1807. _Miseries of the Country._ 'While on a visit to the hundreds of

Essex, being under the necessity of getting dead drunk every day to save your life.' Et propter vitam vivendi perdere causas.... The hundreds of Essex, it appears from the print, which represents a bacchanalian sporting revel, were doubtless attractive to fox-hunters; but the hospitalities exercised therein were rather excessive. The usual accompaniments of a drunken bout of the period are set forth with Rowlandson's graphic skill; an old toper is draining a punch-bowl and capsizing himself simultaneously; an ambitious young reveller is tipsily trying to mount the table, and over-balancing himself in the attempt; a stout divine is indisposed in a corner; heavy drinkers laid low are on the floor, whence they are dragged off by their heels, and carried to bed in an incapable and collapsed condition. Furniture is knocked over, and chimney ornaments sent to grief. It is an anniversary meeting of choice spirits. _October 5, 1807._ _A Mistake at Newmarket, or Sport and Piety._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--A good pious old soul, wearing a hood, red cloak, clean apron, and pattens, and carrying Wesley's hymns in her hand, is interrogating certain sporting characters, who are lounging at the door of the _Ram Inn_. 'Pray, young man,' she enquires of a smart young jockey, 'are there any _meetings_ in this town?' To which the jockey replies, 'Yes, ma'am, two a year--Spring and October!' 1807(?) _Englishman at Paris._ H. Bunbury invt., Rowlandson sculp.--Our old friend John Bull is shown, with his travelling accompaniments, philosophically pursuing his quiet way in the land of the 'Monsieurs.' He is the centre of curiosity, though, according to the artist's picture, he is the least remarkable object in the group. A corpulent friar is observing the well-rounded person of the stranger with an appreciative eye; while a lean cook, in wooden shoes, is staring with astonishment at the goodly proportions of the Englishman. A French _petit-maître_ is driving a ramshackle contrivance, and his queerly clad servant is perched on the springs behind. A female luggage porter is plodding along, and an adventitious shower, directed from a balcony above, is descending on the umbrella of a dandified pedestrian, daintily mincing along on tiptoe, who, at first glance, might be taken for a live Marquis, if, on inspection, his apron and the professional implements peeping out of his coat-tail, did not proclaim him a barber. John Bull's substantially built dog is eyeing a sniffing French hound with threatening suspicion. [Illustration: ENGLISHMAN AT PARIS.] 1807(?) _Symptoms of Restiveness._ H. Bunbury del., Rowlandson sculp.--Henry Bunbury, it will be observed, was remarkably fond of drawing disasters in the saddle; his brother, the respected Sir Charles Bunbury, was, for many years, president of the Jockey Club, in which difficult position he rigorously upheld the integrity of the turf; and there is no doubt that the originator of 'Geoffrey Gambado, Esq.,' and of those invaluable precepts on equitation published and illustrated as alleged by the eminent _Riding Master of the Horse and Grand Equerry to the Doge of Venice_ (about the only potentate who could not find a turnpike-road within his capital), must have had 'a good eye for a horse.' The Symptoms of Restiveness are of a somewhat marked and unmistakable character: while one sportsman's steed is kneeling down on his forelegs, and turning the huntsman heels over head, another cavalier's animal is standing rigidly on his forelegs, and perseveringly attempting to dislodge his mount by kicking out wildly behind. A third rider is no less fortunate in his hack, which has 'no mouth,' and is moreover a 'bolter'; the animal is steadily plunging through everything in its way, apparently unconscious of the desperate efforts his master is making to hold him in. An old woman, with her barrow and its contents, are tumbled over, without attracting the attention of the wrong-headed brute, whose mind is absorbed in his own private speculations. [Illustration: SYMPTOMS OF RESTIVENESS.] 1807 (?) _A Calf's Pluck._ Designed by H. Bunbury. Etched by T. Rowlandson. [Illustration: A CALF'S PLUCK.] 1807 (?) _Rusty Bacon._ Designed by H. Bunbury. Etched by T. Rowlandson. [Illustration: RUSTY BACON.] 1807 (?) _A Tour to the Lakes._-- Whoe'er has travell'd life's dull round, Through all its various paths hath been, Must oft have wondered to have found His warmest welcome at an Inn. A clerical traveller has arrived, late at night, at an hostel; a pretty chamber-maid is showing the reverend visitor to his room, bearing a lighted candle, a warming-pan, and the saddle-bags of the guest, who appears well pleased with his conductress, and is imparting his admiration. As it appears that this gentleman is inclined to be less respectable than his venerated calling should suggest, it is less scandalising to observe that various practical jokes of a rough character are besetting his path; consequently, it is highly probable that he will receive an active moral lesson before he reaches his chamber. _November 9, 1807._ _Thomas Simmons, drawn from Life by Mr. Angelo._ Published by T. Rowlandson, 1 James Street, Adelphi. 'The horrid and inhuman murderer of Mrs. Hammerstone and Mrs. Warner at the house of Mr. Boreham, a Quaker at Hoddesdon, in Herts, on Tuesday evening, October 20, 1807.'--The barbarous murderer does not rejoice in a very formidable exterior. His weakly person has been sketched by the hand of Henry Angelo, the well-known fencing-master, a firm friend of Rowlandson through life. His amusing _Memoirs_ have supplied us with many circumstances relating to the caricaturist. It appears that Angelo, Bannister, and Rowlandson were schoolfellows at an early period of life, and they were all as youths excessively fond of their pencils; although it was reserved for Rowlandson alone to attain proficiency in the fine arts. Angelo, like George Selwyn, Colonel Hanger, and some few notorieties, was fond of attending executions, visiting jails, and similar lugubrious exhibitions. Among his visits to prisons he encountered some curious characters. Thomas Simmons, the subject of the present plate, was one of the unfortunates with whom he became acquainted on one of these eccentric excursions. From the sketch, Thomas Simmons appears a mere dwarf of a man, a harmless-looking and apparently half-witted individual, realising the traditional idea of _Simple Simon_. This murderer has heavy manacles round his puny limbs. Groups of miserable prisoners, and hard-featured jailors are in the rear, and the heavy iron doors of Newgate afford an appropriate background. _November 10, 1807._ _Directions to Footmen._ Rowlandson del. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside (273).--'Take off the largest dishes, and set them on with one hand, to show the ladies your vigour and strength of back, but always do it between two ladies, that if the dish happens to slip, the soup or sauce may fall on their clothes, and not daub the floor; by this practice, two of our brethren, my worthy friends, got considerable fortunes.'--A stalwart awkward-looking yokel, in a showy livery, is carrying out these useful directions to the letter. While grinning at his horrified mistress, he is upsetting a tureen held loosely in his right hand, over a handsome damsel, and is flooding the table-cloth, to the horror of the company, and the delight of a poodle, which is revelling in the stream. In the clumsy footman's left hand is held a dish, from which he is calmly allowing the joint, gravy, &c., to glide over the back of another dog who is less pleased than his companion. _November 10, 1807._ _John Bull making Observations on the Coast._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The head of George the Third, as the sun, is throwing its brilliant rays across the Channel, and shining on the British Fleet which lines the waters. The head of Napoleon Buonaparte, with his cocked hat and feather, is represented as a comet with a fiery train, which is making vicious exertions to dash itself across the orb of day. John Bull has planted his telescope on the shores of the Channel, and his eye is following the course of the erratic meteor: 'Ay, ay, Master Comet, you may attempt your peri-heliums, or your devil-heliums for what I care, but take the word of an old man, you'll never reach the sun, depend upon it.' _November 20, 1807._ _A Couple of Antiquities._ Published by R. Ackermann. _November 20, 1807._ _My Aunt and My Uncle._ Published by R. Ackermann. _November 21, 1807._ _The Dog and the Devil._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The interior of a conjurer's chamber, decorated with the usual paraphernalia of bats, stuffed crocodiles, &c. The empiric wears his learned robes and fur cap; in the centre of a magic circle stands the pretended enchanter's assistant, dressed in a bullock's hide, with the horns and tail left on, to personate the Father of Evil; a butcher, in his working dress, has called to consult the oracle concerning a missing sheep; he has brought his bull-dog with him, unobserved by the demonstrator, and the animal, true to his instincts, has pinned the mock demon-bull by the nose; 'the pretended devil roar'd most tremendously; but the dog kept a firm hold. The conjurer, rising in a passion, exclaimed, "You scoundrel, take off your dog!" The butcher, however, perceiving the cheat, cried out, "Not I, doctor, I know he is of as good a breed as ever bolted, so let 'em fight fair; if you are not afraid of your devil, I am not afraid of my dog; so dog against devil for what sum you please!"' The fictitious demon is in bad case. 1807 (?). _More Miseries, or the Bottom of Mr. Figg's Old Whiskey broke through._--A serio-comic scene that befel the 'grocer's wife at Norwich, owing to the bottom of Mr. Figg's whiskey breaking through.' The flooring of a vehicle something like a phaeton has proved too slight for a ponderous occupant: the lady's ample proportions are framed in the chaise, to the alarm of her husband, who is seizing the prancing horse. Certain gazers, hugely delighted, are hastening up not to lose the spectacle of the lady's awkward situation. 