitude either of thoughtful
discontent or absent-mindedness. The towel was still folded over the
waterjug that was full of water, and the soap, untouched and dry, was
lying beside the empty basin; but one would have thought that the young
woman had used half the contents of the bottles of perfume. The eau de
cologne, however, had been spared, as only about a third of it had gone;
but to make up for that she had used a surprising amount of lavender-
water and new-mown hay. A cloud of violet powder, a vague white mist,
seemed still to be floating in the air, from the effects of her over-
powdering her face and neck. It seemed to cover her eyelashes, eyebrows,
and the hair on her temples like snow, while her cheeks were plastered
with it, and layers of it covered her nostrils, the corners of her eyes,
and her chin.
When she got up she exhaled such a strong odor of perfume that it almost
made me feel faint.
When we sat down to supper, I found that Paul was in a most execrable
temper, and I could get nothing out of him but blame, irritable words,
and disagreeable remarks.
Mademoiselle Francesca ate like an ogre, and as soon as she had finished
her meal she threw herself upon the sofa in the sitting-room. Sitting
down beside her, I said gallantly, kissing her hand:
“Shall I have the bed prepared, or will you sleep on the couch?”
“It is all the same to me. 'Che mi fa'!”
Her indifference vexed me.
“Should you like to retire at once?”
“Yes; I am very sleepy.”
She got up, yawned, gave her hand to Paul, who took it with a furious
look, and I lighted her into the bedroom. A disquieting feeling haunted
me. “Here is all you want,” I said again.
The next morning she got up early, like a woman who is accustomed to
work. She woke me by doing so, and I watched her through my half-closed
eyelids.
She came and went without hurrying herself, as if she were astonished at
having nothing to do. At length she went to the dressing-table, and in a
moment emptied all my bottles of perfume. She certainly also used some
water, but very little.
When she was quite dressed, she sat down on her trunk again, and
clasping one knee between her hands, she seemed to be thinking.
At that moment I pretended to first notice her, and said:
“Good-morning, Francesca.”
Without seeming in at all a better temper than the previous night, she
murmured, “Good-morning!”
When I asked her whether she had slept well, she nodded her head, and
jumping out of bed, I went and kissed her.
She turned her face toward me like a child who is being kissed against
its will; but I took her tenderly in my arms, and gently pressed my lips
on her eyelids, which she closed with evident distaste under my kisses
on her fresh cheek and full lips, which she turned away.
“You don't seem to like being kissed,” I said to her.
“Mica!” was her only answer.
I sat down on the trunk by her side, and passing my arm through hers, I
said: “Mica! mica! mica! in reply to everything. I shall call you
Mademoiselle Mica, I think.”
For the first time I fancied that I saw the shadow of a smile on her
lips, but it passed by so quickly that I may have been mistaken.
“But if you never say anything but Mica, I shall not know what to do to
please you. Let me see; what shall we do to-day?”
She hesitated a moment, as if some fancy had flitted through her head,
and then she said carelessly: “It is all the same to me; whatever you
like.”
“Very well, Mademoiselle Mica, we will have a carriage and go for a
drive.”
“As you please,” she said.
Paul was waiting for us in the dining-room, looking as bored as third
parties usually do in love affairs. I assumed a delighted air, and shook
hands with him with triumphant energy.
“What are you thinking of doing?” he asked.
“First of all, we will go and see a little of the town, and then we
might get a carriage and take a drive in the neighborhood.”
We breakfasted almost in silence, and then set out. I dragged Francesca
from palace to palace, and she either looked at nothing or merely
glanced carelessly at the various masterpieces. Paul followed us,
growling all sorts of disagreeable things. Then we all three took a
drive in silence into the country and returned to dinner.
The next day it was the same thing and the next day again; and on the
third Paul said to me: “Look here, I am going to leave you; I am not
going to stop here for three weeks watching you make love to this
creature.”
I was perplexed and annoyed, for to my great surprise I had become
singularly attached to Francesca. A man is but weak and foolish, carried
away by the merest trifle, and a coward every time that his senses are
excited or mastered. I clung to this unknown girl, silent and
dissatisfied as she always was. I liked her somewhat ill-tempered face,
the dissatisfied droop of her mouth, the weariness of her look; I liked
her fatigued movements, the contemptuous way in which she let me kiss
her, the very indifference of her caresses. A secret bond, that
mysterious bond of physical love, which does not satisfy, bound me to
her. I told Paul so, quite frankly. He treated me as if I were a fool,
and then said:
“Very well, take her with you.”
But she obstinately refused to leave Genoa, without giving any reason. I
besought, I reasoned, I promised, but all was of no avail, and so I
stayed on.
Paul declared that he would go by himself, and went so far as to pack up
his portmanteau; but he remained all the same.
Thus a fortnight passed. Francesca was always silent and irritable,
lived beside me rather than with me, responded to all my requirements
and all my propositions with her perpetual Che mi fa, or with her no
less perpetual Mica.
My friend became more and more furious, but my only answer was, “You can
go if you are tired of staying. I am not detaining you.”
Then he called me names, overwhelmed me with reproaches, and exclaimed:
“Where do you think I can go now? We had three weeks at our disposal,
and here is a fortnight gone! I cannot continue my journey now; and, in
any case, I am not going to Venice, Florence and Rome all by myself. But
you will pay for it, and more dearly than you think, most likely. You
are not going to bring a man all the way from Paris in order to shut him
up at a hotel in Genoa with an Italian adventuress.”
When I told him, very calmly, to return to Paris, he exclaimed that he
intended to do so the very next day; but the next day he was still
there, still in a rage and swearing.
By this time we began to be known in the streets through which we
wandered from morning till night. Sometimes French people would turn
round astonished at meeting their fellow-countrymen in the company of
this girl with her striking costume, who looked singularly out of place,
not to say compromising, beside us.
She used to walk along, leaning on my arm, without looking at anything.
Why did she remain with me, with us, who seemed to do so little to amuse
her? Who was she? Where did she come from? What was she doing? Had she
any plan or idea? Where did she live? As an adventuress, or by chance
meetings? I tried in vain to find out and to explain it. The better I
knew her the more enigmatical she became. She seemed to be a girl of
poor family who had been taken away, and then cast aside and lost. What
did she think would become of her, or whom was she waiting for? She
certainly did not appear to be trying to make a conquest of me, or to
make any real profit out of me.
I tried to question her, to speak to her of her childhood and family;
but she never gave me an answer. I stayed with her, my heart unfettered
and my senses enchained, never wearied of holding her in my arms, that
proud and quarrelsome woman, captivated by my senses, or rather carried
away, overcome by a youthful, healthy, powerful charm, which emanated
from her fragrant person and from the well-molded lines of her body.
Another week passed, and the term of my journey was drawing on, for I
had to be back in Paris by the eleventh of July. By this time Paul had
come to take his part in the adventure, though still grumbling at me,
while I invented pleasures, distractions and excursions to amuse
Francesca and my friend; and in order to do this I gave myself a great
amount of trouble.
One day I proposed an excursion to Sta Margarita, that charming little
town in the midst of gardens, hidden at the foot of a slope which
stretches far into the sea up to the village of Portofino. We three
walked along the excellent road which goes along the foot of the
mountain. Suddenly Francesca said to me: “I shall not be able to go with
you to-morrow; I must go and see some of my relatives.”
That was all; I did not ask her any questions, as I was quite sure she
would not answer me.
The next morning she got up very early. When she spoke to me it was in a
constrained and hesitating voice:
“If I do not come back again, shall you come and fetch me?”
“Most certainly I shall,” was my reply. “Where shall I go to find you?”
Then she explained: “You must go into the Street Victor-Emmanuel, down
the Falcone road and the side street San-Rafael and into the furniture
shop in the building at the right at the end of a court, and there you
must ask for Madame Rondoli. That is the place.”
And so she went away, leaving me rather astonished.
When Paul saw that I was alone, he stammered out: “Where; is Francesca?”
And when I told him what had happened, he exclaimed:
“My dear fellow, let us make use of our opportunity, and bolt; as it is,
our time is up. Two days, more or less, make no difference. Let us go at
once; go and pack up your things. Off we go!”
But I refused. I could not, as I told him, leave the girl in that manner
after such companionship for nearly three weeks. At any rate, I ought to
say good-by to her, and make her accept a present; I certainly had no
intention of behaving badly to her.
But he would not listen; he pressed and worried me, but I would not give
way.
I remained indoors for several hours, expecting Francesca's return, but
she did not come, and at last, at dinner, Paul said with a triumphant
air:
“She has flown, my dear fellow; it is certainly very strange.”
I must acknowledge that I was surprised and rather vexed. He laughed in
my face, and made fun of me.
“It is not exactly a bad way of getting rid of you, though rather
primitive. 'Just wait for me, I shall be back in a moment,' they often
say. How long are you going to wait? I should not wonder if you were
foolish enough to go and look for her at the address she gave you. 'Does
Madame Rondoli live here, please?' 'No, monsieur.' I'll bet that you are
longing to go there.”
“Not in the least,” I protested, “and I assure you that if she does not
come back to-morrow morning I shall leave by the express at eight
o'clock. I shall have waited twenty-four hours, and that is enough; my
conscience will be quite clear.”
I spent an uneasy and unpleasant evening, for I really had at heart a
very tender feeling for her. I went to bed at twelve o'clock, and hardly
slept at all. I got up at six, called Paul, packed up my things, and two
hours later we set out for France together.
III
The next year, at just about the same period, I was seized as one is
with a periodical fever, with a new desire to go to Italy, and I
immediately made up my mind to carry it into effect. There is no doubt
that every really well-educated man ought to see Florence, Venice and
Rome. This travel has, also, the additional advantage of providing many
subjects of conversation in society, and of giving one an opportunity
for bringing forward artistic generalities which appear profound.
This time I went alone, and I arrived at Genoa at the same time as the
year before, but without any adventure on the road. I went to the same
hotel, and actually happened to have the same room.
I was hardly in bed when the recollection of Francesca which, since the
evening before, had been floating vaguely through my mind, haunted me
with strange persistency. I thought of her nearly the whole night, and
by degrees the wish to see her again seized me, a confused desire at
first, which gradually grew stronger and more intense. At last I made up
my mind to spend the next day in Genoa to try to find her, and if I
should not succeed, to take the evening train.
Early in the morning I set out on my search. I remembered the directions
she had given me when she left me, perfectly—Victor-Emmanuel Street,
house of the furniture-dealer, at the bottom of the yard on the right.
I found it without the least difficulty, and I knocked at the door of a
somewhat dilapidated-looking dwelling. It was opened by a stout woman,
who must have been very handsome, but who actually was only very dirty.
Although she had too much embonpoint, she still bore the lines of
majestic beauty; her untidy hair fell over her forehead and shoulders,
and one fancied one could see her floating about in an enormous
dressing-gown covered with spots of dirt and grease. Round her neck she
wore a great gilt necklace, and on her wrists were splendid bracelets of
Genoa filigree work.
In rather a hostile manner she asked me what I wanted, and I replied by
requesting her to tell me whether Francesca Rondoli lived there.
“What do you want with her?” she asked.
“I had the pleasure of meeting her last year, and I should like to see
her again.”
The old woman looked at me suspiciously.
“Where did you meet her?” she asked.
“Why, here in Genoa itself.”
“What is your name?”
I hesitated a moment, and then I told her. I had hardly done so when the
Italian put out her arms as if to embrace me. “Oh! you are the Frenchman
how glad I am to see you! But what grief you caused the poor child! She
waited for you a month; yes, a whole month. At first she thought you
would come to fetch her. She wanted to see whether you loved her. If you
only knew how she cried when she saw that you were not coming! She cried
till she seemed to have no tears left. Then she went to the hotel, but
you had gone. She thought that most likely you were travelling in Italy,
and that you would return by Genoa to fetch her, as she would not go
with you. And she waited more than a month, monsieur; and she was so
unhappy; so unhappy. I am her mother.”
I really felt a little disconcerted, but I regained my self-possession,
and asked:
“Where is she now?”
“She has gone to Paris with a painter, a delightful man, who loves her
very much, and who gives her everything that she wants. Just look at
what she sent me; they are very pretty, are they not?”
And she showed me, with quite southern animation, her heavy bracelets
and necklace. “I have also,” she continued, “earrings with stones in
them, a silk dress, and some rings; but I only wear them on grand
occasions. Oh! she is very happy, monsieur, very happy. She will be so
pleased when I tell her you have been here. But pray come in and sit
down. You will take something or other, surely?”
But I refused, as I now wished to get away by the first train; but she
took me by the arm and pulled me in, saying:
“Please, come in; I must tell her that you have been in here.”
I found myself in a small, rather dark room, furnished with only a table
and a few chairs.
She continued: “Oh, she is very happy now, very happy. When you met her
in the train she was very miserable; she had had an unfortunate love
affair in Marseilles, and she was coming home, poor child. But she liked
you at once, though she was still rather sad, you understand. Now she
has all she wants, and she writes and tells me everything that she does.
His name is Bellemin, and they say he is a great painter in your
country. He fell in love with her at first sight. But you will take a
glass of sirup?-it is very good. Are you quite alone, this year?”
“Yes,” I said, “quite alone.”
I felt an increasing inclination to laugh, as my first disappointment
was dispelled by what Mother Rondoli said. I was obliged; however, to
drink a glass of her sirup.
“So you are quite alone?” she continued. “How sorry I am that Francesca
is not here now; she would have been company for you all the time you
stayed. It is not very amusing to go about all by oneself, and she will
be very sorry also.”
Then, as I was getting up to go, she exclaimed:
“But would you not like Carlotta to go with you? She knows all the walks
very well. She is my second daughter, monsieur.”
No doubt she took my look of surprise for consent, for she opened the
inner door and called out up the dark stairs which I could not see:
“Carlotta! Carlotta! make haste down, my dear child.”
I tried to protest, but she would not listen.
“No; she will be very glad to go with you; she is very nice, and much
more cheerful than her sister, and she is a good girl, a very good girl,
whom I love very much.”
In a few moments a tall, slender, dark girl appeared, her hair hanging
down, and her youthful figure showing unmistakably beneath an old dress
of her mother's.
The latter at once told her how matters stood.
“This is Francesca's Frenchman, you know, the one whom she knew last
year. He is quite alone, and has come to look for her, poor fellow; so I
told him that you would go with him to keep him company.”
The girl looked at me with her handsome dark eyes, and said, smiling:
“I have no objection, if he wishes it”
I could not possibly refuse, and merely said:
“Of course, I shall be very glad of your company.”
Her mother pushed her out. “Go and get dressed directly; put on your
blue dress and your hat with the flowers, and make haste.”
As soon as she had left the room the old woman explained herself: “I
have two others, but they are much younger. It costs a lot of money to
bring up four children. Luckily the eldest is off my hands at present.”
Then she told all about herself, about her husband, who had been an
employee on the railway, but who was dead, and she expatiated on the
good qualities of Carlotta, her second girl, who soon returned, dressed,
as her sister had been, in a striking, peculiar manner.
Her mother examined her from head to foot, and, after finding everything
right, she said:
“Now, my children, you can go.” Then turning to the girl, she said: “Be
sure you are back by ten o'clock to-night; you know the door is locked
then.” The answer was:
“All right, mamma; don't alarm yourself.”
She took my arm and we went wandering about the streets, just as I had
wandered the previous year with her sister.
We returned to the hotel for lunch, and then I took my new friend to
Santa Margarita, just as I had taken her sister the year previously.
During the whole fortnight which I had at my disposal, I took Carlotta
to all the places of interest in and about Genoa. She gave me no cause
to regret her sister.
She cried when I left her, and the morning of my departure I gave her
four bracelets for her mother, besides a substantial token of my
affection for herself.
One of these days I intend to return to Italy, and I cannot help
remembering with a certain amount of uneasiness, mingled with hope, that
Madame Rondoli has two more daughters.
ORIGINAL SHORT STORIES, Vol. 7.
GUY DE MAUPASSANT ORIGINAL SHORT STORIES Translated by ALBERT M. C.
McMASTER, B.A. A. E. HENDERSON, B.A. MME. QUESADA and Others
VOLUME VII.
THE FALSE GEMS
Monsieur Lantin had met the young girl at a reception at the house of
the second head of his department, and had fallen head over heels in
love with her.
She was the daughter of a provincial tax collector, who had been dead
several years. She and her mother came to live in Paris, where the
latter, who made the acquaintance of some of the families in her
neighborhood, hoped to find a husband for her daughter.
They had very moderate means, and were honorable, gentle, and quiet.
The young girl was a perfect type of the virtuous woman in whose hands
every sensible young man dreams of one day intrusting his happiness. Her
simple beauty had the charm of angelic modesty, and the imperceptible
smile which constantly hovered about the lips seemed to be the
reflection of a pure and lovely soul. Her praises resounded on every
side. People never tired of repeating: “Happy the man who wins her love!
He could not find a better wife.”
Monsieur Lantin, then chief clerk in the Department of the Interior,
enjoyed a snug little salary of three thousand five hundred francs, and
he proposed to this model young girl, and was accepted.
He was unspeakably happy with her. She governed his household with such
clever economy that they seemed to live in luxury. She lavished the most
delicate attentions on her husband, coaxed and fondled him; and so great
was her charm that six years after their marriage, Monsieur Lantin
discovered that he loved his wife even more than during the first days
of their honeymoon.
He found fault with only two of her tastes: Her love for the theatre,
and her taste for imitation jewelry. Her friends (the wives of some
petty officials) frequently procured for her a box at the theatre, often
for the first representations of the new plays; and her husband was
obliged to accompany her, whether he wished it or not, to these
entertainments which bored him excessively after his day's work at the
office.
After a time, Monsieur Lantin begged his wife to request some lady of
her acquaintance to accompany her, and to bring her home after the
theatre. She opposed this arrangement, at first; but, after much
persuasion, finally consented, to the infinite delight of her husband.
Now, with her love for the theatre, came also the desire for ornaments.
Her costumes remained as before, simple, in good taste, and always
modest; but she soon began to adorn her ears with huge rhinestones,
which glittered and sparkled like real diamonds. Around her neck she
wore strings of false pearls, on her arms bracelets of imitation gold,
and combs set with glass jewels.
Her husband frequently remonstrated with her, saying:
“My dear, as you cannot afford to buy real jewelry, you ought to appear
adorned with your beauty and modesty alone, which are the rarest
ornaments of your sex.”
But she would smile sweetly, and say:
“What can I do? I am so fond of jewelry. It is my only weakness. We
cannot change our nature.”
Then she would wind the pearl necklace round her fingers, make the
facets of the crystal gems sparkle, and say:
“Look! are they not lovely? One would swear they were real.”
Monsieur Lantin would then answer, smilingly:
“You have bohemian tastes, my dear.”
Sometimes, of an evening, when they were enjoying a tete-a-tete by the
fireside, she would place on the tea table the morocco leather box
containing the “trash,” as Monsieur Lantin called it. She would examine
the false gems with a passionate attention, as though they imparted some
deep and secret joy; and she often persisted in passing a necklace
around her husband's neck, and, laughing heartily, would exclaim: “How
droll you look!” Then she would throw herself into his arms, and kiss
him affectionately.
One evening, in winter, she had been to the opera, and returned home
chilled through and through. The next morning she coughed, and eight
days later she died of inflammation of the lungs.
Monsieur Lantin's despair was so great that his hair became white in one
month. He wept unceasingly; his heart was broken as he remembered her
smile, her voice, every charm of his dead wife.
Time did not assuage his grief. Often, during office hours, while his
colleagues were discussing the topics of the day, his eyes would
suddenly fill with tears, and he would give vent to his grief in
heartrending sobs. Everything in his wife's room remained as it was
during her lifetime; all her furniture, even her clothing, being left as
it was on the day of her death. Here he was wont to seclude himself
daily and think of her who had been his treasure-the joy of his
existence.
But life soon became a struggle. His income, which, in the hands of his
wife, covered all household expenses, was now no longer sufficient for
his own immediate wants; and he wondered how she could have managed to
buy such excellent wine and the rare delicacies which he could no longer
procure with his modest resources.
He incurred some debts, and was soon reduced to absolute poverty. One
morning, finding himself without a cent in his pocket, he resolved to
sell something, and immediately the thought occurred to him of disposing
of his wife's paste jewels, for he cherished in his heart a sort of
rancor against these “deceptions,” which had always irritated him in the
past. The very sight of them spoiled, somewhat, the memory of his lost
darling.
To the last days of her life she had continued to make purchases,
bringing home new gems almost every evening, and he turned them over
some time before finally deciding to sell the heavy necklace, which she
seemed to prefer, and which, he thought, ought to be worth about six or
seven francs; for it was of very fine workmanship, though only
imitation.
He put it in his pocket, and started out in search of what seemed a
reliable jeweler's shop. At length he found one, and went in, feeling a
little ashamed to expose his misery, and also to offer such a worthless
article for sale.
“Sir,” said he to the merchant, “I would like to know what this is
worth.”
The man took the necklace, examined it, called his clerk, and made some
remarks in an undertone; he then put the ornament back on the counter,
and looked at it from a distance to judge of the effect.
Monsieur Lantin, annoyed at all these ceremonies, was on the point of
saying: “Oh! I know well enough it is not worth anything,” when the
jeweler said: “Sir, that necklace is worth from twelve to fifteen
thousand francs; but I could not buy it, unless you can tell me exactly
where it came from.”
The widower opened his eyes wide and remained gaping, not comprehending
the merchant's meaning. Finally he stammered: “You say—are you sure?”
The other replied, drily: “You can try elsewhere and see if any one will
offer you more. I consider it worth fifteen thousand at the most. Come
back; here, if you cannot do better.”
Monsieur Lantin, beside himself with astonishment, took up the necklace
and left the store. He wished time for reflection.
Once outside, he felt inclined to laugh, and said to himself: “The fool!
Oh, the fool! Had I only taken him at his word! That jeweler cannot
distinguish real diamonds from the imitation article.”
A few minutes after, he entered another store, in the Rue de la Paix. As
soon as the proprietor glanced at the necklace, he cried out:
“Ah, parbleu! I know it well; it was bought here.”
Monsieur Lantin, greatly disturbed, asked:
“How much is it worth?”
“Well, I sold it for twenty thousand francs. I am willing to take it
back for eighteen thousand, when you inform me, according to our legal
formality, how it came to be in your possession.”
This time, Monsieur Lantin was dumfounded. He replied:
“But—but—examine it well. Until this moment I was under the impression
that it was imitation.”
The jeweler asked:
“What is your name, sir?”
“Lantin—I am in the employ of the Minister of the Interior. I live at
number sixteen Rue des Martyrs.”
The merchant looked through his books, found the entry, and said: “That
necklace was sent to Madame Lantin's address, sixteen Rue des Martyrs,
July 20, 1876.”
The two men looked into each other's eyes—the widower speechless with
astonishment; the jeweler scenting a thief. The latter broke the
silence.
“Will you leave this necklace here for twenty-four hours?” said he; “I
will give you a receipt.”
Monsieur Lantin answered hastily: “Yes, certainly.” Then, putting the
ticket in his pocket, he left the store.
He wandered aimlessly through the streets, his mind in a state of
dreadful confusion. He tried to reason, to understand. His wife could
not afford to purchase such a costly ornament. Certainly not.
But, then, it must have been a present!—a present!—a present, from whom?
Why was it given her?
He stopped, and remained standing in the middle of the street. A
horrible doubt entered his mind—She? Then, all the other jewels must
have been presents, too! The earth seemed to tremble beneath him—the
tree before him to be falling; he threw up his arms, and fell to the
ground, unconscious. He recovered his senses in a pharmacy, into which
the passers-by had borne him. He asked to be taken home, and, when he
reached the house, he shut himself up in his room, and wept until
nightfall. Finally, overcome with fatigue, he went to bed and fell into
a heavy sleep.
The sun awoke him next morning, and he began to dress slowly to go to
the office. It was hard to work after such shocks. He sent a letter to
his employer, requesting to be excused. Then he remembered that he had
to return to the jeweler's. He did not like the idea; but he could not
leave the necklace with that man. He dressed and went out.
It was a lovely day; a clear, blue sky smiled on the busy city below.
Men of leisure were strolling about with their hands in their pockets.
Monsieur Lantin, observing them, said to himself: “The rich, indeed, are
happy. With money it is possible to forget even the deepest sorrow. One
can go where one pleases, and in travel find that distraction which is
the surest cure for grief. Oh if I were only rich!”
He perceived that he was hungry, but his pocket was empty. He again
remembered the necklace. Eighteen thousand francs! Eighteen thousand
francs! What a sum!
He soon arrived in the Rue de la Paix, opposite the jeweler's. Eighteen
thousand francs! Twenty times he resolved to go in, but shame kept him
back. He was hungry, however—very hungry—and not a cent in his pocket.
He decided quickly, ran across the street, in order not to have time for
reflection, and rushed into the store.
The proprietor immediately came forward, and politely offered him a
chair; the clerks glanced at him knowingly.
“I have made inquiries, Monsieur Lantin,” said the jeweler, “and if you
are still resolved to dispose of the gems, I am ready to pay you the
price I offered.”
“Certainly, sir,” stammered Monsieur Lantin.
Whereupon the proprietor took from a drawer eighteen large bills,
counted, and handed them to Monsieur Lantin, who signed a receipt; and,
with trembling hand, put the money into his pocket.
As he was about to leave the store, he turned toward the merchant, who
still wore the same knowing smile, and lowering his eyes, said:
“I have—I have other gems, which came from the same source. Will you buy
them, also?”
The merchant bowed: “Certainly, sir.”
Monsieur Lantin said gravely: “I will bring them to you.” An hour later,
he returned with the gems.
The large diamond earrings were worth twenty thousand francs; the
bracelets, thirty-five thousand; the rings, sixteen thousand; a set of
emeralds and sapphires, fourteen thousand; a gold chain with solitaire
pendant, forty thousand—making the sum of one hundred and forty-three
thousand francs.
The jeweler remarked, jokingly:
“There was a person who invested all her savings in precious stones.”
Monsieur Lantin replied, seriously:
“It is only another way of investing one's money.”
That day he lunched at Voisin's, and drank wine worth twenty francs a
bottle. Then he hired a carriage and made a tour of the Bois. He gazed
at the various turnouts with a kind of disdain, and could hardly refrain
from crying out to the occupants:
“I, too, am rich!—I am worth two hundred thousand francs.”
Suddenly he thought of his employer. He drove up to the bureau, and
entered gaily, saying:
“Sir, I have come to resign my position. I have just inherited three
hundred thousand francs.”
He shook hands with his former colleagues, and confided to them some of
his projects for the future; he then went off to dine at the Cafe
Anglais.
He seated himself beside a gentleman of aristocratic bearing; and,
during the meal, informed the latter confidentially that he had just
inherited a fortune of four hundred thousand francs.
For the first time in his life, he was not bored at the theatre, and
spent the remainder of the night in a gay frolic.
Six months afterward, he married again. His second wife was a very
virtuous woman; but had a violent temper. She caused him much sorrow.
FASCINATION
I can tell you neither the name of the country, nor the name of the man.
It was a long, long way from here on a fertile and burning shore. We had
been walking since the morning along the coast, with the blue sea bathed
in sunlight on one side of us, and the shore covered with crops on the
other. Flowers were growing quite close to the waves, those light,
gentle, lulling waves. It was very warm, a soft warmth permeated with
the odor of the rich, damp, fertile soil. One fancied one was inhaling
germs.
I had been told, that evening, that I should meet with hospitality at
the house of a Frenchman who lived in an orange grove at the end of a
promontory. Who was he? I did not know. He had come there one morning
ten years before, and had bought land which he planted with vines and
sowed with grain. He had worked, this man, with passionate energy, with
fury. Then as he went on from month to month, year to year, enlarging
his boundaries, cultivating incessantly the strong virgin soil, he
accumulated a fortune by his indefatigable labor.
But he kept on working, they said. Rising at daybreak, he would remain
in the fields till evening, superintending everything without ceasing,
tormented by one fixed idea, the insatiable desire for money, which
nothing can quiet, nothing satisfy. He now appeared to be very rich. The
sun was setting as I reached his house. It was situated as described, at
the end of a promontory in the midst of a grove of orange trees. It was
a large square house, quite plain, and overlooked the sea. As I
approached, a man wearing a long beard appeared in the doorway. Having
greeted him, I asked if he would give me shelter for the night. He held
out his hand and said, smiling:
“Come in, monsieur, consider yourself at home.”
He led me into a room, and put a man servant at my disposal with the
perfect ease and familiar graciousness of a man-of-the-world. Then he
left me saying:
“We will dine as soon as you are ready to come downstairs.”
We took dinner, sitting opposite each other, on a terrace facing the
sea. I began to talk about this rich, distant, unknown land. He smiled,
as he replied carelessly:
“Yes, this country is beautiful. But no country satisfies one when they
are far from the one they love.”
“You regret France?”
“I regret Paris.”
“Why do you not go back?”
“Oh, I will return there.”
And gradually we began to talk of French society, of the boulevards, and
things Parisian. He asked me questions that showed he knew all about
these things, mentioned names, all the familiar names in vaudeville
known on the sidewalks.
“Whom does one see at Tortoni's now?
“Always the same crowd, except those who died.” I looked at him
attentively, haunted by a vague recollection. I certainly had seen that
head somewhere. But where? And when? He seemed tired, although he was
vigorous; and sad, although he was determined. His long, fair beard fell
on his chest. He was somewhat bald and had heavy eyebrows and a thick
mustache.
The sun was sinking into the sea, turning the vapor from the earth into
a fiery mist. The orange blossoms exhaled their powerful, delicious
fragrance. He seemed to see nothing besides me, and gazing steadfastly
he appeared to discover in the depths of my mind the far-away, beloved
and well-known image of the wide, shady pavement leading from the
Madeleine to the Rue Drouot.
“Do you know Boutrelle?”
“Yes, indeed.”
“Has he changed much?”
“Yes, his hair is quite white.”
“And La Ridamie?”
“The same as ever.”
“And the women? Tell me about the women. Let's see. Do you know Suzanne
Verner?”
“Yes, very much. But that is over.”
“Ah! And Sophie Astier?”
“Dead.”
“Poor girl. Did you—did you know—”
But he ceased abruptly: And then, in a changed voice, his face suddenly
turning pale, he continued:
“No, it is best that I should not speak of that any more, it breaks my
heart.”
Then, as if to change the current of his thoughts he rose.
“Would you like to go in?” he said.
“Yes, I think so.”
And he preceded me into the house. The downstairs rooms were enormous,
bare and mournful, and had a deserted look. Plates and glasses were
scattered on the tables, left there by the dark-skinned servants who
wandered incessantly about this spacious dwelling.