1807 (?). _The Man of Feeling._--The scene takes place in a sky-parlour, and the principal performer is a son of the Church. 1807 (?). _Miseries of Bathing._ 'After bathing in the river, on returning to the bank for your clothes, finding that a passing thief has taken a sudden fancy to the cut of every article of your dress.' 1807 (?). _The Pleasures of Human Life._ By Hilari Benevolus & Co. Published by Longmans, 1807. Crown 8vo. _Pleasures of Human Life_, in a dozen dissertations, interspersed with various anecdotes, _Pleasures of Fashion_, _Fashionable People_, _Market of Love_, _Greeks_, _Literature_, _Hints to Print Collectors_, _Puffing_, etc., coloured by Rowlandson. FOOTNOTE: [6] Francisco Caracci, and General Guise's collection (_Somerset-House Gazette_), from a note to Mr. Ephraim Hardcastle (Editor):--'Francisco Caracci was the younger brother of Augustino and Annibale; and Antonio, called from his deformity Il Gobbo, was the natural son of Augustino. These were the individuals who formed that celebrated family of painters. The father of Ludovico Caracci was a butcher (_era macelago_), and the father of Annibale and Augustino a tailor. Annibale resolved to mortify the pride of Ludovico, who despised him on account of his frequently reminding him of their low origin. He therefore privately painted the portraits of the Caracci, as large as life, in a butcher's shop, and showed his picture for the first time to Ludovico, when in company with Cardinal Farnese. It is now in the Guise collection, at Christ Church College, Oxford. Annibale is the butcher weighing the meat, which a soldier (Ludovico) is purchasing. Augustino stands near them. Antonio is lifting down a carcase, which conceals his deformity; and the old woman represents their mother. General Guise is said to have given 1,100_l._ for this picture, which was purchased for him at Venice. Talking of Oxford, did you ever see this collection? If the old General Guise had no more taste for fighting than for painting, I would have met him and his legions with wooden cannon. Yet I have heard certain _bigwigs_ of the University crack up the Guise Gallery! They are nice social fellows at Christ Church for all this, and men of taste; a conversation on painting is brought to table in hall there, like the wine--devilishly well iced.' 1808. SOCIAL AND GENERAL CARICATURES. _January, 1808._ _The Discovery._ _January, 1808._ _Wild Irish, or Paddy from Cork with his Coat Buttoned Behind._ _February 16, 1808._ _Scenes at Brighton, or the Miseries of Human Life._ _Plate 3._ 'A Blackleg detected secreting cards &c., after drawing upon your purse on former occasions, is the properest of men to run the gauntlet, as he but too often produces substantial Miseries for Human Life.' _Plate 4._ 'Suffering under the last symptoms of a dangerous malady, you naturally hope relief from medical skill and practice; but flying periwigs, brandished canes, and clysters, the fear of random cuffs, &c., intrude and produce a climax in the Miseries of Human Life.' _March 1, 1808._ _Miseries of High Life._--'Briskly stooping to pick up a lady's fan, at the same moment when two other gentlemen are doing the same thing, and so making a cannon with your head against both of theirs, and this without being the happy man after all.' [Illustration: MISERIES OF HIGH LIFE.] _March 1, 1808._ _The Green Dragon._ Rowlandson del. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--A clerical-looking and corpulent reprobate is receiving the upbraidings of his infuriated spouse, to whom the artist has playfully given some resemblance to a veritable dragon, with teeth, claws, and venom. The position of affairs is further explained by a spirited representation of 'Socrates and Zantippe,' which hangs on the wall. A pretty servant-maid, who is making a somewhat hasty exit, is supposed to have aroused the jealousy of the virago, whose vials of wrath have brought her stout helpmate to a state of stupefaction and terror. The picture is accompanied by the lines of Gay, from the _Beggars' Opera_:-- With rage I redden like scarlet, that my dear inconstant varlet, Stark blind to my charms, is lost in the arms of that jilt, that inveigling harlot! _March 1, 1808._ _Description of a Boxing Match._ June 9, 1806. Published by T. Rowlandson, 1 James Street, Adelphi. _April 1, 1808._ _Soldiers on a March._ 'To pack up her tatters and follow the drum.' Designed and published by T. Rowlandson, 1 James Street, Adelphi.--The progress of the regiment is much impeded by camp-followers. A stream happening to cross the route, the marching party are wading through; the soldiers bearing in addition to their knapsack the fairer burden of a wife, and in some cases two infants, with kettles, gridirons, and other culinary appliances, the latter swinging on the end of their muskets. The officer commanding the party has the advantage of securing a mount on the plump shoulders of a pretty damsel, whose skirts are tucked up as a preparation towards wading across the water, with the feathered hero on her back. _May 12, 1808._ _The Consultation, or Last Hope._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--'So when the Doctors shake their heads, and bid their patient think of Heaven--all's over, good night!' From the picture, which rejoices in this comforting quotation, we judge the unfortunate invalid, introduced by the artist as the principal figure in this humorous plate, is in a bad case; his suffering face expresses all the forlorn terrors of his extreme situation, which seems tolerably hopeless, since he is attended by no less than ten learned practitioners, and a sick-nurse; it is hard if among them they cannot settle their patient's condition. The ten are by no means troubling themselves about their client all at once: it is sufficient that a brace of the brethren are feeling each a pulse, which operation does not seem to afford them much enlightenment, since one is consulting his chronometer, and the other is seeking inspiration from the head of his gold-topped stick. Their colleagues are more agreeably engaged in fortifying themselves for their arduous professional duties by attending manfully to the refreshment department. The gouty patient has evidently been a man of substance; over his mantel hangs a map of 'Rotten Boroughs,--Camelford, Devon, &c.' _May 21, 1808._ _Volunteer Wit, or not Enough for a Prime._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg (227).--A party of Volunteer officers are gathered round the mahogany of their entertainer, who, it seems, is a notorious screw; the host is offering to fill the wine-glasses of the mess, but the dimensions of the glasses are somewhat miniature for bumper toasts. A challenge is given from the chair: 'Come, gentlemen-volunteers, to the right and left--Charge if you please to the King!' The vice-chair is winning the sympathies of the rest, and extracting a grin all round, by standing up, spectacles on nose, and responding: 'I should be very happy to obey your orders, Colonel, but really your glasses are so small, that, dash me if there's enough for a prime!' The Colonel's miserly disposition is hinted by the various papers thrown about, on the 'Current prices of Port wine,' and such maxims as 'A penny saved is twopence got'; with a statement pinned to the wall, 'How to get rich,' 'Pinch, squeeze, gripe, snatch, &c.' 1808 (?). _The Anatomy of Melancholy._ ''Tis a misery to be born, a pain to live, a trouble to die.'--A mixed scene of suffering and indifference. Propped up in a pillowed arm-chair, before the fire, is a melancholy invalid, old, decrepit, and ill-favoured. By his side is a list of 'Remedies against discontents,' 'Cure of jealousy,' &c.; on the mantel is an array of doctor's bottles, and a hatchment,--_groans, griefs, sadness_,--forms a cheerful adornment for the chimneypiece. Behind the sufferer, whose last hour, it seems, is approaching--since Death has thrust his head, arm, and hour-glass through a window above his head--is seated a blooming young damsel, decked out in all the attractiveness of an evening toilette; planted at a table by her side is a dandified admirer; before them a dessert is arranged, and decanters of wine are ready to hand. The nonchalant pair are pledging one another amorously in bumpers, while the spirit of the founder of the feast is departing. A painting of Democritus, his face wearing an expression of grief on one side, and laughter on the other, explains the transitory nature of sorrow, and the key of the situation is further offered by certain lines inscribed on a paper under the lady's hand: 'Come what may, the cat will mew, the dog will have his day.' _May 21, 1808._ _The Mother's Hope._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside. (No. 228.)