Two rifles were banging from two nails, on the wall; and in the corners
of the rooms were spades, fishing poles, dried palm leaves, every
imaginable thing set down at random when people came home in the evening
and ready to hand when they went out at any time, or went to work.
My host smiled as he said:
“This is the dwelling, or rather the kennel, of an exile, but my own
room is cleaner. Let us go there.”
As I entered I thought I was in a second-hand store, it was so full of
things of all descriptions, strange things of various kinds that one
felt must be souvenirs. On the walls were two pretty paintings by well-
known artists, draperies, weapons, swords and pistols, and exactly in
the middle, on the principal panel, a square of white satin in a gold
frame.
Somewhat surprised, I approached to look at it, and perceived a hairpin
fastened in the centre of the glossy satin. My host placed his hand on
my shoulder.
“That,” said he, “is the only thing that I look at here, and the only
thing that I have seen for ten years. M. Prudhomme said: 'This sword is
the most memorable day of my life.' I can say: 'This hairpin is all my
life.'”
I sought for some commonplace remark, and ended by saying:
“You have suffered on account of some woman?”
He replied abruptly:
“Say, rather, that I am suffering like a wretch.”
“But come out on my balcony. A name rose to my lips just now which I
dared not utter; for if you had said 'Dead' as you did of Sophie Astier,
I should have fired a bullet into my brain, this very day.”
We had gone out on the wide balcony from whence we could see two gulfs,
one to the right and the other to the left, enclosed by high gray
mountains. It was just twilight and the reflection of the sunset still
lingered in the sky.
He continued:
“Is Jeanne de Limours still alive?”
His eyes were fastened on mine and were full of a trembling anxiety. I
smiled.
“Parbleu—she is prettier than ever.”
“Do you know her?”
“Yes.”
He hesitated and then said:
“Very well?”
“No.”
He took my hand.
“Tell me about her,” he said.
“Why, I have nothing to tell. She is one of the most charming women, or,
rather, girls, and the most admired in Paris. She leads a delightful
existence and lives like a princess, that is all.”
“I love her,” he murmured in a tone in which he might have said “I am
going to die.” Then suddenly he continued:
“Ah! For three years we lived in a state of terror and delight. I almost
killed her five or six times. She tried to pierce my eyes with that
hairpin that you saw just now. Look, do you see that little white spot
beneath my left eye? We loved each other. How can I explain that
infatuation? You would not understand it.”
“There must be a simple form of love, the result of the mutual impulse
of two hearts and two souls. But there is also assuredly an atrocious
form, that tortures one cruelly, the result of the occult blending of
two unlike personalities who detest each other at the same time that
they adore one another.”
“In three years this woman had ruined me. I had four million francs
which she squandered in her calm manner, quietly, eat them up with a
gentle smile that seemed to fall from her eyes on to her lips.”
“You know her? There is something irresistible about her. What is it? I
do not know. Is it those gray eyes whose glance penetrates you like a
gimlet and remains there like the point of an arrow? It is more likely
the gentle, indifferent and fascinating smile that she wears like a
mask. Her slow grace pervades you little by little; exhales from her
like a perfume, from her slim figure that scarcely sways as she passes
you, for she seems to glide rather than walk; from her pretty voice with
its slight drawl that would seem to be the music of her smile; from her
gestures, also, which are never exaggerated, but always appropriate, and
intoxicate your vision with their harmony. For three years she was the
only being that existed for me on the earth! How I suffered; for she
deceived me as she deceived everyone! Why? For no reason; just for the
pleasure of deceiving. And when I found it out, when I treated her as a
common girl and a beggar, she said quietly: 'Are we married?'
“Since I have been here I have thought so much about her that at last I
understand her. She is Manon Lescaut come back to life. It is Marion,
who could not love without deceiving; Marion for whom love, amusement,
money, are all one.”
He was silent. After a few minutes he resumed:
“When I had spent my last sou on her she said simply:
“'You understand, my dear boy, that I cannot live on air and weather. I
love you very much, better than anyone, but I must live. Poverty and I
could not keep house together.”
“And if I should tell you what a horrible life I led with her! When I
looked at her I would just as soon have killed her as kissed her. When I
looked at her . . . I felt a furious desire to open my arms to embrace
and strangle her. She had, back of her eyes, something false and
intangible that made me execrate her; and that was, perhaps, the reason
I loved her so well. The eternal feminine, the odious and seductive
feminine, was stronger in her than in any other woman. She was full of
it, overcharged, as with a venomous and intoxicating fluid. She was a
woman to a greater extent than any one has ever been.”
“And when I went out with her she would look at all men in such a manner
that she seemed to offer herself to each in a single glance. This
exasperated me, and still it attached me to her all the more. This
creature in just walking along the street belonged to everyone, in spite
of me, in spite of herself, by the very fact of her nature, although she
had a modest, gentle carriage. Do you understand?
“And what torture! At the theatre, at the restaurant she seemed to
belong to others under my very eyes. And as soon as I left her she did
belong to others.
“It is now ten years since I saw her and I love her better than ever.”
Night spread over the earth. A strong perfume of orange blossoms
pervaded the air. I said:
“Will you see her again?”
“Parbleu! I now have here, in land and money, seven to eight thousand
francs. When I reach a million I shall sell out and go away. I shall
have enough to live on with her for a year—one whole year. And then,
good-bye, my life will be finished.”
“But after that?” I asked.
“After that, I do not know. That will be all, I may possibly ask her to
take me as a valet de chambre.”
YVETTE SAMORIS “The Comtesse Samoris.”
“That lady in black over there?”
“The very one. She's wearing mourning for her daughter, whom she
killed.”
“You don't mean that seriously? How did she die?”
“Oh! it is a very simple story, without any crime in it, any violence.”
“Then what really happened?”
“Almost nothing. Many courtesans are born to be virtuous women, they
say; and many women called virtuous are born to be courtesans—is that
not so? Now, Madame Samoris, who was born a courtesan, had a daughter
born a virtuous woman, that's all.”
“I don't quite understand you.”
“I'll—explain what I mean. The comtesse is nothing but a common,
ordinary parvenue originating no one knows where. A Hungarian or
Wallachian countess or I know not what. She appeared one winter in
apartments she had taken in the Champs Elysees, that quarter for
adventurers and adventuresses, and opened her drawing-room to the first
comer or to any one that turned up.
“I went there. Why? you will say. I really can't tell you. I went there,
as every one goes to such places because the women are facile and the
men are dishonest. You know that set composed of filibusters with varied
decorations, all noble, all titled, all unknown at the embassies, with
the exception of those who are spies. All talk of their honor without
the slightest occasion for doing so, boast of their ancestors, tell you
about their lives, braggarts, liars, sharpers, as dangerous as the false
cards they have up their sleeves, as delusive as their names—in short,
the aristocracy of the bagnio.
“I adore these people. They are interesting to study, interesting to
know, amusing to understand, often clever, never commonplace like public
functionaries. Their wives are always pretty, with a slight flavor of
foreign roguery, with the mystery of their existence, half of it perhaps
spent in a house of correction. They have, as a rule, magnificent eyes
and incredible hair. I adore them also.
“Madame Samoris is the type of these adventuresses, elegant, mature and
still beautiful. Charming feline creatures, you feel that they are
vicious to the marrow of their bones. You find them very amusing when
you visit them; they give card parties; they have dances and suppers; in
short, they offer you all the pleasures of social life.
“And she had a daughter—a tall, fine-looking girl, always ready for
amusement, always full of laughter and reckless gaiety—a true
adventuress' daughter—but, at the same time, an innocent,
unsophisticated, artless girl, who saw nothing, knew nothing, understood
nothing of all the things that happened in her father's house.
“The girl was simply a puzzle to me. She was a mystery. She lived amid
those infamous surroundings with a quiet, tranquil ease that was either
terribly criminal or else the result of innocence. She sprang from the
filth of that class like a beautiful flower fed on corruption.”
“How do you know about them?”
“How do I know? That's the funniest part of the business! One morning
there was a ring at my door, and my valet came up to tell me that M.
Joseph Bonenthal wanted to speak to me. I said directly:
“'And who is this gentleman?' My valet replied: 'I don't know, monsieur;
perhaps 'tis some one that wants employment.' And so it was. The man
wanted me to take him as a servant. I asked him where he had been last.
He answered: 'With the Comtesse Samoris.' 'Ah!' said I, 'but my house is
not a bit like hers.' 'I know that well, monsieur,' he said, 'and that's
the very reason I want to take service with monsieur. I've had enough of
these people: a man may stay a little while with them, but he won't
remain long with them.' I required an additional man servant at the time
and so I took him.
“A month later Mademoiselle Yvette Samoris died mysteriously, and here
are all the details of her death I could gather from Joseph, who got
them from his sweetheart, the comtesse's chambermaid.
“It was a ball night, and two newly arrived guests were chatting behind
a door. Mademoiselle Yvette, who had just been dancing, leaned against
this door to get a little air.
“They did not see her approaching, but she heard what they were saying.
And this was what they said:
“'But who is the father of the girl?'
“'A Russian, it appears; Count Rouvaloff. He never comes near the mother
now.'
“'And who is the reigning prince to-day?'
“'That English prince standing near the window; Madame Samoris adores
him. But her adoration of any one never lasts longer than a month or six
weeks. Nevertheless, as you see, she has a large circle of admirers. All
are called—and nearly all are chosen. That kind of thing costs a good
deal, but—hang it, what can you expect?'
“'And where did she get this name of Samoris?'
“'From the only man perhaps that she ever loved—a Jewish banker from
Berlin who goes by the name of Samuel Morris.'
“'Good. Thanks. Now that I know what kind of woman she is and have seen
her, I'm off!'
“What a shock this was to the mind of a young girl endowed with all the
instincts of a virtuous woman! What despair overwhelmed that simple
soul! What mental tortures quenched her unbounded gaiety, her delightful
laughter, her exultant satisfaction with life! What a conflict took
place in that youthful heart up to the moment when the last guest had
left! Those were things that Joseph could not tell me. But, the same
night, Yvette abruptly entered her mother's room just as the comtesse
was getting into bed, sent out the lady's maid, who was close to the
door, and, standing erect and pale and with great staring eyes, she
said:
“'Mamma, listen to what I heard a little while ago during the ball.'
“And she repeated word for word the conversation just as I told it to
you.
“The comtesse was so stunned that she did not know what to say in reply
at first. When she recovered her self-possession she denied everything
and called God to witness that there was no truth in the story.
“The young girl went away, distracted but not convinced. And she began
to watch her mother.
“I remember distinctly the strange alteration that then took place in
her. She became grave and melancholy. She would fix on us her great
earnest eyes as if she wanted to read what was at the bottom of our
hearts. We did not know what to think of her and used to imagine that
she was looking out for a husband.
“One evening she overheard her mother talking to her admirer and later
saw them together, and her doubts were confirmed. She was heartbroken,
and after telling her mother what she had seen, she said coldly, like a
man of business laying down the terms of an agreement:
“'Here is what I have determined to do, mamma: We will both go away to
some little town, or rather into the country. We will live there quietly
as well as we can. Your jewelry alone may be called a fortune. If you
wish to marry some honest man, so much the better; still better will it
be if I can find one. If you don't consent to do this, I will kill
myself.'
“This time the comtesse ordered her daughter to go to bed and never to
speak again in this manner, so unbecoming in the mouth of a child toward
her mother.
“Yvette's answer to this was: 'I give you a month to reflect. If, at the
end of that month, we have not changed our way of living, I will kill
myself, since there is no other honorable issue left to my life.'
“And she left the room.
“At the end of a month the Comtesse Samoris had resumed her usual
entertainments, as though nothing had occurred. One day, under the
pretext that she had a bad toothache, Yvette purchased a few drops of
chloroform from a neighboring chemist. The next day she purchased more,
and every time she went out she managed to procure small doses of the
narcotic. She filled a bottle with it.
“One morning she was found in bed, lifeless and already quite cold, with
a cotton mask soaked in chloroform over her face.
“Her coffin was covered with flowers, the church was hung in white.
There was a large crowd at the funeral ceremony.
“Ah! well, if I had known—but you never can know—I would have married
that girl, for she was infernally pretty.”
“And what became of the mother?”
“Oh! she shed a lot of tears over it. She has only begun to receive
visits again for the past week.”
“And what explanation is given of the girl's death?”
“Oh! they pretended that it was an accident caused by a new stove, the
mechanism of which got out of order. As a good many such accidents have
occurred, the thing seemed probable enough.”
A VENDETTA
The widow of Paolo Saverini lived alone with her son in a poor little
house on the outskirts of Bonifacio. The town, built on an outjutting
part of the mountain, in places even overhanging the sea, looks across
the straits, full of sandbanks, towards the southernmost coast of
Sardinia. Beneath it, on the other side and almost surrounding it, is a
cleft in the cliff like an immense corridor which serves as a harbor,
and along it the little Italian and Sardinian fishing boats come by a
circuitous route between precipitous cliffs as far as the first houses,
and every two weeks the old, wheezy steamer which makes the trip to
Ajaccio.
On the white mountain the houses, massed together, makes an even whiter
spot. They look like the nests of wild birds, clinging to this peak,
overlooking this terrible passage, where vessels rarely venture. The
wind, which blows uninterruptedly, has swept bare the forbidding coast;
it drives through the narrow straits and lays waste both sides. The pale
streaks of foam, clinging to the black rocks, whose countless peaks rise
up out of the water, look like bits of rag floating and drifting on the
surface of the sea.
The house of widow Saverini, clinging to the very edge of the precipice,
looks out, through its three windows, over this wild and desolate
picture.
She lived there alone, with her son Antonia and their dog “Semillante,”
a big, thin beast, with a long rough coat, of the sheep-dog breed. The
young man took her with him when out hunting.
One night, after some kind of a quarrel, Antoine Saverini was
treacherously stabbed by Nicolas Ravolati, who escaped the same evening
to Sardinia.
When the old mother received the body of her child, which the neighbors
had brought back to her, she did not cry, but she stayed there for a
long time motionless, watching him. Then, stretching her wrinkled hand
over the body, she promised him a vendetta. She did not wish anybody
near her, and she shut herself up beside the body with the dog, which
howled continuously, standing at the foot of the bed, her head stretched
towards her master and her tail between her legs. She did not move any
more than did the mother, who, now leaning over the body with a blank
stare, was weeping silently and watching it.
The young man, lying on his back, dressed in his jacket of coarse cloth,
torn at the chest, seemed to be asleep. But he had blood all over him;
on his shirt, which had been torn off in order to administer the first
aid; on his vest, on his trousers, on his face, on his hands. Clots of
blood had hardened in his beard and in his hair.
His old mother began to talk to him. At the sound of this voice the dog
quieted down.
“Never fear, my boy, my little baby, you shall be avenged. Sleep, sleep;
you shall be avenged. Do you hear? It's your mother's promise! And she
always keeps her word, your mother does, you know she does.”
Slowly she leaned over him, pressing her cold lips to his dead ones.
Then Semillante began to howl again with a long, monotonous,
penetrating, horrible howl.
The two of them, the woman and the dog, remained there until morning.
Antoine Saverini was buried the next day and soon his name ceased to be
mentioned in Bonifacio.
He had neither brothers nor cousins. No man was there to carry on the
vendetta. His mother, the old woman, alone pondered over it.