--The Mothers Hope is a pretty juvenile termagant, a Turk of the most irreclaimable order. The young rebel is dancing about in a fine rage, scattering his playthings, and 'making a bobbery' which is setting the entire house by the ears. The screams of the intractable elder are imitated by an infant in arms, and a canary is adding its shrill pipings to the general squall, after the nature of little warblers. [Illustration: THE MOTHER'S HOPE.] The wilful child is making a general statement of refractory resolutions:--'I don't like dolls--I don't like canary birds--I hate battledore and shuttlecock--I like drums and trumpets--I won't go to school--I will stay at home--I will have my own way in everything!' The horrified grandmother is growing prophetic on the strength of this irreconcilable prodigy: 'Bless the Baby--what an aspiring spirit--if he goes on in this way he will be a second Buonaparte!' _June 4, 1808._ _The Sweet Little Girl that I Love._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg. (167.)--A long military gentleman, wearing spectacles, a pigtail, and a powdered wig and whiskers, in the course of his perambulations has come across a quaint round little body, as broad as she is long, and perched on pattens: the hero is stooping low to salute the lips of the dwarfed lady. The picture is designed as a parody upon the lines:-- My friends all declare that my time is misspent, While in rural contentment I rove: I ask no more wealth than Dame Fortune has sent, And the sweet little girl that I love. The rose on her cheek's my delight: She's soft as the down--the down of the dove. No lily was ever so fair As the sweet little girl that I love. _June 4, 1808._ _Odd Fellows from Downing Street, complaining to John Bull._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside (168).--John Bull, in his best clothes, and standing in the vicinity of the Treasury, is receiving a deputation, the members of which, as far as appearance goes, are singularly fitted for the order of Odd-fellows. The object of their interview is simply an appeal to the sympathies of the National Prototype: 'You must know, Mr. Bull, we are a society of Odd Fellows who had a Lodge in Downing Street, and were robb'd of our cash and accounts, notwithstanding we met at the King's Head, and so near the Treasury too! Is not it very hard? However, we have left Downing Street entirely.' John Bull, who, with his hand beneath his coat-tails, is ruminating over other more weighty matters applying to his own case, and peering through his huge spectacles, returns in reply: 'All I have to say, my good friends, is this--I am very sorry for you, but I must own I am of opinion if some more _Odd Fellows_ in Downing Street were to quit their situations it would be very much to my advantage!' _June 20, 1808._ _A Snug Cabin, or Port Admiral._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--Very different cheer to the _Volunteer Prime_, is found on board the ship of the port-admiral. That worthy personage is drawn entertaining his naval colleagues, admirals, commodores, and captains, in his state cabin, with the best of cheer; baskets of prime vintage from the Isles of the Madeira, are ready to the nimble steward's hand, and the goodly flasks are uncorked in a twinkling. The jorums on the mahogany are capacious, and the glasses, which are freely emptied, would serve as goblets for more than half-pint bumpers; however, in spite of the hilarity, and the liberal circulation of the decanters, decorum is preserved, and the naval commanders are comporting themselves like 'fine old English gentlemen,' while the toast goes round:-- Come Hurricane, Drink your Wine. Here's to the wind that blows, The ship that goes, And the lass that loves a sailor. [Illustration: A SNUG CABIN, OR PORT ADMIRAL.] _June 30, 1808._ _Accommodation, or Lodgings to Let at Portsmouth._ Published by T. Tegg. (219.)--Certain smartly-rigged tars have just come on shore, evidently after a handsome haul in the way of prize-money, as the spruceness of their turn-out evinces. A highly presentable 'salt' has his wife in tow; the lady has evidently taken a share of his good fortune, being dressed in the height of the fashion, with ear-rings, necklets, and chains, heavy enough for cables, to which are suspended miniatures, seals, and watches. The happy pair are evidently about to set up housekeeping, and an advertisement-board has just arrested their attention, conveying the information, 'Lodgings for Single Men and their Wives,' with an invitation to ring the bell. 'Why, Nan,' exclaims the tar to his partner, 'this is the very berth we have been so long looking after!' _June 30, 1808._ _The Welsh Sailor's Mistake, or Tars in Conversation._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside. (220.)--The artist has assumed a little poetic licence to perpetrate a jokelet of a very harmless order. Groups of sailors are seated on the forecastle, some perched on coils of rope, others on sea chests; a British tar, on a barrel, with a canister of 'real Oronooko' by his side, is spinning a yarn to his messmates; he has arrived at the exciting incident of his narrative:--'and so then, do you see, David, we sprung a leak!' when his Welsh messmate, who cannot resist this allusion to a reputed national delicacy, rather irrationally interrupts him: 'Cot pless us--and save us--did you? and a ferry coot fetchitable it is; I should have liked to have had a pit with you.' _October 25, 1808._ _A Bill of Fare for Bond Street Epicures._ Woodward del., engraved by T. Rowlandson. Published by T. Tegg. _November 1, 1808._ _Wonderfully Mended; shouldn't have known you again._ One of the series bearing Rowlandson's name, and published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street.--The scene represents the consulting room of some eminent quack of the day, who, dressed in his morning-gown and slippers, with glasses on nose, is receiving his decrepit and melancholy patients. The comforting assurance given by the practitioner to his patients is, it appears, totally without foundation; all his clients, judging from their condition, being in a fair way to supplement the Bills of Mortality. _November 1, 1808._ _The Last Shift._ Published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street.--Interior of a pawnbroker's shop; two St. Giles's demireps are shown in the act of raising a loan to replenish their gin bottle, at the expense of their wardrobe. _November 1, 1808._ _Breaking Cover._ Published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street.--A fox-hunting party is passing through a village; one of the Nimrods has seemingly formed an attachment for a fair neighbour: standing on the back and saddle of his horse, he has contrived to raise himself to the level of the lady's casement, and she is leaning out of window, and rewarding his gallantry with a tender embrace; meanwhile her husband in his nightcap, opening the shutter below, is securing a prospect of the proceeding, which has thrown an expression of idiotic consternation over his simple features. _November 1, 1808._ _Get Money._--One of a series engraved in rough facsimile of Rowlandson's original drawings, and bearing an imitation of his autograph in the corner; published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street. Below the print appear the following lines:-- Get Money, Money still, And then let Virtue follow if she will. Three conventional types of Israelites are indicated standing in Duke's Place, the resort of Jewish clothesmen, eagerly canvassing the above doctrine, and carrying out its first injunction. [Illustration: DOCTOR GALLIPOT.] _November 1, 1808._ _Doctor Gallipot placing his Fortune at the feet of his Mistress._ Published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street. Throw physic to the dogs. Doctor Gallipot, a brandy-faced empiric, who is dressed in the height of the 'Frenchified' fashion, the better to support his quackeries, is laying the implements of his profession, as his fortune, at the feet of a slightly theatrical looking lady, whose figure is delineated with Rowlandson's accustomed grace and spirit. _November 1, 1808._ _Rum Characters in a Shrubbery._ Published by Reeve and Jones, 7 Vere Street.--Four demireps, of dissipated appearance and varied characteristics, are regaling themselves on Booth's gin at a public bar or _Rum Shrubbery_. _About 1808._ _Bartholomew's Fair._ Nixon del., Rowlandson sculp.