On the other side of the straits she saw, from morning until night, a
little white speck on the coast. It was the little Sardinian village
Longosardo, where Corsican criminals take refuge when they are too
closely pursued. They compose almost the entire population of this
hamlet, opposite their native island, awaiting the time to return, to go
back to the “maquis.” She knew that Nicolas Ravolati had sought refuge
in this village.
All alone, all day long, seated at her window, she was looking over
there and thinking of revenge. How could she do anything without
help—she, an invalid and so near death? But she had promised, she had
sworn on the body. She could not forget, she could not wait. What could
she do? She no longer slept at night; she had neither rest nor peace of
mind; she thought persistently. The dog, dozing at her feet, would
sometimes lift her head and howl. Since her master's death she often
howled thus, as though she were calling him, as though her beast's soul,
inconsolable too, had also retained a recollection that nothing could
wipe out.
One night, as Semillante began to howl, the mother suddenly got hold of
an idea, a savage, vindictive, fierce idea. She thought it over until
morning. Then, having arisen at daybreak she went to church. She prayed,
prostrate on the floor, begging the Lord to help her, to support her, to
give to her poor, broken-down body the strength which she needed in
order to avenge her son.
She returned home. In her yard she had an old barrel, which acted as a
cistern. She turned it over, emptied it, made it fast to the ground with
sticks and stones. Then she chained Semillante to this improvised kennel
and went into the house.
She walked ceaselessly now, her eyes always fixed on the distant coast
of Sardinia. He was over there, the murderer.
All day and all night the dog howled. In the morning the old woman
brought her some water in a bowl, but nothing more; no soup, no bread.
Another day went by. Semillante, exhausted, was sleeping. The following
day her eyes were shining, her hair on end and she was pulling wildly at
her chain.
All this day the old woman gave her nothing to eat. The beast, furious,
was barking hoarsely. Another night went by.
Then, at daybreak, Mother Saverini asked a neighbor for some straw. She
took the old rags which had formerly been worn by her husband and
stuffed them so as to make them look like a human body.
Having planted a stick in the ground, in front of Semillante's kennel,
she tied to it this dummy, which seemed to be standing up. Then she made
a head out of some old rags.
The dog, surprised, was watching this straw man, and was quiet, although
famished. Then the old woman went to the store and bought a piece of
black sausage. When she got home she started a fire in the yard, near
the kennel, and cooked the sausage. Semillante, frantic, was jumping
about, frothing at the mouth, her eyes fixed on the food, the odor of
which went right to her stomach.
Then the mother made of the smoking sausage a necktie for the dummy. She
tied it very tight around the neck with string, and when she had
finished she untied the dog.
With one leap the beast jumped at the dummy's throat, and with her paws
on its shoulders she began to tear at it. She would fall back with a
piece of food in her mouth, then would jump again, sinking her fangs
into the string, and snatching few pieces of meat she would fall back
again and once more spring forward. She was tearing up the face with her
teeth and the whole neck was in tatters.
The old woman, motionless and silent, was watching eagerly. Then she
chained the beast up again, made her fast for two more days and began
this strange performance again.
For three months she accustomed her to this battle, to this meal
conquered by a fight. She no longer chained her up, but just pointed to
the dummy.
She had taught her to tear him up and to devour him without even leaving
any traces in her throat.
Then, as a reward, she would give her a piece of sausage.
As soon as she saw the man, Semillante would begin to tremble. Then she
would look up to her mistress, who, lifting her finger, would cry, “Go!”
in a shrill tone.
When she thought that the proper time had come, the widow went to
confession and, one Sunday morning she partook of communion with an
ecstatic fervor. Then, putting on men's clothes and looking like an old
tramp, she struck a bargain with a Sardinian fisherman who carried her
and her dog to the other side of the straits.
In a bag she had a large piece of sausage. Semillante had had nothing to
eat for two days. The old woman kept letting her smell the food and
whetting her appetite.
They got to Longosardo. The Corsican woman walked with a limp. She went
to a baker's shop and asked for Nicolas Ravolati. He had taken up his
old trade, that of carpenter. He was working alone at the back of his
store.
The old woman opened the door and called:
“Hallo, Nicolas!”
He turned around. Then releasing her dog, she cried:
“Go, go! Eat him up! eat him up!”
The maddened animal sprang for his throat. The man stretched out his
arms, clasped the dog and rolled to the ground. For a few seconds he
squirmed, beating the ground with his feet. Then he stopped moving,
while Semillante dug her fangs into his throat and tore it to ribbons.
Two neighbors, seated before their door, remembered perfectly having
seen an old beggar come out with a thin, black dog which was eating
something that its master was giving him.
At nightfall the old woman was at home again. She slept well that night.
MY TWENTY-FIVE DAYS
I had just taken possession of my room in the hotel, a narrow den
between two papered partitions, through which I could hear every sound
made by my neighbors; and I was beginning to arrange my clothes and
linen in the wardrobe with a long mirror, when I opened the drawer which
is in this piece of furniture. I immediately noticed a roll of paper.
Having opened it, I spread it out before me, and read this title:
My Twenty-five Days.
It was the diary of a guest at the watering place, of the last occupant
of my room, and had been forgotten at the moment of departure.
These notes may be of some interest to sensible and healthy persons who
never leave their own homes. It is for their benefit that I transcribe
them without altering a letter.
“CHATEL-GUYON, July 15th.
“At the first glance it is not lively, this country. However, I am going
to spend twenty-five days here, to have my liver and stomach treated,
and to get thin. The twenty-five days of any one taking the baths are
very like the twenty-eight days of the reserves; they are all devoted to
fatigue duty, severe fatigue duty. To-day I have done nothing as yet; I
have been getting settled. I have made the acquaintance of the locality
and of the doctor. Chatel-Guyon consists of a stream in which flows
yellow water, in the midst of several hillocks on which are a casino,
some houses, and some stone crosses. On the bank of the stream, at the
end of the valley, may be seen a square building surrounded by a little
garden; this is the bathing establishment. Sad people wander around this
building—the invalids. A great silence reigns in the walks shaded by
trees, for this is not a pleasure resort, but a true health resort; one
takes care of one's health as a business, and one gets well, so it
seems.
“Those who know affirm, even, that the mineral springs perform true
miracles here. However, no votive offering is hung around the cashier's
office.
“From time to time a gentleman or a lady comes over to a kiosk with a
slate roof, which shelters a woman of smiling and gentle aspect, and a
spring boiling in a basin of cement: Not a word is exchanged between the
invalid and the female custodian of the healing water. She hands the
newcomer a little glass in which air bubbles sparkle in the transparent
liquid. The guest drinks and goes off with a grave step to resume his
interrupted walk beneath the trees.
“No noise in the little park, no breath of air in the leaves; no voice
passes through this silence. One ought to write at the entrance to this
district: 'No one laughs here; they take care of their health.'
“The people who chat resemble mutes who merely open their mouths to
simulate sounds, so afraid are they that their voices might escape.
“In the hotel, the same silence. It is a big hotel, where you dine
solemnly with people of good position, who have nothing to say to each
other. Their manners bespeak good breeding, and their faces reflect the
conviction of a superiority of which it might be difficult for some to
give actual proofs.
“At two o'clock I made my way up to the Casino, a little wooden hut
perched on a hillock, which one reaches by a goat path. But the view
from that height is admirable. Chatel-Guyon is situated in a very narrow
valley, exactly between the plain and the mountain. I perceive, at the
left, the first great billows of the mountains of Auvergne, covered with
woods, and here and there big gray patches, hard masses of lava, for we
are at the foot of the extinct volcanoes. At the right, through the
narrow cut of the valley, I discover a plain, infinite as the sea,
steeped in a bluish fog which lets one only dimly discern the villages,
the towns, the yellow fields of ripe grain, and the green squares of
meadowland shaded with apple trees. It is the Limagne, an immense level,
always enveloped in a light veil of vapor.
“The night has come. And now, after having dined alone, I write these
lines beside my open window. I hear, over there, in front of me, the
little orchestra of the Casino, which plays airs just as a foolish bird
might sing all alone in the desert.
“A dog barks at intervals. This great calm does one good. Goodnight.
“July 16th.—Nothing new. I have taken a bath and then a shower bath. I
have swallowed three glasses of water, and I have walked along the paths
in the park, a quarter of an hour between each glass, then half an hour
after the last. I have begun my twenty-five days.
“July 17th.—Remarked two mysterious, pretty women who are taking their
baths and their meals after every one else has finished.
“July 18th.—Nothing new.
“July 19th.—Saw the two pretty women again. They have style and a little
indescribable air which I like very much.
“July 20th.—Long walk in a charming wooded valley, as far as the
Hermitage of Sans-Souci. This country is delightful, although sad; but
so calm; so sweet, so green. One meets along the mountain roads long
wagons loaded with hay, drawn by two cows at a slow pace or held back by
them in going down the slopes with a great effort of their heads, which
are yoked together. A man with a big black hat on his head is driving
them with a slender stick, tipping them on the side or on the forehead;
and often with a simple gesture, an energetic and serious gesture, he
suddenly halts them when the excessive load precipitates their journey
down the too rugged descents.
“The air is good to inhale in these valleys. And, if it is very warm,
the dust bears with it a light odor of vanilla and of the stable, for so
many cows pass over these routes that they leave reminders everywhere.
And this odor is a perfume, when it would be a stench if it came from
other animals.
“July 21st.—Excursion to the valley of the Enval. It is a narrow gorge
inclosed by superb rocks at the very foot of the mountain. A stream
flows amid the heaped-up boulders.
“As I reached the bottom of this ravine I heard women's voices, and I
soon perceived the two mysterious ladies of my hotel, who were chatting,
seated on a stone.
“The occasion appeared to me a good one, and I introduced myself without
hesitation. My overtures were received without embarrassment. We walked
back together to the hotel. And we talked about Paris. They knew, it
seemed, many people whom I knew, too. Who can they be?
“I shall see them to-morrow. There is nothing more amusing than such
meetings as this.
“July 22d.—Day passed almost entirely with the two unknown ladies. They
are very pretty, by Jove!—one a brunette and the other a blonde. They
say they are widows. H'm?
“I offered to accompany them to Royat tomorrow, and they accepted my
offer.
“Chatel-Guyon is less sad than I thought on my arrival.
“July 23d.—Day spent at Royat. Royat is a little patch of hotels at the
bottom of a valley, at the gate of Clermont-Ferrand. A great many people
there. A large park full of life. Superb view of the Puyde-Dome, seen at
the end of a perspective of valleys.
“My fair companions are very popular, which is flattering to me. The man
who escorts a pretty woman always believes himself crowned with an
aureole; with much more reason, the man who is accompanied by one on
each side of him. Nothing is so pleasant as to dine in a fashionable
restaurant with a female companion at whom everybody stares, and there
is nothing better calculated to exalt a man in the estimation of his
neighbors.
“To go to the Bois, in a trap drawn by a sorry nag, or to go out into
the boulevard escorted by a plain woman, are the two most humiliating
things that could happen to a sensitive heart that values the opinion of
others. Of all luxuries, woman is the rarest and the most distinguished;
she is the one that costs most and which we desire most; she is,
therefore the one that we should seek by preference to exhibit to the
jealous eyes of the world.
“To exhibit to the world a pretty woman leaning on your arm is to
excite, all at once, every kind of jealousy. It is as much as to say:
'Look here! I am rich, since I possess this rare and costly object; I
have taste, since I have known how to discover this pearl; perhaps,
even, I am loved by her, unless I am deceived by her, which would still
prove that others also consider her charming.
“But, what a disgrace it is to walk about town with an ugly woman!
“And how many humiliating things this gives people to understand!
“In the first place, they assume she must be your wife, for how could it
be supposed that you would have an unattractive sweetheart? A true woman
may be ungraceful; but then, her ugliness implies a thousand
disagreeable things for you. One supposes you must be a notary or a
magistrate, as these two professions have a monopoly of grotesque and
well-dowered spouses. Now, is this not distressing to a man? And then,
it seems to proclaim to the public that you have the odious courage, and
are even under a legal obligation, to caress that ridiculous face and
that ill-shaped body, and that you will, without doubt, be shameless
enough to make a mother of this by no means desirable being—which is the
very height of the ridiculous.
“July 24th.—I never leave the side of the two unknown widows, whom I am
beginning to know quite well. This country is delightful and our hotel
is excellent. Good season. The treatment is doing me an immense amount
of good.
“July 25th.—Drive in a landau to the lake of Tazenat. An exquisite and
unexpected jaunt decided on at luncheon. We started immediately on
rising from table. After a long journey through the mountains we
suddenly perceived an admirable little lake, quite round, very blue,
clear as glass, and situated at the bottom of an extinct crater. One
side of this immense basin is barren, the other is wooded. In the midst
of the trees is a small house where sleeps a good-natured, intellectual
man, a sage who passes his days in this Virgilian region. He opens his
dwelling for us. An idea comes into my head. I exclaim:
“'Supposing we bathe?'
“'Yes,' they said, 'but costumes.'
“'Bah! we are in the wilderness.'
“And we did bathe!
“If I were a poet, how I would describe this unforgettable vision of
those lissome young forms in the transparency of the water! The high,
sloping sides shut in the lake, motionless, gleaming and round, as a
silver coin; the sun pours into it a flood of warm light; and along the
rocks the fair forms move in the almost invisible water in which the
swimmers seemed suspended. On the sand at the bottom of the lake one
could see their shadows as they moved along.
“July 26th.—Some persons seem to look with shocked and disapproving eyes
at my rapid intimacy with the two fair widows. There are some people,
then, who imagine that life consists in being bored. Everything that
appears to be amusing becomes immediately a breach of good breeding or
morality. For them duty has inflexible and mortally tedious rules.
“I would draw their attention, with all respect, to the fact that duty
is not the same for Mormons, Arabs Zulus, Turks, Englishmen, and
Frenchmen, and that there are very virtuous people among all these
nations.
“I will cite a single example. As regards women, duty begins in England
at nine years of age; in France at fifteen. As for me, I take a little
of each people's notion of duty, and of the whole I make a result
comparable to the morality of good King Solomon.
“July 27th.—Good news. I have lost 620 grams in weight. Excellent, this
water of Chatel-Guyon! I am taking the widows to dine at Riom. A sad
town whose anagram constitutes it an objectionable neighbor to healing
springs: Riom, Mori.
“July 28th.—Hello, how's this! My two widows have been visited by two
gentlemen who came to look for them. Two widowers, without doubt. They
are leaving this evening. They have written to me on fancy notepaper.
“July 29th.—Alone! Long excursion on foot to the extinct crater of
Nachere. Splendid view.
“July 30th.—Nothing. I am taking the treatment.
“July 31st.—Ditto. Ditto. This pretty country is full of polluted
streams. I am drawing the notice of the municipality to the abominable
sewer which poisons the road in front of the hotel. All the kitchen
refuse of the establishment is thrown into it. This is a good way to
breed cholera.
“August 1st.—Nothing. The treatment.
“August 2d.—Admirable walk to Chateauneuf, a place of sojourn for
rheumatic patients, where everybody is lame. Nothing can be queerer than
this population of cripples!
“August 3d.—Nothing. The treatment.
“August 4th.—Ditto. Ditto.
“August 5th.—Ditto. Ditto.
“August 6th.—Despair! I have just weighed myself. I have gained 310
grams. But then?
“August 7th.—Drove sixty-six kilometres in a carriage on the mountain. I
will not mention the name of the country through respect for its women.