--The fun of the Fair is represented in full swing, and the humours of the scenes displayed on all sides are seized and hit off with the usual felicity of both artists. Judging from the caricature, the abolition of fairs in the City must have been a boon to public order and morality. The noise, disorder, and misrule of the festivity are taking place outside the hospital. Boat-swings are revolving, a few of the swings are getting into difficulties, upsetting, or the bottoms coming out, while some of the swingers find themselves indisposed from the motion. There are wandering sellers of sweets, pastry, and such things as were devoured at _fairings_, boys with links, for it is late, and dusk; booths for refreshments, where customers are eating hot cakes cooked on the spot. There are drinking stalls where tipplers are taking too much; as is illustrated in the person of a reveller who, finding himself overcome with liquor, has laid down in the gutter to take a little rest, an opportunity not lost sight of by the light-fingered gentry who have come for business; the toper's watch, purse, hat, and other portable property are swiftly transferred. There are booths for dancing, and there are merrymakers who are managing to dance outside; there are revolving wheel-swings and merry-go-rounds; there is a crowd of very miscellaneous merry-making company, and parties of jolly sailors arriving outside coaches. The harmony of the proceedings is varied by several rows; and, in more than one spot, rings are formed for fair fighting, and both men and women are exhibiting their prowess in the boxing line, or exchanging buffets and scratches. The signs and booths of famous showmen, once the splendours of by-gone fairs, are disposed around; among the spectacles which invited those of our forefathers who 'went to see the shows,' we may notice that Rowlandson has introduced Miles' Menagerie, Saunder's Tragic Theatre, Gingle's Grand Medley, Miss Biffin, Polito's Grand Collection, Punch, &c. ROWLANDSON'S CARICATURES AGAINST BUONAPARTE. As we have already seen, Rowlandson's pencil and graver were enlisted against the Corsican; it would seem that the artist's anti-Napoleonic proclivities ran strongly from this period until the downfall of the Emperor; or else--which is the more reasonable solution--English prejudices against the man whose almost frantic antagonism to this country is now forgiven, if not well-nigh forgotten, demanded an unlimited supply of pictorial satires to stimulate the national hatred, a state of things which pleased both the publishers and the public, and kept the caricaturist occupied, although it is to be regretted that these somewhat imaginative scenes of horror employed his ready skill to the exclusion of those representations of social manners, and the observances of the world around him, whose eccentricities he might have sketched from the life--scenes drawn from a quaint and picturesque generation of which his earlier career has left us such lively pictures, works which alone render his name worthy of his reputation, and which form in themselves an inexhaustible and valuable legacy to his followers. _July 8, 1808._ _The Corsican Tiger at Bay._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--The mighty disturber of the peace of Europe is figured under the form of a savage tiger, with his natural head, and on which he wears the enormous military cocked hat with its long plume--most indispensable accessories in all the caricaturist's portraits of the great 'little Corsican.' The tiger's claws are rending four 'Royal Greyhounds,' which are quite at the mercy of the ferocious conqueror; but a larger and stronger pack of 'Patriotic Greyhounds' are giving tongue, and a fierce charge is being made by some very determined and mischievous-looking hounds who are rushing up to the attack. The _Dutch Frog_, isolated on his own little mudheap, is promising to join the fray: 'It will be my turn to have a slap at him next.' The _Russian Bear_ and the _Austrian Eagle_, are kept in secure bondage by heavy fetters, but the triple-headed bird of prey is looking forward to a fresh onslaught, and prompting his fellow-captive: 'Now _Brother Bruin_, is the time to break our chains.' John Bull, on his own island shores, has come out in the character of a sportsman; he is pointing his piece at the tiger brought to bay, and is singing nursery rhymes for the general encouragement:-- There was a little man, And he had a little gun, And his bullets were made of lead: D--- me, but we'll manage him amongst us! _July 10, 1808._ _Billingsgate at Bayonne, or the Imperial Dinner._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--The members of the Royal family of Spain, decoyed to Bayonne, are sitting down to a very unruly repast, the entire company being at loggerheads. The Queen has risen from table, and in true fishfag style she is raving at her son Ferdinand, who is confronting her: 'Now, you villain, I'll tell you to your face--and before my dear friend Boney--you are no child of the King's--so you may shut up.' At this famous interview the Oueen of Spain, it may be remembered, after upbraiding Ferdinand for his usurpation, actually declared him illegitimate. This argument, according to the print, does not demolish her opponent, who is replying: 'Madam, I know all your tricks, and all the tricks of your Prince of Peace.' The Infants of Spain are encouraging the last speaker: 'Brother, don't mind her, we, the Infants, acknowledge you;' a terrific personage, with the emblem of a Royal crown on the back of his seat, is banging down his fist and demanding: 'Am not I the great Zavallos? will you be silent?' Those on the opposite side are more tranquilly disposed; Charles, who had abdicated by Buonaparte's compulsion in favour of his son Ferdinand, is crying: 'I wish they would let a poor old King play quietly on his fiddle!' while one of the diners is actually paying attention to his meal, and wishing 'they would leave him at peace.' Little Buonaparte in the uniform of a general, as he is usually represented, has risen from a high-raised throne, erected in accordance with his imperial state, at the head of the table; he is affecting to be in a passion at the general discord which he had ingeniously contrived to foster and bring about: 'I'll tell you what, if you make such a riot at my table, I'll be d----d if I don't send you to the Round House!' _July 12, 1808._ _The Corsican Spider in his Web._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The formidable Emperor is represented in a highly successful character as an overgrown spider; his body is formed of 'unbounded Ambition,' which is topped with his own head, he enjoys an amazing capacity for swallowing the surrounding insects, which seem unable to resist being drawn into his toils. The voracious Corsican Spider in the centre of his wide-spread web, is swallowing down a brace of _Spanish Flies_. 'Small Flies Innumerable' are entrapped in strings, and even the largest specimens seem powerless to disentangle themselves; the Austrian, Dutch, Portuguese, Hanoverian, Etrurian, Prussian, Hamburg, Italian, and Venetian Flies are all more or less effectually secured; the 'Pope Fly' is half entrapped, and is expressing a fear of being dragged in. The 'Russian Fly,' of more hostile disposition, has caught his feet in the snare: 'I declare I was half in the web before I made the discovery.' The 'Turkish Fly' is at present free, but its security is uncertain; 'I am afraid it will be my turn next.' Stout John Bull is figured as the 'British Fly'; he is observing the wiles of the 'Corsican Spider' without any anxiety on his own account: 'Ay, you may look, master Spider, but I am not to be caught in your web!' _July 12, 1808._ _The Corsican Nurse soothing the Infants of Spain._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside. (245.)--Buonaparte is acting as nurse to the rival Spanish claimants, still clad in his uniform and boots, with the indispensable cocked hat of Brobdingnagian proportions; the Emperor is lulling the entire royal family to sleep: with one foot he is rocking the 'Imperial Cradle,' which contains 'The good old King and his amiable Consort,' while Don Carlos, in swaddling clothes, with a padlock round his neck, is slumbering upon one of the Corsican's knees; upon the fellow is held Antonio under similar conditions, while the arch-deceiver is rocking a duplicate Imperial Cradle containing the unconscious 'Prince of Asturias,' with his other foot. _July 22, 1808._ _The Beast as described in the Revelations (Chap. 13), resembling Napoleon Buonaparte._ Designed by G. Sauler Farnham. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--The Beast, which has sprung from Corsica, is drawn with seven heads; the names of Austria, Naples, Holland, Denmark, Prussia, and Russia are on the respective crowns; the seventh head, which is of course that of Napoleon, is severed from the trunk, while vomiting forth flames. The distance shows cities on fire, where the beast has wrought destruction; on his body are the figures 666, the total of the numerals found in the name of Napoleon Buonaparte added together, taking _a_ as one, _i_ as ten, _t_ as a hundred, and so on. Spain is represented as the champion who has had the courage to make a stand against the monster. The patriot has crippled the destroyer; the hero is armed with a sabre of _True Spanish Toledo_, and is crying, 'True patriotism shall thus subdue the monstrous beast, and quell the rage of war.' His shield is _Catalonia_, a mitre, _St. Peter's, Rome_, is his helmet; _Spanish Patriotism_ has struck the decisive blow from his right arm, _Asturias_; his sword-belt is _Madrid_; his legs _Cordova_; and with his foot, _Cadiz_, he is strangling a serpent. The fleet of Admiral Purvis is seen on the seas; Hope, with her anchor, is stooping to catch the crowns of France, Spain, and Portugal, which have been shaken from the brow of the smitten beast. _August 18, 1808._ _From the Desk to the Throne._ _A New Quick Step by Joseph Buonaparte._ _The Bass by Messrs. Nappy and Tally._ Designed by G. Sauler Farnham. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--This caricature was issued to burlesque the astonishing elevation of Joseph Buonaparte to the throne of Spain, of which, through his brother's ingenuity, he secured a brief and by no means tranquil possession. On Napoleon's coronation, his brothers had been created princes, and Joseph had been made King of Naples before the Spanish intrigue. The caricaturist's version, though striking, is not literally true. According to the print Joseph Buonaparte has one foot resting on the rail of the desk at which he lately occupied a seat, with the other he is endeavouring to touch Madrid on the map of Spain and Portugal. His pen has fallen from his ear, and he is straining to clutch the royal regalia of Spain which is above his head. From a paper pinned to the wall we are informed this remarkable promotion is taking its rise from the office of a 'public notary, Bayonne.' His fellow-clerks, pausing with their quills uplifted, to marvel at this sudden flight of ambition, are making various pertinent observations: 'What a prodigious step for a notary's clerk!' One clerk is exclaiming, 'Why, Joseph, whither art thou going?'--'Whither?' replies the elevated clerk, 'Whither, but to fill my high destiny, and, like my noble brother, sway the sceptre of another!' His colleagues are adding as riders, 'He must needs go whom the devil drives, and should it cost his neck!' But proverbs tell of many slips Between the tankard and the lips, And really I am apt to give The proverb credit as I live! _August 21, 1808._ _King Joe's Retreat from Madrid._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The occupancy of the Spanish throne has not proved, if we may trust the print, a profitable sinecure of long duration. King Joseph is rushing away from his new dignity as fast as his legs will carry him; the crown has slipped off in the flight; the fugitive's invincible standards and the 'Legions of Honour' are in tatters, but the hands of the Frenchmen are not empty; king, officers, and troops are all loaded with bags of plate and bullion. The Spanish soldiers are up in arms; their priests are encouraging the pursuers, who are firing a volley into the midst of the scared invaders, while crying 'Stop thieves! stop thieves! they have stolen the plate from the palace.' Joseph's fears are too much for his self-command; he is appealing to his great little brother, 'Why don't you stop? the Philistines are pursuing us.' Napoleon is replying from his carriage, which is tearing away up hill as fast as his coachman can urge the horses, 'I can't, brother Joe, I am in a great hurry myself.' _August 27, 1808._ _King Joe on his Spanish Donkey._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--King Joe, the new sovereign, is finding his seat anything but easy, and even his military saddle has proved a failure; the animal he has had the temerity to mount has become ungovernable; the usurper is losing his seat; the crown is flying one way, the sceptre another: 'Bless me, what a restive animal this is! I thought he would have been as gentle as a French pony, and was as easily managed as an Italian greyhound!' The Spanish donkey is neighing at a pack of 'Saddle-bags for the Spaniards,' and his heels are kicking to the winds the various proclamations, 'All found with arms to be shot!' 'No liberty to a Spaniard!' 'The road to fortune!' 'Joseph, King of Spain!' 'French news!' 'No quarter!' Thumbscrews for the rebels!' _September 12, 1808._ _A Spanish Passport to France._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--A Spanish don, dressed in all his ancient splendour, with a huge sombrero hat and feathers, a long Toledo rapier, and wearing his fierce moustachios turned up to his eyes, is kicking the French invader to France: '_Va-t'en, Coquin_.' The usurper, whose courage has disappeared, is sneaking off in undissembled terror; he is receiving the indignities inflicted by the don with abject servility: '_Votre très humble serviteur, monsieur_.' _September 12, 1808._ _The Political Butcher, or Spain cutting up Buonaparte, for the benefit of her neighbours._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--The Spanish don has put on a butcher's apron and sleeves; the body of the late 'disturber of the peace of Europe' is extended on his dissecting board, and the operator is cutting up the Corsican with professional zeal. The Spaniard is holding up his enemy's head, and encouraging the other powers, who have come to take a share in the dismemberment of the Corsican, 'Now, my little fellows, here are bones for you all to pick. The meat, being just killed, may be somewhat toughish, but I'll warrant it fresh and high-flavoured. True Corsican veal, I assure you, you see the head!' The Imperial double-headed eagle of Austria, is swooping over this morsel: 'I have long wished to strike my talons into that diabolical headpiece, and now I hope to do it effectually!' The Prussian eagle is crippled: 'Oh! the delicious morsel for an eagle to pick, but my clipt wings cannot bear me so high. Cruel Boney! why cut them so short?' The Italian greyhound is practising a new concerto called, 'If you will not when you may, when you will it shall be nay.--The harmony by Spain and Portugal.' The Danish dog is picking all the flesh left on the arm: 'The nearer the bone the sweeter the meat; but,' alluding to the presence of England, 'the nearer that Bull, the less I can eat.' The British bull-dog, who has been enjoying portions of the joints, has started up: 'I should like to have the picking of that head, for I dare say it is hare-brained!' The Russian bear is indulging in the luxury of licking the Napoleonic boots, and he is beginning to long for a taste: 'This licking gives me a mortal inclination to pick a bone, as well as the rest. But Turkey's a fine garden, and would be a vast acquisition.' Sweden, a white-coated dog, is giving good counsel to her neighbour: 'Yes, but a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!' The Dutch frog is seated on a cask of Hollands, beside a barrel of 'somniferous cordial' for King Louis; he is smoking a reflective pipe over his prospects. 'If I were sure matters are as they appear I should like to pick a bone, it is true; but wisdom bids us doubt, and prudence condemns precipitation, so I'll e'en take another whiff!' In the slaughter-house at the rear are shown the carcases of Murat, Dupont, Junot, and others, suspended by the heels. _September 15, 1808._ _The Fox and the Grapes._ Woodward del., Rowlandson sculp. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--The Corsican fox, who is still at large, has turned his tail on certain rich vines heavy with ripe Spanish grapes, which are growing beside fine prolific Portuguese plum-trees. The fox, who bears Napoleon's head, with his inevitable huge cocked hat, is speciously trying to convince the Gallic cock that the fruit, which he cannot reach, is not worth gathering, 'Believe me, my dear doodle-do, you would not like them. I found them so sour that I absolutely could not touch them!' This excuse is not satisfactory to the hearer, 'But, my good friend, you promised to bring me home some Spanish grapes and Portugal plums; where are they?' _September 17, 1808._ _Prophecy Explained._ '_And there are seven kings, five are fallen, and one is, and the other is not yet come, and when he cometh he must continue but a short space._ Revelation, chap. 17, v. 10.'--The fulfilment of prophecy is pictorially set forth with a completeness which must have been felt eminently satisfactory: the five kings that have fallen, the crowned monarchs of Prussia, Bavaria, Holland, Saxony, and Wurtemberg, are all tumbling about in the 'Slough of Disgrace and Ridicule.' The one that is, is of course 'King Nap.' The little Emperor, in all his imperial state, robes, crown, orb and sceptre, is still left standing, but his face wears an apprehensive expression, as he is gazing on the fate of the one that 'continued but a short space'--'King Joe,' to wit, who is driven beyond the Pyrenean Mountains in a state of consternation, while a fair goddess, the figure of Spanish liberty, floating on the clouds, is depriving the usurper of the Spanish crown. _September 20, 1808._ _Napoleon the Little in a Rage with his Great French Eagle._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--Napoleon, in his general's uniform, with his sword drawn, and bristling with rage up to the tip of his preposterous feather, is menacing his huge French eagle, which is much larger than himself; the Imperial crown is on the bird's head, and one of his legs is tied up--the results of damages sustained in the recent flight from Spain. It will be remembered that Joseph Buonaparte evacuated Spain August 1808. Napoleon is furiously rating his fugitive slave, 'Confusion and destruction! what is this I see? Did I not command you not to return till you had spread your wing of victory over the whole Spanish nation?'--'Ay, it's fine talking, Nap, but if you had been there, you would not much have liked it; the Spanish cormorants pursued me in such a manner that they not only disabled one of my legs, but set me a moulting in such a terrible way that I wonder I had not lost every feather; besides it got so hot I could not bear it any longer!' _September 24, 1808._ _A Hard Passage, or Boney Playing Base on the Continent._ The design suggested by G. Sauler Farnham. Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--Buonaparte, with a drum for a seat, and standing on the map of the Continent, with his foot placed on Spain and Portugal, is trying to scrape through a difficult piece of music, _Conquest of Spain and Portugal_; the music book is open on a desk before him. 'Plague take it, I never met with so difficult a _passage_ before. But if I can once get over the _flats_ we shall do pretty well, for you see the key will then change to B sharp.' The Russian bear, with a muzzle on his jaws, is trying to accompany his leader: 'Why, that is natural enough, brother Boney, though this French horn of yours seems rather out of order, I think!' _September 25, 1808._ _King Joe & Co., Making the Most of their Time previous to Quitting Madrid._ Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside. A cut-purse of the Empire and the rule, Who from the shelf the precious Diadem stole And put it in his pocket.