“This excursion had been pointed out to me as a beautiful one, and one
that was rarely made. After four hours on the road, I arrived at a
rather pretty village on the banks of a river in the midst of an
admirable wood of walnut trees. I had not yet seen a forest of walnut
trees of such dimensions in Auvergne. It constitutes, moreover, all the
wealth of the district, for it is planted on the village common. This
common was formerly only a hillside covered with brushwood. The
authorities had tried in vain to get it cultivated. There was scarcely
enough pasture on it to feed a few sheep.
“To-day it is a superb wood, thanks to the women, and it has a curious
name: it is called the Sins of the Cure.
“Now I must say that the women of the mountain districts have the
reputation of being light, lighter than in the plain. A bachelor who
meets them owes them at least a kiss; and if he does not take more he is
only a blockhead. If we consider this fairly, this way of looking at the
matter is the only one that is logical and reasonable. As woman, whether
she be of the town or the country, has her natural mission to please
man, man should always show her that she pleases him. If he abstains
from every sort of demonstration, this means that he considers her ugly;
it is almost an insult to her. If I were a woman, I would not receive, a
second time, a man who failed to show me respect at our first meeting,
for I would consider that he had failed in appreciation of my beauty, my
charm, and my feminine qualities.
“So the bachelors of the village X often proved to the women of the
district that they found them to their taste, and, as the cure was
unable to prevent these demonstrations, as gallant as they were natural,
he resolved to utilize them for the benefit of the general prosperity.
So he imposed as a penance on every woman who had gone wrong that she
should plant a walnut tree on the common. And every night lanterns were
seen moving about like will-o'-the-wisps on the hillock, for the erring
ones scarcely like to perform their penance in broad daylight.
“In two years there was no longer any room on the lands belonging to the
village, and to-day they calculate that there are more than three
thousand trees around the belfry which rings out the services amid their
foliage. These are the Sins of the Cure.
“Since we have been seeking for so many ways of rewooding France, the
Administration of Forests might surely enter into some arrangement with
the clergy to employ a method so simple as that employed by this humble
cure.
“August 7th.—Treatment.
“August 8th.—I am packing up my trunks and saying good-by to the
charming little district so calm and silent, to the green mountain, to
the quiet valleys, to the deserted Casino, from which you can see,
almost veiled by its light, bluish mist, the immense plain of the
Limagne.
“I shall leave to-morrow.”
Here the manuscript stopped. I will add nothing to it, my impressions of
the country not having been exactly the same as those of my predecessor.
For I did not find the two widows!
“THE TERROR”
You say you cannot possibly understand it, and I believe you. You think
I am losing my mind? Perhaps I am, but for other reasons than those you
imagine, my dear friend.
Yes, I am going to be married, and will tell you what has led me to take
that step.
I may add that I know very little of the girl who is going to become my
wife to-morrow; I have only seen her four or five times. I know that
there is nothing unpleasing about her, and that is enough for my
purpose. She is small, fair, and stout; so, of course, the day after to-
morrow I shall ardently wish for a tall, dark, thin woman.
She is not rich, and belongs to the middle classes. She is a girl such
as you may find by the gross, well adapted for matrimony, without any
apparent faults, and with no particularly striking qualities. People say
of her:
“Mlle. Lajolle is a very nice girl,” and tomorrow they will say: “What a
very nice woman Madame Raymon is.” She belongs, in a word, to that
immense number of girls whom one is glad to have for one's wife, till
the moment comes when one discovers that one happens to prefer all other
women to that particular woman whom one has married.
“Well,” you will say to me, “what on earth did you get married for?”
I hardly like to tell you the strange and seemingly improbable reason
that urged me on to this senseless act; the fact, however, is that I am
afraid of being alone.
I don't know how to tell you or to make you understand me, but my state
of mind is so wretched that you will pity me and despise me.
I do not want to be alone any longer at night. I want to feel that there
is some one close to me, touching me, a being who can speak and say
something, no matter what it be.
I wish to be able to awaken somebody by my side, so that I may be able
to ask some sudden question, a stupid question even, if I feel inclined,
so that I may hear a human voice, and feel that there is some waking
soul close to me, some one whose reason is at work; so that when I
hastily light the candle I may see some human face by my
side—because—because —I am ashamed to confess it—because I am afraid of
being alone.
Oh, you don't understand me yet.
I am not afraid of any danger; if a man were to come into the room, I
should kill him without trembling. I am not afraid of ghosts, nor do I
believe in the supernatural. I am not afraid of dead people, for I
believe in the total annihilation of every being that disappears from
the face of this earth.
Well—yes, well, it must be told: I am afraid of myself, afraid of that
horrible sensation of incomprehensible fear.
You may laugh, if you like. It is terrible, and I cannot get over it. I
am afraid of the walls, of the furniture, of the familiar objects; which
are animated, as far as I am concerned, by a kind of animal life. Above
all, I am afraid of my own dreadful thoughts, of my reason, which seems
as if it were about to leave me, driven away by a mysterious and
invisible agony.
At first I feel a vague uneasiness in my mind, which causes a cold
shiver to run all over me. I look round, and of course nothing is to be
seen, and I wish that there were something there, no matter what, as
long as it were something tangible. I am frightened merely because I
cannot understand my own terror.
If I speak, I am afraid of my own voice. If I walk, I am afraid of I
know not what, behind the door, behind the curtains, in the cupboard, or
under my bed, and yet all the time I know there is nothing anywhere, and
I turn round suddenly because I am afraid of what is behind me, although
there is nothing there, and I know it.
I become agitated. I feel that my fear increases, and so I shut myself
up in my own room, get into bed, and hide under the clothes; and there,
cowering down, rolled into a ball, I close my eyes in despair, and
remain thus for an indefinite time, remembering that my candle is alight
on the table by my bedside, and that I ought to put it out, and yet—I
dare not do it.
It is very terrible, is it not, to be like that?
Formerly I felt nothing of all that. I came home quite calm, and went up
and down my apartment without anything disturbing my peace of mind. Had
any one told me that I should be attacked by a malady—for I can call it
nothing else—of most improbable fear, such a stupid and terrible malady
as it is, I should have laughed outright. I was certainly never afraid
of opening the door in the dark. I went to bed slowly, without locking
it, and never got up in the middle of the night to make sure that
everything was firmly closed.
It began last year in a very strange manner on a damp autumn evening.
When my servant had left the room, after I had dined, I asked myself
what I was going to do. I walked up and down my room for some time,
feeling tired without any reason for it, unable to work, and even
without energy to read. A fine rain was falling, and I felt unhappy, a
prey to one of those fits of despondency, without any apparent cause,
which make us feel inclined to cry, or to talk, no matter to whom, so as
to shake off our depressing thoughts.
I felt that I was alone, and my rooms seemed to me to be more empty than
they had ever been before. I was in the midst of infinite and
overwhelming solitude. What was I to do? I sat down, but a kind of
nervous impatience seemed to affect my legs, so I got up and began to
walk about again. I was, perhaps, rather feverish, for my hands, which I
had clasped behind me, as one often does when walking slowly, almost
seemed to burn one another. Then suddenly a cold shiver ran down my
back, and I thought the damp air might have penetrated into my rooms, so
I lit the fire for the first time that year, and sat down again and
looked at the flames. But soon I felt that I could not possibly remain
quiet, and so I got up again and determined to go out, to pull myself
together, and to find a friend to bear me company.
I could not find anyone, so I walked to the boulevard to try and meet
some acquaintance or other there.
It was wretched everywhere, and the wet pavement glistened in the
gaslight, while the oppressive warmth of the almost impalpable rain lay
heavily over the streets and seemed to obscure the light of the lamps.
I went on slowly, saying to myself: “I shall not find a soul to talk
to.”
I glanced into several cafes, from the Madeleine as far as the Faubourg
Poissoniere, and saw many unhappy-looking individuals sitting at the
tables who did not seem even to have enough energy left to finish the
refreshments they had ordered.
For a long time I wandered aimlessly up and down, and about midnight I
started for home. I was very calm and very tired. My janitor opened the
door at once, which was quite unusual for him, and I thought that
another lodger had probably just come in.
When I go out I always double-lock the door of my room, and I found it
merely closed, which surprised me; but I supposed that some letters had
been brought up for me in the course of the evening.
I went in, and found my fire still burning so that it lighted up the
room a little, and, while in the act of taking up a candle, I noticed
somebody sitting in my armchair by the fire, warming his feet, with his
back toward me.
I was not in the slightest degree frightened. I thought, very naturally,
that some friend or other had come to see me. No doubt the porter, to
whom I had said I was going out, had lent him his own key. In a moment I
remembered all the circumstances of my return, how the street door had
been opened immediately, and that my own door was only latched and not
locked.
I could see nothing of my friend but his head, and he had evidently gone
to sleep while waiting for me, so I went up to him to rouse him. I saw
him quite distinctly; his right arm was hanging down and his legs were
crossed; the position of his head, which was somewhat inclined to the
left of the armchair, seemed to indicate that he was asleep. “Who can it
be?” I asked myself. I could not see clearly, as the room was rather
dark, so I put out my hand to touch him on the shoulder, and it came in
contact with the back of the chair. There was nobody there; the seat was
empty.
I fairly jumped with fright. For a moment I drew back as if confronted
by some terrible danger; then I turned round again, impelled by an
imperious standing upright, panting with fear, so upset that I could not
collect my thoughts, and ready to faint.
But I am a cool man, and soon recovered myself. I thought: “It is a mere
hallucination, that is all,” and I immediately began to reflect on this
phenomenon. Thoughts fly quickly at such moments.
I had been suffering from an hallucination, that was an incontestable
fact. My mind had been perfectly lucid and had acted regularly and
logically, so there was nothing the matter with the brain. It was only
my eyes that had been deceived; they had had a vision, one of those
visions which lead simple folk to believe in miracles. It was a nervous
seizure of the optical apparatus, nothing more; the eyes were rather
congested, perhaps.
I lit my candle, and when I stooped down to the fire in doing so I
noticed that I was trembling, and I raised myself up with a jump, as if
somebody had touched me from behind.
I was certainly not by any means calm.
I walked up and down a little, and hummed a tune or two. Then I double-
locked the door and felt rather reassured; now, at any rate, nobody
could come in.
I sat down again and thought over my adventure for a long time; then I
went to bed and blew out my light.
For some minutes all went well; I lay quietly on my back, but presently
an irresistible desire seized me to look round the room, and I turned
over on my side.
My fire was nearly out, and the few glowing embers threw a faint light
on the floor by the chair, where I fancied I saw the man sitting again.
I quickly struck a match, but I had been mistaken; there was nothing
there. I got up, however, and hid the chair behind my bed, and tried to
get to sleep, as the room was now dark; but I had not forgotten myself
for more than five minutes, when in my dream I saw all the scene which I
had previously witnessed as clearly as if it were reality. I woke up
with a start, and having lit the candle, sat up in bed, without
venturing even to try to go to sleep again.
Twice, however, sleep overcame me for a few moments in spite of myself,
and twice I saw the same thing again, till I fancied I was going mad.
When day broke, however, I thought that I was cured, and slept
peacefully till noon.
It was all past and over. I had been feverish, had had the nightmare. I
know not what. I had been ill, in fact, but yet thought I was a great
fool.
I enjoyed myself thoroughly that evening. I dined at a restaurant and
afterward went to the theatre, and then started for home. But as I got
near the house I was once more seized by a strange feeling of
uneasiness. I was afraid of seeing him again. I was not afraid of him,
not afraid of his presence, in which I did not believe; but I was afraid
of being deceived again. I was afraid of some fresh hallucination,
afraid lest fear should take possession of me.
For more than an hour I wandered up and down the pavement; then, feeling
that I was really too foolish, I returned home. I breathed so hard that
I could hardly get upstairs, and remained standing outside my door for
more than ten minutes; then suddenly I had a courageous impulse and my
will asserted itself. I inserted my key into the lock, and went into the
apartment with a candle in my hand. I kicked open my bedroom door, which
was partly open, and cast a frightened glance toward the fireplace.
There was nothing there. A-h! What a relief and what a delight! What a
deliverance! I walked up and down briskly and boldly, but I was not
altogether reassured, and kept turning round with a jump; the very
shadows in the corners disquieted me.
I slept badly, and was constantly disturbed by imaginary noises, but did
not see him; no, that was all over.
Since that time I have been afraid of being alone at night. I feel that
the spectre is there, close to me, around me; but it has not appeared to
me again.
And supposing it did, what would it matter, since I do not believe in
it, and know that it is nothing?
However, it still worries me, because I am constantly thinking of it.
His right arm hanging down and his head inclined to the left like a man
who was asleep—I don't want to think about it!
Why, however, am I so persistently possessed with this idea? His feet
were close to the fire!
He haunts me; it is very stupid, but who and what is he? I know that he
does not exist except in my cowardly imagination, in my fears, and in my
agony. There—enough of that!
Yes, it is all very well for me to reason with myself, to stiffen my
backbone, so to say; but I cannot remain at home because I know he is
there. I know I shall not see him again; he will not show himself again;
that is all over. But he is there, all the same, in my thoughts. He
remains invisible, but that does not prevent his being there. He is
behind the doors, in the closed cupboard, in the wardrobe, under the
bed, in every dark corner. If I open the door or the cupboard, if I take
the candle to look under the bed and throw a light on the dark places he
is there no longer, but I feel that he is behind me. I turn round,
certain that I shall not see him, that I shall never see him again; but
for all that, he is behind me.
It is very stupid, it is dreadful; but what am I to do? I cannot help
it.
But if there were two of us in the place I feel certain that he would
not be there any longer, for he is there just because I am alone, simply
and solely because I am alone!
LEGEND OF MONT ST. MICHEL
I had first seen it from Cancale, this fairy castle in the sea. I got an
indistinct impression of it as of a gray shadow outlined against the
misty sky. I saw it again from Avranches at sunset. The immense stretch
of sand was red, the horizon was red, the whole boundless bay was red.
The rocky castle rising out there in the distance like a weird,
seignorial residence, like a dream palace, strange and beautiful-this
alone remained black in the crimson light of the dying day.
The following morning at dawn I went toward it across the sands, my eyes
fastened on this, gigantic jewel, as big as a mountain, cut like a
cameo, and as dainty as lace. The nearer I approached the greater my
admiration grew, for nothing in the world could be more wonderful or
more perfect.
As surprised as if I had discovered the habitation of a god, I wandered
through those halls supported by frail or massive columns, raising my
eyes in wonder to those spires which looked like rockets starting for
the sky, and to that marvellous assemblage of towers, of gargoyles, of
slender and charming ornaments, a regular fireworks of stone, granite
lace, a masterpiece of colossal and delicate architecture.
As I was looking up in ecstasy a Lower Normandy peasant came up to me
and told me the story of the great quarrel between Saint Michael and the
devil.
A sceptical genius has said: “God made man in his image and man has
returned the compliment.”
This saying is an eternal truth, and it would be very curious to write
the history of the local divinity of every continent as well as the
history of the patron saints in each one of our provinces. The negro has
his ferocious man-eating idols; the polygamous Mahometan fills his
paradise with women; the Greeks, like a practical people, deified all
the passions.
Every village in France is under the influence of some protecting saint,
modelled according to the characteristics of the inhabitants.
Saint Michael watches over Lower Normandy, Saint Michael, the radiant
and victorious angel, the sword-carrier, the hero of Heaven, the
victorious, the conqueror of Satan.
But this is how the Lower Normandy peasant, cunning, deceitful and
tricky, understands and tells of the struggle between the great saint
and the devil.