--SHAKESPEARE. Before taking their hurried departure, the 'Intrusive King' and the French invaders are helping themselves to the spoils of the Spaniards; 'Joe' is assisting himself to the regalia; the generals are packing the royal and ecclesiastical plate of Spain into chests for transport; strong boxes are being filled with bags of ducats and medals; the troopers are making off with sacks of treasure; the curtains are torn down; pictures are wrenched from the walls, and such objects as statues, which cannot be carried away, are ruthlessly destroyed. The French, it appears, wantonly damaged or burnt all the property which came in their way when they were unable to carry it off. The wardrobe, carriages, and plunder from Madrid were retaken by the British army. The numerous carriages, of all descriptions, and tumbrils so completely blocked the road, and filled the contiguous fields, it was difficult to pass. The carriages were completely loaded with baggage, and the miserable animals pushed into deep and wet ditches. The four-wheeled tumbrils were loaded with ammunition and money; the soldiers got thousands of dollars and doubloons; it is said that one man alone secured doubloons to the value of 8,000_l._ The entire plunder, baggage, money, artillery, and the supplies of the French army were taken, carriages, animals, and a great many ladies. Joe always travelled with a suite of the latter, generally beautiful women. It is said there were ten ladies of his private family with him; those were all taken; it is said he only escaped with the clothes on his back, having lost his hat. By way of replenishing his goods and chattels he actually stole the linen, plate, and clothes from every place he stopped at, until he reached the French frontier.' _September 29, 1808._ _Nap and his Partner Joe._ Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The Dons of Spain and Portugal, reunited in a body, are heartily kicking the two Buonapartes into the mouth of a mysterious monster, opened for the reception of the pair and vomiting forth flames from a cavern supposed to represent the entrance to the infernal region. So seeing we were fairly nick'd, Plump to the Devil we boldly kick'd Both Nap and his Partner Joe! _October 1, 1808._ _Nap and his Friends in their Glory._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--A remarkably well assorted quartet, according to English views at the period, consisting of Napoleon, seated beside his friends Death, the Devil, and Joseph, ex-king of Spain. Napoleon, at whose back is a view of Malmaison, has risen to propose a toast: 'Come, gentlemen, here is success to plunder and massacre!' Two of the guests are receiving this sentiment with rapture, but 'Joe, the intruder,' is sitting in sulkiness, discomfited by the late experience which had been forced on him. A NEW SONG--NAP AND HIS FRIENDS IN THEIR GLORY. _To the Tune of 'Drops of Brandy.'_ NAP. These Spaniards are terrible rogues, They will not submit to my fetters, With patience so gracefully worn-- Nay, sought for--by nations their betters. But let us return to the charge, And no longer with levity treat them, Once get them to lay down their arms, And I'll warrant, brave boys, we shall beat them. Rum ti iddidy-iddidy, Rum ti iddidy I do! DEATH. Brother Boney, we'll never despair, A trusty good friend I have found you, Kill, plunder, and burn, and destroy, And deal desolation around you. Then gaily let's push round the glass, We'll sing and run riot and revel, And I'm sure we shall have on our side, Our very good friend here, the Devil! Rum ti iddidy-iddidy, Rum ti iddidy I do! THE DEVIL. Believe me, friend Death, you are right, Although I'm an ugly old fellow, When mischief is getting afloat, O then I am jolly and mellow. As soon as these Spaniards are crush'd Again we'll be merry and sing, Sirs, And that we will quickly 'complish, And Joey here, he shall be king, Sirs. Rum ti iddidy-iddidy, Rum ti iddidy I do! DON JOEY. Excuse me from lending my aid, You may jointly pursue them, and spike them, But lately I've seen them, and own, If I speak the plain truth, I don't like them. They Liberty cherish so dear, That they certainly make her their guide, O, Who pleases may make themselves King, But may I be devilled if I do! Rum ti iddidy-iddidy, Rum ti iddidy I do! _October 3, 1808._ _John Bull arming the Spaniards._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--John Bull has arrived to assist the Spaniards. The national prototype, grasping his cudgel of oak, and surrounded by an array of stores of his own liberal providing, is addressing friendly encouragements to the Don: 'My good friend, you see I have brought you clothing for ten thousand men, _viz._, cheese, shoes, stockings, belts, and small clothes, besides arms and ammunition, and if that won't do I'll bring you Gully and Gregson, and the Devil is in it if _they_ won't do!' His new ally is grateful, and especially looks forward to the assistance of the prize-fighters: 'We thank thee, Johnny, for all thou hast brought, and if thou canst bring the other two we shall be more obliged to thee!' John Bull has furnished his friend with a tolerably liberal outfit, piles of guns, bayonets, and swords, barrels of powder, shot galore, bales of stockings, shirts, coats, belts, shoes, with (for what reason is not shown) a marvellous selection of cheeses--Stilton, Cheshire, Gloucester, Cambridge, Yorkshire, Leicestershire, Cottenham, Bath, Wiltshire, Cream, Derbyshire, &c.; a sack of gold pieces is also included amongst the supplies: we learn that at one time, on the Peninsula, 'English guineas had no attraction, the dollar or moidore was the medium; but since guineas have been introduced in payment of the army the natives seem to appreciate their value.' _October 17, 1808._ _Junot disgorging his Booty._ Published by R. Ackermann, 101 Strand.--General Junot has been seized by a British tar, who is making the invader disgorge his plunder, consisting of utensils of gold, jewels, and specie; the Spanish Don is holding a receptacle for this costly booty in course of restitution. The French officers are stamping in despair over the disasters of their chief: '_Morbleu! comme il a mal au coeur, notre pauvre général._' Jack Tar, evidently thinking of 'the yellow boys,' is replying, 'More blue? why, ye lubber, what do ye mean by that? don't ye see it's as yellow as gold?' _November 19, 1808._ _The Progress of the Emperor Napoleon._ Published by T. Tegg, 111 Cheapside.--The career of the Corsican is set forth pictorially in a progressive series of eight pictures. 'First, A ragged-headed Corsican peasant; second, Studying mischief at the Royal Military Academy at Paris; third, An humble ensign, in a Republican corps, requesting a situation in the British army; fourth, A determined atheistical Republican general ordering his men to fire on the Parisians volleys of grape-shot; fifth, A Turk at Grand Cairo; sixth, A runaway from Egypt; seventh, A devout Catholic; eighth, An Emperor on a "throne of iniquities," _O tempora, O mores!_' On the back of the imperial seat, on which the last step of Napoleon's progress leaves him, is posted a list of murders set down to the Corsican's account:--'Duke d'Enghien, prisoners at Jaffa, Palm, Captain Williams, Pichegru, Caton, Toussant, &c., &c.' AN ACADEMY FOR GROWN HORSEMEN, AND ANNALS OF HORSEMANSHIP. COMMUNICATED BY GEOFFREY GAMBADO, ESQ. _Riding Master of the Horse, and Grand Equerry to the Doge of Venice._ ILLUSTRATED WITH PLATES, DESIGNED BY H. BUNBURY, ETCHED BY T. ROWLANDSON. To turn and wind a fiery Pegasus, And witch the world with noble horsemanship.--SHAKESPEARE. [Illustration] GEOFFREY GAMBADO, ESQ. 'As I shall be as concise and explicit as possible in the valuable instructions and discoveries I am now about to communicate to the world, it will be the reader's own fault if he does not profitably benefit by them. When I have told him how to choose a horse, how to tackle him properly, in what sort of dress to ride him, how to ride him out, and, above all, how to ride him home again, if he is not a complete horseman in the course of ten or a dozen summers, I will be bold to foretell that neither the skill of Mr. Astley, nor the experience of Mr. John Gilpin, will ever make him one. 'Nil desperandum, me duce Teucro. 'DIRECTIONS FOR THE ROAD. 'In riding the road, observe in passing a whisky, a phaeton, or a stage-coach, in short, any carriage where the driver sits on the right hand, to pass it on that side, he may not see you on the other, and though you may meet with a lash in the eye, what is the loss of an eye to a leg, or perhaps a neck. 'Take care never to throw your horse down, it is an unlucky trick, and fit only for boys. Many gentlemen of my acquaintance, and I too, have been thrown down by our horses; yet I scarce know an instance upon record of a gentleman throwing his horse down, but many have complained to me of their servants doing it for them. [Illustration: HOW TO PASS A CARRIAGE.] 'In passing a waggon or any tremendous equipage, should it run pretty near a bank, and there be a ditch and an open country on the other side, if you are on business and in a hurry, dash up the bank without hesitation, for should you take the other side, and your horse shy at the carriage, you may be carried many hundred yards out of your road, whereas by a little effort of courage you need only graze the wheel, fly up the bank, and by slipping or tumbling down into the road again go little or nothing out of your way. 