To escape from the malice of his neighbor, the devil, Saint Michael
built himself, in the open ocean, this habitation worthy of an
archangel; and only such a saint could build a residence of such
magnificence.
But as he still feared the approaches of the wicked one, he surrounded
his domains by quicksands, more treacherous even than the sea.
The devil lived in a humble cottage on the hill, but he owned all the
salt marshes, the rich lands where grow the finest crops, the wooded
valleys and all the fertile hills of the country, while the saint ruled
only over the sands. Therefore Satan was rich, whereas Saint Michael was
as poor as a church mouse.
After a few years of fasting the saint grew tired of this state of
affairs and began to think of some compromise with the devil, but the
matter was by no means easy, as Satan kept a good hold on his crops.
He thought the thing over for about six months; then one morning he
walked across to the shore. The demon was eating his soup in front of
his door when he saw the saint. He immediately rushed toward him, kissed
the hem of his sleeve, invited him in and offered him refreshments.
Saint Michael drank a bowl of milk and then began: “I have come here to
propose to you a good bargain.”
The devil, candid and trustful, answered: “That will suit me.”
“Here it is. Give me all your lands.”
Satan, growing alarmed, wished to speak “But—”
The saint continued: “Listen first. Give me all your lands. I will take
care of all the work, the ploughing, the sowing, the fertilizing,
everything, and we will share the crops equally. How does that suit
you?”
The devil, who was naturally lazy, accepted. He only demanded in
addition a few of those delicious gray mullet which are caught around
the solitary mount. Saint Michael promised the fish.
They grasped hands and spat on the ground to show that it was a bargain,
and the saint continued: “See here, so that you will have nothing to
complain of, choose that part of the crops which you prefer: the part
that grows above ground or the part that stays in the ground.” Satan
cried out: “I will take all that will be above ground.”
“It's a bargain!” said the saint. And he went away.
Six months later, all over the immense domain of the devil, one could
see nothing but carrots, turnips, onions, salsify, all the plants whose
juicy roots are good and savory and whose useless leaves are good for
nothing but for feeding animals.
Satan wished to break the contract, calling Saint Michael a swindler.
But the saint, who had developed quite a taste for agriculture, went
back to see the devil and said:
“Really, I hadn't thought of that at all; it was just an accident, no
fault of mine. And to make things fair with you, this year I'll let you
take everything that is under the ground.”
“Very well,” answered Satan.
The following spring all the evil spirit's lands were covered with
golden wheat, oats as big as beans, flax, magnificent colza, red clover,
peas, cabbage, artichokes, everything that develops into grains or fruit
in the sunlight.
Once more Satan received nothing, and this time he completely lost his
temper. He took back his fields and remained deaf to all the fresh
propositions of his neighbor.
A whole year rolled by. From the top of his lonely manor Saint Michael
looked at the distant and fertile lands and watched the devil direct the
work, take in his crops and thresh the wheat. And he grew angry,
exasperated at his powerlessness.
As he was no longer able to deceive Satan, he decided to wreak vengeance
on him, and he went out to invite him to dinner for the following
Monday.
“You have been very unfortunate in your dealings with me,” he said; “I
know it, but I don't want any ill feeling between us, and I expect you
to dine with me. I'll give you some good things to eat.”
Satan, who was as greedy as he was lazy, accepted eagerly. On the day
appointed he donned his finest clothes and set out for the castle.
Saint Michael sat him down to a magnificent meal. First there was a
'vol-au-vent', full of cocks' crests and kidneys, with meat-balls, then
two big gray mullet with cream sauce, a turkey stuffed with chestnuts
soaked in wine, some salt-marsh lamb as tender as cake, vegetables which
melted in the mouth and nice hot pancake which was brought on smoking
and spreading a delicious odor of butter.
They drank new, sweet, sparkling cider and heady red wine, and after
each course they whetted their appetites with some old apple brandy.
The devil drank and ate to his heart's content; in fact he took so much
that he was very uncomfortable, and began to retch.
Then Saint Michael arose in anger and cried in a voice like thunder:
“What! before me, rascal! You dare—before me—”
Satan, terrified, ran away, and the saint, seizing a stick, pursued him.
They ran through the halls, turning round the pillars, running up the
staircases, galloping along the cornices, jumping from gargoyle to
gargoyle. The poor devil, who was woefully ill, was running about madly
and trying hard to escape. At last he found himself at the top of the
last terrace, right at the top, from which could be seen the immense
bay, with its distant towns, sands and pastures. He could no longer
escape, and the saint came up behind him and gave him a furious kick,
which shot him through space like a cannonball.
He shot through the air like a javelin and fell heavily before the town
of Mortain. His horns and claws stuck deep into the rock, which keeps
through eternity the traces of this fall of Satan.
He stood up again, limping, crippled until the end of time, and as he
looked at this fatal castle in the distance, standing out against the
setting sun, he understood well that he would always be vanquished in
this unequal struggle, and he went away limping, heading for distant
countries, leaving to his enemy his fields, his hills, his valleys and
his marshes.
And this is how Saint Michael, the patron saint of Normandy, vanquished
the devil.
Another people would have dreamed of this battle in an entirely
different manner.
A NEW YEAR'S GIFT
Jacques de Randal, having dined at home alone, told his valet he might
go out, and he sat down at his table to write some letters.
He ended every year in this manner, writing and dreaming. He reviewed
the events of his life since last New Year's Day, things that were now
all over and dead; and, in proportion as the faces of his friends rose
up before his eyes, he wrote them a few lines, a cordial New Year's
greeting on the first of January.
So he sat down, opened a drawer, took out of it a woman's photograph,
gazed at it a few moments, and kissed it. Then, having laid it beside a
sheet of notepaper, he began:
“MY DEAR IRENE: You must by this time have received the little souvenir
I sent you addressed to the maid. I have shut myself up this evening in
order to tell you——”
The pen here ceased to move. Jacques rose up and began walking up and
down the room.
For the last ten months he had had a sweetheart, not like the others, a
woman with whom one engages in a passing intrigue, of the theatrical
world or the demi-monde, but a woman whom he loved and won. He was no
longer a young man, although he was still comparatively young for a man,
and he looked on life seriously in a positive and practical spirit.
Accordingly, he drew up the balance sheet of his passion, as he drew up
every year the balance sheet of friendships that were ended or freshly
contracted, of circumstances and persons that had entered into his life.
His first ardor of love having grown calmer, he asked himself with the
precision of a merchant making a calculation what was the state of his
heart with regard to her, and he tried to form an idea of what it would
be in the future.
He found there a great and deep affection; made up of tenderness,
gratitude and the thousand subtleties which give birth to long and
powerful attachments.
A ring at the bell made him start. He hesitated. Should he open the
door? But he said to himself that one must always open the door on New
Year's night, to admit the unknown who is passing by and knocks, no
matter who it may be.
So he took a wax candle, passed through the antechamber, drew back the
bolts, turned the key, pulled the door back, and saw his sweetheart
standing pale as a corpse, leaning against the wall.
He stammered:
“What is the matter with you?”
She replied:
“Are you alone?”
“Yes.”
“Without servants?”
“Yes.”
“You are not going out?”
“No.”
She entered with the air of a woman who knew the house. As soon as she
was in the drawing-room, she sank down on the sofa, and, covering her
face with her hands, began to weep bitterly.
He knelt down at her feet, and tried to remove her hands from her eyes,
so that he might look at them, and exclaimed:
“Irene, Irene, what is the matter with you? I implore you to tell me
what is the matter with you?”
Then, amid her sobs, she murmured:
“I can no longer live like this.”
“Live like this? What do you mean?”
“Yes. I can no longer live like this. I have endured so much. He struck
me this afternoon.”
“Who? Your husband?”
“Yes, my husband.”
“Ah!”
He was astonished, having never suspected that her husband could be
brutal. He was a man of the world, of the better class, a clubman, a
lover of horses, a theatergoer and an expert swordsman; he was known,
talked about, appreciated everywhere, having very courteous manners, a
very mediocre intellect, an absence of education and of the real culture
needed in order to think like all well-bred people, and finally a
respect for conventionalities.
He appeared to devote himself to his wife, as a man ought to do in the
case of wealthy and well-bred people. He displayed enough of anxiety
about her wishes, her health, her dresses, and, beyond that, left her
perfectly free.
Randal, having become Irene's friend, had a right to the affectionate
hand-clasp which every husband endowed with good manners owes to his
wife's intimate acquaintance. Then, when Jacques, after having been for
some time the friend, became the lover, his relations with the husband
were more cordial, as is fitting.
Jacques had never dreamed that there were storms in this household, and
he was bewildered at this unexpected revelation.
He asked:
“How did it happen? Tell me.”
Thereupon she related a long story, the entire history of her life since
the day of her marriage, the first disagreement arising out of a mere
nothing, then becoming accentuated at every new difference of opinion
between two dissimilar dispositions.
Then came quarrels, a complete separation, not apparent, but real; next,
her husband showed himself aggressive, suspicious, violent. Now, he was
jealous, jealous of Jacques, and that very day, after a scene, he had
struck her.
She added with decision: “I will not go back to him. Do with me what you
like.”
Jacques sat down opposite to her, their knees touching. He took her
hands:
“My dear love, you are going to commit a gross, an irreparable folly. If
you want to leave your husband, put him in the wrong, so that your
position as a woman of the world may be saved.”
She asked, as she looked at him uneasily:
“Then, what do you advise me?”
“To go back home and to put up with your life there till the day when
you can obtain either a separation or a divorce, with the honors of
war.”
“Is not this thing which you advise me to do a little cowardly?”
“No; it is wise and sensible. You have a high position, a reputation to
protect, friends to preserve and relations to deal with. You must not
lose all these through a mere caprice.”
She rose up, and said with violence:
“Well, no! I cannot stand it any longer! It is at an end! it is at an
end!”
Then, placing her two hands on her lover's shoulders, and looking him
straight in the face, she asked:
“Do you love me?”
“Yes.”
“Really and truly?”
“Yes.”
“Then take care of me.”
He exclaimed:
“Take care of you? In my own house? Here? Why, you are mad. It would
mean losing you forever; losing you beyond hope of recall! You are mad!”
She replied, slowly and seriously, like a woman who feels the weight of
her words:
“Listen, Jacques. He has forbidden me to see you again, and I will not
play this comedy of coming secretly to your house. You must either lose
me or take me.”
“My dear Irene, in that case, obtain your divorce, and I will marry
you.”
“Yes, you will marry me in—two years at the soonest. Yours is a patient
love.”
“Look here! Reflect! If you remain here he'll come to-morrow to take you
away, seeing that he is your husband, seeing that he has right and law
on his side.”
“I did not ask you to keep me in your own house, Jacques, but to take me
anywhere you like. I thought you loved me enough to do that. I have made
a mistake. Good-by!”
She turned round and went toward the door so quickly that he was only
able to catch hold of her when she was outside the room:
“Listen, Irene.”
She struggled, and would not listen to him. Her eyes were full of tears,
and she stammered:
“Let me alone! let me alone! let me alone!”
He made her sit down by force, and once more falling on his knees at her
feet, he now brought forward a number of arguments and counsels to make
her understand the folly and terrible risk of her project. He omitted
nothing which he deemed necessary to convince her, finding even in his
very affection for her incentives to persuasion.
As she remained silent and cold as ice, he begged of her, implored of
her to listen to him, to trust him, to follow his advice.
When he had finished speaking, she only replied:
“Are you disposed to let me go away now? Take away your hands, so that I
may rise to my feet.”
“Look here, Irene.”
“Will you let me go?”
“Irene—is your resolution irrevocable?”
“Will you let me go.”
“Tell me only whether this resolution, this mad resolution of yours,
which you will bitterly regret, is irrevocable?”
“Yes—let me go!”
“Then stay. You know well that you are at home here. We shall go away
to-morrow morning.”
She rose to her feet in spite of him, and said in a hard tone:
“No. It is too late. I do not want sacrifice; I do not want devotion.”
“Stay! I have done what I ought to do; I have said what I ought to say.
I have no further responsibility on your behalf. My conscience is at
peace. Tell me what you want me to do, and I will obey.”'
She resumed her seat, looked at him for a long time, and then asked, in
a very calm voice:
“Well, then, explain.”
“Explain what? What do you wish me to explain?”
“Everything—everything that you thought about before changing your mind.
Then I will see what I ought to do.”
“But I thought about nothing at all. I had to warn you that you were
going to commit an act of folly. You persist; then I ask to share in
this act of folly, and I even insist on it.”
“It is not natural to change one's mind so quickly.”
“Listen, my dear love. It is not a question here of sacrifice or
devotion. On the day when I realized that I loved you, I said to myself
what every lover ought to say to himself in the same case: 'The man who
loves a woman, who makes an effort to win her, who gets her, and who
takes her, enters into a sacred contract with himself and with her. That
is, of course, in dealing with a woman like you, not a woman with a
fickle heart and easily impressed.'
“Marriage which has a great social value, a great legal value, possesses
in my eyes only a very slight moral value, taking into account the
conditions under which it generally takes place.
“Therefore, when a woman, united by this lawful bond, but having no
attachment to her husband, whom she cannot love, a woman whose heart is
free, meets a man whom she cares for, and gives herself to him, when a
man who has no other tie, takes a woman in this way, I say that they
pledge themselves toward each other by this mutual and free agreement
much more than by the 'Yes' uttered in the presence of the mayor.
“I say that, if they are both honorable persons, their union must be
more intimate, more real, more wholesome, than if all the sacraments had
consecrated it.
“This woman risks everything. And it is exactly because she knows it,
because she gives everything, her heart, her body, her soul, her honor,
her life, because she has foreseen all miseries, all dangers all
catastrophes, because she dares to do a bold act, an intrepid act,
because she is prepared, determined to brave everything—her husband, who
might kill her, and society, which may cast her out. This is why she is
worthy of respect in the midst of her conjugal infidelity; this is why
her lover, in taking her, should also foresee everything, and prefer her
to every one else whatever may happen. I have nothing more to say. I
spoke in the beginning like a sensible man whose duty it was to warn
you; and now I am only a man—a man who loves you—Command, and I obey.”
Radiant, she closed his mouth with a kiss, and said in a low tone:
“It is not true, darling! There is nothing the matter! My husband does
not suspect anything. But I wanted to see, I wanted to know, what you
would do. I wished for a New Year's gift—the gift of your heart—another
gift besides the necklace you sent me. You have given it to me. Thanks!
thanks! God be thanked for the happiness you have given me!”
FRIEND PATIENCE What became of Leremy?”
“He is captain in the Sixth Dragoons.”
“And Pinson?”
“He's a subprefect.”
“And Racollet?”
“Dead.”
We were searching for other names which would remind us of the youthful
faces of our younger days. Once in a while we had met some of these old
comrades, bearded, bald, married, fathers of several children, and the
realization of these changes had given us an unpleasant shudder,
reminding us how short life is, how everything passes away, how
everything changes. My friend asked me:
“And Patience, fat Patience?”
I almost, howled:
“Oh! as for him, just listen to this. Four or five years ago I was in
Limoges, on a tour of inspection, and I was waiting for dinner time. I
was seated before the big cafe in the Place du Theatre, just bored to
death. The tradespeople were coming by twos, threes or fours, to take
their absinthe or vermouth, talking all the time of their own or other
people's business, laughing loudly, or lowering their voices in order to
impart some important or delicate piece of news.
“I was saying to myself: 'What shall I do after dinner?' And I thought
of the long evening in this provincial town, of the slow, dreary walk
through unknown streets, of the impression of deadly gloom which these
provincial people produce on the lonely traveller, and of the whole
oppressive atmosphere of the place.
“I was thinking of all these things as I watched the little jets of gas
flare up, feeling my loneliness increase with the falling shadows.
“A big, fat man sat down at the next table and called in a stentorian
voice:
“'Waiter, my bitters!'
“The 'my' came out like the report of a cannon. I immediately understood
that everything was his in life, and not another's; that he had his
nature, by Jove, his appetite, his trousers, his everything, his, more
absolutely and more completely than anyone else's. Then he looked round
him with a satisfied air. His bitters were brought, and he ordered:
“'My newspaper!'
“I wondered: 'Which newspaper can his be?' The title would certainly
reveal to me his opinions, his theories, his principles, his hobbies,
his weaknesses.
“The waiter brought the Temps. I was surprised. Why the Temps, a
serious, sombre, doctrinaire, impartial sheet? I thought:
“'He must be a serious man with settled and regular habits; in short, a
good bourgeois.'
“He put on his gold-rimmed spectacles, leaned back before beginning to
read, and once more glanced about him. He noticed me, and immediately
began to stare at me in an annoying manner. I was even going to ask the
reason for this attention, when he exclaimed from his seat:
“'Well, by all that's holy, if this isn't Gontran Lardois.'
“I answered:
“'Yes, monsieur, you are not mistaken.'
“Then he quickly rose and came toward me with hands outstretched:
“'Well, old man, how are you?'
“As I did not recognize him at all I was greatly embarrassed. I
stammered:
“'Why-very well-and-you?'
“He began to laugh “'I bet you don't recognize me.'
“'No, not exactly. It seems—however—'
“He slapped me on the back:
“'Come on, no joking! I am Patience, Robert Patience, your friend, your
chum.'
“I recognized him. Yes, Robert Patience, my old college chum. It was he.
I took his outstretched hand:
“'And how are you?'
“'Fine!'
“His smile was like a paean of victory.
“He asked:
“'What are you doing here?'
“I explained that I was government inspector of taxes.
“He continued, pointing to my red ribbon:
“'Then you have-been a success?'
“I answered:
“'Fairly so. And you?'
“'I am doing well!'
“'What are you doing?'
“'I'm in business.'
“'Making money?'
“'Heaps. I'm very rich. But come around to lunch, to-morrow noon, 17 Rue
du Coq-qui-Chante; you will see my place.'
“He seemed to hesitate a second, then continued:
“'Are you still the good sport that you used to be?'
“'I—I hope so.'
“'Not married?'
“'No.'
“'Good. And do you still love a good time and potatoes?'
“I was beginning to find him hopelessly vulgar. Nevertheless, I answered
“'Yes.'
“'And pretty girls?'
“'Most assuredly.'
“He began to laugh good-humoredly.
“'Good, good! Do you remember our first escapade, in Bordeaux, after
that dinner at Routie's? What a spree!'
“I did, indeed, remember that spree; and the recollection of it cheered
me up. This called to mind other pranks. He would say:
“'Say, do you remember the time when we locked the proctor up in old man
Latoque's cellar?'
“And he laughed and banged the table with his fist, and then he
continued:
“'Yes-yes-yes-and do you remember the face of the geography teacher, M.
Marin, the day we set off a firecracker in the globe, just as he was
haranguing about the principal volcanoes of the earth?'
“Then suddenly I asked him:
“'And you, are you married?'
“He exclaimed:
“'Ten years, my boy, and I have four children, remarkable youngsters;
but you'll see them and their mother.'
“We were talking rather loud; the people around us looked at us in
surprise.
“Suddenly my friend looked at his watch, a chronometer the size of a
pumpkin, and he cried:
“'Thunder! I'm sorry, but I'll have to leave you; I am never free at
night.'
“He rose, took both my hands, shook them as though he were trying to
wrench my arms from their sockets, and exclaimed:
“'So long, then; till to-morrow noon!'
“'So long!'
“I spent the morning working in the office of the collector-general of
the Department. The chief wished me to stay to luncheon, but I told him
that I had an engagement with a friend. As he had to go out, he
accompanied me.
“I asked him:
“'Can you tell me how I can find the Rue du Coq-qui-Chante?'
“He answered:
“'Yes, it's only five minutes' walk from here. As I have nothing special
to do, I will take you there.'
“We started out and soon found ourselves there. It was a wide, fine-
looking street, on the outskirts of the town. I looked at the houses and
I noticed No. 17. It was a large house with a garden behind it. The
facade, decorated with frescoes, in the Italian style, appeared to me as
being in bad taste. There were goddesses holding vases, others swathed
in clouds. Two stone cupids supported the number of the house.
“I said to the treasurer:
“'Here is where I am going.'
“I held my hand out to him. He made a quick, strange gesture, said
nothing and shook my hand.
“I rang. A maid appeared. I asked:
“'Monsieur Patience, if you please?'
“She answered:
“'Right here, sir. Is it to monsieur that you wish to speak?'
“'Yes.'
“The hall was decorated with paintings from the brush of some local
artist. Pauls and Virginias were kissing each other under palm trees
bathed in a pink light. A hideous Oriental lantern was ranging from the
ceiling. Several doors were concealed by bright hangings.
“But what struck me especially was the odor. It was a sickening and
perfumed odor, reminding one of rice powder and the mouldy smell of a
cellar. An indefinable odor in a heavy atmosphere as oppressive as that
of public baths. I followed the maid up a marble stairway, covered with
a green, Oriental carpet, and was ushered into a sumptubus parlor.
“Left alone, I looked about me.
“The room was richly furnished, but in the pretentious taste of a
parvenu. Rather fine engravings of the last century represented women
with powdered hair dressed high surprised by gentlemen in interesting
positions. Another lady, lying in a large bed, was teasing with her foot
a little dog, lost in the sheets. One drawing showed four feet, bodies
concealed behind a curtain. The large room, surrounded by soft couches,
was entirely impregnated with that enervating and insipid odor which I
had already noticed. There seemed to be something suspicious about the
walls, the hangings, the exaggerated luxury, everything.
“I approached the window to look into the garden. It was very big,
shady, beautiful. A wide path wound round a grass plot in the midst of
which was a fountain, entered a shrubbery and came out farther away.
And, suddenly, yonder, in the distance, between two clumps of bushes,
three women appeared. They were walking slowly, arm in arm, clad in
long, white tea-gowns covered with lace. Two were blondes and the other
was dark-haired. Almost immediately they disappeared again behind the
trees. I stood there entranced, delighted with this short and charming
apparition, which brought to my mind a whole world of poetry. They had
scarcely allowed themselves to be seen, in just the proper light, in
that frame of foliage, in the midst of that mysterious, delightful park.
It seemed to me that I had suddenly seen before me the great ladies of
the last century, who were depicted in the engravings on the wall. And I
began to think of the happy, joyous, witty and amorous times when
manners were so graceful and lips so approachable.
“A deep voice made me jump. Patience had come in, beaming, and held out
his hands to me.
“He looked into my eyes with the sly look which one takes when divulging
secrets of love, and, with a Napoleonic gesture, he showed me his
sumptuous parlor, his park, the three women, who had reappeared in the
back of it, then, in a triumphant voice, where the note of pride was
prominent, he said:
“'And to think that I began with nothing—my wife and my sister-in-law!'”
ABANDONED
“I really think you must be mad, my dear, to go for a country walk in
such weather as this. You have had some very strange notions for the
last two months. You drag me to the seaside in spite of myself, when you
have never once had such a whim during all the forty-four years that we
have been married. You chose Fecamp, which is a very dull town, without
consulting me in the matter, and now you are seized with such a rage for
walking, you who hardly ever stir out on foot, that you want to take a
country walk on the hottest day of the year. Ask d'Apreval to go with
you, as he is ready to gratify all your whims. As for me, I am going
back to have a nap.”
Madame de Cadour turned to her old friend and said:
“Will you come with me, Monsieur d'Apreval?”
He bowed with a smile, and with all the gallantry of former years:
“I will go wherever you go,” he replied.
“Very well, then, go and get a sunstroke,” Monsieur de Cadour said; and
he went back to the Hotel des Bains to lie down for an hour or two.
As soon as they were alone, the old lady and her old companion set off,
and she said to him in a low voice, squeezing his hand:
“At last! at last!”
“You are mad,” he said in a whisper. “I assure you that you are mad.
Think of the risk you are running. If that man—”
She started.
“Oh! Henri, do not say that man, when you are speaking of him.”
“Very well,” he said abruptly, “if our son guesses anything, if he has
any suspicions, he will have you, he will have us both in his power. You
have got on without seeing him for the last forty years. What is the
matter with you to-day?”
They had been going up the long street that leads from the sea to the
town, and now they turned to the right, to go to Etretat. The white road
stretched in front of him, then under a blaze of brilliant sunshine, so
they went on slowly in the burning heat. She had taken her old friend's
arm, and was looking straight in front of her, with a fixed and haunted
gaze, and at last she said:
“And so you have not seen him again, either?”
“No, never.”
“Is it possible?”
“My dear friend, do not let us begin that discussion again. I have a
wife and children and you have a husband, so we both of us have much to
fear from other people's opinion.”
She did not reply; she was thinking of her long past youth and of many
sad things that had occurred. How well she recalled all the details of
their early friendship, his smiles, the way he used to linger, in order
to watch her until she was indoors. What happy days they were, the only
really delicious days she had ever enjoyed, and how quickly they were
over!
And then—her discovery—of the penalty she paid! What anguish!
Of that journey to the South, that long journey, her sufferings, her
constant terror, that secluded life in the small, solitary house on the
shores of the Mediterranean, at the bottom of a garden, which she did
not venture to leave. How well she remembered those long days which she
spent lying under an orange tree, looking up at the round, red fruit,
amid the green leaves. How she used to long to go out, as far as the
sea, whose fresh breezes came to her over the wall, and whose small
waves she could hear lapping on the beach. She dreamed of its immense
blue expanse sparkling under the sun, with the white sails of the small
vessels, and a mountain on the horizon. But she did not dare to go
outside the gate. Suppose anybody had recognized her!
And those days of waiting, those last days of misery and expectation!
The impending suffering, and then that terrible night! What misery she
had endured, and what a night it was! How she had groaned and screamed!
She could still see the pale face of her lover, who kissed her hand
every moment, and the clean-shaven face of the doctor and the nurse's
white cap.
And what she felt when she heard the child's feeble cries, that wail,
that first effort of a human's voice!
And the next day! the next day! the only day of her life on which she
had seen and kissed her son; for, from that time, she had never even
caught a glimpse of him.
And what a long, void existence hers had been since then, with the
thought of that child always, always floating before her. She had never
seen her son, that little creature that had been part of herself, even
once since then; they had taken him from her, carried him away, and had
hidden him. All she knew was that he had been brought up by some
peasants in Normandy, that he had become a peasant himself, had married
well, and that his father, whose name he did not know, had settled a
handsome sum of money on him.
How often during the last forty years had she wished to go and see him
and to embrace him! She could not imagine to herself that he had grown!
She always thought of that small human atom which she had held in her
arms and pressed to her bosom for a day.
How often she had said to M. d'Apreval: “I cannot bear it any longer; I
must go and see him.”
But he had always stopped her and kept her from going. She would be
unable to restrain and to master herself; their son would guess it and
take advantage of her, blackmail her; she would be lost.
“What is he like?” she said.
“I do not know. I have not seen him again, either.”
“Is it possible? To have a son and not to know him; to be afraid of him
and to reject him as if he were a disgrace! It is horrible.”
They went along the dusty road, overcome by the scorching sun, and
continually ascending that interminable hill.
“One might take it for a punishment,” she continued; “I have never had
another child, and I could no longer resist the longing to see him,
which has possessed me for forty years. You men cannot understand that.
You must remember that I shall not live much longer, and suppose I
should never see him, never have seen him! . . . Is it possible? How
could I wait so long? I have thought about him every day since, and what
a terrible existence mine has been! I have never awakened, never, do you
understand, without my first thoughts being of him, of my child. How is
he? Oh, how guilty I feel toward him! Ought one to fear what the world
may say in a case like this? I ought to have left everything to go after
him, to bring him up and to show my love for him. I should certainly
have been much happier, but I did not dare, I was a coward. How I have
suffered! Oh, how those poor, abandoned children must hate their
mothers!”
She stopped suddenly, for she was choked by her sobs. The whole valley
was deserted and silent in the dazzling light and the overwhelming heat,
and only the grasshoppers uttered their shrill, continuous chirp among
the sparse yellow grass on both sides of the road.
“Sit down a little,” he said.
She allowed herself to be led to the side of the ditch and sank down
with her face in her hands. Her white hair, which hung in curls on both
sides of her face, had become tangled. She wept, overcome by profound
grief, while he stood facing her, uneasy and not knowing what to say,
and he merely murmured: “Come, take courage.”
She got up.
“I will,” she said, and wiping her eyes, she began to walk again with
the uncertain step of an elderly woman.
A little farther on the road passed beneath a clump of trees, which hid
a few houses, and they could distinguish the vibrating and regular blows
of a blacksmith's hammer on the anvil; and presently they saw a wagon
standing on the right side of the road in front of a low cottage, and
two men shoeing a horse under a shed.
Monsieur d'Apreval went up to them.
“Where is Pierre Benedict's farm?” he asked.
“Take the road to the left, close to the inn, and then go straight on;
it is the third house past Poret's. There is a small spruce fir close to
the gate; you cannot make a mistake.”
They turned to the left. She was walking very slowly now, her legs
threatened to give way, and her heart was beating so violently that she
felt as if she should suffocate, while at every step she murmured, as if
in prayer:
“Oh! Heaven! Heaven!”
Monsieur d'Apreval, who was also nervous and rather pale, said to her
somewhat gruffly:
“If you cannot manage to control your feelings, you will betray yourself
at once. Do try and restrain yourself.”
“How can I?” she replied. “My child! When I think that I am going to see
my child.”
They were going along one of those narrow country lanes between
farmyards, that are concealed beneath a double row of beech trees at
either side of the ditches, and suddenly they found themselves in front
of a gate, beside which there was a young spruce fir.
“This is it,” he said.
She stopped suddenly and looked about her. The courtyard, which was
planted with apple trees, was large and extended as far as the small
thatched dwelling house. On the opposite side were the stable, the barn,
the cow house and the poultry house, while the gig, the wagon and the
manure cart were under a slated outhouse. Four calves were grazing under
the shade of the trees and black hens were wandering all about the
enclosure.
All was perfectly still; the house door was open, but nobody was to be
seen, and so they went in, when immediately a large black dog came out
of a barrel that was standing under a pear tree, and began to bark
furiously.
There were four bee-hives on boards against the wall of the house.
Monsieur d'Apreval stood outside and called out:
“Is anybody at home?”
Then a child appeared, a little girl of about ten, dressed in a chemise
and a linen, petticoat, with dirty, bare legs and a timid and cunning
look. She remained standing in the doorway, as if to prevent any one
going in.
“What do you want?” she asked.
“Is your father in?”
“No.”
“Where is he?”
“I don't know.”
“And your mother?”
“Gone after the cows.”
“Will she be back soon?”
“I don't know.”
Then suddenly the lady, as if she feared that her companion might force
her to return, said quickly:
“I shall not go without having seen him.”
“We will wait for him, my dear friend.”
As they turned away, they saw a peasant woman coming toward the house,
carrying two tin pails, which appeared to be heavy and which glistened
brightly in the sunlight.