'ACCIDENTAL EXPERIMENTS AND EXPERIMENTAL ACCIDENTS, COMMUNICATED BY VARIOUS CORRESPONDENTS. _'Letter to Mr. G. Gambado._ '"Sir--I want your advice, and hope you will give it me concerning a horse I have lately bought, and which does not carry me at all in the same way he did the man I bought him of. Being recommended to a dealer in Moorfields (who, I think, is no honester than he ought to be), I went to him and desired to look into his stable, and so he took me in, with a long whip in his hand, which, he said, was to wake the horses that might perhaps be asleep, as they were but just arrived from a long journey, coming fresh from the breeders in the North. There were some fine-looking geldings, I thought, and I pitched upon one that I thought would suit me, and so he was saddled, and I desired the dealer to mount him, and he did, and a very fine figure the gelding cut; and so the people in the street said, and a decent man in a scratch-wig said the man who rode him knew how to make the most of him, and so I bought him. But he goes in a different manner with me, for instead of his capering like a trooper he hangs down his head and tail, and neither whip nor spur can get him out of a snail's gallop. And I want to know whether by law I must keep him, as he is certainly not the horse I took him for, and therefore I ought to have my money again. [Illustration: HOW TO MAKE THE MOST OF A HORSE.] '"The limner in our lane was with me when I bought him, and has taken a picture of him as he was with the dealer on his back, and another as he now goes with me upon his back, by which you will see the difference, and judge how better to advise me upon it. '"I am, Sir, your humble servant, '"TOBIAS HIGGINS. '"Lavender Row, Shoreditch." '_Mr. Gambado's Reply._ '"Sir--Upon a strict examination of the two pictures by the limner in your lane, I am clear you are in possession of the identical horse you intended to purchase, although he does not exhibit quite so much agility under you, or make so tearing a figure as when mounted by Mr. ----, who I am well acquainted with, and who, you may depend, is as honest a man as any that deals in horseflesh. '"You could have no right to return the horse if he went no better than one with his legs tied. You stand in the predicament of Lord ----, who gave twenty guineas for Punch, and when he found he could not make him speak prosecuted the showman; but my Lord Chief Justice adjudged the man to keep his money, and my Lord his Punch, although he could not get a word out of him. '"My opinion is, sir, as you ask it, that the decent man in the scratch-wig made a very sensible remark when he observed that my friend Mr. ---- knew how to make the most of a horse, and I am satisfied that you, sir, know with equal facility how to make the least of one. '"I am, Sir, your humble servant, '"G. GAMBADO. '"P.S.--I am sorry to add my maid tells me that two shillings out of your five were very bad ones." [Illustration: HOW TO MAKE THE LEAST OF HIM.] '_Letter to G. Gambado, Esq._ '"Sir--Being informed that you are now at home, and desirous of giving every information in your power to those who may stand in need of it respecting their horses, I beg leave to submit my case to you, which, considering how fond I am of the chase, you must admit to be a lamentable one. Relying, however, sir, as I do, on your philanthropy (I should more properly say Phillipigy) and that zeal in the cause which has so long characterised you, I make no doubt but the small difficulties I now labour under will be soon surmounted. '"You must know, sir, I am very fond of hunting, and live in as fine a scenting country as any in the kingdom. The soil is pretty stiff, the leaps large and frequent, and a great deal of timber to get over. Now, sir, my brown horse is a very capital hunter, and though he is slow, and I cannot absolutely ride over the hounds (indeed the country is so enclosed that I do not see so much of them as I could wish), yet in the end he generally brings me in before the huntsman goes home with the dogs. So thus far I have no reason to complain. Now, sir, my brown horse is a noble leaper, and never gave me a fall in his life that way, but he has got an awkward trick (though he clears everything with his fore-legs in capital style) of leaving the other two on the wrong side of the fence, and if the gate or stile happens to be in a sound state, it is a work of time and trouble to get his hind-legs over. He clears a ditch finely indeed with two feet, but the others constantly fall in; that gives me a strange pain in my back like what is commonly called lumbago, and unless you kindly stand my friend, and instruct me how I am to bring these hind-legs after me, I fear I shall never get rid of it. If you please, sir, you may ride him a-hunting yourself any day you will please to appoint, and you shall be heartily welcome. You will then be better enabled to give me your advice; you can't have a proper conception of the jerks he will give you without trying him. [Illustration: HOW TO DO THINGS BY HALVES.] '"I am, Sir, with due respect, '"Your very humble servant, '"NIC. NUTMEG, Clerk." '_The Answer._ '"REVEREND SIR,--Your brown horse being so good a hunter, and, as you observe, having so fine a notion of leaping, I should be happy if I could be of any service in assisting you to make his two hind-legs follow the others, but, as you observe, they seem so very perverse and obstinate that I cherish but small hopes of prevailing upon them. '"I have looked and found many such cases, but no cure. '"However, in examining my papers I have found out something that may prove of service to you in your very lamentable case. [Illustration: TRICKS UPON TRAVELLERS.] '"An hostler has informed me that it is a common trick played upon bagsters or London riders, when they are not generous to the servants at the inn, for a wicked boy or two to watch one of them as he turns out of the gateway, and to pop a bush or stick under his horse's tail, which he instantly brings down upon the stick, and holds it fast, kicking at the same time at such a rate as to dislodge the bagman that bestrides him. Here, sir, is a horse that lifts up his hind-legs without moving his fore ones, and just the reverse, as I may say, of yours, and perhaps the hint may be acceptable. Suppose, then, when your horse has flown over a gate or a stile in his old way, with his fore-legs only, you were to dismount and clap your whip or stick properly under his tail and then mount again, the putting him in a little motion will set him on his kicking principles in a hurry, and it's ten to one but, by this means, you get his hind-legs to follow the others. You will be able, perhaps, to extricate your stick from its place of confinement when you are up and over (if you are not down), but should you not it is but sixpence gone. I send you this as a mere surmise; perhaps it may answer, perhaps not. '"I beg to thank you for your offer, which is a very kind one, but I beg to be excused accepting it; all my ambition being to add to the theory with as little practice as possible. '"I am, Rev. Sir, your most humble servant, '"G. GAMBADO." '_Letter to G. Gambado, Esq._ '"GOOD SIR,--I am in great haste, having a great quickness of pulse, and my bed being now warming, but cannot get into it without first informing you how fast I came home from market to-night, and upon my old mare, too, who was always unkind before as to going. But so it happened. The old mare, that I could never get to go above three miles an hour, as soon as ever I was up, set off, and the devil couldn't stop her till she got home--ten miles in about fifty-eight minutes. I'm in a heat yet. But I have found out her motive, and now the public may make use of it. I had bought a couple of lobsters to carry home, had their claws tied up, and put one into each of my great-coat pockets. Well, the old gentleman in my right pocket (a cunning one, I warrant him) somehow or other contrived to disengage his hands, and no doubt soon applied them to the old mare's side, and, I imagine, had got fast hold of a rib by the time I reached the first mile-stone, for she was mad, I thought, and my hat and wig were gone in a twinkle. However, when I got off, and had taken a little breath, I went into the kitchen to unload, but missed one of my lobsters; so I ran back into the stable, and there was the hero hanging at the old mare's side; she'd had enough of it, and so stood quiet. [Illustration: HOW TO MAKE THE MARE TO GO.] [Illustration: HOW TO PREVENT A HORSE SLIPPING HIS GIRTHS.] '"I thought myself bound to inform you of this, hoping it would prove a great national discovery. I mean to keep lobsters on purpose, for it's cheaper than buying a horse instead of my old mare; and I can go faster with one of them in my pocket than I could post. When my boys come home from school, to hunt in the forest, I mean to treat each of them with a cray-fish for his pony, and then, I think, we shall head the field. '"I am, sir, yours, ever in haste, '"PETER PUFFIN." [Illustration: THE APOTHEOSIS OF GEOFFREY GAMBADO, ESQ.] '_Letter to_ MR. G. GAMBADO, _editor of various learned performances_. '"SIR,--You have no doubt heard of a description of Natural Philosophers, called Pigeon Fanciers, who breed the bird of that name, and all its varieties. I was once, sir, a member of this community, till growing tired of punters, tumblers, nuns, croppers, runts, &c., &c., I was resolved to enlarge my ideas, by extending my researches and abandoning the biped, to obtain a closer acquaintance with the quadruped. I became a horse-fancier. Being fond of riding, and daily observing, in my airings to Brentford, a great variety of horses, and a still greater variety in their motions, I, some years since, set about making a collection of such as were singular and eccentric in their shapes and actions, and I flatter myself no private museum can boast of a more admirable variety than I have possessed. * * * * * '"As amongst pigeons, so amongst horses, there are tumblers. The feat is, however, performed differently, and varies considerably in its effect on the performers. As the pigeon executes this without anything on its back, so the horse seldom achieves it without somebody upon his. To the latter, therefore, we must give the greatest share of merit, who ventures to perform upon a hard road what the other does only in the air, without even a cloud to brush against. The one preferring, it seems, the Milky, and the other the Highway. '"Among horses, I have never discovered a pouter; but I have had a fine puffer. The noise he made, however, and particularly when at his business, was not pleasant; and I let a neighbour have him cheap, who had a good three-stall museum, and a very heavy vehicle to draw; so that in all weathers he might enjoy the entertainment of his very extraordinary qualifications. [Illustration: THE TUMBLER, OR ITS AFFINITIES.] '"It is well known that there is a horse that is called a carrier, so there is a pigeon likewise. But as it may not be known to every one, I must inform you that from very long observation, I find the pigeon is the most expeditious of the two. '"I am, sir, your very humble servant, '"BENJ. BUFFON." 'ADVICE TO WOULD-BE HORSEMEN. 'I have given you the hints contained in my previous letters supposing you are at home enough on horseback to ride out alone, and may possibly be tempted to travel the road, as either the lucre of gain, or the _universal passion_, as a celebrated author calls the love of fame, may send you forth. 'Let me entreat you to examine your tackling well at setting out, particularly from an inn and after dinner. See that your girths are tight; many a good fall have I got by not attending to this. Ostlers are too apt to be careless, and ought never to be paid till we see them the next time.[7] An instance of a singular nature occurred at Huntingdon a few years since to the Rev. D. B., of Jesus College, in Cambridge, which has given a discovery to the world (productive, indeed, of a paper war), but which may turn out beneficial to mankind, as it proves 3 to be equal to 4. [Illustration: HOW TO RIDE A HORSE UPON THREE LEGS.] 'The Doctor dined at the "Crown"; it was dusk when he set out northwards. I myself saw 3_s._ charged in his bill for wine; this accounts for his want of observation. As for the ostler's, I must attribute it to his having been paid beforehand. The Doctor went off at a spurt pretty much in the manner I have recommended, and having got clear of the pavement he wished to (what is called) mend his pace; but his horse was obdurate, and all his influence could not prevail. The Doctor fancied at times he went oddly, and therefore brought to at Alconbury, five miles from Huntingdon, and alighted for an examination, when he discovered that the ostler, through inattention, had buckled up one of the horse's hind-legs in the surcingle; and to this alone he had to attribute his hobbling way of going. 'There was an ostler[8] at Barnet who was a moralist, possibly this at Huntingdon was an experimental philosopher, and thought an old member of the University the most proper subject to put his experiment in execution. It certainly answered as far as five miles; but how it would succeed in bringing horses of different forms together over Newmarket, I am not competent to determine. It seems as if one might work a lame horse thus and keep his unsound leg quiet. If this experiment has been repeated it has been in private, for I have not heard of it; and I much question if it would ever be generally adopted. When I say _generally_, no reflection upon general officers. A timid major, however, might keep his horse in due subjection on a review day by this method. 'GEOFFREY GAMBADO. [Illustration: DR. CASSOCK, F.R.S., INVENTOR OF THE PUZZLE FOR TUMBLE-DOWN HORSES.] '_Letter to_ MR. GAMBADO. '"I return you my most hearty thanks for the very salutary advice you have been good enough to give me, from which I have derived much improvement, and should have acknowledged sooner had I made sufficient trial of the fine machine you recommended in such warm terms. My hobby, as I told you before, is an admirable animal, and finely calculated for a pensive man like myself to take the air upon. It was a pity he was prone to tumble, and that, too, in stony roads the most, for he was otherwise bordering on perfection. So I sent for a carpenter on the receipt of your recipe, and had a large puzzle of oak made for him, after the pattern of those worn by the Squire's pointers, and I have found it answer prodigiously. '"I have had nothing like a bad fall lately, except one day in cantering over a ploughed field, where, upon a blunder, the machine entered the ground with such force as to introduce a portion of the hobby's head along with it. We came clean over, and for some time I thought my hobby's neck was broken. I did not mind it myself; but I shall take care in future always to gallop on the hard road, and then such another catastrophe cannot ensue. '"I am, sir, '"Your very obsequious humble servant, '"CALEB CASSOCK. '" P.S.--I forgot to tell you my parishioners stare at me a good deal. The machine has an odd appearance, I own, but not altogether unpicturesque. I got the drawing master of Mr. Birch's school to send you a sketch of us. It is esteemed a likeness. That of the hobby is rather flattering." '_My Remarks._ '"I am happy to find the puzzle has answered so well; and I doubt not now it has been tried and approved by such a right-headed reverend gentleman, one who is also so good a horseman, and understands all the matter so well, that, by producing his name, I shall be able to get a patent for it, which cannot but prove very lucrative, for who has the horse that he will swear will never tumble down? '"This I believe would be a question that would pose (upon oath) every man on horseback in Hyde Park on a Sunday. '"Though Dr. Shaw, who is a great traveller indeed, has the modesty to assure us that the Barbary horses never lie down; yet even he has not the effrontery to say that they never tumble down! '"G. G." '_To_ G. GAMBADO, ESQ. '"SIR,--Hearing much of your knowledge in horses, I beg leave to ask your advice in a business where my delicacy, as a gentleman, is deeply concerned, and flatter myself that you will sensibly feel for my situation, my future fortune in life depending on your decision. I have the happiness to be well received by a young lady of fortune in this town, who rides out every morning, and has had the goodness to permit me to join her for some days past. I flatter myself I am beloved, but, sir, the horse I ride is my father's, and he will not allow me to part with him: and this horse, sir, has an infirmity of such an embarrassing nature, that our interviews are unpleasantly interrupted at frequent intervals, and my dear Miss S---- will perhaps ride away with some other gownsman who is more decently mounted. '"Be pleased, sir, to send me a recipe for this complaint, or I may lose my dear girl for ever. I have tried several experiments, but all in vain, and unless you stand my friend I shall go distracted. '"I am, dear Sir, in a great fuss, yours most truly, '"GEORGE GILLYFLOWER. '"St. John's Coll. Cam." [Illustration: 'JUVENUM PULCHERRIMUS ALTER, ALTERA QUAS ORIENS HABUIT PRÆLATA PUELLIS.'--OVID.] '_Note from my Farrier to the above._ [Illustration: HOW TO TRAVEL UPON TWO LEGS IN A FROST.] '"HONOURED SIR,--By advice from Mr. Gambado of your horse's complaint, I have sent you a powder so strong, that, if administered night and morning in his corn, I will be bold to say, no horse in England shall ever suffer from the like again after Thursday next. Shall be very thankful for your Honour's custom in the same way in future, and your lady's too, if agreeable; being, Honoured Sir, '"Your servant to command, '"JO. WOOD". '_To_ GEOFFREY GAMBADO, ESQ. '"KIND SIR,--I have an extraordinary story to tell you, that happened to me t'other day, as I was bringing two pair of stays to Miss Philpot's, at Kentishtown. I lives, sir, at Finchley; and a-top of Highgate Hill, my horse makes a kind of slip with his hind feet, do you see, for it was for all the world like a bit of ice the whole road. I'd nothing for't but to hold fast round his neck, and to squeeze me elbows in to keep the stays safe; and egad, off we set, and never stopt till I got to the bottom. He never moved a leg didn't my horse, but slided promiscuously, as I may say, till he oversate somebody on the road; I was too flurrisome to see who: and the first body I see'd it was a poor man axing charity in a hat. My horse must have had a rare bit of bone in his back, and I sit him as stiff as buckram. '"Your honor's obedient servant, '"JAMES JUMPS."' _The Art of ingeniously tormenting_, with five plates by Woodward and Rowlandson (Tegg). _The Caricature Magazine, or Hudibrastic Mirror_, in numbers. THE CARICATURE MAGAZINE OR MIRROR OF MIRTH BEING A COLLECTION OF HUMOROUS AND SATIRICAL CARICATURES DESIGNED AND ENGRAVED BY THOMAS ROWLANDSON, ESQ. LONDON PUBLISHED BY THOMAS TEGG 111 CHEAPSIDE [Illustration: TITLE TO 'CARICATURE MAGAZINE.'] _The Beauties of Tom Brown_, embellished with engravings by Rowlandson, one vol.