She limped with her right leg, and in her brown knitted jacket, that was
faded by the sun and washed out by the rain, she looked like a poor,
wretched, dirty servant.
“Here is mamma,” the child said.
When she got close to the house, she looked at the strangers angrily and
suspiciously, and then she went in, as if she had not seen them. She
looked old and had a hard, yellow, wrinkled face, one of those wooden
faces that country people so often have.
Monsieur d'Apreval called her back.
“I beg your pardon, madame, but we came in to know whether you could
sell us two glasses of milk.”
She was grumbling when she reappeared in the door, after putting down
her pails.
“I don't sell milk,” she replied.
“We are very thirsty,” he said, “and madame is very tired. Can we not
get something to drink?”
The peasant woman gave them an uneasy and cunning glance and then she
made up her mind.
“As you are here, I will give you some,” she said, going into the house,
and almost immediately the child came out and brought two chairs, which
she placed under an apple tree, and then the mother, in turn, brought
out two bowls of foaming milk, which she gave to the visitors. She did
not return to the house, however, but remained standing near them, as if
to watch them and to find out for what purpose they had come there.
“You have come from Fecamp?” she said.
“Yes,” Monsieur d'Apreval replied, “we are staying at Fecamp for the
summer.”
And then, after a short silence, he continued:
“Have you any fowls you could sell us every week?”
The woman hesitated for a moment and then replied:
“Yes, I think I have. I suppose you want young ones?”
“Yes, of course.”
“'What do you pay for them in the market?”
D'Apreval, who had not the least idea, turned to his companion:
“What are you paying for poultry in Fecamp, my dear lady?”
“Four francs and four francs fifty centimes,” she said, her eyes full of
tears, while the farmer's wife, who was looking at her askance, asked in
much surprise:
“Is the lady ill, as she is crying?”
He did not know what to say, and replied with some hesitation:
“No—no—but she lost her watch as we came along, a very handsome watch,
and that troubles her. If anybody should find it, please let us know.”
Mother Benedict did not reply, as she thought it a very equivocal sort
of answer, but suddenly she exclaimed:
“Oh, here is my husband!”
She was the only one who had seen him, as she was facing the gate.
D'Apreval started and Madame de Cadour nearly fell as she turned round
suddenly on her chair.
A man bent nearly double, and out of breath, stood there, ten-yards from
them, dragging a cow at the end of a rope. Without taking any notice of
the visitors, he said:
“Confound it! What a brute!”
And he went past them and disappeared in the cow house.
Her tears had dried quickly as she sat there startled, without a word
and with the one thought in her mind, that this was her son, and
D'Apreval, whom the same thought had struck very unpleasantly, said in
an agitated voice:
“Is this Monsieur Benedict?”
“Who told you his name?” the wife asked, still rather suspiciously.
“The blacksmith at the corner of the highroad,” he replied, and then
they were all silent, with their eyes fixed on the door of the cow
house, which formed a sort of black hole in the wall of the building.
Nothing could be seen inside, but they heard a vague noise, movements
and footsteps and the sound of hoofs, which were deadened by the straw
on the floor, and soon the man reappeared in the door, wiping his
forehead, and came toward the house with long, slow strides. He passed
the strangers without seeming to notice them and said to his wife:
“Go and draw me a jug of cider; I am very thirsty.”
Then he went back into the house, while his wife went into the cellar
and left the two Parisians alone.
“Let us go, let us go, Henri,” Madame de Cadour said, nearly distracted
with grief, and so d'Apreval took her by the arm, helped her to rise,
and sustaining her with all his strength, for he felt that she was
nearly fainting, he led her out, after throwing five francs on one of
the chairs.
As soon as they were outside the gate, she began to sob and said,
shaking with grief:
“Oh! oh! is that what you have made of him?”
He was very pale and replied coldly:
“I did what I could. His farm is worth eighty thousand francs, and that
is more than most of the sons of the middle classes have.”
They returned slowly, without speaking a word. She was still crying; the
tears ran down her cheeks continually for a time, but by degrees they
stopped, and they went back to Fecamp, where they found Monsieur de
Cadour waiting dinner for them. As soon as he saw them, he began to
laugh and exclaimed:
“So my wife has had a sunstroke, and I am very glad of it. I really
think she has lost her head for some time past!”
Neither of them replied, and when the husband asked them, rubbing his
hands:
“Well, I hope that, at least, you have had a pleasant walk?”
Monsieur d'Apreval replied:
“A delightful walk, I assure you; perfectly delightful.”
THE MAISON TELLIER
They went there every evening about eleven o'clock, just as they would
go to the club. Six or eight of them; always the same set, not fast men,
but respectable tradesmen, and young men in government or some other
employ, and they would drink their Chartreuse, and laugh with the girls,
or else talk seriously with Madame Tellier, whom everybody respected,
and then they would go home at twelve o'clock! The younger men would
sometimes stay later.
It was a small, comfortable house painted yellow, at the corner of a
street behind Saint Etienne's Church, and from the windows one could see
the docks full of ships being unloaded, the big salt marsh, and, rising
beyond it, the Virgin's Hill with its old gray chapel.
Madame Tellier, who came of a respectable family of peasant proprietors
in the Department of the Eure, had taken up her profession, just as she
would have become a milliner or dressmaker. The prejudice which is so
violent and deeply rooted in large towns, does not exist in the country
places in Normandy. The peasant says:
“It is a paying-business,” and he sends his daughter to keep an
establishment of this character just as he would send her to keep a
girls' school.
She had inherited the house from an old uncle, to whom it had belonged.
Monsieur and Madame Tellier, who had formerly been innkeepers near
Yvetot, had immediately sold their house, as they thought that the
business at Fecamp was more profitable, and they arrived one fine
morning to assume the direction of the enterprise, which was declining
on account of the absence of the proprietors. They were good people
enough in their way, and soon made themselves liked by their staff and
their neighbors.
Monsieur died of apoplexy two years later, for as the new place kept him
in idleness and without any exercise, he had grown excessively stout,
and his health had suffered. Since she had been a widow, all the
frequenters of the establishment made much of her; but people said that,
personally, she was quite virtuous, and even the girls in the house
could not discover anything against her. She was tall, stout and
affable, and her complexion, which had become pale in the dimness of her
house, the shutters of which were scarcely ever opened, shone as if it
had been varnished. She had a fringe of curly false hair, which gave her
a juvenile look, that contrasted strongly with the ripeness of her
figure. She was always smiling and cheerful, and was fond of a joke, but
there was a shade of reserve about her, which her occupation had not
quite made her lose. Coarse words always shocked her, and when any young
fellow who had been badly brought up called her establishment a hard
name, she was angry and disgusted.
In a word, she had a refined mind, and although she treated her women as
friends, yet she very frequently used to say that “she and they were not
made of the same stuff.”
Sometimes during the week she would hire a carriage and take some of her
girls into the country, where they used to enjoy themselves on the grass
by the side of the little river. They were like a lot of girls let out
from school, and would run races and play childish games. They had a
cold dinner on the grass, and drank cider, and went home at night with a
delicious feeling of fatigue, and in the carriage they kissed Madame'
Tellier as their kind mother, who was full of goodness and complaisance.
The house had two entrances. At the corner there was a sort of tap-room,
which sailors and the lower orders frequented at night, and she had two
girls whose special duty it was to wait on them with the assistance of
Frederic, a short, light-haired, beardless fellow, as strong as a horse.
They set the half bottles of wine and the jugs of beer on the shaky
marble tables before the customers, and then urged the men to drink.
The three other girls—there were only five of them—formed a kind of
aristocracy, and they remained with the company on the first floor,
unless they were wanted downstairs and there was nobody on the first
floor. The salon de Jupiter, where the tradesmen used to meet, was
papered in blue, and embellished with a large drawing representing Leda
and the swan. The room was reached by a winding staircase, through a
narrow door opening on the street, and above this door a lantern
inclosed in wire, such as one still sees in some towns, at the foot of
the shrine of some saint, burned all night long.
The house, which was old and damp, smelled slightly of mildew. At times
there was an odor of eau de Cologne in the passages, or sometimes from a
half-open door downstairs the noisy mirth of the common men sitting and
drinking rose to the first floor, much to the disgust of the gentlemen
who were there. Madame Tellier, who was on friendly terms with her
customers, did not leave the room, and took much interest in what was
going on in the town, and they regularly told her all the news. Her
serious conversation was a change from the ceaseless chatter of the
three women; it was a rest from the obscene jokes of those stout
individuals who every evening indulged in the commonplace debauchery of
drinking a glass of liqueur in company with common women.
The names of the girls on the first floor were Fernande, Raphaele, and
Rosa, the Jade. As the staff was limited, madame had endeavored that
each member of it should be a pattern, an epitome of the feminine type,
so that every customer might find as nearly as possible the realization
of his ideal. Fernande represented the handsome blonde; she was very
tall, rather fat, and lazy; a country girl, who could not get rid of her
freckles, and whose short, light, almost colorless, tow-like hair, like
combed-out hemp, barely covered her head.
Raphaele, who came from Marseilles, played the indispensable part of the
handsome Jewess, and was thin, with high cheekbones, which were covered
with rouge, and black hair covered with pomatum, which curled on her
forehead. Her eyes would have been handsome, if the right one had not
had a speck in it. Her Roman nose came down over a square jaw, where two
false upper teeth contrasted strangely with the bad color of the rest.
Rosa was a little roll of fat, nearly all body, with very short legs,
and from morning till night she sang songs, which were alternately
risque or sentimental, in a harsh voice; told silly, interminable tales,
and only stopped talking in order to eat, and left off eating in order
to talk; she was never still, and was active as a squirrel, in spite of
her embonpoint and her short legs; her laugh, which was a torrent of
shrill cries, resounded here and there, ceaselessly, in a bedroom, in
the loft, in the cafe, everywhere, and all about nothing.
The two women on the ground floor, Lodise, who was nicknamed La Cocotte,
and Flora, whom they called Balancoise, because she limped a little, the
former always dressed as the Goddess of Liberty, with a tri-colored
sash, and the other as a Spanish woman, with a string of copper coins in
her carroty hair, which jingled at every uneven step, looked like cooks
dressed up for the carnival. They were like all other women of the lower
orders, neither uglier nor better looking than they usually are.
They looked just like servants at an inn, and were generally called “the
two pumps.”
A jealous peace, which was, however, very rarely disturbed, reigned
among these five women, thanks to Madame Tellier's conciliatory wisdom,
and to her constant good humor, and the establishment, which was the
only one of the kind in the little town, was very much frequented.
Madame Tellier had succeeded in giving it such a respectable appearance,
she was so amiable and obliging to everybody, her good heart was so well
known, that she was treated with a certain amount of consideration. The
regular customers spent money on her, and were delighted when she was
especially friendly toward them, and when they met during the day, they
would say: “Until this evening, you know where,” just as men say: “At
the club, after dinner.” In a word, Madame Tellier's house was somewhere
to go to, and they very rarely missed their daily meetings there.
One evening toward the end of May, the first arrival, Monsieur Poulin,
who was a timber merchant, and had been mayor, found the door shut. The
lantern behind the grating was not alight; there was not a sound in the
house; everything seemed dead. He knocked, gently at first, but then
more loudly, but nobody answered the door. Then he went slowly up the
street, and when he got to the market place he met Monsieur Duvert, the
gunmaker, who was going to the same place, so they went back together,
but did not meet with any better success. But suddenly they heard a loud
noise, close to them, and on going round the house, they saw a number of
English and French sailors, who were hammering at the closed shutters of
the taproom with their fists.
The two tradesmen immediately made their escape, but a low “Pst!”
stopped them; it was Monsieur Tournevau, the fish curer, who had
recognized them, and was trying to attract their attention. They told
him what had happened, and he was all the more annoyed, as he was a
married man and father of a family, and only went on Saturdays. That was
his regular evening, and now he should be deprived of this dissipation
for the whole week.
The three men went as far as the quay together, and on the way they met
young Monsieur Philippe, the banker's son, who frequented the place
regularly, and Monsieur Pinipesse, the collector, and they all returned
to the Rue aux Juifs together, to make a last attempt. But the
exasperated sailors were besieging the house, throwing stones at the
shutters, and shouting, and the five first-floor customers went away as
quickly as possible, and walked aimlessly about the streets.
Presently they met Monsieur Dupuis, the insurance agent, and then
Monsieur Vasse, the Judge of the Tribunal of Commerce, and they took a
long walk, going to the pier first of all, where they sat down in a row
on the granite parapet and watched the rising tide, and when the
promenaders had sat there for some time, Monsieur Tournevau said:
“This is not very amusing!”
“Decidedly not,” Monsieur Pinipesse replied, and they started off to
walk again.
After going through the street alongside the hill, they returned over
the wooden bridge which crosses the Retenue, passed close to the
railway, and came out again on the market place, when, suddenly, a
quarrel arose between Monsieur Pinipesse, the collector, and Monsieur
Tournevau about an edible mushroom which one of them declared he had
found in the neighborhood.
As they were out of temper already from having nothing to do, they would
very probably have come to blows, if the others had not interfered.
Monsieur Pinipesse went off furious, and soon another altercation arose
between the ex-mayor, Monsieur Poulin, and Monsieur Dupuis, the
insurance agent, on the subject of the tax collector's salary and the
profits which he might make. Insulting remarks were freely passing
between them, when a torrent of formidable cries was heard, and the body
of sailors, who were tired of waiting so long outside a closed house,
came into the square. They were walking arm in arm, two and two, and
formed a long procession, and were shouting furiously. The townsmen hid
themselves in a doorway, and the yelling crew disappeared in the
direction of the abbey. For a long time they still heard the noise,
which diminished like a storm in the distance, and then silence was
restored. Monsieur Poulin and Monsieur Dupuis, who were angry with each
other, went in different directions, without wishing each other good-by.
The other four set off again, and instinctively went in the direction of
Madame Tellier's establishment, which was still closed, silent,
impenetrable. A quiet, but obstinate drunken man was knocking at the
door of the lower room, antd then stopped and called Frederic, in a low
voice, but finding that he got no answer, he sat down on the doorstep,
and waited the course of events.
The others were just going to retire, when the noisy band of sailors
reappeared at the end of the street. The French sailors were shouting
the “Marseillaise,” and the Englishmen “Rule Britannia.” There was a
general lurching against the wall, and then the drunken fellows went on
their way toward the quay, where a fight broke out between the two
nations, in the course of which an Englishman had his arm broken and a
Frenchman his nose split.
The drunken man who had waited outside the door, was crying by that
time, as drunken men and children cry when they are vexed, and the
others went away. By degrees, calm was restored in the noisy town; here
and there, at moments, the distant sound of voices could be heard, and
then died away in the distance.
One man only was still wandering about, Monsieur Tournevau, the fish
curer, who was annoyed at having to wait until the following Saturday,
and he hoped something would turn up, he did not know what; but he was
exasperated at the police for thus allowing an establishment of such
public utility, which they had under their control, to be closed.
He went back to it and examined the walls, trying to find out some
reason, and on the shutter he saw a notice stuck up. He struck a wax
match and read the following, in a large, uneven hand: “Closed on
account of the Confirmation.”
Then he went away, as he saw it was useless to remain, and left the
drunken man lying on the pavement fast asleep, outside that inhospitable
door.
The next day, all the regular customers, one after the other, found some
reason for going through the street, with a bundle of papers under their
arm to keep them in countenance, and with a furtive glance they all read
that mysterious notice:
“Closed on account of the Confirmation.”
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